or Connect
Mothering › Groups › May 2012 Birth Club › Discussions › <3 Spotlight on.... JynxGirl Feb 12-14 <3

<3 Spotlight on.... JynxGirl Feb 12-14 <3

post #1 of 14
Thread Starter 

Welcome to your Spotlight on thread, JynxGirl!

 

Some starter questions:

 

Where do you live?

What do you do (day job, profession, SAHM, etc.)?

How did you select your MDC name?

How many children do you have?

 

Ladies, ask away!

 

post #2 of 14

 

Where do you live? 

 

I live in a suburb of Toronto Ontario, about half an hour away from the main part of the city. We bought a 111 year old house almost two years ago, and while there's still a lot of work to do on it, I love this place. We have a huge yard, a swimming pool that causes me all kinds of frustration and grief but that I love to bits, and a fairly decent neighborhood.

 

What do you do (day job, profession, SAHM, etc.)?

 

Right now, I'm a stay at home mom. I own a business that teaching American Sign Language to Infants and Toddlers (using the Signing Time program) and I hope to get it up and running again after the little one is born. 

 

How did you select your MDC name?

 

I've been JynxGirl in one form or another online since 1990-something. It was my nickname in grade school. 

 

How many children do you have?

 

Right now, I have one daughter, who is almost 9. This baby makes number 2. :) 

post #3 of 14

Did you plan this much of an age gap in between your children? I know you got remarried at some point, but I don't know how that factored into things or when it happened.

 

Did you grow up in the GTA, or did you move there at some point?

 

Do you find you really feel "at home" in your current area?

 

Do you know a lot of sign language- could you converse fluently with a deaf person- or is it just the basics?

post #4 of 14

 

Did you plan this much of an age gap in between your children? I know you got remarried at some point, but I don't know how that factored into things or when it happened.

 

Oh, I really didn't. I wanted my kids no more than 3 years apart, because I know how hard it is to have your older sister be 5 years older than you and your next nearest sibling be almost 4 years younger... But between 8 miscarriages, her autism diagnosis, my divorce and then 5 years single... 

 

No, no I didn't plan this big of an age gap. :P 

 

Did you grow up in the GTA, or did you move there at some point?

 

LMAO!! I am laughing, because almost everyone asks me this at some point and I'm never sure how to answer. I was born in the middle of nowhere in Northern Canada and then my family worked their way across Canada. I always swore I'd go back "home" to where my family all lived when I got old enough. But it just never really worked that way. So I settled actually about 45 minutes north of here after my marriage fell apart, and then in the town I'm in now when my husband and I realized we needed to move slightly closer to Toronto for him to be able to continue working. 

 

Do you find you really feel "at home" in your current area?

 

I really do actually, which is surprising to me, because I'm not a fan of cities. I spent a lot of time on farms, and I thought that's what I wanted. But it's a great city and the home we've got here is a big part of how I feel. 

 

Do you know a lot of sign language- could you converse fluently with a deaf person- or is it just the basics?

 

I actually know enough to carry on conversations, grammar and syntax and the like, but it would be a very frustrating conversation for a fluent person, as I'm very, dreadfully slow. There's a woman who works at our local Walmart who is Deaf and she and I occasionally say halloo at each other. She thinks I'm hilarious when I apologize for being so slow, and I think she's a speed signer.

post #5 of 14

How many kids do you want?

What is your life's ambition? 

What do you want to be remembered for?

If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?

 

How did you become a ST instructor?  Not the process, but how did you decide to do that?  After 2+ years of ST and facing another 2+, I'm thinking about it myself. 

 

post #6 of 14

 

How many kids do you want?

 

I WANT a million, but chances are, I will have two. :P I loved having a big family, and really only wish we were all closer. 

 

What is your life's ambition? 

 

I really don't know anymore. I know that sounds pathetic, but I used to have some really big dreams, and then I had my daughter and lot of them faded. Then they came back, and now, buried at the back of my mind are dreams of becoming an physical anthropologist and a novelist. 

 

What do you want to be remembered for?

 

I really want to be remembered for being a brilliant woman. Much as I say it with a laugh most times, I really am considered a genius, and despite my IQ or my desperate desire to work again, I'm a stay at home mom who is doing her best to raise a special needs child. Sometimes I get the feeling that people who find out that I'm a stay at home mom think that I'm stupid or unfeminist for it. Which makes me quite sad. I love to be known for changing the world, but that's kind of vague.

 

If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?

 

I really want to go to Ireland and Asia. Ireland, because it's where half of my family is from. Asia because I love the varying cultures and traditions among the many many countries and regions there. 

 

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?

 

Bali, which always makes my husband laugh, because his family is from Jakarta and he's been to Bali many times. I want to live there because they take such a wonderful approach to parenting, especially babies, and I think it's just beautiful. 

 

How did you become a ST instructor?  Not the process, but how did you decide to do that?  After 2+ years of ST and facing another 2+, I'm thinking about it myself. 

