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Chat thread: January 10-16 - Page 2

post #21 of 73

OMG!!! Craziness here!!! I had everyone dressed and ready to go to church, got all the kids and all the bags (Even my purse) out the door and locked it....my KEYS were in the house!!!! And DH was in another state with no cell phone!!! Thankfully my neighbors were home and then men broke into my other door while the kids and baby and I visited with their wife/mother inside the toasty warm house (because of course its like 40 degrees and pouring down rain with puddles everywhere tonight!) Ahhh...so glad the ONLY neighbors I know (we've only lived here a couple months) were home to help!!! Now I jsut need to ocme up with a ncie thank you for them!

post #22 of 73
Thread Starter 

Eep! Glad there was someone who could help, for sure!

 

@cwill... I totally feel ya. It's especially hard when you know you're supposed to be glad for the visit but all you really wanna do is stay in bed with the baby all day! ;)

 

So I keep waffling on something and I thought I'd get some thoughts from you guys. Fridays are going to be a long day at school for me: I have classes from 9:30am-7:30pm, with two good-sized breaks between classes. Eli will be away from me all day =( so it is a full day of pumping for me (....yay). Here's where I'm getting stuck: I can't decide if it would be better to drag all my crap in and pump in one of the on-campus lactation rooms (in a nearby building), or leave most of my crap in the car and walk back there to pump. Pros/cons (LOL I can make a table!):

 

  Pros Cons
Drag crap in with me

--Can use comfortable, nearby lactation rooms

--Access to bathrooms and WiFi so I can use the laptop during my break

 

--I'd be hauling a wheeled backpack with three textbooks and a laptop, a cooler with food for the day, and the Medela PISA bag. Ouch!
Leave crap in car --Get to leave majority of crap in car! (Would only have to carry the wheeled bag for class, and only one textbook at a time)

--Have to walk back to parking garage to pump (about 10m walk each way; my shortest break is one hour) - potentially miserable in bad weather

--Will be awkwardly on display in the parking garage (especially if I have to run the heat if it's cold, as everybody will stop to look in my car to see if I'll be vacating the parking space)

 

 

I really wish I could leave the pump bag & food cooler in the lactation room, but unfortunately that's not an option. So, given these options, what would you do?

post #23 of 73
Lilmomma, wow, good thing for neighbors breaking in the house for you!

Aeterna, I vote for the lactation room, much more comfy. Love the table!

Mamas, my baby is making me sad. Well, first what makes me happy: he's so good at sleeping at night! We spend about 10 hours in bed, with him waking every two hours to nurse, get changed and go right back to sleep. Wonderful! But the daytimes are tough for him. He only sleeps a few times for maybe a half hour, and the rest of the day, he's crying, the last few days anyway. He desperately wants to suck constantly at the breast, but he gets frustrated that the milk still flows, or he'll fill his tummy much and be sick, so we try to get him by on pacifiers and our pinky fingers, but he's not really happy with either. He's pretty much always in arms, we try as many different holds as exist, in the wrap, out of it, swaddles. He's pooping and peeing tons and getting changed right away, and he seems healthy in every way. Poor baby, stop crying please!

My DH is so wonderful, though. He hugged me today and said, "I know its hard when he's like this, but dint think that you're failing him in any way. You're a wonderful mother to him, love." How well he knows me.
post #24 of 73

Azadehhast~ my DS was like that, and it's so tough! Sometimes they just need to cry and you can't make them stop... just try to think of it as he's airing his concerns. Just go through the motions... feed, burp, change, sing to him, etc and try not to worry too much. It could be a growth spurt and he'll settle in a day or two, or he could just be very good at getting his needs met.

