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Introductions

post #1 of 64
Thread Starter 

Name: Boots/Betsy

If pregnant, EDD: 8/15

Size and/or weight (if you want to share): 26

Time TTC: 17 months! Finally diagnosed with PCOS, 1 round of Clomid did it :)

Other children? no

 

I am glad to have this space, I hope we find a lot of like-minded women. I have been fat all my life and in the past several years have become interested in the size acceptance, health-at-any-size philosophy. I have also been treated for depression and had to stop my meds when I got pregnant. It's been harder to maintain my body image off my medication.

I was feeling a little isolated in my DDC (and the "belly pics") and also I have a coworker who is also pregnant. She got pregnant her second month, and is very slender, she's just a few weeks ahead of me I know she will start showing very soon and I'm trying to prepare myself for that.

I've been feeling pretty good most of this pregnancy, week 8 was the hardest both emotionally and with some nausea, my hormones are really ramping up, I guess.

I have also been thinking about being a/the "fat mom" and if my child will care.

I love the Ample Mother blog and I'm on her facebook page but I haven't found a really good plus-size pregnancy/motherhood community anywhere online, hope we can make it happen!

 

 

post #2 of 64

Name: Elizabeth

If pregnant, EDD: 8/20

Size and/or weight (if you want to share): 22-24

Time TTC: Ummm, none. This pregnancy was a total surprise!

Other children? Yes, two girls (5 and almost 2)

 

Since this is my third pregnancy, I feel like I know what to expect, but this time around I thought it would be nice to seek the company of other plus sized moms, something I have never done before. I wanted to join a group on Mothering because I find the huge mainstream boards to be chaotic and hard to navigate!

 

Betsy, I know what you mean about the belly pics and how that can be isolating. My body has changed a lot since my first pregnancy. I now have a pretty large, hanging stomach, which is something I did not have before. It has gotten worse after both of my previous pregnancies. That has been the hardest change for me to deal with and I am worried about it getting worse with this pregnancy. I am also concerned about the fact that I am 25-30 lbs heavier than I have been with my previous pregnancies. I also want to be more active this time around but somehow can't get motivated. I didn't exercise regularly pre-pregnancy but I have done some running/walking on and off for the past year so it shouldn't be a big deal for me to get out and walk a mile or two in the evenings, but I seriously do not feel like it lately and I know from previous experience that if I don't get in the habit now I may never get to it...

 

Thanks for starting this group!

post #3 of 64

 

Name: Sarah Jane

If pregnant, EDD: 8/10/12

Size and/or weight (if you want to share): 18ish 

Time TTC: 5 months 

Other children? None 

 

I didn't grow up fat (I was always the one teased for having "chicken legs") but a couple of my sisters have always been chubby, which meant there was a lot of weight-related talk (mostly I overheard my mom defending my sisters by saying they'd probably grow out of it). I started gaining weight in my late 20's. And then about 4-5 years ago, I gained weight more rapidly and my cycles became very irregular. It took awhile, but late in 2010 I was diagnosed with PCOS. 

I started to understand fatphobia, and how it had always affected me and those I loved, once I became fat. I really wish I'd figured it out earlier, as I know I said some pretty hurtful things over the years. These days, I really believe that our worth doesn't have anything to do with our size, and that it's possible to be healthy and happy as a fat woman. Other people sure do take issue with this at times, but that is *their* problem - it is not a problem with me and my body. 

Getting pregnant was somewhat of a challenge for me because I was not ovulating regularly due to PCOS. My reproductive endocrinologist did mildly emphasize weight loss (& discussed it at most visits), but fortunately she did not condition my treatment on losing weight. I did make some small, sustainable changes in how I eat and managed to lose a little, but I tried to measure things in how I felt, and in how I responded to clomid. It took a few months (with a few roadblocks along the way) but we got our BFP on December 1st! And now I'm happily on to the challenge of being fat and pregnant smile.gif

I just started taking belly pics again today and I *think* my lower belly is a little bigger now, but I'm not sure (and my partner can't tell - but he seems to think my boobs are bigger ROTFLMAO.gif). I do sometimes have moments where I sort of grieve the very obvious baby belly I used to think I'd have, but I'm trying to be grateful that right now I've got a nice cushion between my embryo and the world. 

post #4 of 64

Name: Cristeen

If pregnant, EDD: 5/28

Size and/or weight (if you want to share): Haven't a clue.  I think I was down to an 18/20 pants before I got pg. 

