or Connect
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Moms with babes chat

post #1 of 47
Thread Starter 
How's it going?

How is nursing? Sleep? Healing? What's going on in your life? Is the family visiting? How are your other kids dealing? First time moms, what are your feelings like about the new baby ?

DS is nursing like a champ, thank goodness. We had so many problems with DD not wanting to latch and just not having much of a need to suckle that we had to use SNS and spoonfeed her for the first month, meaning I was attached to my PIS constantly. I'm just so relieved that my milk has come in and he is a hungry little bug. His latch sucks, but we are working on it. In the meantime, my nipples are raw and hurting. I'm going to pump today to try to start freezing a little. Plus, my boobies are super engorged right now.

I drank a beer last night. Sweet deliciousness. Beer just doesnt taste the same when you are pregnant as is does afterwards. Sierra Nevada Ruthless Rye. It was amazing, and with no heartburn smile.gif I miss my litte guy squirming around inside me, but my body feels SO much better.

DD is in love. She is just totally infatuated with his every movement. She had some pretty bad tantrums yesterday, but I think she is really coming down hard off of some grandparent time and needs to decompress. We are going to go for a big walk today (its 60 degrees!!!) and burn off some energy and play outside.I hope her love for him lasts. She has asked to nurse, and I let her try but she just giggled insanely and spit on me. It was pretty cute. The biggest problem as of yet seems to be that she wants so badly to carry him around. That, and she never sleeps. Its my toddler keeping me up, not my newborn.

The family has been great. Around just enough, and giving us plenty of space. I actually cant wait for them to arrive today so I can nap a little. We are going to venture out to the drugstore today with both kiddos in the car at the same time. DS has an appointment at the ped tomorrow so tomorrow will be our first real outing. We are going to stop by a grocery store too. I have been homebound for weeks, so I am ready to get OUT.

I'm feeling a little baby blues, depressed that Im not pregnant anymore and trying to process the birth (it was great, but fast and hard to grasp). Im going tomorrow to pick up my encapsulated placenta. I didnt have any PPD last time, and I hope to avoid it again but I hope if I can start getting out a little that will help. I was feeling blue even before he was born. Im trying to eat super healthy, because even though I only gained about 9 lbs I still need to lose a good 20.

I have a first degree tear and a huge bruise that runs down the side of my labia. When I opened up my lips yesterday and looked I was shocked to see a huge black line there. It hurts to pee, but Im spraying benzocaine everytime to numb up because Im a wuss. My tailbone is a little bruised, but the relief my hips and back feel from not being pregnant anymore is awesome. I can bend over again!

I will write a birth story soon, I just have to get my head straight first smile.gif
post #2 of 47
Thread Starter 
bump....i know you ladies are out there smile.gif
post #3 of 47

Yesterday was day 3 and Im recovering from the hormonal shift. I hate day 3. Nursing is wonderful, so thankful to my nursing toddler who relieved the engorgment this morning. Sleep is good, napping when I can, Alden is a great sleeper so far. Kid.dos are in love. I'd type more but LO seems to take up a lot of arm.

post #4 of 47

We are chugging along with nursing after a major hiccup last week.  Unfortunately my little guy became jaundiced a few days after birth which made him sleepy and uninterested in nursing.  This of course made the jaundice worse and necessitated a 2 day stay in the hospital so he could receive phototherapy.  The whole ordeal made my milk painfully slow to come in, and my supply was terrible.  I was and still am feeling devastated about not being able to adequately feed my own baby.  Now we are nursing almost constantly and I am pumping like crazy on top of feelings and things do seem to be getting better, but not as quickly as I'd hoped.  The hormonal shifts on top of our nursing issues have also made me a crying mess.  I just nursed him into a milk coma though, so it seems we are making progress!


I'm still processing my birth experience too.  It was completely opposite to what I wanted.  The induction took two days, during which I spent most of my time strapped to a bed hooked up to monitors.  At the end, my little guy's head wasn't quite in the right position and after pushing for nearly 3 hours I had a forceps assisted delivery which resulted in a nasty 3rd degree tear which I am slowly recovering from.  I have a lot of regrets associated with my labor and delivery experience, and have been spending a lot of time reflecting on how I can make things go more smoothly next time.  


