Queer Conceptions February 2012 - Page 11

[DesertSunsets]

esenbee- just wanted to say GOOD LUCK!!! on your insems this cycle!  That is too fantastic, that your return got deposited just in time!  

Lise, that just sounds like a terribly interesting island in general.  Best of luck with all those kiddos!  I'm sure you'll do fine.  

Amt, I'm sorry!  Hugs to you guys, I hope your DP feels better soon. 

Cananny - I keep following along closely with you guys!  Good luck!  

nosreves - that rotten AF better not show up or I will give her the what-for! 

Good luck, everybody!  February is a great time to get pregnant!

[outdoorsy]

Temp drop Sat, then temp spike Sun, and NO SMILEY. I am so disappointed and pissed. I had no noticeable EWCM. I had some ovary sensations Fri night and Sat morning, but was waiting for smiley, then got the temp spike on Sun. I viewed my cervix, and it is closed. I will keep testing once a day, but I don't expect anything. Next month, THIS IS WAR!!!! I will do digital and non-digital tests, view cervix every two days, and near O time I will test more than once a day. I am so #$$%^^& pissed.

[nosreves]

outdoorsy -- ugh, that really sucks, but don't forget that it takes 3 days of elevated temperatures before you can be sure of ovulation.  are you using fertility friend, by any chance, and if you are, would you mind posting a link to your chart?  also, have you had tests done in the past to verify ovulation?  if you're having a hard time pinpointing ovulation, would it be possible to get a follicle scan done instead of just relying on OPKs?  you could combine the u/s with a trigger shot for better timing.  (smilingsara in QP&P did that, and it worked perfectly for her)  i don't remember all of your background, so forgive me for asking questions that you may have already answered.  in any case, *big hugs*

[outdoorsy]

Nosreves, thanks for replying. I actually didn't know it took three days of elevated temps to be sure I'd ovulated, but it seems like I have based on other symptoms (I'll keep testing, though). After last month's opk fiasco (probably got an early false positive), I talked to the midwife who is the director of the insemination program at my clinic, and she said we should wait to do any further intervention (including u/s, shots) until I've tried a few more months unmedicated. She said a u/s at this point would be very expensive because it's too soon to get it covered by insurance. I've never had any tests to verify ovulation. I'm not using fertility friend, but I'm starting to put a lot more detail on my paper chart (daily cm, more frequent cervix checks). Do you use FF, and does it help more than paper charting? Do you have any other advice? Thanks much.

[DesertSunsets]

Outdoorsy, I'm so sorry how things have been going for you.  UGH.  Hugs.  My DW started out charting on paper, and also began keeping track of additional information on the paper chart like you've mentioned.  She decided she'd like to try using Fertility Friend, so we went back and put in several months worth of charts.  It was great to have it all in one place, and it has tons of options that you can choose to chart all the extra things.  The only negative we found is that sometimes FF's opinion of when DW ovulated was different than ours.  So... if you're already struggling with the ovulation thing, FF could be a benefit or it could just really piss you off.  

Good luck to you!  I'm sure you'll figure it out.  

[EmilyandCathy]

Hi All!! And thanks for the invite, nosreves!!  My partner Cathy and I are getting married in 10 days and hope to start the baby-making on my next cycle in March.  We are VERY new to the whole AI thing and, so far, have experienced a roller-coaster.  We have been searching for a donor for about a year, had 2 back out and, as of 3 days ago, found out that the WONDERFUL donor did not pass his physical :( SO we will be trying frozen sperm.

Right now we are trying to figure out the whole ovulation thing.  Does anyone have any suggestions?  How accurate are the tests? Thanks again and GOOD LUCK to everyone!!!!

[nosreves]

outdoorsy -- i'd just like to second what desert said about FF.  we've been using it since last may, and it's an incredible resource.   you can go back and see patterns that you might have otherwise missed.    i also agree that it's not necessarily always right about your ovulation day, but you can override what it says if you disagree.  it allows you to record CM and cervical position & openness as well as a whole host of symptoms, medications, supplements, etc.    it sounds like your midwife knows what she's doing, but i'd definitely keep recording your temps, CM, etc, so you can get a clearer picture of how your cycle works.  also, when you sign up for Fertility Friend, you get a ton of information on the different parts of your cycle, how ovulation works, what to look for, etc.

