February 2012 Whatever Ladies and Babies - Page 13

[MarineWife]

i think it's important to tailor answers based on the readiness of the child. i wouldn't have the same discussion about religion or evolution or sex with a 4yo than i would have with a 16yo. but, i also don't think there's a set age or range when all kids are ready for this or not ready for that. it depends on each, individual child.

ethan and kellen certainly know where babies come from but don't quite get how they are made. when ethan would ask about having a baby sister, i kept telling him he'd have to ask his dad. he didn't get what dad had to do with me having a baby. it eventually occurred to me to stop saying that if he didn't get it and wasn't asking why. i am not in any rush to explain the mechanics of sex to him.

I think Ryan was 5-6 when he started to ask about that stuff. He used to help me study for my biology courses and would ask questions.

Carrie ~ Hmm...I'm not sure what it means that you aren't ready to give up most of Finn's stuff. I'm ready to purge almost everything of Dylan's as soon as he's outgrown it. It's kind of bugging me that I can't really do it until Sean gets home. There are few choice things I will probably keep as keepsakes, but even most of my knitted longies will be for sale soon.

[AnnieA]

Back to the convo we were having a few days ago about praising kids' efforts vs praising their intelligence. Here's a link to an older article explaining how damaging it can be to praise a kid's intelligence. http://nymag.com/news/features/27840/ I thought it was especially interesting how kids start to think teachers are lying when they continually praise their intelligence. I'd love to hear you guys' opinions on that article.

Science stuff...yeah I'm all over the place on that one. I went to christian/protestant schools K-college. I didn't learn the evolutionary theory until I got to college because my teachers would literally skip over those chapters when our science books would attempt to discuss them. I think that's wrong. But I had lots of different teachers in college that had a variety of beliefs. Many of my biology teachers described themselves as old Earth creationists meaning that they don't believe that the Earth has only been around for 7,000 years (the fossil record/carbon dating is pretty much irrefutable on that subject) but they do believe that God created the Earth. I lean more towards intelligent design but acknowledge that evolution on both the macro and micro scale exists. That was an interesting point of discussion when we took the kids to the National Museum of Natural History in DC a couple of years ago. Even though my kids have always attended public school, they go to a very conservative baptist church with their mom and so do not believe in evolution. There is a whole wing about human development and that led to a lot of discussions. I think it's important to be exposed to all the different ideas. We are Catholic and attend church weekly. Prayer is part of our family, we pray before meals and our kids hear us talking about praying for things and others. They also attend church with their mom and get a different level of religion.

Sleep..we had a much better night last night! DD only woke to eat and she never really woke up. Question for you mamas that side-lie nurse at night. Do you pick your baby up? DD seemed to do much better last night when I just left her laying down and fed her that way. She only roused enough to eat and then went right back to sleep. But I feel guilty (I guess that's what I'm feeling) about not picking her up for seven hours. Also, she didn't get her diaper changed that whole time and I feel guilty about that. But if I pick her up to try to feed her, she just gets mad and it wakes her up and then she's up for 1-2 hours in the middle of the night.

Oh and DD ate 8 oz while I was at work and I was able to pump 11 oz. Woohoo!

[MarineWife]

I don't pick Dylan up when he nurses at night unless I need to roll him over to my other side because I'm getting stiff. Even then, I don't always pick him up. Sometimes I just roll him over on the bed. Sometimes I roll him over me, which is sort of like picking him up, but I don't sit up with him in any way. I don't know why you would feel bad about that. You are still very close to your baby. She feels you there, with maybe your arm around her.

I agree a lot with that article. I was deemed as very smart at a very young age. I was put in all the gifted and talented programs. I was terrified to try anything that I wasn't sure I would be good at. Even now I do that, sort of. I'll try new things in privacy but not in front of others. When I was in school I flat out refused to write papers because I thought I was horrible at it. I choose to take 0s instead of even trying. I refused to read my own work in front of the class. Again, I chose to take a 0. I know I'm smart. I've been told that all my life, plus I come from smart people. That makes me terrified to look stupid. That's why I acknowledge accomplishments, even if they aren't up to my standards, rather than exclaim intelligence. If you think you can do anything, you will try anything. If you feel like you have to be smart about it, you won't try those things that you aren't smart about.

There are so many different kinds of intelligence but most people only focus on one kind, academic. I was watching the history of the presidents the other day and they were talking about George W. Bush. A lot of people ridiculed him for not being very intelligent because he wasn't an eloquent speaker and couldn't really think on his toes about technical matters. One guy brought up that he had emotional intelligence. He could size up a person and figure out what they were about and the best way to deal with them very quickly. That's a very important type of intelligence to have but you can't grade or score it and most people don't see it's importance.

[annie2186]

MW - I found the subscribe and save on Amazon with sposies. I do not get the organic ones. Which probably isn't the best thing in the world 

Here:
http://www.amazon.com/Luvs-Ultra-Leakguards-Diapers-Count/dp/B004RFF0O0/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1329868027&sr=8-1

When you do the subscribe and save (you can even cancel before ever getting the shipment again and still get the savings) you get about 15 dollars off. I have only had to buy about 4 boxes which is probably closer to 110 I have spent. I think there was an additional 10 or 15 percent I was getting before for being an amazon mom. Not sure. Obviously I am sure you don't REALLY care since you do cloth!

