How's everyone doing??? - Page 3

[demoonunit]

We're doing pretty okay. Nem is a very easy baby, although when she's upset she wants the whole world to hear it! (Never heard a baby scream so loud--yikes!) Right now I'm struggling with the whole co-sleeping thing. I've been loving sleeping with her so I can make sure she's breathing and it's much easier for those night nursings, but I want to get her out of the bed because there's not much room and she's only going to get bigger. Not to mention that I know I won't roll on her, but my man is a very heavy sleeper and I worry about that. I have a bassinet right next to the bed, I just find it so much easier to have her in bed with me...but I'm scared that I'll be creating a little sleepy monster that will be sleeping with me until she's 5!!! (No offense to the ladies who co-sleep older children...it's just not something I want).

[Kaitlyn811]

*rubs eyes* I'm here. Jeez time flies.

I'm pretty sure we're doing good, and adjusting fairly well. Much like pregnancy, I have to ignore ignorant and uneducated comments about my parenting skills. Mom's coworker came over yesterday to visit with us and Baby V and I always state outright that I co-sleep. It makes it so mcuh easier, not only do I like being so close to her but when she stirs in the night I wake up before she cries so it keeps the house quiet whereas if she were down the hall in her crib she'd be crying her heart out before I could get there.

Said coworker basically implied that spoils the child, that they'll be needy and co-dependent later in life (funny, I just read an article the other day that those are both false and actually the opposite). My God why is it so awful to some people that parents sleep with their infant?

Anyway, I'm totally in love. I actually think (though sometimes I miss it) enjoy it just being me and her in bed. I don't have to worry that someone else will roll on her.

My dad likes to remind me that humans are the only mammals that have a child and then stick it at the end of the hallway and listen to it through a monitor. So it makes me feel better.

On another note, I'm part of the "exclusive pumpers" club. Baby V had such a poor latch, she was so lazy on the boob, and I hated having to try and put a nipple shield on all while she was crying (and then it wouldn't stick!) - it just wasn't working out for us. Next best thing? Pumping (yay for not having to give formula). I find this to be a good fit for us. I can monitor how much she's eating (since I had weighed her and nearly had a meltdown when she lost more weight) and she seems to be doing so much better this way. As am I.

Alright, I chattered enough I think lol (:

[montessorimama1]

Kaitlyn - Can I just say I love your dad's perspective!!!  He makes a great point... I'm glad you are doing what you feel is best for your particular situation.

I was going to write more but someone is wiggling in his Moby... It's dinnertime!!!  

[Sweet.Bee]

chili, I am still bleeding at 5 weeks PP. It comes and goes in intensity. I have noticed that I bleed more when I've been active (walking around, out shopping for long stretches, etc.). Maybe this is the case for you?

Kaitlyn, people are stupid sometimes. Our first (now 2.5 years old) slept with us for the first few months. To fall asleep, he needed to be rocked on one of our laps. I gradually moved him to his own bed, and he's been an excellent sleeper for about 2 years now. I think once he realized I would always be nearby, he was ok with sleeping on his own.

[juneboymum]

Kaitlyn - Your dad is one smart guy!  I always say I wished humans acted like real mammals!  My 2.5 yr old slept with us for a couple years and now sleeps in his own room.  He's a very independent, confident little boy (which is how many attachment parented kids are).  You are doing the right thing if that's what feels natural for you!

Today Eli had his 2 week check up and he weighed almost 10 lbs!!!  2 lbs gained in 13 days!  His ped said it's some kind of record but she was very pleased.  I guess I've birthed a linebacker!  My older son is, and always has been, in the 5th percentile for weight and Eli is 90th!  It's crazy how different they already are!

After his appointment, Eli and I walked to a playgroup in our neighborhood that I normally can't go to because of work.  It was great to see some other AP friends.

Tomorrow will be my first day with Eli and my 2.5 yr old....wish me luck!  We are going to the chiro in the AM and hoping to survive the PM!!  Ha Ha.

Hope everyone is doing well.  Time to feed the linebacker!

[rtjunker]

As for the co-sleeping thing, has anyone else gotten the lectures about how it's extremely dangerous and akin to child abuse? Followed with a story of how a friend of a friend smothered their baby that way? I'm so tired of it. Kaitlyn's dad puts it perfectly for me.

[contactmaya]

I just use a snugglenest and feel that is safe. I never done anything but co sleep. My two older boys, 3 and 6, still co sleep. My only struggle with co sleeping now is fitting everyone in. Both ds1 and 2 have their own bed, but my 3yo always crawls back into bed with me. I have a queen size bed , and baby in snuggle nest against the wall. I will be getting a king size soon. I am in between baby and 3yo.

