My SIL (ex-SIL? Not sure what she is now. Widowed-SIL?) is a total...um...mean, evil witch. My brother was killed in Iraq in 2008. They had been married for 8 years. On his first tour she had an affair. She got pregnant the weekend he returned. But was still having the affair the weekend before. So...was it my brother's baby? Who knows? He stayed with her and raise "his" son (he looks just like him, so we're pretty sure he is his). Then a week after his son's 1st birthday he left for his second tour in Iraq. He was killed 4 months later.
At the funeral she would not let my family choose even ONE song that was to be played. Instead she chose very not-funeral-appropriate songs (and not even songs he liked). My mom was just requesting ONE song that represented his past and cultural roots. She made a video montage, which was nice, but she misspelled his middle name. That doesn't make her a witch, though. But it was weird. And the day before the funeral she went on a shopping spree (spending some of the $500K she received from the Army) and bought 5 Coach purses. She also told the Army Chaplain that was "directing" the funeral to only let his parents and I only get up and speak for 2 minutes. We told the Chaplain to try and drag us off the microphone after 2 minutes and see what happens. We definitely took more than 2 minutes!
Then at the graveside military funeral she asked them to only put two chairs in the front row on my brother's families' side for my parents and put me in the second row. I had to move my chair to next to them in front of everyone. It was so humiliating!
When we all (her family and mine) went to the base to meet some high ups before greeting the plane that carried his body on the tarmac, she introduced HER parents as his parents when his actual parents (my parents) were right there in the room. It was very rude, awkward and embarrassing. Keep in mind that we all had a great relationship with my brother. There was no reason for any of this.
After all that, she wouldn't let any of us have any of his belongings. My mom had bought him hundreds of dollars of these collectible "toys" that he collected and she wanted just one back as a memento but she refused. He and I always traded/stole eachother t-shirts because we wore the same style and size. I wanted just one (any one) shirt of his. She refused. She also has always refused to send us pictures of his son. All she would do was 'friend' us on facebook so we could see what she posted.
Then 6 months after his death she got engaged to another soldier. She was pregnant with their baby soon after and is now pregnant again. She refuses to marry him, though, because then her death benefits would stop for his/her son. She has now de-friended me and my dad from facebook (because my dad and her dad got into an argument on the 3rd anniversary of his death- her dad is a bully and made a "joke" about how my dad didn't understand what serving in the military was like because he never served his country like he did. He knows the ONLY reason he couldn't serve like he wanted to was because he has polio and is disabled!)
She (and her whole family) has made the grieving process so much more difficult. :( I wish she was never my SIL!