I am very Catholic. Go to church every Sunday, teach the kids catechism etc. I am a very traditional catholic though. Only Latin is spoken at mass (except the sermon of course) the altar is not facing toward the people, etc. 
 

I was actually quite traumatized when I went to Rome and saw the english mass going on in all of the beautiful basilica's I had heard about my entire life 

I don't know much about evolution. I don't think the earth is millions of years old and I don't believe we evolved from monkeys. However, I do think that you can be Catholic and believe in evolution. 

I remember one time in my high school catechism class at my church there was a convert (someone who became Catholic) who was a seminarian (someone thinking about becoming a priest) and he was a geologist. He said something about being able to believe in evolution (he obviously did) as long as you believed that God made the very first speck or whatever it is you think came first........or whatever. LOL

[onetwoten]

Originally Posted by AnnieA 

Sleep..we had a much better night last night! DD only woke to eat and she never really woke up. Question for you mamas that side-lie nurse at night. Do you pick your baby up? DD seemed to do much better last night when I just left her laying down and fed her that way. She only roused enough to eat and then went right back to sleep. But I feel guilty (I guess that's what I'm feeling) about not picking her up for seven hours. Also, she didn't get her diaper changed that whole time and I feel guilty about that. But if I pick her up to try to feed her, she just gets mad and it wakes her up and then she's up for 1-2 hours in the middle of the night.

Oh and DD ate 8 oz while I was at work and I was able to pump 11 oz. Woohoo!

That's great about the pumping! Every time that happens it's progress!

I'm no good at the side-lying, I can't use it for a whole nurse, only if I've put her down, and she's woken up, and then I bring her back into bed with us, but she needs to nurse for a minute or two to fall back asleep. It's too uncomfortable for me, and I wouldn't last a whole nursing session, so I'm no help. She gets picked up every time, because I have to. But I would think that if she needed more (to be held, moved, cuddled), she'd let you know. That's the relationship you've cultivated through attachment parenting her, is that she knows that if she needs something else, she can ask, and you'll do it for her. Likely, she's fine with just the food, and will get her cuddles and holding in during the day. 

RE: Diaper changes, I was the same. I had it in my head that no, she could -not- sit all night in one diaper, it was just too long. And so she would get changed around 11pm, and then again at either 2-3 or 5-6 when she woke up, and then again at around 8-9. And I found exactly what you did- it upset her, and would mean she was up for much longer stretches at night. Then I realized people on here were always talking about night diapers, and loving co-sleeping because they didn't have to get out of bed, and concluded that they weren't changing their babies at night. I tried it, and she sleeps so much better at night now when we don't try to change her unless she's obviously pooped or has soaked through. I felt bad about it, but again, I'm trusting that if it was bothering her, she would tell me. 

[annie2186]

Originally Posted by AnnieA 

Sleep..we had a much better night last night! DD only woke to eat and she never really woke up. Question for you mamas that side-lie nurse at night. Do you pick your baby up? DD seemed to do much better last night when I just left her laying down and fed her that way. She only roused enough to eat and then went right back to sleep. But I feel guilty (I guess that's what I'm feeling) about not picking her up for seven hours. Also, she didn't get her diaper changed that whole time and I feel guilty about that. But if I pick her up to try to feed her, she just gets mad and it wakes her up and then she's up for 1-2 hours in the middle of the night.

Oh and DD ate 8 oz while I was at work and I was able to pump 11 oz. Woohoo!

What do you mean by "pick up?" A sleeps right next to me in a crib. When I used to nurse her I would grab her out of the crib and then have her lay by me and nurse and then I would put her back in the crib when I (usually) woke up from being uncomfortable. 

Uhhhh - I don't ever change kids during the night. Unless they poop. If I smell it. 

[MarineWife]

[quote name="annie2186" url="/community/t/1343936/february-2012-whatever-ladies-and-babies/240#post_16886140"I don't believe we evolved from monkeys.[/quote]

This is a major misconception about evolution. Evolutionists do not believe that humans evolved from monkeys, either. We do share a majority of our DNA and characteristics, especially when compared to other species, so we most likely had a common ancestor. Not the same at all as us directly evolving from monkeys.

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by annie2186 

What do you mean by "pick up?" A sleeps right next to me in a crib. When I used to nurse her I would grab her out of the crib and then have her lay by me and nurse and then I would put her back in the crib when I (usually) woke up from being uncomfortable. 

Uhhhh - I don't ever change kids during the night. Unless they poop. If I smell it. 

If I don't already have milk pumped and waiting, I pick her up and we go out in to the living room. She has to sit in her rocker while I pump and then I used to feed her on the couch and she would fall asleep and I would put her back in her bed. Then she started refusing bottles that way so she would have to sit and wait while I pumped and then we would go back in the room and I would lay her down and then give her the bottle. If she gets full before she falls asleep, well then we're awake for the next hour or so. Last night, because I had pumped so well at work, I was always ahead of her intake so I always had a bottle waiting when she would stir. I would just give her the bottle, she would not even really wake up while eating and then go back to sleep after she ate the 2 oz or so.

