Will toddler wean if I go out of town? - Page 3

[CatsCradle]

Originally Posted by Adaline'sMama 
I love how you define our generation of mothers as the "me time" generation. Are you aware of the fact that more mothers co sleeping (or sharing rooms with their children and breastfeeding their children than the women of your generation? Where exactly is the "me time" in all this? And where you do you get the "this generation of mothers" part? There are 45 year old moms on MDC that are TTC #1 and 21 year old moms of three here. The generational gaps are huge. There is no such thing as "this generation of mothers."
 

Thank you for mentioning that.  I'm one of the older moms here and I am technically a baby boomer, so my generation is more likely to comprise of grandmothers than first time moms.

That being said, I'm with the majority here that if this is what the OP needs, then go for it.  I say this as a WOH mom who extended breastfed my DD until she self-weaned at three.  At 18 months, my DD would have been fine for a night or two and my only concern would have been my own supply (which wasn't an issue since I pumped at work anyway).  My breastfeeding relationship certainly didn't end when I went to work, in fact it created a better connection with DD.  She learned to have great relationships with others, but through breastfeeding, our relationship was something special. 

[~Boudicca~]

Women needing time away from their children is a myth...

well, hot damn!  Why didn't anyone tell me!  I feel really guilty now for not wearing the baby in a sling on my back to our once a year anniversary dinner.  I definitely should have turned down the opportunity to go to all 3 of my best friends' bachelorette parties, because it could have ruined our nursing relationship.  And the opportunity to go on a mini-honeymoon for a couple days (I was pg and didn't want to travel far plus $$ was a big factor when we got married) to the mountains; surely I shouldn't have gone.  And I <gasp> worked too!

How we ever made it to nursing until she was 4 years old, I'll never know.  I pretty much threw the kid to the wolves.

Foreverinbluejeans, thank you for showing me the light.  Next kid, I'll be sure to never, ever leave them.  I can't go on with perpetuating this "alone time" myth any longer.

[motherlove99]

Wow, some interesting debate here....I am a SAHM who has been nursing two kids for the past 4.5 years, my second is 19 months old currently and I am returning to grad school in the fall to pursue my dream of becoming a conservation biologist--a dream I detoured from when I got pregnanct with my first and went on to home birth, extended BF, co-sleep, cloth diaper, babywear and all things AP. I am really excited to "do me" again. I truly am. But it is bittwersweet as I know the time away (and a 4 week internship studying great whites and whales and dolphins in South Africa) will probably spell the end of my breast feeding adventures. It is a very difficult reality to face, the end of an era really (although I hope he doesn't wean!) but through this thought process I am examining the value of "letting go", I do feel for some reason, that breastfeeding has become so important to me and I identify with it so much, that I am scared to let go of it out of fear of the unknown--life with my kiddos without the comfort of my breasts! This may start a new chapter in our relationships together for sure and I am nervous about embarking on that path...just thought I would share my thoughts and ideas about the breastfeeding elements of our mothering...I do believe we need to strike some sort of balance, I was a person before my children with big goals that I want to share with my children and inspire them with. I hope that if I sacrifice nursing for this other part of me that it will be well worth it. I did give them 5 years of my life, blood, sweat and tears. Learning to let go can be a challenge and a reward... 

[Mamja]

You should have just brought your baby to the bachelorette parties! What better way for a woman to get excited about her future married life and potential family than seeing how great it is to never leave your kids more than an hour, no matter what, until they're in high school! I'm sure she'd be SO excited to breastfeed.
 

Originally Posted by ~Boudicca~ 

Women needing time away from their children is a myth...

well, hot damn!  Why didn't anyone tell me!  I feel really guilty now for not wearing the baby in a sling on my back to our once a year anniversary dinner.  I definitely should have turned down the opportunity to go to all 3 of my best friends' bachelorette parties, because it could have ruined our nursing relationship.  And the opportunity to go on a mini-honeymoon for a couple days (I was pg and didn't want to travel far plus $$ was a big factor when we got married) to the mountains; surely I shouldn't have gone.  And I <gasp> worked too!

How we ever made it to nursing until she was 4 years old, I'll never know.  I pretty much threw the kid to the wolves.

Foreverinbluejeans, thank you for showing me the light.  Next kid, I'll be sure to never, ever leave them.  I can't go on with perpetuating this "alone time" myth any longer.

[Youngfrankenstein]

Originally Posted by Mamja 

You should have just brought your baby to the bachelorette parties! What better way for a woman to get excited about her future married life and potential family than seeing how great it is to never leave your kids more than an hour, no matter what, until they're in high school! I'm sure she'd be SO excited to breastfeed.
 

As Tina Fey mentions in her book;  according to Mothering Magazine, you shouldn't wean until the rehearsal dinner.....I see that following the same logic. :)

[Heather Lyn]

I'm not surprised that the one person on here who seems to think alone-time is a shameful, unnecessary luxury has adult children.

Here's a link that might help: http://forums.llli.org/showthread.php?99856-Trip-away-from-nursing-toddler

[Springshowers]

I had to be away from my daughter about that age for two days (giving birth). She nursed just fine after and it was like it never happened.

I have a pact with my sister that when my DS is 3 we will go away for a long weekend to a spa. He is just over 12 months and so independent I am wondering if I might to get to go when he is 2 instead!

I was getting stressed out of my mind last week.. sleep deprivation with nursing two was driving me insane. I read a Naomi Aldort article and started going to sleep with them by 9 (they go to sleep late) and not stressing about dishes etc. I am like a new person. So you might want to do that too!

I totally support a little mommy break though to just get your mind and body back a little more back to normal.

[andromedajulie]

Hi Ladies,

Since this thread was resurrected, I thought I'd post an update.

First of all, thanks to the overwhelming majority of you who spoke up for the importance of Mom's mental health and well being!

In August, shortly after my LO turned 2, I went away for a week with my sister. I was very nervous, despite the fact that DH has a very strong bond with her and is quite capable. I had a wonderful time. I slept. I was taken care of. After a few days, I realized I didn't have to hold it together to take care of anyone and so I could cry, and talk, and then start laughing. I could be myself, and start to think about my life and talk things through with my dearest friend. I'm perimenopausal here, so I have stuff going on too! It was great.

I pumped daily. Very little came out and I was prepared for the nursing to be a problem when I returned. But my LO jumped on that wagon the minute I got home and didn't miss a beat! She began nursing just as she had before. I am incredibly grateful mostly to my DH who took precious vacation time to stay home with her, but also to my inlaws who helped him at times he had to work. And she was a champ - she really learned at that point the lesson that "mommy always comes back!!!" and now she KNOWS it.

I'm back home and loving/hating the job as usual. I love my family and want to be around them most of the time. But I loved my chance to recharge my batteries, and I'm lucky that it was a positive experience for my LO and her daddy too.

Thanks everyone!

[crayfishgirl]

I haven't read any of the other posts, but I just went away for 2.5 nights for work and left my 18 month old with my husband.  He was all over booby when I got home yesterday.  I pumped ~4 times during the days I was gone, but did not pump at all during the night (he still nurses at night).  I still pump at work during the day, and did not get as much today as I typically do, but I'm assuming that's temporary.  Good luck.
 

ETA:  I just saw your response...so glad that everything worked out and that you're recharged!!