It probably sounds like I am complaining a lot but really, I love my little guy so much I am just glad he's here.  I'm so happy that he is home!


post #5 of 47

Atomicrocket - you are not complaining! Its good to take time to process your birth and I so hope this can be a comfortable place for you to vocalise your thoughts and feelings - they are most definitely valid! Glad to hear that your little guy is doing better, jaundice is a scary thing to deal with and crossing my fingers that your supply builds back up.

post #6 of 47

I hear you on the jaundice and nursing problems AtomicRocket.  Even though they agreed to discharge DD from the hospital she was jaundiced and with .1 higher bilirubin they would have forced the lights and a longer hospital stay. It must have been so hard to bring your babe back to the hospital.  Is the jaundice fully gone now?  Are you supplementing your milk with formula for now?  I know it's hard but you should still be able to get your supply up.  And, every bit of breastmilk you give your baby is good!  hug2.gif


My situation is a little rocky right now too.  By 1 week I  thought we had worked everything out.  But, at a weight check appt yesterday (she's 2 weeks) it turns out she actually lost 2 oz from week 1- week 2.  Now I'm stressing out and trying to not stress out...


I struggled with low weight gain baby and low supply with DD1.  So, in some ways this feels predictable but at the same time I'm so upset because it doesn't seem like my supply and her latch looks good and she has the right number of pee/poop diapers and she looks totally healthy.  So, what the hell is the problem?  


Other than that, I'm also finding the transition from 1 to 2 really hard.  Oh, and DH, the baby and I all had the worst virus last week.  Like the worst I can remember in years...  Fortunately that seems to be improving all around. 


So now I'm the one complaining.  Sorry guys! 

Edited by parsley - 2/7/12 at 11:40am
post #7 of 47

Kaydove - thanks, that's really nice to hear smile.gif

Parsley - yeah, the phototherapy was tough.  They inserted a tube through his nose into his stomach to ensure he was getting enough, and I weighed him before and after each feeding to see how much he was actually getting through breast feeding alone (which wasn't much). After each feeding they topped him up with formula.  They wouldn't discharge us until he would take a bottle of formula too sine he still wasn't taking in enough at the breast, and I wasn't able to pump enough either.  The constant feeding and pumping sessions plus domperidone have really improved my supply so I am slowly tapering him off bottles.  We are down to just a few ounces of formula per day, so we are almost there.  I went to a breast feeding clinic today and they set me up with a scale rental so we can do test feedings at home to make sure he is getting enough, which I am happy about since it is so hard to tell how much he is getting.  He almost never seems satisfied and it is heartbreaking.  He isn't back up to his birth weight yet either, and I like that I'll be able to track his weight gain at home.  His jaundice is almost completely gone now, but his face still has a hint of yellow to it.  Apparently it will take another week or so for his color to return to normal.


I hope your dd starts gaining more soon too!  Sorry to hear about the virus - glad you are recovering!

post #8 of 47

Glad this got bumped, I feel better knowing other people or going through the some of the same things. It's not complaining it's sharingwinky.gif


So week one down....

I'm feeling better. Had a second degree tear that I'm too scared to take a peek at and see how its doing. I'm feeling pretty good as long as I drag my donut around the house, but I feel like I might be swelling back up. The only change I've made was to take a couple of baking soda baths which I don't think would cause any reaction.


Nursing started off rough. Our little guy swallowed loads of stuff that he spent spitting up his whole first day so we started the sns feedings. He lost weight and since he started out pretty little we've been trying hard to keep up the feedings. I'm pumping some to give him a few feedings a day since he still wants to sleep through nursing. How do you keep them awake??? At the last appointment he'd gained a few ounces so hopefully we've turned the corner.