 

Babies that take more when they're little, give more when they're big... someone told me this and it became my mantra.... and it's totally true. I've had tons of compliments about DS on how he's so patient and kind with little kids. He came inside once on the verge of tears because the neighbours had left their dog tied up outside and it had become tangled in it's leash. DS had tried to help the dog but couldn't and he was so upset because he was thinking about how the dog must feel. A few weeks ago, DD1 called me from the top of the stairs and before I could answer he shooshed her and said "Mummy's sleeping!" (well,I was trying to) and DD told him she wanted... whatever, I can't remember... and he was like "That can wait, she's really tired, she hasn't slept for like four whole days, think of what she feels like!" (Yeah... I told him later that I'd heard that and thanked him and he was like "You're welcome, can I play Minecraft?" I said "You sure know how to pick your moment, don't you?" and he was like "Yep!") Another time, he was at my moms and she was thinking up jobs for him to do and paying him $2. She thought up a third job and when she went to pay him, she didn't have any loonies left so she just scooped all the change out of her wallet and gave it to him. He went off to count it, but a few minutes later he came back with ALL the money he earned and tried to give it back to her... he thought he'd cleaned her out! She had to explain to him about bank accounts and convince him that she wasn't really broke before he'd accept the money... anyway, I'm rambling, but I wouldn't change my high needs baby for the world, they are something really special.

post #25 of 73

Aeterna- I would feel it out...maybe on the coldest days bring everything with you and on the less cold days walking back and forth? Try one way this week and another way next week and then decide? Lactation room does sound nice, but, I hate carrying stuff everywhere. That said, I did carry al my stuff around when I was pumping and going to school. What if you got one of those BIG rolling bags and put everything in there?

 

Azadehhast- we had to watch this silly video in the hospital, but, the whole idea of it is that crying supposedly increases all the way until about 6 weeks of age and then starts to decrease. I'm not sure if that is true - but worth believing, right? N is not a very fussy baby at all compared to my first 2 - but even she has been crying much more the past week or two. *hugs* its so hard when we cannot comfort them! Oh, sometimes N cries when she is overwhelmed and tired I think...she will calm right down if we cut the lights crawl in bed and nurse her completly underneath the covers...she actually then goes to sleep! With my boys it sometimes helped to walk them with them hanging over our arm face down.

 

A local LLL leader came over just now and gave us latch bootcamp lol - I must have latched and re-latched N a million times, but, I think I'm figuring out how to get her latched better. She Helped me figure out how to do a football hold also which is a little harder, but, easier to see her face an how well she is on and also gave my tips of how to tell when N "loses" the ltach (slides off a little) during nursing. She said about 3 days of hard work every feeding will hopefully teach N what to do...I hope so!!

 

Also N passed her hearing test today...what a relief!!! 3rd's the charm! It was seriously nerve rackign though because her ear that passed the first 2 tests passed right away today and then her ear that had failed the first 2 tests had to be re-tested several times today and I got so nervous...turned out N's ears are so small the earpiece was falling out so the results were inacurate during the first few tries. So glad that's over!

 

 

post #26 of 73
Quote:
Originally Posted by LilMomma83 View Post

Aeterna- I would feel it out...maybe on the coldest days bring everything with you and on the less cold days walking back and forth? Try one way this week and another way next week and then decide? Lactation room does sound nice, but, I hate carrying stuff everywhere. That said, I did carry al my stuff around when I was pumping and going to school. What if you got one of those BIG rolling bags and put everything in there?

 

Azadehhast- we had to watch this silly video in the hospital, but, the whole idea of it is that crying supposedly increases all the way until about 6 weeks of age and then starts to decrease. I'm not sure if that is true - but worth believing, right?

 

With my boys it sometimes helped to walk them with them hanging over our arm face down.

I'd see about a bigger rolling bag as well. Sure it's a bit bulky, but it would be easier than separate bags. But my vote would be the room. I hate the idea of pumping/feeding in the car. 

 

Azadehhast- DD is the same. Some days I just sit there looking at her wondering what we got ourselves into. She sleeps at night from about midnight until 10am, only waking every 2-4 hours. But during the day... she only naps about 20 minutes at a time, and it takes half an hour to an hour to -get- her to sleep for that 20 minutes. It seems like if she's not nursing, she's crying, or we're frenzying around to try to soothe her. She very rarely will sit and just -be-. And from abour 8pm until 12, it doesn't matter, even if you are franticly trying to soothe her, she still just screams and screams, nothing makes a difference. And she's the same with nursing-- she wants to nurse alllll the time, but then she eats so much she throws eveything up (and she's got reflux, so she gets a nice dose of acid too), and then she's even more angry. Pacis will work for a while just while I get my wits together enough to nurse her again, but she won't take them long term.