Gosh, the day after birth i was getting up early and getting my 6yo ready for his early bus. My mother was supposed to be doing that, but i had so much energy., This continued for 2 days. Nursing was a breeze, even though there was only  colostrum. Im like-this is so easy. Until...

my milk came in and my breast swelled up, and my left nipple hurt so much. I knew the answer was to nurse more often, and i did, but it was so painful!!!

Then the fatigue hit me. Babe wakes me up alot at night, but every so often, i get a few hours sleep in a row. Then i fell great!

So far, no  inconsolable crying bouts, baby is easily settled, loves being held, LOVES nursing. She takes it VERY seriously. As soon as she latches, she has this very serious look in her eyes, its SO CUTE. Shes right of course, survival is serious business.

The harder thing for me at this point is dealing with my other kids. I have my mother and sister here to help, but i want to do things with them as well.

Do you find you crave sweet things all the time? Im  really into  eating sweets right now.

[bentlaj11]

Originally Posted by rtjunker 

As for the co-sleeping thing, has anyone else gotten the lectures about how it's extremely dangerous and akin to child abuse? Followed with a story of how a friend of a friend smothered their baby that way? I'm so tired of it. Kaitlyn's dad puts it perfectly for me.

I haven't had any conversations w/ people, but I was getting our local PSA about safe co-sleeping (as in room sharing but not bed sharing) almost everytime I got up w/ LO and turned on the t.v. in the middle of the night. It really was starting to get me worried... that's why I wrote the other post about not waking w/ every little sound. I sleep so good w/ him beside me that it had me worried! I only room shared w/ DS1 and he was at the foot of the bed and I woke up w/ every little peep and even when he wasn't making any noise.

Juneboymum- it is really interesting how different they can be! Mine were the opposite of yours... DS1 was always 95+ % for everything and DS2 is only 5-10%. He gained 3 lbs in a month, though so he's trying to catch up to big brother!
 

[Kaitlyn811]

I've never gotten the child abuse thing, but I've gotten the "it makes them manipulative" "they will be needy when they're older" "you know thats how SIDS happens"

I really just want to say F off, I'm the parent. Thanks. But instead I just sit there and listen to them sound like fools.

Even in the hospital, Baby V and I didn't like being away from one another. She WOULD NOT sleep in the bassinet. So she slept with me, the nurses didn't like it but it still remains - she's MY child.

When we came home from the hospital I couldn't bear the thought of her sleeping in her crib down the hall, alone, in the dark, without me. Co-sleeping works for us. I understand it doesn't work for everyone, just like breastfeeding didn't work for me, so now I just pump.

Much like any mom, I hate hearing my child cry so I love to have her near me so I can fix whatever is bothering her. It also helps (me personally anyway) that I have a memory foam mattress so it's not likely to sag anywhere so the risk of her rolling around because of the mattress is pretty rare and that makes ME feel better even though now my body knows she's in the bed with me so I don't move at all now. (:

[coldandsleepy]

I think the biggest thing I hear about co-sleeping (both with  my first son and this little guy) is "oh you'll NEVER get him out of your bed!"  We transitioned my older son out right before Thanksgiving (at a little over 2 years old) and you know what?  It wasn't hard at all.  He was ready for his own space.  And now I have a retort for people who are like "you know you're setting yourself up for disaster later!" etc-- no, you aren't, not necessarily!

Emotionally I feel great (and physically, too) this time around, and I attribute a lot of that to the fact that I am getting reasonable amounts of sleep-- 3 hours here, 3 hours there-- which would not be doable for us without cosleeping & sidelying nursing!

[AlwaysPraying]

i want to type but i cant :D bubs is in my arms all the time :)

[montessorimama1]

OK, babe is finally asleep in the Moby so I can type... Glad to read about the co-sleeping transition success stories.  We're not co-sleeping all night, he sleeps next to our bed in a floor bassinet (our bed is a full and we're tall people) but I bring him into bed at 5am because he gets fussy then and I'm dying for a couple more hours of sleep.  I am not sure how long we'll do this but it's nice to know that transitioning doesn't have to be a nightmare.