 

I was using Signing Time with my daughter for about a year and a half before they even started talking about the Academy. She was 4 and a half when I started with ST. She didn't talk at all, unless it was random echos from Dora the Explorer. Within a few weeks of watching ST, she was signing "mom" "ball" "more" and "cheese". For me, that was miraculous. By the time they opened the doors of the Academy, she had about 200 signs and nearly 500 spoken words!!

So teaching it to other people was a logical next step to me. :) If you're considering it, do a bit of research to see if there would be enough interest in your area to make it into a business.

post #7 of 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by JynxGirl View Post

What do you want to be remembered for?

I really want to be remembered for being a brilliant woman. Much as I say it with a laugh most times, I really am considered a genius, and despite my IQ or my desperate desire to work again, I'm a stay at home mom who is doing her best to raise a special needs child. Sometimes I get the feeling that people who find out that I'm a stay at home mom think that I'm stupid or unfeminist for it. Which makes me quite sad.

 

 

This is a lot of what I'm dealing with also.  Genius level IQ, SAHM with a SN LO.  I also struggle with ambition.  People who know me well understand what and why I'm doing it, and people who only have a passing acquantance often think I'm either stupid because I'm a SAHM or I'm stupid for being a SAHM - not sure which is more prevalent.  But I even got that from my own sister, back when we were still speaking.  That the simple fact that I wanted children and was planning to SAH with them made me less than, even though intellectually I'm the smart one (she's childless by choice). 

 

 

How did you become a ST instructor?  Not the process, but how did you decide to do that?  After 2+ years of ST and facing another 2+, I'm thinking about it myself. 

 

 

I was using Signing Time with my daughter for about a year and a half before they even started talking about the Academy. She was 4 and a half when I started with ST. She didn't talk at all, unless it was random echos from Dora the Explorer. Within a few weeks of watching ST, she was signing "mom" "ball" "more" and "cheese". For me, that was miraculous. By the time they opened the doors of the Academy, she had about 200 signs and nearly 500 spoken words!!

So teaching it to other people was a logical next step to me. :) If you're considering it, do a bit of research to see if there would be enough interest in your area to make it into a business.


I'm sure I could find interest in this area.  Aside from all the classes in signing that don't use ASL, there is also a deaf school a few towns over, so people on the fringes of that community may also be interested.  It's just the time commitment I'm questioning at this point.  My big sticking point is grammar though, i don't have the ASL grammar because all my practice has been ST, so it's sort of mixed. 

 

I started ST with DS at 4 mos, and he didn't even start trying to sign until after he was 2.  He obviously could understand my signing (and still understands it better than spoken some days), but he didn't even try doing it himself until after his 2nd bday.  He is extremely verbal though, especially for an ASD kid.  But he's echolallic also, so while he doesn't echo Dora (not one we watch much), he does echo Blues Clues and Ni Hao Kai Lan CONSTANTLY.  It's very weird to be woken up at 4 am to him echoing a scene from Kai Lan - over the monitor.  It's one of those "oh gee, guess he's awake" moments.  lol.gif

 

post #8 of 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by cristeen View Post

I started ST with DS at 4 mos, and he didn't even start trying to sign until after he was 2.  He obviously could understand my signing (and still understands it better than spoken some days), but he didn't even try doing it himself until after his 2nd bday.  He is extremely verbal though, especially for an ASD kid.  But he's echolallic also, so while he doesn't echo Dora (not one we watch much), he does echo Blues Clues and Ni Hao Kai Lan CONSTANTLY.  It's very weird to be woken up at 4 am to him echoing a scene from Kai Lan - over the monitor.  It's one of those "oh gee, guess he's awake" moments.  lol.gif

 


Alena's Dora echolalia gets SUPER out of hand sometimes. She speaks spanish to my family doctor and one of my friends from Colombia and they're always shocked by her accuracy. She uses lines from the show to talk about what's going on in her life. We do her scheduling prompts in what we now lovingly call "map format". (Bank, grocery store, Alena's house! Bank, grocery store, Alena's house!) Sometimes I wonder if my IQ is dropping from the never ending repetition. Kai Lan was a hit in our house for about a year, and she knows about 15 words in Mandarin because of it.  Her senior therapist loves pointing out that my functionally non-verbal child speaks four langauges... English, Spanish, Mandarin and ASL...

 

I know what you mean about the "I guess he's awake" moments. We get them a lot too. My favorites are at four in the morning. :P 

 

If you're interested in brushing up on your grammar and syntax and feel like you could feasibly teach yourself, there's a great program at signingonline.com that I used to get my credits for the Academy. It's not super pricy, and it's the only one I've found that teaches all kinds of grammar and syntax. 

 

 

post #9 of 14

Hi Jynx :)

I haven't met another mom who has an ASD daughter. My DD actually has a mix of diagnosis, nothing concrete until she is older but the ASD stuck for now I suppose. Language dysfluencies, and the like...Echola at times. It can be really entertaining and we laugh freely at those times. Other times it is frustrating.

Anyways, nice to meet another mom who was gifted with a special daughter :) Its the hardest job we'll ever love, right?

 

Are you ever nervous or afraid your second child will have ASD also?
I find that sometimes it crosses my mind (along with all the other fears)....but my husband always says it won't change anything. I know it doesn't...but sometimes its there.

 

Whats your favorite food?