 

It gets tiring, especially since you feel like you never stop. There's never a downtime, because you're always holding them, or walking and rocking. Mostly I just miss sitting quietly without someone on my lap. Even just an hour would be nice. I honestly don't remember that last time that I was able to sit by myself for an hour without crying in the background. 

 

She's 6 weeks right now, so hopefully that's true and it will decrease now!  And like she said, the face down thing does calm her almost all the time. She won't fall asleep like that, but if I just need some time when she's not screaming, it works for a bit. 

 

Mummoth-- those stories give me hope. Thank you :) 

post #27 of 73

aeterna, I'd probably haul everything.  That's nice that they have lactation rooms for you.  I don't think my uni does...

 

Mummoth, your son sounds like a special little dude.  I hope DS grows up to be just as empathetic.  Though with me as his mom, it's not likely.  ;)

 

DS is awake more and more these days too and is fussy about 50% of the time he's awake.  I think it's a combo of gassiness and just not knowing what to do with himself besides nurse.  Walking outside in a wrap or not is the #1 thing that helps him.  Singing or reading while bouncing often helps.  Upside down on arm while swinging back and forth.  Sometimes being put down so he can really truly stretch and move, I can usually distract him for a little while with a black and white image...  Oh, and if he's really intent on nursing, but it's obvious he's about to explode if he has anymore, then DH just needs to take him.  Because he'll never settle with me.  I don't generally worry about trying to get him to sleep though.  I just want him to not be bored/not uncomfortable.  He's only been obviously overtired a couple of times and in both cases a walk outside did the trick.

 

It's so much fun to have him awake and exploring the world.  But he's so young!  I find myself at a loss for what to do with him really.  I mean, I know I can sing and read, lay him on his stomach, tickle him, etc.  Even just let him be and take it all in.  It's just such an odd interaction at this stage.  He's so passive... unless he's hungry or wet or gassy, lol!

 

lilmomma, hope the football hold helps for you!  It's my least favorite, but it definitely makes things easy to see!

post #28 of 73

I'm beat! I just vacuumed, windexed and washed the inside of the car, so we can sell it. DH has been trying to get it done but has been getting a lot of hours at work. I didn't do a fantastic job but it's a lot better than it was. I want to get rid of it! DD2 slept in her stroller the whole time, DD1 helped me and DS stayed at the playground for a while after school. I should be making dinner, but I think I might declare it a 'fend for yourself' night.

 

I had mom feel Stephanie's soft spot today while she was visiting... it seems really big. There's sort of a line that comes almost to her forehead. Mom agreed that it does seem pretty big, but that she thinks it's when it's too small that there can be a problem. Does anyone know about this?

post #29 of 73

DD's is also very big and DEEP. Creeps me out, but none of the professionals that have seen it have said anything. I don't know about it being too big, but you're correct in that if it's too small that can be an issue. I babysat for a little boy that had to have surgery at 1 month to actually remove pieces of his skull so it was able to grow properly. I don't know the details, other than it was a very risky surgery, but my understanding is that he would have died without it, but I think the surgery was a 50% survival if I remember correctly. 

post #30 of 73

I'm so there with the lap thing! Lap and food...ANYTHING to myself!!!! My boys are being super clingy lately - I think they just feel left out because DD requires so much attention - I am pretty much feeding her, burping her, or changing her all day long and I *try* to do stuff with the boys but it just does not happen. I can't even take a shower by myself because DS2 will mess with the baby so I have to bring him in with me! I guess if I have to be optimistic about work, that is one thing nice...especialy because twice a week I work so early in the morning nobody really even talks to me!