I think we made it past the 3-week growth spurt, which was not fun at all for mommy and her boobies.  It was non-stop nursing, even at night he would wake up every 90 minutes - starving!!  Last night he slept in 3-hour stretches and right now he's been doing a lot of napping throughout the morning, which makes me think that it's the sleeping part of the growth spurt.  He's such a big boy (at least 12 lbs. @ 3.5 weeks of age!) that it's not surprising he needs so much food.  Thankfully my milk has kept pace with his demands... I love my body!!!  :)

Hubby has been wanting to... get intimate... for several days now.  I'm trying to explain to him that I just pushed out a 10-pounder, so the thought of anything going IN where that boy came OUT is not a pleasant one right now (especially since I tore and had to have stitches followed by Super Glue - yes, I got my crotch super-glued together, haha).  Also, I am not about to sacrifice my sleep for anything, not even sex, so I'm trying to explain to him that we can schedule some intimate time on the weekend during the day when baby is taking a nap.  Never thought I'd be scheduling sex... And of course the boobies are off limits, I can't even have him get his hands near them without cringing!  Ugh, I used to enjoy sex... What happened?????

Hope everyone's doing well with their munchkins and getting some sleep!!  Happy Valentine's day!!

[juneboymum]

Happy Valentine's Day! 

So far we are surviving the day on our own...but, man, could I use a nap!  DS1 was so cooperative and helpful this AM.  I started getting everyone ready to leave the house for the chiro 2 hours before the appt and we made it on time.  I hope a little adjustment will help Eli's latch because I'm still suffering.  Ibuprofen is the only thing keeping it tolerable.  On Thursday I have a LC coming over for an evaluation and to see if we can help his latch.  My chiro wondered if he has a tongue-tie but she couldn't tell for sure.  He's certainly getting enough milk based on his weight gain!  I feel so silly since I just nursed for 2.5 yrs - seems like I should be able to figure out the newborn stage of nursing again!

As for co-sleeping, we don't bedshare until the baby is older because we have a soft, pillow-top mattress that I don't feel safe letting the baby sleep on.  He sleeps about 1 1/2 feet away from me in a pack and play with a bassinet top.  He's about level with the bed and only an arm's reach away.  Once he's old enough to start crawling out of that, I feel safer with him in bed with us.  I wish we could afford a new mattress so he could sleep with us!

Anyone doing anything special for Valentine's Day?  I could eat a whole box of chocolates right now...if only I had some!

[wombjuice]

Alright, I'm going to finish a post if it kills me!

Baby girl is a little over one month old now!  She was 6lbs 12oz at birth (Jan 12th), and now she weighs 10lbs (as of this morning)!!  I make TONS of milk, which is good because her latch is not so good.  She has a LONG tongue, and no frenulum (seriously, none at all), and I'm wondering if that has anything to do with the fact that she cannot maintain good suction most of the time.  Also, I am small with very large, soft breasts, so I have to hold my breast the whole time she eats or my nipple just flops out of her mouth.  I didn't really have any nipple pain until about a week ago, and now my nipples are sore.  I'm going to a La Leche League meeting this Thursday to see if anyone can help me.

I had to cut a bunch of foods out of my diet because at around 2 weeks old, she was getting really gassy at around 2am every night.  I'm already vegan, and after cutting out soy, wheat, corn, onions, garlic, beans, peanuts, cruciferous veggies (broccoli, cabbage, etc.)...I'm back on 100% raw vegan.  I was worried that my milk supply might go down (and maybe that would be a good thing?  I think I have an oversupply...), but it didn't!  Not at all!  And now the weight is just falling off me and going right to the baby.  And the gassiness pretty much went away!  Yay!

DH and I haven't really done much other than spend time with our new little lovebug.  I've been skyping my classes and DH does online school, so we've only really gone out to do small errands.  But, next week is my first day back to school, and it's a 3-hour commute.  That wouldn't be all that bad if baby girl didn't absolutely HATE the carseat.  She screams her head off in it and turns purple.  It's horrible!!  So I broke down and bought an orthodontic pacifier...I haven't opened it yet, but I've decided I'm going to give it to her the next time we ride in the car.  It will be for car rides only.  I've been really torn about this because I simply did not want to give her a pacifier...but I can't give her the breast while she's riding in her car seat, so I don't feel I have much of a choice.

That's all I can think of for now!  Happy Valentine's Day, Mamas!!

[LindsayEM]

M, do you have pandora on your phone that you can hook in to your car or anything?  It was a lifesaver when I was going to school with Aiden - the station Renee and Jeremy seems to soothe even the biggest car seat haters.  Misti and I would ride together, with 3 newborns who at various times would be totally not content in the carseat (granted, our ride was only 1.5 hours, but still), and that station saved our sanity for sure!  Hopefully she'll be alright for you on the drive :)

[AfricanQueen99]

It's a sad valentine's day around here.  My husband is away for work and my daughter was sent home today sick.  I think we're going to have a "do over" next week!

We're another positive co-sleeping story.  My kids are allowed to co-sleep until around 6 months...then they're off to their rooms.  It's never been an issue.  Once they transition to their "big kid" bed (+/- 2 yrs) they're allowed to come in anytime, but they're both content in their own spaces.  In fact, when sick or anything and encouraged to sleep with us they generally go back to their own space in the middle of the night!