Time TTC: This time we weren't technically TTC.  After DS was born we decided we could be happy with 1 and weren't going to do any more ART, but just let life happen.  So we weren't TTA either.  But the kids will be about 2 years, 9 mos apart (got the BFP the week of DS' 2nd bday).

Other children? Yup.  DS1 died at birth, and DS is 2y4m. 

 

I've always been "big" - even when I wasn't overweight.  I have the shoulders of a football player, and the frame to match, except I'm short.  So even when I was a "healthy" size (as a kid), I was teased for being fat.  I hit puberty about the same time my mom died, my dad retreated into his work, and the only food in the house was frozen pizzas, PB&J and mac & cheese.  So that's what we lived off of, and gained lots of weight. 

 

I was diagnosed with PCOS in my early 20s, married in my late 20s, and had DS1 after 9 mos of ART (almost 5 years ago, now).  With DS we went through almost 2 years of ART, took a break planning to advance to IUI after letting my body recover from the drugs, and got pregnant during that break.  And like I said above, this time we just let nature take it's course, figuring we could be happy with 1. 

 

For pg changes, the first thing I notice is darkening areolas.  Then my boobs start filling out (I'm a small C cup usually, but I noticed yesterday I'm outgrowing my Cs at 20 weeks).  Then the top of my tummy starts rounding out - right below my breasts.  The lower part of my tummy never really visually changed with the boys (it got firmer, but nobody else knows that) - at 9 mos pg with DS I could pass as just fat.  But I do get the upper curve, so rather then my tummy kind of sloping from my my rib cage down into the curve, it actually juts out... kinda hard to explain.  I have found that certain styles of maternity clothing are preferable to others...  most of my clothes are just cut like bags, and they hide the small details, so I'm just looking (even more) fat.  But the ones that actually hug my tummy, and show the transition from breast to belly really help define it, and help me not to feel so self-conscious.  I can actually proudly flaunt my belly at this point.  So I'm being really careful in the styles I'm selecting in maternity clothes.  But the big problem I'm running into is the variability of sizing.  A 2x in one style/brand is too small, but a 3x in another is much too big.  Oh, and definitely stay away from Cafe Press' maternity tops.  They run about 3 sizes smaller than marked (their 2x maternity = Lg non maternity). 

post #5 of 64

 

Name: Scarlett

If pregnant, EDD: 06/12/2012

Size and/or weight (if you want to share):Just getting into a 14 before pg but mostly a 16, weight 219 currently (223 pre preg)

Time TTC: Not actually trying. This was a surprise baby really thought I was never going to be pg again.

Other children? DD born and died Jan 6, 2006, M/C Nov 19, 2006, DS born Jan 29, 2008

 

I always thought I was fat and was told I was fat by other family members and Dr.s but when I look back at my pictures I was a solid little kid and a chubby pre teen but not what i would call fat now. I have always been self conscious about my weight and I think it really held me back when I was a kid, teen, young adult. I met my DH in 1996 after losing some weight and then went on depo provera and gained like 30 pounds in 3 mons and went into serious depression/anxiety and started putting on more weight. By the time we married in 1999 I weighed 60 pounds more then when we met. After getting back from our honeymoon we decided to TTC and when things were not happening and my cycles were really irregular was diagnosed with PCOS. Went through some fertility stuff but the specialist kept harping on me about my weight and I felt really powerless to change it, tried a few rounds of clomid and it didn't help and I couldn't take the disappointment anymore. Resigned myself to being happy being an auntie and maybe never having my life long dream of motherhood. Went to school and became an ECE and enjoyed my work with children and sort of went into denial of my PCOS. The beginning of 2005 I decided I need to do something about my weight which was about 250 at this point and my PCOS symptoms. Joined a support group made some dietary changes, started exercising, went to see a new endo and started up on Metformin again. I got pregnant with my DD after 2 mons of metformin and dropping about 15 pounds. It wasn't until after the birth and death of my daughter that I started to become more excepting and appreciative of my body for what it can do and not for how it looked in jeans and a tank top. Anyway my weight fluctuated with my emotions and when I got pregnant with DS on our own (cycles returned to normal and PCOS pretty much disappeared after DD) in 2007 I was about 230 or so and 260 when I had him. I was diagnosed with pre-diabetes in March of this year after letting my weight creep back up to 260 over the 3 years after having DS. I totally re-hauled my eating and started exercising again and got my blood sugars under control and lost 45 pounds and then found out I was pregnant at the beginning of Nov. (I was about 6 weeks but thought I was going through pre-menopause) I too have a hangy belly which has gotten worse with each pregnancy and c-section (2 c-sections)

