Need help working through baby arguments and a jealous twin!

[TwinGirlyMama]

Hi! I'm new on these forums and a fairly new mama as well :)

My husband and I just adopted our twin baby girls 4 1/2 months ago. They were 6 months old when we brought them home. They have grown and changed so much in the short time we have had them. They have learned to crawl and babble and are pulling up and starting to walk with assistance. Its very exciting and fun to watch. Some of the new things that they have learned lately aren't as fun and I expect somewhat unique to multiple sibling groups. My girls are 10 1/2 months old now and have recently started fighting over toys. Faith is stronger than Hope so she usually wins the fight. The other unpleasant new behavior I have noticed lately is that Hope tends to gets very upset anytime I pick up Faith for any reason. Whether it is to cuddle, change clothes, put in her high chair...it doesn't matter. If I'm doing anything with Faith, Hope is throwing a fit and trying to claw her way into my lap. I take care of both girls equally and try to play with both girls equally...so I don't know where this came from.

Has anyone else had issues like this? I know that my girls are too young to reason with so I have no clue as to how to curb these behaviors. It is kind of frustrating and discouraging to be in the middle of. Any advice would be super appreciated.

[Red Pajama]

The only thing I can say is it sounds normal. Babies and young children are egocentric. If they want what the other has, they will take it. You can mitigate your problems by having two of the most desirable things. That will only work for awhile, but it does buy some time.

[mylilmonkeys]

My twins will be 11mo on the 3rd, and they're hitting this stage, too.  One will wake up earlier than the other, and she'll get loads of time nursing, then when the other is up and needs to feed, the first will want back in, too.  Frustrating!  They were fighting over an Xbox controller someone left within reach this morning.  I distracted them with a noisy toy they enjoy and managed to rescue it when they didn't notice.  They did smile at each other once this morning, too, so there is hope! ;)

[anexia]

One thing I have been amazed with is that they really arent too young to be reasoned with.  We have had a lot of this too but I started talking to them about what was hapening.  Telling one baby it wasnt her turn but I would be with her in a minute.  We do a little baby sign and I hold one finger up and say  one minute.  this works great when I am going to leave the room for a minute it really helps with anxiety and if I had to pick up one baby first or get one a bottle before the other.  They have really learning to trust that I will take care of both of them. 

Same aproach with fighting over toys.  doesnt work perfectly but it does help and they are starting to take care of eachother.  One baby will find 2 snack cups or binkies and pass one to her sister.  Almost makes up for trying to rip her sisters ponytail out over the magnadoodle :)