And we have colic or wild, possessed baby every night for a couple of hours. This has been such a shock, he's so mellow the rest of the time. We've been shushing and swaddling and rocking, etc like crazy. It's just heartbreaking to watch him flip out like that.




post #9 of 47

@Ramzubo you can try to keep them awake by having him eat in just a diaper. If he's not toasty warm they tend to have a harder time falling asleep. You can also try to hand express in his mouth when he starts dozing to trigger the suck reflex. Rubbing his cheek, and tickling his feet and try different nursing positions to see which one he'll be more alert for. DD was a preemie and we had the best luck with a foot ball hold at first. Good luck.

post #10 of 47

Oh it's so hard to type with three little ones taking up all of my arms!! smile.gif


For those sleepy babies out there, try breast compressions! My little guy tends to fall asleep on my left breast only after suckling for a few minutes. I always come back on the breast tissue and do a nice firm (not so hard that it hurts) squeeze and force some milk into his mouth. He usually starts actively sucking again. I continue to do this all around my breast, and this helps him get that fatty hind milk. My production has always been better on the right for some reason. Also, for your supply to adjust, the best thing is more stimulation at the breast. Nurse, nurse, nurse with every feeding cue, every whimper, as much as your baby wants to. It usually takes about 24-48 hrs for your body to get the message to produce more milk. Watch the diaper output, let me try to find a link from kellymom.com showing diaper output for BF babies and how to tell if they're getting enough. 


We're doing good. I only had one hormonal day where I cried over just looking at DS2 and realizing he was huge compared to my squishy new baby. Despite being a lactation consultant, we did have slight BF bumps in the road. He marathon nursed for the first 24 hours and as a result of that my milk was in SUPER fast. But he was a bit yellow in the eyes so I nursed him literally EVERY time he wanted to suck to prevent anymore jaundice. I was engorged for 3 days despite constant nursing. I had to hand express some of the milk out just to stay comfortable. Then my nipples got a bit sore because I was SO FULL that he couldn't get enough breast tissue in his mouth. But we worked it out. Now at 10 days old, all is well and no more boobie pain.


We went to the pediatrician at 8 days old and they were worried about his jaundice. I wasn't worried because I see this all of the time at work and knew he was stooling enough to not worry. He hadn't had meconium stools since day 2. But because the whites of his eyes were a little yellow, they sent him for a blood test. Pedi called yesterday though and all was well. 


Big brothers are adjusting fabulously. There is no jealousy, just love. It's weird because I definitely expected some lashing out with DS2 being autistic, but he has grasped the situation amazingly well. My biggest fear is not having enough time for all of my LO's, but they have been so helpful and love doing stuff for me and the baby... and are content with mommy doing puzzles or coloring while nursing basically 24-7.


I feel fabulous too, which is weird because I had a hard time recovering and PPD with DS2. I tried on a pair of pre-preg jeans two days ago and they fit, and on day 4 I was at my pre preg weight. I wanted to faint because it was SO hard with DS2. This baby is just nursing it right out of me. 

post #11 of 47

I also find the football hold to be the best position for a sleepy babe.  


Ds is 2 weeks old today!  We are heading to the pediatrician this afternoon and I am crossing my fingers that his weight is back up. 


Mamanoish - hurray for reaching your per pregnancy weight so soon!  That is amazing.  I still have 15 lbs or so to go, but I'd like to lose about 25 total since I had some extra weight to begin with.  I am not going to start actively trying to lose weight for another month though.  I'm hoping I'm lucky enough to nurse away at least a few more pounds in the meantime.

post #12 of 47

Well, my kids go crazy everytime I come on the computer digging in everything.


Nursing has been great this time around other then a blister the first week. My little guy was up a lb at 2 wks. He is 3 wks today and looks a lot bigger then last week. I need to go buy some size 2 diapers for night time because if he doesn't poop I don't get out of bed to change him, and he's peeing out of his size 1 diapers.


The older kids are in love with baby. The first couple days were really hard on my toddler, but other then bedtime she's loving baby.


I still have at least 15 lbs to go before I'm at my pre pregnancy weight. I had to go shopping last week and buy some bigger jeans.


Shannon - You can try Gripe Water for your baby. It's for colic. I bought mine from my local health food store. You could also try swansonvitamins.com. They have most things on there cheaper then the health food stores.

post #13 of 47
Thread Starter 
Just a little update from us:
DS is two weeks old today! We had a visit with the ped yesterday and he weighed in at 7 lbs 9 oz, up from 6 lbs 13 oz just 7 days before! He is a hungry little bug, nursing all the time. He constantly wants to suckle, and with DD needing my attention too, I cant have him attached all the time, so Ive already broken down and given a pacifier. He doesnt like to be in a wet diaper, so Ive already switched over to cloth even though our cloth dipes are way too big for him. He pees like 10 times a day and wants to be changed immediately, so we were going through pampers swaddlers like a mofo. So far, I feel pretty lucky that we havent had many issues and he seems like a fairly easy baby. Maybe Im just comparing him to my oh-so-difficult toddler.