 

I am currently 17w5d and I look like I have a bump if wearing maternity clothes but mostly still have the B belly with the upper belly sticking out more and more rounded and my lower belly is out more but is flabby and hangy. I did look pregnant with my other pregnancies once I got past about 20 weeks or so and I weigh about 10 pounds less then I did with DS so am hoping for a nice round belly this time too. I too feel a bit sad when looking at the bump pics in my DDC, I have only taken one picture of my bump so far but I think i will start to take weekly ones starting on Tues (18wks) I think I may even post it in my DDC. it is nice to have a place were I can relate to what everyone else has said and we can post our pics and feel in the norm.

post #6 of 64
Name: LivingSky / Allison
If pregnant, EDD: n/a
Size and/or weight (if you want to share): 18-20
Time TTC: 7 months for DS
Other children? DS was born July 14, 2011

Boots, thanks for creating this group!

I'm not currently TTC, but have been on MDC since I started TTC my first, so back in mid 2010. At that time, my doctor definitely wanted me to lose weight before trying to get pregnant, but all of my test results were normal, so I went ahead with TTC anyways. It took 7 months to conceive, then went on to have a perfectly normal pregnancy, labour, and delivery, despite the fat-phobic issues I had with my initial midwife and OB.

Anyway, I'm hovering around 260 lbs, which was my pre-pregnancy weight. I'm hoping to lose some before starting to TTC again this spring. I'm trying to improve my eating habits before DS starts solids, because I don't want him to learn bad eating habits from me. I've been overweight all my life and never been able to get it under control for myself, but I'm hoping that I can do it for him! I'll certainly never be 'slim' even with good eating habits, but I want to keep healthy, and I firmly believe that being healthy is not contingent on being thin.
post #7 of 64

 

Name: Jennifer
If pregnant, EDD: 7/11
Size and/or weight (if you want to share): 18-20; 245 pounds
Time TTC: 3 months
Other children? no
 
Hi everyone! I'm 35 and pregnant with my first. I've been fat all my life and was at a place where I wasn't all that worried about my weight before TTC, but I gradually started obsessing over my weight and health when I started having pregnancy appointments. I apologize for the long saga that follows... it's just nice to be with people who will hopefully understand or empathize with my experiences.
 
My midwife is of the opinion that I probably have chronic hypertension. (My blood pressure runs about 130/80; for example, on Saturday it was 108/80 and yesterday 129/76.) She referred me to a high-risk doc for this reason, and that appointment was really traumatic. I honestly expected to walk in there with a log of BP readings and have the doc say "OK, these are borderline/pre-hypertension, let's keep an eye on this, here are some dietary changes you can make, keep checking it at home and come back in x weeks so we can check on it." Instead she zeroed in on the 2 readings out of about 20 that were in the upper 130s/80 and said she agreed that I had chronic hypertension, then ordered an EKG and a glucose challenge test that I had done that same day. I was 12 weeks! (I haven't heard back about these tests yet, and it's been a couple of weeks, so I've been hoping/assuming the results were OK.) I was crying by the end of the appointment; luckily DH was there to support me. I think my midwife practice is going to dump me because of the BP issue, which is upsetting.
 
The high-risk doc also was really pushing me to see a dietitian because I had gained too much weight to date, but I am avoiding that so far because I have a history of binge eating, and anyone lecturing me about  my diet turns me into a ball of shame and self-hate instantly. I already feel incredibly guilty about how I eat, and anyway I'm not fat because I'm stupid about nutrition. I've always felt like pretty much every fat and thin person alike knows what they should and shouldn't be eating. I personally am fat partially because of genetics, but probably mostly because I like to eat, and food makes me feel better when nothing else does. This is not ideal, but honestly I've been struggling with it since I was about 10, and I'm just tired of every single day resolving to do better and every single day failing. At some point you want to just not worry about it for 5 minutes.
 
