Co-sleeping and Dating

[mamatoemily]

How do people handle this?  I haven't had to deal with it just yet as I am currently living with my parents, but am moving out in April after buying my own house.  My DD is 14 months and sleeps with me.  I have been dating a wonderful man for 3 months and so far it hasn't even been an issue because of course I wouldn't have him sleep over at my parents (awkward!).  But, the time is coming when I am going to have to manage this.  I was planning to try and get her to sleep in her own bed after I move, but I realize that won't be an easy transition (or maybe it will...).  I feel guilty wanting to have my BF sleep over if it means "kicking" my DD out of bed...I feel a lot of conflicting things about it.  What have others done???

[Mom31]

My kids are way older .... and just now started sleeping in their own beds.  And my boyfriend I have only been dating for 3 months and would not have him spend the night. What we do so we can have an overnight is my ex keeps them once a week and i stay at his house.

What I would do is lay down with her in her big girl bed and see if she will go to sleep. I do wish I had gotten my kids in their beds sooner.

But- that does not mean she will stay there all night.... and I just don't know if I think sleeping in bed with a boyfriend is ok....  I would wait till its even more serious.  I just don't know- I am torn on this issue myself.

I know I have friends who have had boyfriends thru the years they lived with and slept in the bed all together with the kids.

If you are wanting to get her in her own bed start putting her there and lay with her or sit next to bed on the floor.

See what happens.

[SgtLilith]

I have very simliar thoughts...I think your little lady is too small but just in case it might work for you.  I have a 4 year old and 20m old.  When my 4 year old was 2 I put a twin mattress next to my queen for her and required her to stay in it to prepare for the new baby coming.  You can move the bed farther and farther....be sure to make it fun each time...ex new sheets, new stuffed animal etc.  14 months is young but its doesnt hurt to try it.  I have yet to even consider moving my 20m old out of my bed since he is still all night nursing...but I do think about it.  Good luck and congrats on the house!

[hillymum]

My son is 7 years old and thanks to sbx doing a real number on him he hasz real attachment issues. I can not get him out of my bed!!! We have finally got to the point where he will start the night in his own bed, but then he comes to mine within a few hours. I can not even think about my boyfriend staying the night when I have the kids. This weekend is the first time time bf and I have been together overnight in our 7 week relationship.

[Mom31]

and how did it go hillymum?

[hillymum]

I'm still at his place!

[mamatoemily]

Part of me thinks the transition won't be terrible because we co-sleep in a King bed and she isn't the type of kid who sleeps near or ON me...really, she sleeps on the other side, so maybe it won't be so bad?  I'm nervous about the transition, but it is still 3 months away at the EARLIEST and my BF is very understanding about the delicacy of the transition...even though he obviously wants to spend the night sleeping beside me.  

[DreamerMom]

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Edited by DreamerMom - 1/20/12 at 10:52am