Are any of you pumping?
I didnt pump with DD really, at least not once we got past the first couple of weeks and she finally latched. It made my life really hard. She never took a bottle, or really even a sippy cup well, so leaving her with anyone for more than two hours was just not possible until she was about 10 months old. This time Im pumping, both so that DH can feed him if Im having to deal with a toddler meltdown, and to get him used to taking a bottle a little earlier so that when he is a little older we can go out to dinner without being called back. I found these ice cube trays that hold exactly one ounce per cube, and Im filling them up. I only have about 25 oz so far. DH fed him from the bottle today while I pumped just so we could see if he would take it. We use the Adriri Natural Nurser bottles, and his latch is great, so Im not worried about nipple confusion the way I was with DD.

DD hit DS two days ago, and my mama bear instinct came out. She took his gumdrop and he cried and I took it back from her and she hit him on the head. I resisted the urge to immediately hit her back, and instead had DH come and get her from me, but it brought up a lot of feelings that I hadnt had to deal with yet. I guess I just feel like he is so helpless and needs to be protected, but at the same time I have to understand that she is dealing with a lot of change as well. It felt strange, like I was playing favorites or something.

Im back down to lower than my pre pregnancy weight, but still have about 20 lbs to lose to get to my goal weight. I dont have any clothes, because my pre pregnancy clothes are too small, and shopping with a toddler and a newborn is impossible. I lost DH's wallet last week, with $350 in cash in it, so that put a little damper on things.
post #14 of 47

So we're doing much better keeping baby awake, thanks for the tips. He's finally able to finish one side and stay awake for a little more on the other.


Originally Posted by 100%mom View Post 


Shannon - You can try Gripe Water for your baby. It's for colic. I bought mine from my local health food store. You could also try swansonvitamins.com. They have most things on there cheaper then the health food stores.

Thanks, I picked up some today and will see if that helps.



Originally Posted by Adaline'sMama View Post

Are any of you pumping?
I didnt pump with DD really, at least not once we got past the first couple of weeks and she finally latched. It made my life really hard. She never took a bottle, or really even a sippy cup well, so leaving her with anyone for more than two hours was just not possible until she was about 10 months old. This time Im pumping, both so that DH can feed him if Im having to deal with a toddler meltdown, and to get him used to taking a bottle a little earlier so that when he is a little older we can go out to dinner without being called back. I found these ice cube trays that hold exactly one ounce per cube, and Im filling them up. I only have about 25 oz so far. DH fed him from the bottle today while I pumped just so we could see if he would take it. We use the Adriri Natural Nurser bottles, and his latch is great, so Im not worried about nipple confusion the way I was with DD.

I'm pumping since we were doing the sns at the hospital. DS has only been making it through one breast so I've been pumping the other. He gets a bottle at night from DH to help with our sleep and hasn't had any latch issues so far. I've got 12 oz stored up and I'm getting about 4oz a day to store.




Ugg the weight loss is going to be a struggle for me. I gained 43lbs during the pregnancy and only lost about 12lbs since. I've been taking DS out for hikes around our hilly property, but that's not going to do much

post #15 of 47

things are going well for us here.  doing some skin to skin right now after she took a long nap in the sunshine by our south facing windows.  so snuggled!  she is an efficient nurser and sleeping soundly, especially when swaddled.  it's so incredible to get to nurse a wee newborn, again after all these years.  so tender.  somehow, i am not feeling as raw as i have with my first two.  it just feels smooth and i feel grateful for everything.  the birth was awesome and i am still in awe from how wonderful it was! 


i was worried about being sad over how our family dynamic would change and 'losing' the strong connection to my older girls.  maybe bc i was more aware of it and am being more intentional about sustaining my connection to them, i don't feel so much of a loss.  i don't know they whys of it all...i am certainly less weepy and not feeling emotionally on a roller coaster.  i just feel steady and full of joy even.  i am so thankful. 


