I haven't posted here in a while, but it was such a source of sanity when my kids were younger!
Some of my frustration has to do with the amount of time I spend away from my kids and the lack of control that goes along with that. I work full time out of the home and am in my final year of a masters program, so I don't spend as much time with them as I wish I could.
When we spend time together, we do mostly active things; hiking, rowing, swimming, ... I limit the tv to a bare minimum. We listen to music that we all agree on. We eat a lot of fruits and veggies and healthy stuff. BUT when they are away from me, they hear the crap radio music (they know all the lyrics to Kesha from the bus rides, for example). They are exposed to a constant stream of junk food, and they aren't very active. The smaller amount of time I spend with them makes it harder to push against these tides, and often leads me to feel like I'm constantly nagging or complaining. My girls try to convince me to listen to the radio with them (but I can't stand it, really), to watch tv with them (I really hate the sitcoms), and beg me to take them out for fast food (which I never have and never will). They've recently become very anti-veggie (difficult for a mostly veg household). I worry that my pushback leads them to assume I'm out of touch more than it leads them to keep their minds open.
I'm especially worried about my 10 year old. She has gained quite a bit of weight in recent years, which is natural, because she's growing. I wouldn't be too concerned with how much she eats, but I am concerned, because she is so focused on the less healthy foods. I wouldn't mind her eating some junk, but primarily junk? Ugh! We don't really keep junk foods in the house, which seems to be an unending source of frustration for the kids, and then they focus on the least healthy of everything (e.g. eating the mac n cheese and rejecting the veggies, eating veggie chicken nuggets, but drowning them in a sauce, ...). The combination of the focus on less healthy food, the dramatic increase in appetite, and the increased rejection of all things active on her part worries me. She goes back and forth between being worried about her growing belly and feeling okay, because other kids in her class are also really big. She just had a dr appt, and she's in the normal limits, but very close to overweight. That worried her.
I've had lifelong issues with my weight. I was overweight as a kid. I was teased a lot for it, and I was very sedentary into adulthood. Since my kids have been born, I've discovered a love for being active. I now like to be active every chance I get, and I eat healthy, but I'm still overweight. I'm trying to focus on just being healthy and loving myself as I am, and I want to pass that on to my kids. But I feel like I'm sending mixed messages. One minute we talk about loving ourselves and our bodies, and the next I'm getting frustrated about more junk coming home in their backpacks or purchased by their dad. One minute I'm preparing a single scoop of ice cream for everyone, and the next I'm discovering a slew of candy wrappers and second guessing the wisdom of the ice cream.
I want to keep my kids rooted in nature, active, healthy. I try to tell them to drink water for thirst and juice or soda for taste or to eat healthy stuff for hunger and the other stuff for taste. But I have lived my life in a tangled web of nutritional and diet based rules and eating disorders. I don't want to pass that along. I don't want to be dismissed as a nag. But I don't want Kesha and candy to win out.
Any advice or words of wisdom?