emilyandcathy -- welcome to the greatest group of queer ttc'ers in the whole wide world!  also, congratulations on your impending nuptials!  how exciting to have two major life events happening at the same time.  i feel you on the donor search problems.  my DP and i spent nearly a year trying to find one, only to have donor #1 turn out to be very, very flaky.  we finally got a second, more reliable one, but, due to our ages and other issues we've recently moved on to IUIs with frozen sperm.  i think you'll find that pinpointing ovulation is one of the biggest headaches in the ttc process.  we've used both the clearblue fertility monitor and the cheapie OPKs (ovulation predictor kits, aka the little sticks you pee on.)  the OPKs are useful, but they don't work well for everyone, as it's possible to miss your surge.  it can help a lot to use different methods together, i.e.  temping (recording your basal body temperature each morning), checking cervical position and texture, checking cervical mucus as well as OPKs.  the site i recommended to outdoorsy is fertilityfriend.com, and i'd like to suggest it to you as well.  btw, would you like me to add you to our list on the first page?  feel free to keep asking questions.  the women on this board are not only incredibly knowledgeable, they're also very friendly and helpful.    

[EmilyandCathy]

Yes! Definitely add me to the list!  Thanks SO much for all of the suggestions.  It was really great discovering this site today and read about other women's experiences and knowing that there are other people out there going through similar issues! 

[darthtunaqueen]

Woo!  New peeps!  

Congrats on the wedding, Emily and Cathy!!

Carmen, I'm so sorry!  A dear friend of mine went through that about a month ago, she chose the medication because she couldn't stand the idea of remaining "pregnant".  I wish for you space and time to do what you need to do to get to be where you need to be!

Not a ton of time for personals, as I just got back from camp (nothing like spending the weekend trapped in a cabin with a dozen 5 and 6 year old girls as birth control... unfortunately it doesn't work anymore, because all I can think of is how I WANT one!!  AUGH!).  

DW's temp dropped suddenly this morning, it's only DPO 10, so it's kinda early for that, but she also started spotting yesterday.  Auuugghh!  We're wondering now if DW and KD have a sperm-egg incompatibility...  KD is going to get his sperm counted again (something we asked him to do in December and he hasn't done it yet).  We're on a weird time-line now, because we're moving 45 minutes away at the end of April, so it's going to complicate things A LOT.  I feel like we're wasting time with KD, that there's something else going on and that's why it's not working (gut says incompatible).  We may be switching to a clinic sooner rather than later (I was going to hold out for a year, but with the move and the distance I think it might just be too hard).  

Anyways, came to whine to you guys and people who understand.  Thanks for listening!  I'm going to take my stinky self to the shower and start laundry (oh boy!).  

Good luck to everyone!!  

[nosreves]

emilyandcathy: shall i put you under waiting for AF (aunt flo) or are you already waiting for ovulation?

[darthtunaqueen]

If we could be moved to "waiting to flow", peas and carrots!  xo

[EmilyandCathy]

We are going to be waiting for my next cycle (should be around March 17th) for ovulation (and first insemination attempt) on March 27ish.  Does that help?  Haha, it might take us a while to learn the "lingo".

[nosreves]

allisson -- blah!  are you sure it's AF on her way and not an implantation dip/bleeding?  i'll go ahead and move you, in any case, and if the witch isn't coming after all, i can move you to a happier section.  as for doing insems in a clinic, i'm all for it.  i know that fresh sperm is the best for getting pregnant, but there's something very reassuring about having a sure source of sperm that's been rigorously tested.  everyone's needs are different.... i probably should have been doing IUIs from the start because of cervix issues, and my gut was telling me that from the beginning.  i'd listen to what yours is telling you.  that's just my 2centimes, though....  hang in there!

[darthtunaqueen]

Nos, I don't think so... DPO 10 is kinda late for implantation, isn't it?  I just dumped her temperature into TCOYF and it's RIGHT on her cover line this morning...  Her temps have been so stable lately that I really not going to get excited...  It did a lovely rise on DPO 4 and I thought it was the beginning of the double step rise, but it dropped back to where it had been sitting for 3 days.  She can tell when her temp's dropped too, it tends to drop overnight because she wakes up totally overheated (whereas she's cooler when her temp is higher).  Also, it dipped yesterday too, but only by 0.1 F.  Plus 2 days of spotting, I'm not convinced.  Bummer this month, since she's pretty sure she ovulated on BOTH SIDES and so I got all excited about possibly having twins (which is insane, because my view of twins is that they ALWAYS end up in the NICU, even though I know this to be untrue, but we see soooooo many twins in the NICU!).