Here's the thing. I'm a proponent of HAES and healthy living, but I personally am really not fit and healthy. I hate my job, and that causes me a lot of stress. I try to eat fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and whole grains as much as possible (and do fairly well much of the time), but I won't turn down the occasional donut and I can't say my snacks consist of celery or kale chips most of the time. Basically I'd say I watch my diet about as much as an average to moderately health-conscious thin person, but when you're fat, every little "bad" choice gets blown up into a symbol of why you're a heart attack waiting to happen. I work out occasionally, but because of my job sucking my will to live (and probably also because I'm just out of the habit, and out of shape enough that it doesn't feel good like it used to), I struggle to get to the gym more than once a week these days. There are weeks when I don't go at all. Starting in 2006, I lost over 100 pounds on Weight Watchers; I've since gained back about 70. In my thinner (not thin... I was still BMI-overweight even at my most fit) days, I ran 30+ miles a week and did a couple of half marathons. Even at near what I weigh now this summer, I was still running occasionally, but now it's a struggle to get myself to do anything at all.
 
All of this to say that I'm in this weird limbo where I've never been a model fit fat person, and there are definitely things I'd like to improve; but at the same time I don't feel like my lifestyle is that terrible either, and I wish I could just cut myself a break. I realize this may not be a very productive opinion, but right now I think I would benefit most from just finding a way to stop obsessing and beating myself up over my weight and blood pressure. I can only do the best I can, so adding worry and stress to the equation can't be helping. I've heard a lot of fat people speak about the frustration of eating basically a perfect diet and still not being able to lose weight, and I have a lot of shame over that because I can, physically, lose weight. I just seem to have the least willpower of anyone I've ever met, and every time I resolve to do better in one way or another, I always fail. I'm so tired of feeling like a worthless slob.
 
Wow! I know I sound like a total disaster in this post, but I just wanted to be honest about what I am feeling and struggling with right now. Thanks for listening.
post #8 of 64
Quote:
Originally Posted by scowgirl View Post
 
All of this to say that I'm in this weird limbo where I've never been a model fit fat person, and there are definitely things I'd like to improve; but at the same time I don't feel like my lifestyle is that terrible either, and I wish I could just cut myself a break. I realize this may not be a very productive opinion, but right now I think I would benefit most from just finding a way to stop obsessing and beating myself up over my weight and blood pressure. I can only do the best I can, so adding worry and stress to the equation can't be helping.


hug2.gif

 

I'm not sure any of us could straight up say that there aren't things about ourselves we'd like to improve (health, diet, fitness, attitude, self-esteem, etc.).  I sure know I can't say that.  A lot of what you had to say really resonated with me.  I do tend towards a more "fit" fat person (genetics more than anything), but I've never been all *that* fit.  In part because I just don't like exercise - there are a million and one things I'd rather be doing.  Chief among them is cooking.  Which is a huge contributor to my weight problem.  And you're right, I know what I should be eating, but as the empty box of Sees candy in my drawer (that I bought a week ago) will attest, I don't always follow that.  I'm a person who has very little will power, and the only way for me to control my eating is to (rigidly) control what food is in the house.  And when I was working at a company that constantly had food lying around the lunch room, I could only control myself for so long. 

 

Right now I have too much time on my hands - and WF is too close.  It's the closest thing to walk to, by far.  So we take a walk and wind up in WF, spending money we don't need to to buy food we shouldn't be eating.  Or else I stay at home and get no exercise, and only eat what's in the house.  Lousy trade-off.  And unfortunately my DH is an enabler when it comes to food.  Not sure I'd be any happier if he wasn't - since I don't like having someone tell me what to do, but it makes life difficult when we both need to be losing some weight (me far more than him - he at least gets daily exercise). 

 

As for high BP/hypertension, I would suggest a second opinion.  Just because this is the doc your MW sent you to doesn't mean that doc has the final say in anything.  I'd also discuss with your MW what her comfort level is with your BP.  And I'd also make sure she's using an appropriately sized cuff on you.  A too small cuff actually causes a high reading.  Or you can ask them to use a standard size cuff and take the reading at your wrist instead of your upper arm.  It's just as accurate, but less painful for those of us with extra padding on the upper arm.  Since you said you had a log, are you taking it yourself at home?  Is your cuff appropriately sized?  If these aren't your home readings, is it possible you have white coat hypertension?  And stressing over it is of course only going to make it worse. 

