How do you keep the house in order? - Page 2

[ziursrm]

Awesome ladies. I have 2 week old twins so I'm soaking up all the advice! Thankfully we have a ton of help right now but I know that won't last forever. So, I'm trying to envision a gameplan for the future. 

[jes h]

So, I am just trolling because we may have twin 8 month olds come live with us.

However, even before our DS was born or other kids moved in, DH and I did what we called the '10 Minute Hate'  (named after the 2 Minute Hate in 1984) It isn't the same thing at all (1984: 2 minutes of screaming, our house:  10 minutes of hated cleaning).  Having a silly name made it better, somehow.

We would set a timer for 10 minutes and then run all over the apartment, later the house, straightening up the mess.  Things didn't get cleaned (like real cleaning), but just put things back where they belonged.  When the timer goes off, we are done.  Whatever the place looks like.   With kids, there is ALWAYS something that needs to be put away, so I have had to get over wanting things all in their place.  But generally it looks pretty good; the timer motivates everyone to hurry & rush.   This is actually quite fun when we have older kids in the house who can participate.  With REALLY bad days, we may set it for 15 minutes or 20. 

Luckily we have a  small house (1060 sq. ft, 1 bath) so pretty much everything is sort of in the area it belongs, or it isn't far to the right area.

If I could spring for it, I would TOTALLY pay someone else to come in for the actual CLEANING once in a while.

Also, I only invite people over who will understand our crazy lives/house. Everyone else can chat on the phone/computer, can wait till I have a sitter and the $$ to meet outside the house, or can dwindle to acquaintance status...

[GPTwins08]

I organize everything so that the toys are all accessible but also kept with their parts and put away when not in use.
http://graham-and-parker.blogspot.com/2012/01/where-we-play-inside-play-enviornment.html

[little birds]

Our house was the worst when my twins were nursing very frequently, and has been a little easier since they weaned (a little past 2yo) I just didn't have the time. We have done some major decluttering, gotten rid of a ton of stuff, and I don't have a lot of toys out at a time. I am constantly donating toys and keep half of them in a closet and rotate them out from time to time. I try to do a quick clean up of the play area before / during nap time, and everywhere else before DH and I go to bed. I will not, however ever be able to keep up with the laundry. I just hate,hate,hate laundry, even if I did have the time, I wouldn't keep up with it (maybe we need to get rid of some clothes next).

[happy1nluv]

not a multi-mama, but ill take any house advice - and i figure you guys know better secrets out of necessity

anyway, just wanted to share my new laundry system thats actually sort of working...   every room gets its own hamper and all dirty clothes from the room owner(s) go in that hamper - and then each room gets a laundry day.  take out/wash dirties (i dont sort -- it hasnt ruined anything yet) - put back in tub and hand off to room owners (ds, 6 and ds, 4 share a room -- they sort whose is who and put away however they want, i help the 2yo put his clothes away...  but even when i get behind everyones clothes are already in their room and easy to find (i have 2 bins for each room that stack together unless they need a dirty/clean).  (4 and 6 yo were folding their own before we started this -- it only took a few times for them to learn to fold, altho they often dont).  i keep linens/towel seperate too...

[J's Mombee]

Originally Posted by little birds 

Our house was the worst when my twins were nursing very frequently, and has been a little easier since they weaned (a little past 2yo) I just didn't have the time. We have done some major decluttering, gotten rid of a ton of stuff, and I don't have a lot of toys out at a time. I am constantly donating toys and keep half of them in a closet and rotate them out from time to time. I try to do a quick clean up of the play area before / during nap time, and everywhere else before DH and I go to bed. I will not, however ever be able to keep up with the laundry. I just hate,hate,hate laundry, even if I did have the time, I wouldn't keep up with it (maybe we need to get rid of some clothes next).

Clothes have actually been a part of the decluttering, but I have had to talk DH into getting rid of outfits that he hasn't worn since I met him 12+ years ago :lol

Originally Posted by GPTwins08 

I organize everything so that the toys are all accessible but also kept with their parts and put away when not in use.
http://graham-and-parker.blogspot.com/2012/01/where-we-play-inside-play-enviornment.html

That spaces looks amazing.  Wow, I need a bigger house so that I could utilize that type of space, it looks awesome.

Originally Posted by happy1nluv 

not a multi-mama, but ill take any house advice - and i figure you guys know better secrets out of necessity

anyway, just wanted to share my new laundry system thats actually sort of working...   every room gets its own hamper and all dirty clothes from the room owner(s) go in that hamper - and then each room gets a laundry day.  take out/wash dirties (i dont sort -- it hasnt ruined anything yet) - put back in tub and hand off to room owners (ds, 6 and ds, 4 share a room -- they sort whose is who and put away however they want, i help the 2yo put his clothes away...  but even when i get behind everyones clothes are already in their room and easy to find (i have 2 bins for each room that stack together unless they need a dirty/clean).  (4 and 6 yo were folding their own before we started this -- it only took a few times for them to learn to fold, altho they often dont).  i keep linens/towel seperate too...