[rs11]

Wow -there's so much to catch up on!

Outdoorsy -I'm sorry you're having such difficulties. I wish I could help.

EmilyandCathy -Welcome! Congrats on the wedding, and welcome to trying to conceive!

Nosreves: Any word yet? Have you tested?

Allison: 10 DPO is NOT too late for implantation bleeding. It generally happens anywhere from 6-12 DPO. If she hasn't gotten a full-on AF in a couple of days, you should test to be sure.

AFM: Not much to report. I'm 3 DPO and wishing it was closer to time to test. DW has chilled a lot from last month, which is good. The only thing that's different thus far and that my CM hasn't gone away. Last month (like most months) it dried up for a few days, but not this month.

[invitnconceptn]

Hello all. So finally back after a week with personals. It was DW's birthday week and boy did I spoil my lady. I surprised her with a mystery dinner theater show last night. Having never been, I found that the whole experience was definitely more fun than I thought it would be.

Anyhooo............

RS11, Mrs and Mrs., Cananny: Power to you girls on the same cycle and following the same course of fertility treatments!! Rock on bad selves. Ok random thought just entered my mind: Wouldn't it be cool if you could tell just by looking at another woman whether or not she was on the same cycle as you? Perhaps sometimes depending on your mood, it would feel like TMI. However for people like me so focused on getting pregnant, I think that it would be so empowering and less shaming if there were completely obvious visible signs that you and the cashier at Target were both on cd 14. Instead of chatting about the weather, you could have funny banter about pains of ovulation. Yup I can see it now.

Outdoory: Like others have noted already, I think that fertility friend can be an ally one day and foe the next, so be wary. I say this because last month ff told me first that O'd on day 9 after I got a spike in my temp. If I didn't remembered that I had woke up with a fever that day than I would have been duped by ff's charms. Interestingly, ff changed my O date about 1 1/2 later after my temp began to spike and stay up this time. Nos: I had no idea about the 3 days of elevated temps rule and I have been temping now since mid 2010. Outdoorsy, have you thought about simply asking your doc to test your progesterone levels on day 21 of your cycle to confirm that you O'd. If there is no dispute that you in fact did O, then this test may not be worthwhile.

Nos: Ok I think that it is day 15 or 16 past O for you, right? I completely understand if you are not up for a HPT (I never am) but girl, I think that you may want to POAS for good measure, considering the trigger shot may be out of your system by now, right? Fx for you.

Emily and Cathy: Welcome welcome. Congratulations on getting hitched. I can't believe that you have the time to get on here with all the things you guys must have to do in prep for your wedding. The last week before my wedding in 2010 is a complete blur at this point. I hope you two have an amazing day.  I hope your stay is short once you guys start the process. Sorry to hear about your KD issues. I can relate to the nightmare of trying to find someone who is the right fit. I think DW and I first asked 2 good friends who either said no or didn't give much reply, which said a lot to me. I think that it is really smart to start looking for a donor so early before ttc. If I knew 3 years ago that it would take over a year to secure a good guy than DW and I would have started looking much earlier. I support your decision to go with frozen sperm. In some ways, the frozen goods are the best bet when you want guaranteed reliability. Regarding ovulation: I would monitor CM phases, and phases of cervix opening, as well as OPKs. Also, look out for posts by Krista for more astute info on detecting ovulation. She really knows her stuff.

Allison: Although charting temps is a helpful tool. It can be deceiving. Who knows?! I hope that this is true for DW. fx crossed.

AFM: nothing much to report. I'm on cd 10 and maybe getting sticky CM at this point. DW and I are excited to finally get to try with KD this month since last month's KD's wife had a miscarriage. KD is a really busy fella so I'm keeping him in the loop every day about my fertility signs so he can have a heads up about when to ship the goods. 

