Sex Post Baby - Page 5 « Back to Group Discussions

[jill the pill]

My DH had his vasectomy in October and we got the green light in December.  I thought we would be at it all the time but it is

so hard to find the time to be alone with him.   We still manage to find time for a quickie here and there and stick the kids

in front of the TV.  Jaimee, I haven't had any pain so I'm no help! 

[LunaLady]

Abra how on earth do you find kid free time on a bus to DTD 2-3 tines a week??

[Abraisme]

Originally Posted by LunaLady 

Abra how on earth do you find kid free time on a bus to DTD 2-3 tines a week??

Uhm.. It's all there is to do in the bus, heh. We have 2 beds, one in the front room. We put the kids to bed, turn on the loud fan (to cancel out noise) and.. Sometimes it's less often when we are visiting family and such.

[LunaLady]

Maybe if R was at the stage where I could just nurse him down and tuck him in and then have several hours before my bedtime we could try to do it more... I can't even imagine what that's like! Free time in the evening with my husband? What's that?!

[seraf]

I surely have no advice. I work evenings and the boys wake about 10 minutes after I get home.

[TalkToMeNow]

We get J down at 8 and he doesn't usually wake until 11 or later. BUT we have 6 people in 4 bedrooms... There is no privacy. So our biggest issue is finding a place to dtd. We really can only manage on the nights my dds are with their dad. So usually 1x a week when they are with us and 2-3x when they are not. I guess we average 2x a week. Sometimes less. It would def be more if we could ever have sex in our own bed and didn't have to plan out the logistics beforehand!!

[Abraisme]

I gotta say, we dtd with the baby in the room.

Coralie goes to bed at all different times, but will easily sleep alone after she's down.

[Autumnshades]

Not much action here either. First, can't leave Eli ... He follows us everywhere and cries when left alone. Hubby has been going to bed way early since he gets up early and Eli goes to bed late. Weekends is pretty much it when we sneak it in either at naps or after Eli for to bed.

[TalkToMeNow]

We would do it in our room despite J, but it will totally wake him up. He is a light sleeper.

[Jaimee]

Lubrication is not at all the issue.  Not only is cervical fluid present, but addition of lube made no difference. Dh wasn't rough at all, in fact, he tried something new- hardly moving at all and just letting me move- this increased pleasure for a bit, but did nothing to prevent the cheese grater issue.  And what about the bone aching?  This all sounds hormonal to me, but I don't know what to do about it!

[seraf]

Are you usually on top? I find I get achy-er when I am after not for a while. Not that it stops me. I figure I just stretched some new muscles and should do yoga.

I really don't know on the cheese grater thing. I read someone else mention it in another thread, but their solution was foreskin restoration and not remotely practical. Have you been tested for BV and yeast? Those can cause quite a bit of irritation, but if you have a mild infection you might only notice it after sex. I've had friends who had very long term issues with each of those. I think their husbands ultimately had to be treated as well. Randomly, when I eat dairy I get irritation in my digestive tract, like all the way down. At its worst, that irritation causes quite a bit of discomfort with and after sex, too.

[KayPea]

Still not much action here. Dd sleeps with us, and though we have done a little fooling around with her asleep in the next bed, there's no way we'd go all the way. There is a fold-out bed in the playroom, but we both find it weird to DTD when our roommate is home.

I had a return of sec drive last month, but now its gone. It was so weird. I haven't had a sex drive in over 4 years, so it felt like I wanted sex ALL THE TIME in comparison. Like it was almost too much.

[KayPea]

Oh, and Jaimee, while I have pain during intercourse, I don't have any good solutions. All the usual "lube, position, arousal" options never really worked for me. So we just put more emphasis on foreplay and manual/oral stim in our sex life.

[Jaimee]

Originally Posted by seraf 

Are you usually on top? I find I get achy-er when I am after not for a while. Not that it stops me. I figure I just stretched some new muscles and should do yoga.

No, not usually and it doesn't matter what position we use.  The bone aching is like a deep ache I associate with labor and menstruation- it's not out of shape muscles as I'm in decent shape.  I run regularly and stretch.  I think it's hormonal, but like I said I don't have a clue how to fix it.  No BV, but I suppose there could be a slight yeast issue... I just had a pap though and she didn't say anything.

[Jaimee]

Oh and thanks for the pic, Amanda!