 

And the dietitian - I don't even go there.  I know far more about my body and how it relates to food than any dietitian does.  I don't need the emotional reaction I'm going to have to someone trying to get me to eat based on the USDA food pyramid (which is a load of crap, IMO).  In my first pg the NP kept trying to get me to go, because like you said, us fat people don't have the slightest clue how to eat - we need someone else to tell us.  rolleyes.gif

 

As for the binge eating/emotional issues, I can't see any good that will come from seeing someone who's going to shame you.  The only thing I can think of is finding a therapist who has extensive experience with eating disorders and see if that might help, because you obviously feel the need for a safe place to talk.  hug.gif

 

 

 

 

When I was interviewing MWs with my DS, I actually interviewed one (and talked to another on the phone) who were fat-phobic.  And it really shocked me because of all places I didn't expect to find it, that was it.  The disgust and contempt that MW had for me was apparent in her attitude, and in the fact that when asking about the GTT, she stated that it was a requirement for her practice (none of the other MWs I've interviewed in 3 pregnancies have had a problem with using a glucometer instead).  That attitude was a big part of the reason why I went looking for a HBMW to begin with - I was sick of the disdain from medical professionals, and it really blind-sided me to find that in a MW.  But I have had to come to realize that it really is a prevailing attitude in our society.  Because fat is the last "safe" prejudice.  It's interesting, because I've been reading blogs lately about mysogeny and female prejudice as well as intellectual prejudice, and had to realize that I've never really had to deal with either one, because fat prejudice takes precedence over all of them.  I've had to deal with fat prejudice my entire life, I've been surrounded by it.  And so many times that means that I never get to the point where I had to deal with mysogeny.  And I've never had to deal with intellectual prejudice because of it either - everyone assumes that I'm too stupid to worry about.  It's interesting to realize how different that makes my experience of life than everyone else around me. 

post #9 of 64
Thread Starter 

Really enjoying all the honest and soul searching talk, reading with interest.

 

For now, though, I just want to know if you guys like our new picture? :)

post #10 of 64
Love the picture boots! That's awesome smile.gif

scowgirl - I'm totally with you on almost everything there. Especially the note about how every single mistake we make in our food seems so much more critical than it would be for a thin or fit person. I eat quite well the vast majority of the time, I plan healthy meals and I stick to them, and I try not to keep junk food in the house. But seriously, I even think about a chocolate bar or a bag of chips and I just gain all that weight back. And then I feel like a failure anyways so I just go right ahead and binge, because I've already screwed up, so why not?

cristeen - Oh ya, the Canadian Food Guide is a big load of garbage too!

I actually went and saw a dietician about 2 years ago, before TTC, because my doctor wanted me to so I thought I'd humour her. Oh man, that didn't go well. It was a group thing in an auditiorium and the dietician and I ended up fighting for the first half of the lecture, then I just gave up and read a book for the rest of the time. Sorry, if she didn't believe that what goes into our food is important (like grass fed meat versus grain/hormone pumped up meat) than I didn't think she should be teaching ANYONE about food and healthy eating!

My bad midwife wanted me to go to a nutritionist as well and I flat out refused. I know what I shouldn't eat, I simply choose to eat it anyways. So there's not much they can do for me smile.gif
post #11 of 64

cristeen--Thank you so much for the hugs and support, and suggestions about blood pressure--I really appreciate it. Unfortunately the doctor's office did use the large cuff last time, and the measurement was still 136/80. So I think there is something going on there, but I just don't know yet if it rises to the level of needing medication (nobody has recommended anything to me one way or the other yet). It's a tough decision. I don't want to hurt the baby.

 

Your comments about fatphobia are really interesting. I have experienced that too. People address me in a much more condescending way when I'm fatter (or just pretend I don't exist), and treat me more like a regular person when I'm thinner. I'm not sure if it's better or worse that I have experienced both and know for sure it's not in my head.

 

bootsvalentine--I love it! It's awesome!

 

LivingSky--I really admire your attitude and approach. I wanted to say that you have really helped me a lot since I've been on MDC. So thank you.

