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Finding out the gender - Page 3

Poll Results: Are you hoping to find out your baby's gender before birth?

 
  • 20% (9)
    Yes as soon as possible!
  • 46% (20)
    Sure. During my routine ultrasound.
  • 6% (3)
    We haven't decided yet/Partner wants one thing, I want another
  • 25% (11)
    Nope! We want to be surprised!
43 Total Votes  
post #41 of 91

Great ideas!  Sallyrae17, I have a lot of gender neutral stuff from last time too, but it's all WINTER stuff!  Argh, why didn't I time that better, lol! 

 

I like the suggestions for whites or blacks and some good rock-n-roll shirts.  I've found a few Carters gender neutral things, but my problem with them is that we cloth diaper and I can't get a lot of them to fit over a cloth diaper and my chubby babies!  I love Hanna Andersson clothes because they usually fit over the diapers, but they have very little that isn' t obviously girl/boy.

 

I'll probably just get a few basics to start, make a few neutral wool longies, and then wait to buy the full winter wardrobe till after the baby comes.  Last time, I got tons of clothes at the baby shower (AFTER dd was born), but I'm not counting on that this time, since it seems like around here, people rarely throw showers for anyone but the first child.

post #42 of 91
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by dovemama View Post

After being a gender studies major in college I had so many strong feelings about what and how I would address my child and dress my child. Turns out, she is her own person no matter what color she wears. And her favorite thing so far is playing in the sandbox, or chasing dogs, or eating cheerios. The clothes and toys don't matter at all. We are just thankful for the generosity of others.

 



Dovemama - so nice to hear you say this. I minored in Queer Theory/Gender Studies and have such strong feelings about it as well... I was really kinda stressing about how my politics would meet the challenges of actually parenting. I would like, as much as possible, to shield my child from stereotypes and gendered expectations - it is a relief to hear you express how little the clothes are influencing your child!

post #43 of 91
This is our 3rd baby and we have waited with all of them.
post #44 of 91

Actually I found that my daughter looks GREAT in blue! Although we have been given an incredible amount of clothes for her from newborn to 4T, it's also nice to re-use some things from her older brothers :)

post #45 of 91
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tizzy View Post

Actually I found that my daughter looks GREAT in blue! Although we have been given an incredible amount of clothes for her from newborn to 4T, it's also nice to re-use some things from her older brothers :)

 

Some of the cutest things on my daughter were "boys" clothes.
 :)
 

I think I will not be reusing her really stereotypical girl clothes, I have a lot of issues with gender stereotyping that I didn't used to have when she was a baby 5 years ago.  Black is really cute on babies but it's actually really hard to find I've found.  I've started going through all the hand me downs I have stored away and I've already given away some of the really stereotypical stuff.


Edited by SomethingAnonymous - 2/15/12 at 2:18pm
post #46 of 91

The gender stereotyping convos crack me up.  I MEAN no offense, seriously. I had all girls till my son. Then had another girl, so he's surrounded by girls.  And we are talkign GIRLY GIRLS.  Not a tom boy in the bunch. Some are MORE girly than others but there is not a girl who loves even wearing blue jeans.

 

My youngest LOVES to put on frilly dresses and clips and sandals.  And his next oldest sister, LOVES those fluffy skirts and loves pinks and rainbows.

 

So anyway, we watch a LOT of fairy movies and princess movies.  (I HATE princess movies.)  He'll pick things like Cloudy with a chance of Meatballs, which everyone likes but it's not a fairy movie. He watches them, no doubt, and loves them too.

 

Well one day, an older sister was watchign Narnia...a fight scene.  There is not a whole lot of fighting in our home, as you can imagine with a bunch of girly girls.  and he had never seen a movie with fighting because it scares his younger sisters.  anyway, ever since he saw that fighting scene THAT is the only thing he wants to watch.  FIGHTING.  So I dont think there is a whole lot we can do to change these things.  NO DOUBT not every boy is going to love fighting.  LOL  I think you know what I mean.

I'm waiting ot find out. 

 

My 2 biggest reasons:  I dont REALLY, TRULY know how save US are.  I know that will cause an uproar.  LOL

 

I LOVE surprises.  I know it's a surprise no matter what, but like someone else said, it's the difference in unwrapping your presents in October or waiting for Christmas.

 

I'm a HUGE planner.  But I just buy gender neutral clothes.  My MIL goes and buys one really cute boy or girl outfit the day the baby is born so we can have pretty pictures. By a week or two, people have delivered clothes for us. LOL

Also, some were talking about being let down by the gender.  Here's my story.

 

We had 4 girls and then a son.  Then pregnant again.  We ReALLY REALLY wanted a brother for our son. SO BADLY.  So when she was born and we saw it was a she, we WERE disappointed...for about 20 seconds. and then we were excited that we had a beautiful baby girl. 

 

So that's us.  I know other people might be more disappointed than we were, but it wasnt that big a deal. 

 

and if we have another girl, we'll probably be disappointed again...LOL...but only for a few seconds.  and then we'll be happy. 

One more thing...I HATE when people make the comments about Oh you really must want a boy, when they see all our daughters.  I HATE that because my daughters are JUST as important as my son is.  You know?  Someone else mentioned that, but it's true.

post #47 of 91

It's not so much that I would care if one of my kids showed an interest in something that is considered to be expected for their gender- I just do not want to choose for them. I want to give them a neutral start so that they can pick for themselves what they like when they are old enough to express it.

post #48 of 91
Quote:
Originally Posted by intime0 View Post

My 2 biggest reasons:  I dont REALLY, TRULY know how save US are.  I know that will cause an uproar.  LOL

 

 

I would be surprised if it caused an uproar. LOL  Truth is, I've been here a long time, and it used to be that very few of our members had routine u/s.  I'm always surprised at how the conversations have changed here. :)  I don't know how truly safe they are either.  