If you won a million dollar inheritance - what would you do with it?

 

post #10 of 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by Onemoreontheway View Post

Hi Jynx :)

I haven't met another mom who has an ASD daughter. My DD actually has a mix of diagnosis, nothing concrete until she is older but the ASD stuck for now I suppose. Language dysfluencies, and the like...Echola at times. It can be really entertaining and we laugh freely at those times. Other times it is frustrating.

Anyways, nice to meet another mom who was gifted with a special daughter :) Its the hardest job we'll ever love, right?

 

Are you ever nervous or afraid your second child will have ASD also?
I find that sometimes it crosses my mind (along with all the other fears)....but my husband always says it won't change anything. I know it doesn't...but sometimes its there.

 

Whats your favorite food?


If you won a million dollar inheritance - what would you do with it?

 


Onemoreontheway - It is quite rare to find another mom of an ASD daughter! It sure is the hardest job ever, but I wouldn't give her up for anything.

 

Having a second baby with autism is a scary thought for me, but what I keep telling myself and everyone else is that autism is at least something I can recognize and cope with. If it's autism, I think I'll be okay, but if it's something else... I'll cope eventually. :) It's a hard thing to quantify. I know the strength it takes to be the mom of a special needs child. Until someone has been there, they don't really get how you ever come up with that kind strength or patience or whatever.

For me, I don't understand how a mom can cope with a million whys every single day. Or kids who have to be on top of you every second of every day or they screaming. But you do. :) So that's my take. I'll take what God throws at me, because I'm stronger than that. :) 

 

My favorite food is probably chocolate, which is a terrible favorite food for a diabetic. :P

 

If I won a million dollars, I would make sure my daughter had therapy for a few good years. :) I'd also try to make sure that there was a public use Snozelin room in our area. The only ones around here are private and cost hundreds of dollars to "borrow"

 

post #11 of 14

You're awesome Jen :D

 

Ok what is a Snozelin room? lol

post #12 of 14

LOL A Snoezelen ( I spelled it wrong... oops) room is a sensory room. Basically, a large room filled with different objects that are designed to soothe or stimulate the sensory input processes of a kiddo or adult. They are absolutely fascinating, and the one time I was able to get Alena into one, I nearly blissed out myself on the soothing nature of the sounds and lights. 

 

Check around your state, they may have some that you can use. A lot of states do. Canada, especially Ontario? Not so much...

 

http://snoezeleninfo.com/main.asp ( a great site for info and ideas. I browse it often)

post #13 of 14

Oh wow. Sounds neat, looks neat.

I feel a little dumb with a lot of this stuff. It was just over a year ago I was finally able to convince DH that something was not right and it was not me just 'spoiling' her. The family had pretty much called an intervention because you know how it is - after a while things just become 'normal' no matter what they are.
She's highly verbal, and in fact that was one thing that did not meet ASD criteria. Like, she talks all the time sometimes. LOL

 

I was supposed to start therapy at Easter Seals, but it is over 150 miles away. Living rural there aren't many options. I just do the best I can at home to deal with her and make us all happy...but looking at this therapy room for instance makes me feel like maybe I am screwing my kid up by not being more educated about things?


Maybe you'll listen to a long winded PM and give me some ideas some day? lol

post #14 of 14

PM away. :) 

Don't feel like an idiot. I've known something was up with my kiddo since she was 6 months old. I'm the only one who saw her seizures until she was 3, and a doc and nurse had to help me hold her down on a gurney. Suddenly, I wasn't a crazy person anymore. Moms just know when something is wrong. 

 

As for how much I know... I go into these phases of hyper-research. I read every thing I can get my hands on, and it can last for weeks where I am not sleeping or really eating or doing much else but reading and making notes. I burn myself out on a subject and then go back at it a few months later. Autism was a huge one for me, because no one in my old town was able to diagnose her until she was 3. So I read everything from crackpot theories to out of this world research. 

 

You're not a dummy. You just haven't been reading and researching as long as I have yet.  :) Also, you're not screwing up your kid. I don't have a snoezelen room for Alena. I can't afford it. I waited 6 and a half years for her therapy because I don't have the money to hire a private therapist and our government is a little backwards with autism. 

 

The best thing you can do for her?? Love her, which you do if you're worried about screwing up. :P If you want a really awesome book recommendation on living with someone with autism, check out a book by Susan Senator called "Making Peace with Autism." It's an absolutely fantastic book. :) I hate giving advice on autism, because all of our kids are SO different.

 

But I will tell you this one important thing... Alena never shuts up either... She talks and talks and talks and talks until you honestly think your brain is going to bleed out of your ears. She even used to do it when she wasn't using real words yet. Just non-stop babble. The trick is to keep talking to them. Use words to replace their constant echos. "We're going on a pirate adventure!" "Yep, that's right. We are going to the grocery store." It seems rude to some people, but it is the best suggestion I've ever gotten from one of Alena's speech therapists. :) 

  Return Home
  Back to Forum: May 2012 Birth Club
Mothering › Groups › May 2012 Birth Club › Discussions › <3 Spotlight on.... JynxGirl Feb 12-14 <3