12mo throws horrific tantrums

[AFWife]

I really don't know what to do here. My first didn't do this so I'm lost. (When they say "They're all different" it's serious)

He gets to the point that he's so upset and hysterical that he won't let anyone comfort him. Last night I couldn't hold him while I was making dinner (and he doesn't like to be worn around the house unless he's napping) and he didn't want Daddy. He was throwing himself out of Daddy's arms so DH put him on the floor. When I got to a pause point and walked over to pick him up he threw himself AWAY from me. He pulled at my leg a few secs later so I picked him up. He promptly pushed his feet into my tummy and thew himself backwards. I had to put him down (I would have thrown my back out or dropped him otherwise) He screamed...and screamed...and screamed...I sat on the couch and he came over, leaned toward me, and then threw himself back. Repeat. We put him in the highchair to eat dinner and he sat and screamed for half of it and then still refused to eat. It was a big deal that he finally drank some water.

We went upstairs for bedtime bath and he was fine! We all read a book (I also have a 2.5yo) and the boys went to bed.

He must have thrown 2-3 tantrums like this yesterday. Same deal each time: throwing himself out of my arms, screaming hysterically, etc...

DH suggested I bring a Pack-N-Play downstairs to have a safe place to contain him while he does this...it just seems mean. But if he won't let me comfort him what else am I supposed do?

[AnkaJones]

Yikes!  That sounds like a difficult situation.  Putting the baby in the Pack n Play sounds like a really good idea.  You can't let your baby hurt you, and it sounds like he's endangering himself, too, when you try to hold him.  The Pack n Play sounds like a safe place for him to get through the worst of his tantrum.  Perhaps if you stay nearby to comfort him once he's through the angry part of the tantrum you'd be more comfortable with that approach?

Anka

[MsDolphin]

My DS (16 mon) has moments like that in the middle of the night. I originally thought is was night terrors (which some episodes might have been). When I tried to hold him to comfort him, I was worried he would get hurt because I wasn't able to hold him well with him fighting it. I think the Pack-n-play is a good option.

I also think you should post in the TODDLER section, I think it's more parents with kids 12months plus in that forum, they might have more in-sight.

[anjsmama]

My 11.5 month old does this pretty much every  day between 430 - 530 pm. Then after dinner, she's all smiles for bath and book time and goes to bed with no problem. Honestly, I think she's just tired. Yet she's not quite ready for sleep, she doesn't like the business of me making dinner, so she wants me to pick her up, and then realizes that's not really comfy or soothing since I'm cooking, so she wants down, and then when I put her down she gets overwhelmed and screams again tugging at my leg. Her own spot in the living room with a bag of blocks where she can play, solemnly, gated off from me, seems to be the only thing that keeps her content during those times. And maybe a cracker or two .

Do you find your DS does this at the same time (or 2 times) per day? I find that I can't really work around my DD's natural schedule 100% the way I did when DD was a baby, because, well, it's not just her. I sometimes have to keep moving through her fussy times because DH and DS need me too. In that sense, I feel that she is sort of entitled to those tantrums. After all, she's just a babe, and I'd be frustrated too if I were her, KWIM? It's gotten a little better in the last few weeks since she got into blocks and flipping through books, because she's willing to sit and do those sort of quiet activities while she works through it.

[MPsSweetie]

Abbotts been doing it also! ugh, it sucks!