I have 3 young school aged children(2 girls, 1 boy). I have gone through a highly contested divorce with their mother. We agreed to joint custody at the mediation and both have the kids half the time. The children now are with me half the time and with me or me and my family at all times other than school during my possession. In a clean, organized home where they get to eat good meals at home majority of the time morning or evening.
On the other hand my ex is constantly taking them over to a friends and drinking to the point of driving them home drunk or passing out at a friends home. The kids spend more of their mothers time with them over at her friends house rather than at her own home. Constantly surrounded by people drinking on almost every occasion. The children mention this to me quite regularly. Last month she was arrested for a DUI and her friend nearly arrested for public intox. Her drinking seems to be getting worse and worse. After the DUI now she stays overnight with the kids there at her friends even more(even on school nights), and has told my children since the DUI sorry we can't go home I'm too drunk even though the children need to go home and be ready for school the next morning. Even last weekend asking me to keep 2 of the 3 kids because they had been with me for valentine dance and she had been drinking and couldn't come and get them and didn't want to drive home so I could drop them off. By the way she had my youngest with her at that time. My ex's friend also has a 19 year old son that drinks and does drugs and my 3 children are left with him and a friend quite regularly too. Alll of these situations scare me for the children.
My ex is also taking care of them poorly when they are with her. They are hardly ever bathed(maybe once out of a week with her), one of them doesn't have a bed to sleep in, one showed up to my home with the same clothes on from 3 days ago and had not changed over that time nor bathed(not the 1st time this has happened), that same day the other showed up in clothes that didn't really cover her as they were size 6 and she is a 10-12. They are also fed very poorly. Most often they are driven by McD's for breakfast and eat in car on way to mom's work which is where they go to school(and not eating heathy items), and pizza or McD's for dinner on a regular basis. I have been to the home and seen green water in the bath tub, pills laying out on the floor in between the bedrooms(she claimed were fiber pills), feces on the toilet seats that had obviously been there a while, etc...
I believe these things to be disruptive to the children and believe that living in 2 homes is bad enough, but to make them live between mine, hers, and her friends isn't healthy for the children at all.
What do I do? Anything?