my oldest loves holding her as often as possible.  the babe makes a peep and my oldest says, "mom, do you need me to hold her or rock her?" instantly.  six year old lil mamas rock!  i take showers while she just holds her or lies beside in her in the bed.  i was putting dinner on the table and thought the babe was in her moses basket rocker but look over and my oldest is holding her while eating!  that was a difficult task for me to manage and yet she got it down.  my almost 4 year old is content with her but not as interested.  the first two days she was really upset to not get a little brother.  she actually left the room after babe was born and before the placenta was even out (a mere few minutes) to scream no, no, no in her room b/c she was so upset about babe not being a boy...and she stepped in amniotic fluid, i think.  she is warming up well now though and holds her, tells her she loves her, etc.


we're glad to have some friends bringing food already and will do mealbaby.com soon for about a month.  randomly, people have dropped off the best treats for us like homemade bread and nursing pads, wool longies/shorties/hats/booties and amazing vegan popsicles!  rather unexpected but soooo appreciated.  my MIL on the other hand has been the exact opposite of helpful and actually pulled one of her attention seeking cry fest crazytown events last night!  goodness.  it was horrible and amazing at the same time.  i am still reeling from her comments and lack of helpfulness.  poor lady. 


hope that you all are doing well for at least some part of each day.  moments can get crazy and hectic but i hope there is lots of loving joy overall for you each!

post #16 of 47

Ah!  A chance to catch up.  DH is holding DD and I have two hands to type with!!!!   It's so great to read everyone's updates.  And, I'm so glad things are going so well for everyone. 


AtomicRocket- how'd it go at the ped appt? 


Adaline'sMama and Rambuzo - I can't believe how much milk you already have stored.  I am so bad at pumping.  It's like the minute I see that thing I tense up.  When DD1 was a babe it was so hard for me to pump enough for her while I was at work.  So I'm trying to start pumping now but I never get more than an ounce in a sitting; even though I still feel the milk in my breast!   Probably doesn't help that DD1 is so quick to nurse these days either.  Any surplus seems to go right to her!  So we have only 3 oz saved at this point.  It will work for one feeding but that's not quite enough for comfort for me.  I have a few work things coming up (2-3 hour events, talks, etc...)  that I'd like to make an appearance at to support my students or the speakers and I'm really not sure if I'm comfortable bringing the baby with me.  Maybe I'll try pumping later on when I'm nursing the baby. 


Things are going well here.  We had another ped appt and the baby had gained 4 oz in a week so it's at the low end of the growth spectrum but not too bad.  And, by our own baby scale we actually saw a gain of 6 1/2 oz so I'm actually feeling optimistic.  Our ped (who is very calm and very slow to give meds) was concerned that maybe the cold we all had for 2 weeks was actually strep so he did a culture on the baby.   I'm so hoping he's not going to call and suggest Antibiotics! 


Things are also definitely improving with my older daughter.  She's still showing a lot of anxiety around sleeping and she won't agree to stay at school during naptime anymore.  She's also very unfriendly to extended family (don't really blame her).   But otherwise she's pretty much her sweet usual self.  Woke me up yesterday morning with a kiss and a "Happy Valentine's Day, Mommy".  Much better than crying or yelling at me.  I do think the sleep thing is going to take a long time to heal.  She's always been an exceptionally bad sleeper-- still nursing to sleep, only spends a few hours a night in her own bed and believes I'm there with her ( ;) ), states that she hates sleeping, etc... and the seperation of two nights while I was in the hospital left a huge wound (on both of us, though I've now recovered).


