I'm 8 days from my 'early' EDD (ultrasound) and 11 days from my 'late' EDD (based on the date I was pretty sure I conceived...but I wasn't charting and I had a bunch of easy ultrasounds when they were tracking development very carefully so...after much debate I'm inclined to trust the early EDD.
This is my 5th, and my first 4 children were from 4 days to 18 days late .so I'm not inclined to think this child is going to arrive early. I just had a pretty intense day at work and though I was having contractions and was sore at the end of the day, I don't feel like my body is nearing labour yet. I'm still pretty chipper, I have great focus at work - for me, losing focus at work is always a sign that I'm nearing labour day - I usually start making dumb mistakes and forgetting things in the 24 hours leading up to labour. Not there yet.
I'm working up to the day before my due date and have a HUGE deadline to meet as well as a pretty high-stakes thing I have to do that day....I'm realllllly hoping baby stays inside until my due date. I'd really be stunned to have this baby early and have to dump all this stuff on my colleagues. I had to take 2.5 weeks of sick leave in December all of a sudden, and my hell weeks suddenly ended up being my friends' problem. I felt so guilty. I'm really trying to keep it reasonable in terms of committing to things, but I'm just such a type A personality I can't seem to let go of work....I just want to leave everything perfect so that the person who has to pick up my remaining files doesn't feel burdened by my maternity leave.
At the same time, I'm desperate to hold this child in my arms. It's been a really challenging last two years for us, and although we've had many successes, we've had some devastating losses and real health struggles - so this is going to be such an awesome way to start a new year.
My blessing way is tomorrow, and I'm so excited. I really had to humble myself to ask my sister in law to host one for me - I had hoped someone would suggest it, but at the same time I also wanted it enough that I was able to ask for it. I'm having 14 friends and family over, plus my two oldest daughters, and we're going to do henna tattoos on my belly and everyone is going to have their own small henna. They are all bringing meals for after baby, which is the most amazing thing ever. I always end up doing way too much way too soon and last baby ended up flat on my ass with mastitis with a 2 week old and 3 other kids. Then we got thrush. It was the pits. I promised myself to do NOTHING for 2 weeks after birth.
As I reflect on that, I realize It's been different for me this pregnancy. I've always had to be the heroic mom who did it all, and never asked for help. I think being an older mom this time and having 4 kids already, I have finally realized that if I always do it all, no one is going to offer help because I make it look easy. I've also learned that my friends and family love us and love to help us. It makes them feel close to our big, happy family, it gives them opportunities to bond with our kids, it lets them show off their cooking, or sheet-folding, or show-shoveling skills. When anyone offers me help now, I grab it. And if they don't offer, I don't hesitate to ask. My mom booked herself a trip to Palm Springs for Feb 9th and I told her flat out - "I'm going to have a 3 week old with 4 other kids...I need you here, I'm going to need your help." She cancelled her ticket the next day, so pleased at being needed - I think she was kind of relieved.
Anyway - late night ramblings from me. I'm enjoying so much hearing how everyone is feeling right now.