I love it.  I used to do all of the laundry at once, but I remembered that when DS1 was a baby he had his own laundry day and it was much easier.  I don't know why I hadn't thought of this again.  I had begun to have everyone use their own hampers, but wow individual laundry days... I expect it to do wonders for our laundry mountain.  Thank you for that idea :)

[SunshineH]

I don't have any really good advice, because this is still a struggle at our house.  Sounds like you have made some progress. :)  Things are easier than they were.  Some things you just don't get to like before.  Hang in there!

[J's Mombee]

Originally Posted by SunshineH 

I don't have any really good advice, because this is still a struggle at our house.  Sounds like you have made some progress. :)  Things are easier than they were.  Some things you just don't get to like before.  Hang in there!

Thank you, we are definitely making some progress.  I am also learning to brush aside some family member's comments.  I am getting more laundry done, but when my mom visited today, I hadn't put it away yet.  My mom commented to DS2 (9 months old) that I had too many things on the couch.  It stung a little, because I was really hoping that she would have noticed my progress thus far.  I am remembering that this progress that has been made has not been for my mom, it is for me, DH, and our children.  I am grateful for the progress that we have made, and I hope to be able to be stingless in the future when people make inconsiderate comments.  I am growing and I look forward to a cleaner house (baby steps are acceptable tho, :lol)

[mylilmonkeys]

I'm shocked she'd say something like that!  I can't keep the house neat to save my life.  It's not that I don't try.  But my MIL would never say anything, and if my mom were close enough to be around, she'd just pick stuff up and put it away (I may never find it again, but at least she'd try!)  I can't imagine living with/around people that would make comments like that.  Just because you're family, does not entitle anyone to be rude!  

[ziursrm]

Grh! This has always been a struggle for me. But I would have a hard time tolerating such passive aggressive comments. Just come out and say it directly to me, don't filter it through my kids. My mom will do that too and I've had enough finally. I would gently let her know that she can come by to help or she can come by and keep her comments to herself or she can skip coming by. Setting boundaries can be hard at first but well worth it in the long run. 

[Shuli]

I have never been the world's best housekeeper. Once, we went to a wedding and asked my MIL to come babysit. She came and instead of sleeping over as planned, she drove the 1.5 hours home. We then got a nasty e-mail about how her husband was furious with us for letting her drive home and that she had refused to stay in our house because it was a cesspool of germs and how can we live like that, but more importantly, how can our kids live like that? It was not a pleasant exchange and needless to say we have never asked her to come and babysit again. Sometimes people say terrible things thinking it will change the situation, but reality is that we are MoMs, and I'd rather spend time with my kids while they are little and acutally clean once a week than always be cleaning - which I would be.

We use bins for all the little toys like blocks, animals, cars and have pictures pasted on the box of what goes in them. Then we do what we call a "ten second tidy" when the kids run around like crazy and put all the toys away. We are usually directing and telling which child to put which toys away, but it is easier now then when they were little. Even the 2 year old gets involved and helps clean up. So the tidying does get easier as they get older and it helps to try and get them involved as soon as you think they can so the kids can help. We also have a rule that if you want another toy you have to put the first one away. This helps too.

Good luck and remember, they have no idea what it's like so people feel the need to comment. I have said back to people who have made comments like that to me "you're welcome anytime to help me clear up/put laundry away/do dishes if it bothers you so much". Either they stopped making comments or they helped, either way you get your needs met.

[Spring Lily]

GPTwins08 - what a great space you have, and so well organized! I wish we had such a big indoor play area.

The funny thing is that my kids could not handle a playspace like that--too many toys! My kids are "toy dumpers" and would have everything out at once. I could never keep a room clean like that. Part of keeping your house clean, I've learned, is learning what works best for your own kids. Can they handle having so many toy options at once, or not? I started out with everything neatly on shelves in containers, and finally figured out that I need to have only a FEW of those containers out at once. Most need to be stashed away and inaccessible to the kids. My kids have learned that they can have any toy they want, but they have to put their other stuff away before I will get something new out for them. This approach has made a drastic difference in the manageability of the mess around here.

We also have a "teamwork" mentality and tackle a room together. If one person was playing with something, I'll usually have them put it away, but overall we aren't worrying about who had what. Our family is a TEAM who take care of each other. So, sure you might not have been playing with your sister's dolls, but if I ask, you'll put them away. Just like she wasn't playing with your legos, but she's putting them away. We were getting into a lot of squabbles about who played with what and when, and it just felt really whiny and unproductive to me, so we've now switched to "it doesn't matter who had it, we're all picking up everything equally." I try to keep it fair, so if one person wasn't involved much in the mess, I don't require as much from them, or have them help me with something else after awhile. I don't know anyone else who approaches clean-up this way, but it has really smoothed things out and fostered a more communal mentality in the kids.

Originally Posted by happy1nluv 

anyway, just wanted to share my new laundry system thats actually sort of working...   every room gets its own hamper and all dirty clothes from the room owner(s) go in that hamper - and then each room gets a laundry day. 