 

OK, I will stop derailing the Introduction thread now :) Thanks everyone.

post #12 of 64

hi everyone!!

 

 

Name: kristen

If pregnant, EDD: 5/27

Size and/or weight (if you want to share): 18-20

Time TTC: we weren't REALLY trying, but we conceived on our first sorta-try...

Other children? nope.

 

i'm excited to be posting here! i am a long-time internet buddy of poster eleuthia. i'm 20 wks along with my first baby, and although i have good, supportive, and non-judgemental healthcare now, finding that type of healthcare has been a lifelong struggle as a lifelong chubster. in fact, one of my last PCPs suddenly got very judgemental about my weight (after seeing her for a couple of years, even!) and when she couldn't find anything "wrong" with me (good blood pressure, low cholesterol, fairly active, etc.) she asked me if i was on BCP. i told her no, i never had been, and then she said "have you ever been pregnant?" i answered no, and she said, "HMM, WELL THEN WE'LL HAVE TO FIGURE OUT WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU." now, i am no dummy, i know that larger ladies can have fertility issues, but suddenly my hyper-vigilance in birth control was under scrutiny because of my fatness?? that was the last time i saw that doctor. i dream about seeing her on the street, pointing to my belly, and yelling "FIRST TRY! EAT MY SHORTS!"

 

i also interviewed a midwife at 8wks who basically told me to go on a diet and said things like "if there was ever a time for celery and carrot sticks, it's now!!" and "NO JUICE, EVER." i am still angry with myself for not standing up for myself right then, but as soon as those words came out of her mouth i knew i would not be continuing with her, so i got out of there as quickly as possible. 

 

anyway, my pregnancy has been ok so far. i had a rough time wks 6 through 13/14 and was pretty miserable. sick, tired, depressed, everything. since then i've been feeling better and wayyy more positive and excited. i feel like my eating is more regular, natural, and un-"disordered" than it has been in years. i'm just eating what i feel like eating and what i feel like i need to eat. it's been really freeing for me. i also feel like i'm starting to LOOK pregnant, which is cool. i will try to post a belly pic on the belly thread soon.

 

post #13 of 64
Quote:
Originally Posted by grizzlebee View Post

If pregnant, EDD: 5/27

 

You should come join us in the May DDC!  Lots of great pg discussion with other mamas due the same month. 

 

Let me know if you need a link. 

post #14 of 64

thank you cristeen! i have been posting a little tiny bit there too. :)

post #15 of 64

Name: Lisa 

If pregnant, EDD: No clue.  Sometime Late June - Early August.  Needless to say, there is some discrepancy.

Size and/or weight (if you want to share): Um, have a bought clothes in the last 10 years?  I would say 22-24 pre-preggo

Time TTC: 0 months.  It happens fast for us

Other children? 2.  DS1 6/15/2004  DD1 8/23/2008

 

I have actually lost weight this trimester.  With the horrendous morning sickness, I have been exercising almost every single day (step, zumba, elliptical). My midwife says I will make up for it - which I am sure I will - but it's nice with looser clothes for the moment - taken up by belly of course.

 

I have always had homebirths and have had no issues with midwives or otherwise.  Today, was my first midwife appointment (finally).  I am supposed to be 11.5 weeks, and she was very surprised that my uterus was measuring 16 weeks. 

 

WHOA!

 

She did suggest that I take a supplement of calcium, which I will also share with you guys.  Studies have shown that 1000 mg of calcium a day reduce the risks of pre-E and high blood pressure by 50%.  She suggested that I get the liquid calcium as it is more readily absorbed.  Just look at your prenatal, and make up the difference with the supplement.  Right now, I have no problems with my blood pressure, but it is always good to ensure that it stays low.  I am sure that my exercise will help.

 

I was very happy to see this thread.  Now, I have the courage to actually leave a belly picture!

 

Horray!

post #16 of 64

Name: Bel

If pregnant, EDD: 06/07/12

Size and/or weight (if you want to share): 14ish

Time TTC: 20 months.  Needed help though.  

Other children? no

 

Hello ladies!  I have been a big girl all my life and as cute as my family thought it was, fatso isn't a very cute nickname when you're a kid.  Thanks for sharing your stories.  TTC took awhile and of course the RE recommended weight loss.  Heart disease runs in my family so I've always tried being healthy, so I pretty much am always dieting (but really prefer to call it eating healthy). Anyway, after getting some help I am expecting my first two babies in June.  Yep...its twins!  I am excited and nervous, but love have MDC around for support.  So glad this thread is up!  THANK YOU to the ladies that started it!