 

I was kind of bummed a few minutes ago..my DH told me he went to the YMCA this morning (we had a family membership because I work there, though he also has privilages there because of his job) and he said that they had taken me off payroll and we no longer had my membership (so DH and I can still work out but it is $2/hr/kid for childcare and we don't get an employee or even a member discount on classes anymore). I'm so bummed! Nobody even told me! I have offered to work - they just don't need me when I am available! I think I am going to talk to my (former) boss there and see what we can work out...it would be worth it to me even if I have to give up Saturdays for a couple months or something to get the membership back and employee discount back (that's the biggest thing - its the only way we can afford soccer and swim lessons etc...which we are now going to miss a session of swim lessons) I would even work for FREE to get the benefits LOL.

 

Speaking of work I need to finish my assignments before going to bed, so I guess I better get started before DD wakes up - IF I can keep my eyes open!!

post #31 of 73
Quote:
Originally Posted by jeninejessica View Post

DD's is also very big and DEEP. Creeps me out, but none of the professionals that have seen it have said anything. I don't know about it being too big, but you're correct in that if it's too small that can be an issue. I babysat for a little boy that had to have surgery at 1 month to actually remove pieces of his skull so it was able to grow properly. I don't know the details, other than it was a very risky surgery, but my understanding is that he would have died without it, but I think the surgery was a 50% survival if I remember correctly. 


 

Oh wow, that's sad, that would be so agonizing to go through... but you babysat for him... so he was okay? DD's is deep, too. I have gotten very neurotic about the cupboard doors being closed because when I'm carrying her, her head is right at the same height as the bottom corner of them and I keep imagining her soft spot getting poked *shivers*

 

I failed at 'fend for yourself' night... I made the kids pancakes and DH sandwiches (he worked 11 hours today & didn't get lunch) and I don't know what I want to eat. Maybe a wrap with the leftover chicken, cheddar and lettuce... that sounds good. Stephanie's going to have nay-nays!

post #32 of 73

I still haven't started my work lol...this is horrible...I need to turn FB off my mom's (FB) group is blowing up and I can't stop posting to it lol...but some of it has to do with plans for tomorrow, so its ok, right?

 

I should have done pancakes for dinner too..made pasta/tuna salad and the kids spit it out and refused to eat dinner...oops...

 

I think I missed a couple posts directed at me a day or two ago too (pulled up the wrong page just now and read some older stuff) we are trying to get a referal for speech therapy tomorrow (I did not know you could call early intervention for a baby, so I will do that if I can't get a referal) and I think I may try bottle first some - she seems to be falling asleep even more today - I think I'm tiring her out with all the re-latching.

 

Did I mention earlier my nipples are feeling better? Maybe we did/do have thrush or maybe its just the positioning but they feel and look better than they have in a really long time (I've been forcing air time too despite the vasospasms).

 

And shoot - another FB notification for my mom's group is up so now I will be delayed again lol...serious procrastinating here! I just really really really hate scheduling. That's all it is!

post #33 of 73
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mummoth View Post

 

Oh wow, that's sad, that would be so agonizing to go through... but you babysat for him... so he was okay? DD's is deep, too. I have gotten very neurotic about the cupboard doors being closed because when I'm carrying her, her head is right at the same height as the bottom corner of them and I keep imagining her soft spot getting poked *shivers*


They were friends of the family, and I just remember being pretty terrified by the whole thing. I remember calling my mother the day of his surgery several times for updates. I can't imagine how his parents must have felt! But he did come through perfectly fine, and as far as I know, there wasn't really anything after that either. He healed from it, and they never really had to look back. His head for quite a while just looked like someone had imprinted a zipper across it though! 

 

I hear you on being nervous about the soft spot! A family member quipped one day "I don't know why they put the self destruct button in such a bad place!" lol and it's been an almost daily line ever since. I know 'they' say not to worry about it, and it's really heartier than we used to think, but it's still intimidating!

 

lilmomma-- good to hear about the bit of healing! When it gets that bad, every little improvement seems like SUCH a blessing!   and I know what you mean about being computer distracted. I feel like there's no time in the day, but then I realize I spend a great deal of it sitting here with DD in my lap, on the computer. I think sometimes I use her as an excuse why I can't get up and be productive. 

