baby hates the car question...

[Annie Thibodeau]

hi all,

i do a lot of reading these forums, but don't post very often, but i do have a question that i hope some of you may be able to help with. dd HATES the car. she seems to be ok if i am in the back with her, with my face really close to her, but unfortunately dh is usually at work when i have to go out.   i know that there isn't a whole lot i can do about it, as i have tried everthing, but i am wondering, will she get used to it faster if i plan to go out at least once a day, or should i just go out when it is absolutly nessacary? everytime i do leave the house wih her i swear i will never leave again, it is absolutly heartbreaking listening to her cry. i can't stand it, and obv. she can't either...but there are times when going in the car is unavoidable. anyone have any advise?
 

[Maurine]

DS hated his infant car seat until 4 months when we switched to a convertible car seat out of desperation. I had heard that sometimes babies like them better, and it TOTALLY worked! He was much happier with more room to breathe and a better view out the car window. He still has his moment of crying, but on the whole it was a major improvement.

[Annie Thibodeau]

thanks, that's encouraging!  so i'll just have to move her to a convertible sooner than later...

[Peony]

I'm on my 4th carseat hater and moving to a convertible has never worked but I always still try. It gets better some when they can play with toys. DS2 is 6 months and he usually will play with toys for maybe 5 minutes before the wailing starts, an improvement anyway over him waiting as soon as I put him in the seat! I have to go out, 3 other kids, school pick up. etc... I try really hard to keep my trips to a minimum but it obviously hasn't worked to get him used to it, he still just hates that car. With my first I had the option to just stay him during the week and i mostly only went out on the weekends when DH was around to drive so I could ride in the back. 

[Sweet.Bee]

My son hated the infant car seat. Since we switched to a bigger one, he loves it. I think he did not like the position (lying vs sitting) and view (back vs front-facing) of the infant car seat. He likes to look out the window and see everything that is going on.

Our little girl (5 weeks) hates being put in the car seat but is usually ok once she is moving. I think it depends a lot of the child's temperament.

[Hymanroth]

My son was the SAME way. He hated his carseat so much. I never knew if it was just that carseat (infant seat) or if it was being in the car ... 

The only thing that would soothe him so I could actually go anywhere was white noise. I bought it in iTunes and have 100's of songs on my iPhone that I plug into the cord and plays in my car speakers. He loves ocean waves and cradle melody. Still loves them. 

When he was 5 months old (he is 6 months old this week) we switched to a convertible carseat instead of the infant seat. He never cries in the seat ... so maybe he like this open seat better? 

Only disadvantage is that I cannot carry it inside with him asleep in the seat ... so I end up driving around  lol ... now I have books and stuff to keep me entertained while he sleeps in his seat b/c he ALWAYS falls asleep in his seat now :)

[wendizbaby]

My 1st son was the same way and as others have said, got better with the convertible car seat.  He got even better once he was turned around.  I was just thinking about how awful it was with him the other day and I realized that he gets really bad motion sickness in the car even to this day.  Every time we go on a road trip, he ends up vomiting at least once.  I wonder if there is a correlation?  

[MrsGregory]

My little girl hates her car seat, and after one super-bad meltdown, I decided to start using her stroller with the car-seat attachment, and now I ask her if she wants to go somewhere fun whenever I'm strapping her in.  I strap her in inside, so I think she's anticipating a walk instead of being stuck in the car.  She has her favorite toy, and I play her favorite music for her (T. Rex) and sing along.  She still complains if we get stuck at a light or in traffic.  But I generally just try to make as many positive associations as possible with the carseat.  Some might call this bribery.  I can't stand to hear her cry and not be able to comfort her.

[behaviourmama]

I'm on my second "hates the car" baby. Once she started to really look at objects and notice things in her environment, and she LOVED her mobile, i ran a ribbon from one side of the car to the other, right over her carseat. I tied them to the handles above the seats (don't know what those things are called??). then i hung a couple of toys from them using more ribbon. i found one really good chime one that was light. then i hung a short string to the 3YO's seat, so she could pull on it and make the toys jingle, and a longer one that i ran to the front of the car. totally safe; i could still drive two handed, but one finger was wrapped around the ribbon, and i could drive and pull. usually this kept her distracted enough to prevent a full out wail, and eventually she started to watch it enough that she'd fall asleep to it. babies who hate the car are the WORST!! and I know the guilt thing.. I'd often pull over, call DH crying because I'd feel like such a bad mother for taking her in the car. I don't think practice or staying home is the right answer; just time! do what finds a balance.. do the best you can for your baby.. but if you're going crazy and would just have a better day getting in the car and going somewhere, then do it!

[branditopolis]

I have the same problem!! DS hates hates hates his seat.  usually he's in a good mood so we can get maybe 5-10 min away from the house without him screaming bloody murder but that's it.  and on the way back home he always starts straight away.  He'll stop if I pull over and sit with him and most times I have to cuddle him and/or feed him before i can buckle him back in, drive for a few more minutes, then pull over and do it again.  a 15min trip turns into an hour long trip every time.  I can't drive with him wailing in the back, I have anxiety issues and it turns my brain into scrambled eggs.  My whole family (who is convinced I'm involved in some new-age hippy cult and am doing every single thing to raise my son wrong to spite them) insists all babies love the car and there must be something I'm doing wrong.  I'm so glad to hear I'm not the only one with this problem!