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by MarineWife 

[quote name="annie2186" url="/community/t/1343936/february-2012-whatever-ladies-and-babies/240#post_16886140"I don't believe we evolved from monkeys.[/quote]
This is a major misconception about evolution. Evolutionists do not believe that humans evolved from monkeys, either. We do share a majority of our DNA and characteristics, especially when compared to other species, so we most likely had a common ancestor. Not the same at all as us directly evolving from monkeys.

That's correct MW. Here's a link to the exhibit at the National Museum of Natural History http://humanorigins.si.edu/. MW, I bet your boys would really enjoy that hall, and the whole museum. It's free so when you guys get back up here, you should definitely check it out. You could spend days there checking everything out.

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by annie2186 

I am very Catholic. Go to church every Sunday, teach the kids catechism etc. I am a very traditional catholic though. Only Latin is spoken at mass (except the sermon of course) the altar is not facing toward the people, etc. 
 

I was actually quite traumatized when I went to Rome and saw the english mass going on in all of the beautiful basilica's I had heard about my entire life 

I didn't realize you went to TLM. That's very cool. I've been wanting to go to a TLM but they are offered so infrequently around here. The past few months, I'm lucky to get to Mass once a week. I'd like to go more frequently to get DD used to sitting quietly through it. She does well so far as long as we are sitting close enough for her to watch the priest. She's such a nosy butt!

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by AnnieA 

That's correct MW. Here's a link to the exhibit at the National Museum of Natural History http://humanorigins.si.edu/. MW, I bet your boys would really enjoy that hall, and the whole museum. It's free so when you guys get back up here, you should definitely check it out. You could spend days there checking everything out.

I grew up in NOVA and have been there many times. my mom lives in vienna so i try to take the kids every time we visit. last time kellen was a baby so ethan was probably 4 or 5. they boys always prefer the air & space museum, though, which I find soooo boring!

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by MarineWife 


I grew up in NOVA and have been there many times. my mom lives in vienna so i try to take the kids every time we visit. last time kellen was a baby so ethan was probably 4 or 5. they boys always prefer the air & space museum, though, which I find soooo boring!

I'm not a big fan of the air & space museum either although the Udvar-Hazy out at Dulles is pretty cool. My kids really enjoyed the natural history museum but they are all older readers so it might not be fun for younger ones.

[MarineWife]

This is a good page to read: http://humanorigins.si.edu/resources/intro-human-evolution

[MarineWife]

Originally Posted by AnnieA 

I'm not a big fan of the air & space museum either although the Udvar-Hazy out at Dulles is pretty cool. My kids really enjoyed the natural history museum but they are all older readers so it might not be fun for younger ones.

Even when Ryan was older he still prefered the Air & Space museum.

I can't wait to move back up there so I can take the boys to Mount Vernon and Jamestown and Thomas Jefferson's place (can't believe I can't remember what it's called). My mom has a timeshare in Williamsburg (don't ask me why since she lives only a few miles away) and it's so fun to take the boys there almost every year. Old Town, Alexandria, the National Zoo, all the monuments in D.C.. So much life and history.

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by MarineWife 


Even when Ryan was older he still prefered the Air & Space museum.
I can't wait to move back up there so I can take the boys to Mount Vernon and Jamestown and Thomas Jefferson's place (can't believe I can't remember what it's called). My mom has a timeshare in Williamsburg (don't ask me why since she lives only a few miles away) and it's so fun to take the boys there almost every year. Old Town, Alexandria, the National Zoo, all the monuments in D.C.. So much life and history.

Monticello! I live 10 minutes from Monticello! That's one of my favorite things about living here. We can access so much history, free history, in day trips. And Baltimore isn't too far away either and there are fun things to do there as well. I've never been to Annapolis but I've heard it's really fun too.

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by MarineWife 

This is a good page to read: http://humanorigins.si.edu/resources/intro-human-evolution

Yes, that was a good page. The whole exhibit hall is really well done and really walks you through the timeline of humans.

[MarineWife]

Monticello, yes! When we move back up there we should plan a visit together. Maybe even before we move if we come up to visit again.

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by MarineWife 

Monticello, yes! When we move back up there we should plan a visit together. Maybe even before we move if we come up to visit again.

Absolutely. I haven't been up in a few years but it is always interesting to go. We have lots of fun things to do in C'ville, especially when the weather is nice.

[Baby_Cakes]

Wait - I've been to Williamsburg and Jamestown settlement!  Chris and I also love going to Busch Gardens.  Oh, we should meet up with the kids!!!

[AnnieA]

Originally Posted by Baby_Cakes 

Wait - I've been to Williamsburg and Jamestown settlement!  Chris and I also love going to Busch Gardens.  Oh, we should meet up with the kids!!!

DC/Baltimore wouldn't be that far for you. There's the best children's museum in Baltimore, Port Discovery. http://www.portdiscovery.org/ Even my older kids still love this place. Well, DSS 17 has pretty much outgrown it but the other kids still love it!