 

Oh-- and showers are like my -one- me thing. I get one every single day, and it's so nice to know I have 20 minutes to myself to look forward to, and it's the only time when I'm not actively listening for DD. Even when DH takes her during the day, I still find myself always on alert waiting for her to be passed back. 

 

Speaking of, I pumped enough yesterday and this morning so I had a full feeding for DD, and I nursed her, and then gave her to DH, and he didn't have to bring her back for I think it was like 3 hours. Or it seemed like it anyways. I got to cut, file and paint both my toenails and fingernails, play some of a game I downloaded, watch tv by myself, and then I even made dinner. It was soooo nice, and I feel so refreshed again. I'm hopeful for a good night tonight (ie no 3 hours of screaming) because she slept while she was with DH for like 1.5 hours, and then again deeply with me after that for an hour. She hasn't had good naps like that during the day in what seems like 2 weeks. And then we just ran a quick errand, so it broke her concentration, came home, nursed, and now she's falling asleep on my lap, and I'm going to try to put her to bed after that. I have hope there will be no big screaming! 

 

post #34 of 73

This is so not "AP" but whatever:  I have 2 bouncy seats and when the babies get fussy and they have had their diapers changed, have eaten, and I am starving or just want to sit without holding a baby they go into the chair and I jiggle it until he/she falls asleep.  Sometimes I put them in a car seat and rock that back and forth.  Sometimes I have two bouncy seats going at the same time.

post #35 of 73

AP or not, I would totally do that if she didn't shriek everytime we put her down in it. We're trying a swing next, to see if the motion will help. 

 

I don't even mind if I still have to sit there playing with her. I just want to have my arms and lap free for a second! lol

 

DD DID have a good evening last night. It was so miraculous It made me feel so hopeful! She fell asleep at about 11pm after nursing, and we'd been out, so she wasn't screaming beforehand. DH and I had a chance to have a really good long serious tlak from like 11pm until 130am. Then he went to bed, I finished on the computer and went to sleep at 2am. I put her in bed beside me, because I figured she'd be up in the next 30 minutes or so, but she slept until 3:30am! 4.5 hours, and that's including a move in location. Then she slept from 4 until 7, fed, etc, and then slept again until just after 9. She got up for the day, we changed her, fed, she puked everywhere, so we gave her a bath, and then played, and now she's napping again at 10:30! And it actually feels like a solid sleep! If I can somehow manage to keep her asleep for 90 minutes or so, I think we could have a good day on our hands! She just usually gets so overtired she doesn't know what to do with herself. 

 

AND, I pumped yesterday just before a feeding for 5 minutes or so, just to take some off the top because I was leaking all over the place, and then I pumped while she was feeding as well. Soooo awkward, but worth it. I got 3.5 ounces in the total of about 15 minutes. Usually in about 25-30 minutes I -might- get 2oz, but I feel like I'm fighting for every drop. I want to start building up a bit of a freezer stash, so I feel much better about this. There's been a couple times where I've been exhausted, and DH has offered to take her to his sisters and 'play' there for a few hours, so I can sleep uninterrupted, but I've never had enough milk to send with her, so we couldn't. If we get a few feedings worth in the freezer, then we can do that if I need. 

post #36 of 73

Umm, yeah, I totally use a bouncy seat too, and right now he's sleeping in the swing. So NICE! I still have to be close though, DD2 keeps trying to pick him up. She's a little fart, she needs constant supervision or she is getting into something or doing something she shouldn't be. It's exhausting. My nipples keep getting better too, I'm even hoping that tomorrow I can do a pumping session. I have about 4 oz in the freezer from before my nipples got sore, but I need like 40 oz before I go back to work.

post #37 of 73
It sounds like things are improving a bit for everyone!
We had a really great day yesterday. First, W and I walked 6 blocks, and I even felt good afterwards, not a ball of pain. (BTW on the pain, the naturopath recommended 3days of homeopathic bellis perenis, and that totally did the trick. After those three days, I was off the pain medicine and really able to function, and finally start feeling more like myself!). Baby slept, then we came home, he kep sleeping, woke, ate, pooped, and I put him on my back (yay us!) and washed the dishes and cleaned the kitchen!!! Yay yay yay, that felt so good. And W kept sleeping. When he was awake, he was happy and looking around and interacting, NOT constantly crying! Later, we got out the birth ball and bounced him on that, which he loved, and we ended the night with some friends dropping by with sushi. What a good day.