Pilar - just to warn you, the first few times of being intimate aren't spectacular.  I've been able to feel the stitch line pull and tug (3 kids worth of stitches = Frankenstein girly bits!).  Just go slow and use a bit of coconut oil to help things.  It does get better - I promise!

[chilichiki]

Frankenstein bits....the mental picture I have is cracking me up...  I wonder how frightening mine is down there now that there is 2 kids worth of stitches....eek!!

DH is also dropping hints about wanting to have sex...and I just shake my head and tell him we are waiting AT LEAST until after my six week check up.  Hell, I sit on the toilet seat awkwardly and I can feel my stitches tug...there is no way I am even going to contemplate being intimate anytime in the near future!!

DH, myself, and baby went out to eat while DS1 was in preschool.  Henry slept the whole time- yay!!  It was nice to get out and do something adult for a bit, even if there was a baby with us :o)

I ordered some cloth diapers the other day and am waiting patiently for their arrival.  While we were out I also picked up some new nursing bras...compared to my old ones, these are absolutely heavenly. Ah, the things I get excited about these days...

[Marinwoo]

We are doing well.  It's been so long since I've been on here, time flies! LO is sleeping for longer stretches at night which is great for me :)

I think I have one of those babies that would nurse all day if she could.  I had to introduce a pacifier because she was demanding my boobs all. the. time. but she gets upset when the milk flows (obviously except when she's actually hungry). The pacifier has been my lifesaver for bedtime though.  She has learned to put herself to sleep with just a little help from me (rocking her).  Before the pacifier I would have to rock her for like 40 minutes every time she woke up!  I kind of hate the pacifier though.  I sometimes worry that I'm just "shutting her up" with it.  I try not to give it too much but some days all she wants to do is suck!

I've tried to put her on her stomach to strengthen those muscles but she hates it.  She usually starts wailing almost immediately, anyone else have a baby who hates stomach lying?

We are CDing during the day and using disposable at night for absorbency purposes.  I would like to find a good CD system for night time. Also, LO blows out the legs of her cloth diapers.  I started putting the snappy lower, across her hips which seems to help.  Is there any other way to keep the poop in? :)

[element2012]

Marinwoo my girl's a sucker too, but she won't really take to a pacifier. I have to use my finger to get her to sleep (eventually) at night.

Please tell me it's normal that they cry so much... today has been tough.

[montessorimama1]

Marinwoo - Z. also hates tummy time with a passion.  He has a meltdown every time we try, but if he's on his daddy's chest he's perfectly content to hang out on his tummy.  So now my husband is an activity mat.    And yes, we're using disposables at night, too.  I found that Z. would wake up much more frequently at night with cloth diapers (he's a big wetter), and for my sanity and until he sleeps more deeply I decided that a few disposables weren't going to kill anyone.  We do what we can, right?
 

Originally Posted by element2012 

Marinwoo my girl's a sucker too, but she won't really take to a pacifier. I have to use my finger to get her to sleep (eventually) at night.
Please tell me it's normal that they cry so much... today has been tough.

Element - We do the finger, too (well, hubby mostly because baby doesn't like my finger... He probably figured out it belongs to the same body that has the boobs!).  It's a lot better developmentally than the pacifier.  And yes, they cry.  It's their way of communicating (well, one way) and sometimes all you can do is cry along with them.  Hang in there, I've been told it gets better! 

I am over the moon today because I finally figured out what works for my baby to nap and sleep at night!  It's a topponcino (http://thefullmontessori.wordpress.com/2012/02/16/topponcino/), and when combined with white noise it is the biggest blessing EVER!!  He's been asleep for over an hour, which is an all-time record for daytime.  And at night it works just as well, even when he is over-tired and fussy.  

Today we had our first mommy & baby outing in the car; we dropped off daddy at work, went to Target and then I grabbed lunch at In N' Out (local burger joint) and ate in the back of the car while I b/f Z.  It was pretty cool.  He loves his carseat and fell asleep on the way back home, so I kept driving for about 30 minutes, down to the ocean and through all the pretty side streets of La Jolla.  Soooo relaxing!!  Then we came home, I gave him a leg massage, fed him, and he ZONKED OUT!  It almost makes up for yesterday, which was hands down the Most Difficult Day Ever, when NOTHING seemed to work and it was raining so I couldn't take him for a walk in the Moby (which always works).  And honestly, pacing around our tiny condo with a screaming baby in a Moby was going to make me insane.  Funny how things can be so different from one day to the next!!

Hope everyone's getting some sleep!!