Our daughter came home at 6.5 weeks old after spending 1 week in NICU (she was a bit preemie) and the rest in our agency's nursery care.
She was a very difficult baby, cried all the time and extremely restless moving almost all the time. Turns out that she had reflux and milk/soy protein allergy that was making things worse. I mention this because it did affect our early time together and made it very difficult to feel like a happy family. Mostly we were all in survival mode.
She is now 2 weeks short of her 1st birthday, so she's been home for 10.5 months. She is much better but still a very intense high needs little person.
My 1st question is in terms of attachment. She has a very strong preference for me. I am a SAHM so i am with her all day, but even when my husband or her sisters come home, she still wants only me. If I am not holding her I have to be sitting down right next to her and she crawls all over me, on top of me. She is never more than a foot away. If I put her down or walk away she gets hysterical and follows me around truly screaming mama mama mama. Its nice to be loved, but I am worried that this is a little more than that, she seems so anxious when she is not on top of me. When my husband is home with her and I am not here, she is not like that at all and will sit and play with him and her sisters. She is a little bit like this with our dog (Carlos, but she calls him BOB) as well. She always wants to know where he is, always looking on the floor calling him and if he isn't near she yells for him to come. Its like she wants him in her field of vision at all times, but she doesn't cry and get anxious when he isn't around like she does with me. The dog thing is somewhat recent but she's been like that with me for a few months now.
My 2nd question is more of a general behavior one. She hits, bites, scratches. She'll look you in the face and claw at you, sometimes drawing blood. She isn't angry, excited, playful. I'll be holding her or giving her a bottle and she'll reach up and instead of touching my face she'll scratch it hard. She'll come in for a hug and bite my shoulder. She did this to my 6 yr old yesterday and left a big welt, and my poor 6 yr old was really upset. If you yell OUCH! or pull away, she just gives you this confused look. She has been doing that since she could really control her arms and since she got teeth. Admittedly, it does worry me a bit because my other daughter (who was also adopted as a newborn) was nothing like this. These seem more like older toddler behaviors, not behaviors appropriate for a small baby (starting around 6-7 months old... she started having full blown tantrums around 5-6 months old) I just wondered if anyone could shed some light on this and tell me what it could be and how to help!
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