 

I love the pic as well!

post #17 of 64

hi kristen grizzlebee!!! 

and i'm so glad to meet everyone else! 

post #18 of 64

Name: Poppy/Bonniejean

If pregnant, EDD: 5/11/12

Size and/or weight (if you want to share): 210/size 16 or 18

Time TTC: 3 months

Other children? no

 

This board is great! I LOVE the Wonder Woman picture!

 

Although I've always been larger, I was the largest I've ever been before getting pregnant. Regardless of my size my wonderful mother blessed me with an amazing self esteem and (I feel) I've always presented myself as a confident woman.

 

Sadly, things have changed. This pregnancy has brought with it acne for the first time in my life, 25 extra pounds so far, much wider hips (hard time fitting into chairs!), thin and dull hair and I feel absolutely horrible. I hate looking at myself in pictures and I just feel fat and ugly. This is hard for me on so many fronts. Not only do I feel horrible about myself, I feel horrible about feeling horrible! AAAAGHHHH! So frustrating and no fun!

 

Thanks for letting me vent. :)

post #19 of 64

Name: Beth

If pregnant, EDD: February 29th 2012

Size and/or weight 22ish? but I like my clothes larger so I am not really sure what that number equates to

Time TTC: oh lord....forever? ended up with IVF and got lucky with a sticky pregnancy on the second try 

Other children? a two and a half year old daughter that my wife gave birth to

 

 

Am I ever pleased to see a group for this! My family pretty much produces two body types; tall thin women with no breasts to speak of and short fat girls with curly hair. I got type two. As soon as my aunt was diagnosed with PCOS ten years ago I knew I must have it too. Even on metformin my cycles have been getting worse and worse since I was in college, by the time we were trying for this babe I could go six months without a period. All together, this is my sixth pregnancy and the only one to make it past six weeks. I am very, very grateful that we live in Massachusetts where fertility treatment is covered by insurance; I don't know what I would have done without my awesome clinic.

Now we're just waiting on this baby to get here. My biggest concern is that my PCOS is going to run breastfeeding off in the ditch. I have been super surprised this whole pregnancy by how happy I have been with my body and my appearance. I haven't worn this many fitted shirts in years.

post #20 of 64

Name: lifeguard

If pregnant, EDD: n/a

Size and/or weight (if you want to share): 20ish / 220lbs

Time TTC: 6 years for ds, 9 months for dd 

Other children? ds - 3 years, dd - 3 months

 

It took us 6 years to conceive ds. The first couple we were just "seeing what happens", then I started to get worried but between dh's work travel & my depression it wasn't completely a surprise we hadn't conceived. Then I was really worried but so scared of being told to lose weight before they would help that I wouldn't even go to the doctor to ask for help. Starting doing a lot of charting & reading before I finally got up the guts to ask my doctor. Turns out I have pcos (which also I believe explains all the years of depression) & wasn't ovulating on my own. I started metformin right away but had to wait almost a year to get in to the specialist, by then we were in the process of moving to another country & had to put things on hold after just doing the basic testing. When we got to our new location (Costa Rica) I found a doctor right away who accepted the testing we had already done & immediately started me on clomid. I conceived ds on our first clomid cycle.

 

After ds I didn't get my cycles back until 18 months at which point we actually induced them. We did 6 clomid cycles in 9 months with no luck & then on a break cycle (a year ago in fact) before switching to clomid & femara together we conceived (we believe the 3 back to back cycles we had just done had something to do with this).

 

My pregnancies seem to go very well except that with both I have had gestational diabetes for which I've had to use insulin to keep my blood sugars within range even with very strict eating.

 

I am currently 3 months postpartum & am planning to spend this year really focussing on keeping my diet clean (we are working with a nutritionist) & hopefully will get to my goal weight before ttc again.

 

I work out very regularly & am in probably at the best fitness level of my life. I compete in powerlifting & getting my weight down would help me in competition as the weight you lift is put into a calculation along with your body weight so my high body weight works against me. It would also just be really nice to look as fit as I am.

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