This is similar to what I do, too. My ODD is 5 and able to sort and fold her own now, but when my twins were toddlers I started them helping me with the laundry. I sit on the bed or floor in their room pulling bit by bit from the clean hamper and as I make little piles (shirts here, pants here, etc) they come and pick up the little stacks and put them away in the correct drawers.

Now that they're 3 they like to try to help me fold, and I'm good with however they "fold" it (although I do try to teach them the regular way, too). I think it helping with laundry actually gives good pre-math skills. You've got categorizing (sorting), finding like objects (which drawers to put them in) and spatial orientation (folding).

[GPTwins08]

Originally Posted by J's Mombee 






 


That spaces looks amazing.  Wow, I need a bigger house so that I could utilize that type of space, it looks awesome.

Thanks!!

[GPTwins08]

Originally Posted by Spring Lily 

GPTwins08 - what a great space you have, and so well organized! I wish we had such a big indoor play area.
The funny thing is that my kids could not handle a playspace like that--too many toys! My kids are "toy dumpers" and would have everything out at once. I could never keep a room clean like that. Part of keeping your house clean, I've learned, is learning what works best for your own kids. Can they handle having so many toy options at once, or not? I started out with everything neatly on shelves in containers, and finally figured out that I need to have only a FEW of those containers out at once. Most need to be stashed away and inaccessible to the kids. My kids have learned that they can have any toy they want, but they have to put their other stuff away before I will get something new out for them. This approach has made a drastic difference in the manageability of the mess around here.
We also have a "teamwork" mentality and tackle a room together. If one person was playing with something, I'll usually have them put it away, but overall we aren't worrying about who had what. Our family is a TEAM who take care of each other. So, sure you might not have been playing with your sister's dolls, but if I ask, you'll put them away. Just like she wasn't playing with your legos, but she's putting them away. We were getting into a lot of squabbles about who played with what and when, and it just felt really whiny and unproductive to me, so we've now switched to "it doesn't matter who had it, we're all picking up everything equally." I try to keep it fair, so if one person wasn't involved much in the mess, I don't require as much from them, or have them help me with something else after awhile. I don't know anyone else who approaches clean-up this way, but it has really smoothed things out and fostered a more communal mentality in the kids.
This is similar to what I do, too. My ODD is 5 and able to sort and fold her own now, but when my twins were toddlers I started them helping me with the laundry. I sit on the bed or floor in their room pulling bit by bit from the clean hamper and as I make little piles (shirts here, pants here, etc) they come and pick up the little stacks and put them away in the correct drawers.
Now that they're 3 they like to try to help me fold, and I'm good with however they "fold" it (although I do try to teach them the regular way, too). I think it helping with laundry actually gives good pre-math skills. You've got categorizing (sorting), finding like objects (which drawers to put them in) and spatial orientation (folding).

Thanks! My kids are actually toy dumpers too. I had to really start a new system with them so that they could learn not to just go crazy and take everything out, dumping it all, and making a huge mess. Part of the process was making sure there was a designated space for every item. I also decided it was best to put labels on every one of my little storage boxes. That way even my older kids or husband would know what goes in what box. I asked everyone in my house to help keep watch that not more than 2 boxes were take off the shelves and in use at the same time.. we started as ONE box at a time. Whatever we got out was what they had to play with for a little bit, then after 15-20 minutes we could clean it up together, put it back and choose a new box to get out. I had to really buckle down on them with taking out a bunch of stuff at once. I also sorted the large toy chests. They go by type. One is for cars/vehicles. One is for stuffed animals. One os for misc random toys... etc. It takes a lot of talking and teaching. I finally had my twins out of the toy dumping/get everything out at once stage about 6 months ago. I was sick of the clutter, sick of no toys having their parts with them, sick of the cluttered toy mess, sick of it all!!!!!

[GPTwins08]

oh and one of my twins still likes to occasionally "clear a shelf with one hand" or push everything off a shelf just to be a butt head. etc. I stop him right in his tracks, and I tell him why it is not ok to do that. I make him pick the toys up. I help a little and make sure everything is nice and neat. Then I ask him nto to do that again. Then I ask him if he wants to play with the toys that he just push or swiped down all over the floor. If he says no.... I suggest another toy or ask him to go sit down for a few to take a breather.. just kind of unwind with a book for a few...

[GPTwins08]

Originally Posted by J's Mombee 



Clothes have actually been a part of the decluttering, but I have had to talk DH into getting rid of outfits that he hasn't worn since I met him 12+ years ago


 


That spaces looks amazing.  Wow, I need a bigger house so that I could utilize that type of space, it looks awesome.


I love it.  I used to do all of the laundry at once, but I remembered that when DS1 was a baby he had his own laundry day and it was much easier.  I don't know why I hadn't thought of this again.  I had begun to have everyone use their own hampers, but wow individual laundry days... I expect it to do wonders for our laundry mountain.  Thank you for that idea

Thanks so much!!