In other news, I have started doing ashtanga yoga again, modified primary series, and I'm loving it. I go with my friend who is 6 months preg and do all the modified poses she does, to support fertility. The instructors sometimes get confused about my intentions, thinking I'm pregnant too not understanding why I'm not doing twists if I'm not pregnant. In those moments, I would love for there to be a special fertility yoga class, where I wouldn't have to explain my fertility focus and it would just be known.Watching my pregnant's friend interaction with others in the class and with the instructors, I think it is so interesting how little you have to explain once you are pregnant. Folks simply say "congratulations." Wouldn't it be interesting if more people would congratulate you if you said that you were trying to make baby via AI?  Hmm...what a world that would be.

Well and to all and to all a good night.

[nosreves]

hi, everyone.  i just wanted to let ya'll know that  made her appearance this morning.  i'm not really upset, because, as i said before, i wasn't even expecting to be able to try this month.  AND there's still a chance that DP is knocked up.  i'm supposed to start injectables (follistim/puregon) on cd1, which i *think* means today.  it's about 1pm here and i've just started to get bright red blood.  the flow is still light, but for the last year, my periods have never progressed beyond a light flow.  what do you think?  do i start the injections tonight?  

thanks to everyone who has sent good wishes/vibes this month.  even though i didn't get my BFP, i feel very lucky to finally be getting real treatment and lucky to be among such an amazing group of gals.   and considering that i'll probably be inseminating sometime early next week, february might still be my month. 

now, come on everyone else! i'd like to add some more graduates to the roll before my tenure of threadkeeper is up!

Edited by nosreves - 2/20/12 at 5:32am

[carmen358]

Allison: I'm sorry it looks like you're out already. I don't think 10DPO is too late for implantation - it's "late-ish" but not out of the realm of possibility. Can you get "incompatibility" tested between your DP and donor?

Outdoorsy: Ugh, that sounds confusing. Fwiw, I've used FF a lot and I think it's a great tool. You don't have to pay for the full membership to get a lot out of it either. I had a paid subscription while ttc DD but decided to just go with the free one this time and it's been super helpful.

Welcome, EmilyandCathy. I hope your stay is short and sweet.

Crossing my fingers for you still, rs :)

invitn: Good luck with the KD this cycle! The yoga sounds like a good idea.

nosreves: Bah. I thought this was it for you. I'm still crossing my fingers for your DP but sorry to hear it didn't work out for you. :(

Afm: I'm still hanging out in limbo if you can believe it. Nothing happening to indicate my body is doing anything. My acupuncture appointment is tomorrow. If I haven't started spotting by Friday I'm going to take the medication. I'd love to not take it....I prefer to trust my body in this case but I'm getting a bit anxious about the possibility of infection. I desperately need sleep and anxiety over this is keeping me up at night. My poor DD is having to put up with a cranky, tired mama quite a bit these days.

[pokeyAC]

nosreves-Sorry you didn't get a positive this month, but it sounds like you have a good attitude.  Good luck with the treatment and for next month.

invitnconceptn-I have been doing vinyasa yoga for several months on the recommendation of the midwife who was doing preconception counseling with me.  It reduces stress and is good exercise.  I go to a class that is level 1-prenatal ok, so there is a mix of pregnant women and everyone else.  It's a nice mix.  I am hopeful to move on to the regular prenatal class soon.  Doesn't yoga feel great?

EmilyandCathy-Welcome and congratulations on your upcoming nuptials!  Looks like we are close to cycle buddies.  We are skipping this month but I will probably ovulate next month around the 21st.  My birthday is the 22nd so it would be nice to have a birthday baby.

My doula client had her baby on Friday, so I am all free to focus back on making my own baby. 

Also wanted to say that it is normal to ovulate on the same side or not.  My midwife said you could ovulate on on side for years and then it could happen on the other side.  I've had the same confusion in the past when I felt it on the same side month after month.

[lisedea]

Wow, busy around here!

outdoorsy--Definitely test more than once a day!! Some people have really short surges. What time do you normally test at? The suggested 2:00pm time? I would also like to add that I used to chart by paper as well--but find FF much nicer. Plus, it has such lovely colors.

Allison--fingers crossed for you still!!! 10 days is not too late for implantation.

Carmen--I hope your appointment goes well tomorrow and helps you naturally move on before Friday.

nosreves--Sorry about AF! BOO!!!

E&C--Welcome!!

10dpo and I am beginning to feel the tingling in my lower stomach that I get right before AF arrives. Uggg...I know it is still early (AF should arrive Wed or Thurs), but it definitely makes me depressed.