or Connect
Mothering › Groups › August 2012 Birth Club › Discussions › Who will be coming to your birth?

Who will be coming to your birth? - Page 2

post #21 of 25
Originally Posted by Babymakesfour View Post

With DD last year, my sister and DH were my 'coaches' and we had our midwife. I laboured with DH at home alone until my sis got there, but she talked to me for about 10 minutes, then insisted she was 'so tired!' from driving an hour, and being that it was 1 am, so she had a nap in my room! She actually complained when I came in the room to get on the bed when the midwife finally decided to come over. The midwife walked in the door, assessed me, I was at 7 cm, we drove to the hospital and I delivered 45 min later. My sister had to leave the room to use the washroom and almost missed the birth. Later, she said, "I know you were in labour and everything, but I was so sick with a cold that day. I was exhausted!" Can you say, spoiled youngest child syndrome? I could have killed her. Oh, and my midwife was filling out paperwork while I was crowning, and finally knew it was serious when I started screaming. I pushed, like, three times before the baby came. My team, was uh, lacking to say the least. But, on a positive note, DH was sweet and tried to keep me focused and calm.

So, with this one, my sister actually asked me if she was going to be a part of the birth. I asked her if she could handle it, and then reminded her it seemed taxing last time. I said, I don't want you pushing yourself if it's inconvenient. She said she'd be more prepared this time. I still don't know if we'll 'accidentally' call her too late to make it thumb.gif.

Yeah I think you should wait just like I should probably wait to tell anybody....like maybe a week or two later.  hehe.


I feel like elaborating now.  After 40 hours of labor, a four hour pushing phase, and a slightly frightening after birth scene where they couldn't stop my bleeding and had to call in specialists for my tears...... I finally have my beautiful son in my arms and I feel so proud and ready to show him to the family.  My dh called them to tell them that as soon as we were in our recovery room they could come see the baby.  My mother responded by saying that they didn't know if they could hold on any longer they were feeling worn out.   I hit the ceiling. I have never been so angry.


post #22 of 25

Last time it was just me and DH.  When we transferred to the hospital our mothers were in the waiting room but were not invited in until several hours after the birth. They came into the labor/delivery room when they arrived and then I needed to sleep.  When I woke up to push I did not want them there, and then after the baby arrived we needed time to just bond the three of us.  We will do it the same way this time.  Just me and DH.  We will have family and friends support us by watching DD, but I don't want anyone but DH near me while I am in labor. 

post #23 of 25

I can't think of anyone else, aside from DH, that I would want to be with me. In case of an emergency, our neighbors can take the kids, but otherwise we don't have anyone planned to watch them. They're very level headed I expect another short labour so eve if they are awake, I can't see them being troublesome :)

We like to hole up for a couple days to bond with the new baby, so usually our family and friends don't descend upon our home for a little while anyway. It's so nice!

post #24 of 25

Last time (for my first) it was basically just me and my husband in the (hospital) room, with my parents, sister and brother-in-law, and grandparents in the waiting area.  I let my mom in the room for about 5 minutes at one point when things were relatively calm, but for the most part I really liked the focus of it being just me and my husband. (I did love that my mom brought homemade chicken broth--it was just what I needed, and that they went out and got a pizza for my husband when he got hungry )  This time my parents will probably be taking care of my daughter at their house, although I can see them taking turns coming to the hospital, since they are only a few minute drive away.  I think it is sort of silly for my sister and grandparents to hang out at the hospital waiting room all labor, but it doesn't much impact me one way or the other, so if they want to come again I won't stop them, and really it's pretty sweet that they'd even want to.  Last time my in-laws, who live across the country, didn't come in until the baby was about a week old.  I'm definitely less comfortable around them then my own family, so I liked that, and hope that is what they do again, but if they really want to come for the birth this time, I probably will let them, with the understanding that they are not going to be allowed anywhere near the birthing room until the baby is born. 


(Okay, enough procrastinating for me, now I must finish this project, so I can at least get a little sleep tonight) 

post #25 of 25

I will have DH and midwife for sure. It's our first, so there are no little kids to take care of, but someone will have to walk/feed our dog!

My parents are planning a roadtrip to come see us around the time of the birth, and are expected to arrive around the 25th of July or so... I'm due Aug 1st, and my family has a history of babies coming a little early, so they may or may not be in town for the birth. If they are, I do hope my mom is able to be with me for part of it. Her health is fragile (she's had stage 4 cancer for 10+ years, currently in remission) so she will need to rest, etc, but I think it would be special to have her around. She keeps asking me if I'm sure I really want her there, that her feelings won't be hurt if I need to be alone, so I think she will be very understanding if I feel differently in the moment. We are trying for a totally natural (hospital birth center, not home greensad.gif) birth, and the only part of natural birth she isn't totally supportive of is me eating the placenta! So she will be great if she can make it.


As for MIL, she is a very private person herself and so I'm sure won't mind not being invited at all. She can visit us as soon after as she likes.

  Return Home
  Back to Forum: August 2012 Birth Club
Mothering › Groups › August 2012 Birth Club › Discussions › Who will be coming to your birth?