My left arm and shoulder are so strained and sore-- I really have to remember to bring baby to the breast, not hunch over for him. Ouch.

We just had our little walk, with him in the wrap on my chest. I stepped wrong and fell flat on my knees, one hand on the ground, one on baby's back--owie, I skinned my knee, but baby was so secure in the wrap, he didn't even change is sleepy breathing. Soooo glad I didn't break him!

Today my one goal is to knit him some warmer, bigger booties. His feet are so big, and I was really expecting a small baby, he nearly doesn't fit his booties anymore, but they're not warm enough for outside anyway, because when we come home, his little feet are cold.
post #38 of 73

Stephanoodle was up until 3:30 this morning, but we'd  had a few nights in a row of sleeping like a big baby before that, so it was okay. She got up for the big kids going to school and wasn't tired and hasn't had a good nap all day... she's asleep now but we'll be going to school in 45 minutes. I pumped a bottle, so I can take a nap this evening and DH can feed her. Or maybe he can feed her in the middle of the night, since it's FRIDAY and he doesn't work tomorrow!

 

Who cares if it's AP or not if it works?! DD2 loves her highchair... I pull her over to where I'm working and show her each veggie before I chop it, say the chop chop rhyme and let her smell them. She gets excited and flaps her arms like a bird when she smells things, LOL! 

post #39 of 73

We have a Sweetpeace swing and I LOVE that sucker!

Our last son slept in it for an average of 5 hours a day until he was 10 MONTHS old! About two, 2 hour naps a day, and another 1 hour nap each evening.

This time, I smartened up and bought the plug in version. (We burned the motor out of the last one.) I am about to hang up more black and white pages from another board book for Eli, where he can see them while in the swing. Check out the swing on Amazon. Pricey, but worth every dime. I would pay $300 for it in a heartbeat. ;)

 

I sling him while out and during the day when he is awake, nurse on demand and cosleep with my kids until they're 4-5 years old. I am TOTALLY okay with using a swing when they nap. It keeps me sane, saves my back and makes my babies happy!

post #40 of 73

DSB- LOL I love you :-) Naomi is in a bucket seat right now and her swing is right in front of me...sometimes I just can't baby wear all the time LOL...and she LIKES the swing and she sleeps better in the carseat than anywhere else!

 

We saw a 3rd LC and got some "answers" in regards to our breastfeeding dificult today! So encouraging! No tongue tie, no high pallet, but, a very odd tongue movement. So we are keeping our chiro appointment next week but we are also getting her assessed through our county's infant and toddler early intervention program...and if they feel she does need therapy it is totally free and they will come to our house! The frustrating news is that she nursed for probably an hour and only "gained" less than 1/2 an ounce..but at least we are working towards a solution. the LC also suggested baby girl may just be burning sooooo many calories with the constant longgggggg feedings that that is contributing to her weight gain issues some, so I am going to limit her to 10mins each side, bottle, and that's it..oh and so so so much pumping....light at the end of the tunnel though I think (LC said she has seen most babies respond well to the chiro and the OT; but, occasionaly seen some that don't)..so hopefully N will respond well. It's a good day though overall, and my husband just got way more supportive (I think him hearing a specific problem ratehr than just me saying something is "wrong" and bouncing around between different ideas of what it could be makes him realize there is an issue and it does need fixed).

 

Oh and my not proud mom moment? As I walked into the hospital today my 2yo suddenly ran ahead (I had 3 bags and a bucket seat with baby in it) right as a car caem around the corner..thankfully they saw him and stopped because I jsut couldn't get to him fast enough. (This was after he dumped a can of formula on his head and squirted shampoo all over his coat...he's on a roll lol).

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