Anyway, sorry I don't have time for more personal notes or more details but I want to take a shower before the babe wakes up!    

post #17 of 47

At his 2 week appointment ds was still 2 oz below his birth weight, but the ped wasn't worried.  After the appointment I picked up the scale I rented to see how much he is getting at the breast, and the results are not good.  Most feedings he'll only take in 15 ml or so, which is a fraction of what he needs.  Sometimes he'll take in 30ml, and sometimes even 50, but that is still nowhere close to what he needs.  I am back to pumping after every feed and topping him up with a bottle.  He is now back to getting about 50% formula, since the amount I pump isn't sufficient either.  It sucks.  It's a vicious cycle because the more formula I give him, the less I'll produce, but I am not ready to give up on our breastfeeding relationship just yet.  He also has an obvious preference for bottles now, so I've ordered a lactation aid that will allow me to supplement at the breast and I'm hoping that with time we can eventually reduce/eliminate bottles, and increase the amount I produce since my breast will be stimulated for the duration of the feed.  I've been going to a breastfeeding clinic, but the lactation consultant that I've been seeing hasn't been very helpful, so I'm trying to figure things out on my own now.  It sucks but I am still chugging along and working on improving/salvaging our breastfeeding relationship.

post #18 of 47
Thread Starter 
Avtomicrocket, Im sorry you are dealing with so much stress regarding your breastfeeding relationship. Things were really hard with us for DD too, and I know how much anxiety it can bring. Just remember that you are an awesome mom, regardless of how much milk you are producing or how his weight gain is coming along. A lot of babes have a hard time at first and then things fall into place all at once. Keep at the pumping, I know it sucks, but it will keep your supply up. I watched two seasons of Lost when DD was weeks old and just pumped on a lower setting while I was watching tv, and it helped. I know a lot of people arent super into TV, but it helped me take my mind off of the feeling that I wasnt doing a good enough job to feed my kid 100% at the boob. Keep up the good work, you are amazing!!!

I was so lazy after we finally got dd to the boob well, I never pumped. Im only doing it this time because I remember how much it sucked to never be able to go anywhere last time. What kind of pump are you using? Is it the same as last time? You might need to replace the membranes, I know I did. If the membranes are bad you wont get as much milk. Last time, I only got about an ounce everytime I pumped, but DS eats on a pretty good schedule I so Im able to pump once a day for a "pretend" feeding while he naps. That may not last, so Im getting in all I can. Every woman is different, as is every baby, so dont feel bad about how much you are getting!

Gunter, Congrats!!! I didnt realize you had had your baby smile.gif Im excited for you. How is mealbaby working out? I really wanted to try it, but I didnt feel like I knew enough about it.

A little update from us:
DS will be 3 weeks tomorrow!! Time is flying,and it makes me kind of sad already. He is still nursing well, and gaining well. He seems to have some tummy issues, but mainly he just poots all the time. DD is in love with him, but is tantruming to a ridiculous extent for the times she isnt holding him. I have found (seemingly) a great babysitter for her that we will start taking her to once a week for me to get a little time to be able to do bills and other things that require my brain to function. Im a little sad that the babymoon is ending and real life iss starting to happen again, but I guess that is to be expected. No symptoms of PPD, but the baby blues seem to be way worse this time than last. I feel a little sad that things arent as exciting and amazing as they were last time I had a baby, but DH and I have been discussing it and I feel like we have reached the conclusion that the first time you have a baby you really "become a parent" and its a huge step in life that you have entered. When you have your second, its exciting, but there is no real huge change about who you are/ are going to become that is taking place. I guess I just didnt expect it to be any different this time.

Im trying to get back on schedule taking my placenta pills. I stopped for a few days because I had an infection scare, and then food poisoning and didnt want to introduce anything different to my body. Im trying to get back to it, but I have some fear that it was making me sick, which I know is silly.

I love having two kids, it has really made my family unit stronger. Before DS was born, it kind of just felt like DH and I had a kid together, and now it feels more like a family. I think introducing a relationship that I dont have any control over really makes things different. With DD, I had a relationship with her, and DH had a relationship with her. I had a relationship with DH. All of the relationships were kind of controlled by what we, as adults, know to be "good" or "right", but now there is a relationship within our family dynamic that is completely organic and without any knowledge of how relationships are supposed to work. It is really neat to watch DD fall in love with this baby, just because she loves him, without any "supposed to" about it. I know it could be articulated better, but does that make sense to any 2nd (or 3rd, or 4th, ect...) time moms?
post #19 of 47

(feeling myself falling down the rabbit hole of crashing hormones... 63 hours postpartum.  started eating my placenta...)

post #20 of 47

When do these afterpains stop?  Ugh!

New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: February 2012