Termination of an absent fathers parental rights in Pennsylvania

[jinxy]

My exhusband has not seen or spoken to our 2 sons in over 3 years. They are 10 and 9 years old. He has moved and doesn't reply to phone calls, emails, letters or any form of communication. Our 10 year old has developed a cardiac issue and his cardiologist insists his father either give permission as well, or I get a full custody order. Given that I cannot get any information from the father and he has moved and I cannot get his address I cannot file normal custody papers since you must have the father's address to do so. I need to file to have his parental rights terminated, I think. I don't know how to do so, or where to go to do so. I cannot afford an attorney and legal aide says they don't have anyone that can help since it is not an emergency type of case or anything like that. What do I do?

[Cynthia Mosher]

Moving this to Single Parenting where it can get better input. 

[MariesMama]

Get a different doctor.  I've never had a doctor even question anything about DD's biological father.  I bring her in, I have her treated.  Find another doctor and don't mention anything about custody. 

And THEN start the process of having his rights terminated.  Does he pay support?  In many states the requirement for abandonment is a certain period of no contact AND no support.

[PoppyMama]

I have never had an issue having my kids seen but I did work for a specialist who wanted permission from both parents.  With her situation she is not likely to get into another specialist who will not know why they switched since they will need records.  Would this be an issue she could get an ex parte hearing for and do without a lawyer?

[Super~Single~Mama]

You do not need to terminate his rights. You can just file for sole legal custody. Go to the family court in your town, and talk to the clerk. Take all the documentation you have from contacting the father, state that you need an emergency order of sole legal custody since the doctor will not treat a heart condition without you having that.

You don't need a lawyer, it should be very straightforward.

Do not start the process of terminating rights, that is a much more complicated process, and many states do not allow it unless there is a step parent who wants to adopt the child(ren).

Good luck!!

[Mummoth]

Originally Posted by Super~Single~Mama 

You do not need to terminate his rights. You can just file for sole legal custody. Go to the family court in your town, and talk to the clerk. Take all the documentation you have from contacting the father, state that you need an emergency order of sole legal custody since the doctor will not treat a heart condition without you having that.
You don't need a lawyer, it should be very straightforward.
Do not start the process of terminating rights, that is a much more complicated process, and many states do not allow it unless there is a step parent who wants to adopt the child(ren).
Good luck!!

This. And if you DO need to have him served, ask for substitutional service... do you know anyone, someone in his family or one of his friends, who is likely to know where he lives now? If you know their address or workplace, bring that information with you when you go to court, too. Do you know what city your ex is living in? Another way to get substitutional service is to take out an ad in the paper in his area... it's a hassle, but once you jump through that hoop the judge will give you sole custody. But definitely go down to court and find out what's required of you, you might not have to do this where you are.

[Super~Single~Mama]

Alternatively, you could ask the judge to order you the "medical custodian" so that you can make medical decisions.

When you go in to court, regardless of the path you take, ask for an emergency order based on the need for treatment of the heart condition. The judge will likely give you a temporary order pending service and a follow up court date. A judge would not dare deny a child needed treatment for a heart condition (it just sounds serious).

[Satori]

I agree with the others, you just need to file for sole custody. A TPR, especially when you don't know where the father is takes time. I did one in CA and it took about 4 months and that was FAST. If I had known where to find him it still would have taken 6 weeks if I remember right, it was 7 years ago.