 

But then I don't know how safe a lot of stuff is, and in my case, I feel this is the best way to make sure that I am aware of anything that would require special accommodations when the baby is born. (placenta previa, health issues, etc)

 

But I can't imagine being like a couple of my friends who had them nearly every month.  

post #49 of 91

For those looking for gender-neutral basic baby clothes, tshirt wholesalers (for example, http://www.blankapparel.com/Youth_Infant-Toddler.htm%7CWCZHAYZBRNT7RVSU40954.8110199768) often have onesies/tees/etc in bright or neutral colors, and they do quantity discounts (mix & match) so it's economical. 

 

I share the fears some of you have about people immediately gendering my baby upon knowing what kind of genitals it has. Yet, I want to find out. So I think before we tell, we'll just get an agreement from our families (the most likely culprits) that they not send us things that blatantly reinforce gender stereotypes (for me, this is "princess" or "little man" on shirts, etc) though I'll have to word it differently. I might also say we'd prefer gender neutral things in case we have a 2nd child. 

 

I guess I also have fears about how *my* thoughts/actions toward my child will change based on their sex. But finding out at birth would only delay that. And... I'd really like some time to prepare for how the world is going to react to my child, and to think about the challenges of raising a boy or a girl. And there are still some things I might make/buy for a girl that I wouldn't for a boy and vice versa based on how that would be perceived (and not wanting to get into it with people over it - I gotta pick my battles). 

post #50 of 91

We will be finding out March 7th and I am psyched :)  We found out with our first 2 (both girls) and really think this one is a boy.  I think it is fun when people wait; Im just so excited to find out!

post #51 of 91

We will find out 3/5, if baby cooperates of course. smile.gif I was surprised with my first, and found out at the 18-wk anatomy scan with my second, and I felt like the delight in finding out was equal for us in both cases. My son still wore his fair share of hand-me-down pink sleepers despite us knowing ahead of time that he was a boy, though. We didn't tell anyone his sex even though we knew, so we didn't get overloaded with gendered clothing until he was older.

 

My kids both want a girl. DH thinks it's a girl too, but has no preference. I have no feelings either way (well, I do have hunches, but they change from day to day!).

post #52 of 91

Ultrasound is scheduled for 3/14, and we'll find out then as long as the baby cooperates! I'll post pictures from the gender reveal party when we have it. orngbiggrin.gif

post #53 of 91

This is baby #4. I found out with the first one but not with baby #2, or #3. We won't find out till birth for this one either. Since I have now done both I think it is a much greater surprise when you find out at birth. I had a midwife with 2 and 3 and she did not announce the sex when the baby was born. She let my husband and I discover that on our own. It was beyond AMAZING to discover if we had a daughter or a son together in that quiet moment soon after birth, without someone telling us.

 

I am also a planner but think this is one time in life where everything does not have to be planned. Our nursery was done in a precious jungle theme and we have neutral clothing. The baby does not care what it is dressed in so I don't feel the need to have a lot of pink or blue on hand.

post #54 of 91

How did you guys get it scheduled already?!! Yay! So super excited for you all!

post #55 of 91

I have to go in every two weeks for my OB to look at my blood sugar and make insulin dose changes if needed, so it's pretty easy for me to get stuff scheduled in advance.

post #56 of 91

I found the video of the Gender Reveal Party.  You can see that everyone is wearing either blue or pink (or both). Everyone was asked to wear either pink or blue according to what their guess was as to the sex.  

 

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=2630820172670

post #57 of 91

I've started to make a list of what I want to do for ours. I think it will be low-key, probably at a local park (assuming the weather is good, which it usually is in March in Tucson). I'll make a cake with the colored filling. We'll do a posterboard so we can tally all the guesses. Having people wear pink or blue is a great idea! I think it's going to be a "playdate with cake" more than anything, Maybe we'll do it potluck style.

post #58 of 91

We're finding out. For me, its going to help me bond- SIMPLY because i haven't yet. Its like, I have a toddler who basically is all "IN YOUR FACE I NEED YOU NOW ALL THE TIME" and finding out, we can start calling the baby by its name. I HATE surprises. In fact, I told my husband if he EVER has a "surprise party" for me, I will walk out and serve him with divorce papers. I seriously HATE surprises. 

 

My SIL and BIL wanted to find out, but baby didn't cooperate. However, they are keeping the name secret until birth which i think is sweet, but i'm horrid at keeping secrets. 

post #59 of 91
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cecilia's Mama View Post

I've started to make a list of what I want to do for ours. I think it will be low-key, probably at a local park (assuming the weather is good, which it usually is in March in Tucson). I'll make a cake with the colored filling. We'll do a posterboard so we can tally all the guesses. Having people wear pink or blue is a great idea! I think it's going to be a "playdate with cake" more than anything, Maybe we'll do it potluck style.



That is exactly what my sis did, potluck with cake.

post #60 of 91

My friends did a twist on a gender-reveal party.  They had the ultrasound technician write the gender on a paper and put it in an envelope but not tell them. Then that night they had a party with a bunch of their friends, where they opened the envelope, and found out along with everyone else.   Personally, I'm more for finding out in private, but it's definitely a fun option to consider, and I might use the technique of having the ultrasound technician write the gender down without telling me, if it turns out my husband can't come to the ultrasound, since I would like us to find out together. 

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