GreenMum, am really sorry. I know a bit of what it feels like to know you are pregnant and to lose it again. 7 times is really too much. So sorry dear. I would say try to put your mind at ease, try concentrating on doing the things you enjoy the most and take your mind off it. Once again, so sorry dear. I want you to know we will try our best to be here for you when u need to pour it out. 
Greenmum: Am so sorry dear. I know a little of how it feels like to lose your baby especially after trying hard to get it. So sorry dear. I need you to know that we all have known loss in one way or the other and we absolutely have got your back. Sorry dear
Indie and SKJ please try to relax. Keep hoping and believing - but with a relaxed mind. I believe miracles happen when we least expect them to.
Gtree: Glad you are okay now.
Bebe: how is the litttle one doing today?
MsDolphin: Keep believing hun!
TF: I wish to God that this will be your lucky cycle. But if its not, I still believe you will get a BFP this year.
Shelly: Do keep up the excitement girl! it works wonders.
MindlessChrissy: 
AFM: Still waiting for next month 
Can you tell me more about the blood tests and how they compare to CVS and Amnio? I'm very interested.
I'm trying to remain positive, but I'm just getting beaten down by the process. It's exhausting and I think I need to let myself feel the negative emotions or they are going to haunt me later.
Time for more meditations I guess. I'm just going to stick with the every other day BD plan and let life happen.
ahhh... nothing like hitting the wrong key and deleting a whole post. grrrr
skj - i'm confused, too, about baselines being done before a period. perhaps they consider a cycle starting once hcg goes to zero? also, can you - or anyone else - explain to me why when they do betas they consider you pregnant if your hcg is above a certain number (i think that number is 5?) but anything less than that certain number, you are not? why would there be hcg present w/o pregnancy? i suppose i could google it but i'm feeling lazy :) sorry about potentially having to wait out a cycle... nothing like getting stalled once again! it could be a good thing, i guess, to not be on meds over the holidays. that's what i've convinced myself of, anyway... :)
tf - ugh. has it really been a year? man, i am so ready to graduate to the parenting forums already. i know parenting brings a whole new set of "problems" but i am very ready to trade in ttc problems for parenting probles, you know what i mean? so, even if your cysts aren't gone this cycle... aren't you doing a cycle of bc before starting IVF? wouldn't that continue to rid your body of the cysts and you still be able to start IVF "on time"? i'm probably missing something... i can't believe you are cooking for that many people on thanksgiving!! we have about that number at our house on christmas but it's potluck, thank goodness!
bebe - man, i want to cry tears of joy when i read that everything is going so well with your pregnancy. after all the loss on here recently, it's so nice to see you and gtree going strong. we need that kind of good mojo on this thread! so happy that you love your new ob!
lucielle - hi lady! i'm in the 
mode, too :)
shell, sherry, ms d, gtree,
afm - going to the mandatory ivf info session tonight. meh. i'm just having a really meh week all around. i'm feeling a bit resentful of all the trouble IF has caused... i know i should focus on the positive aspects but i can't help but feel annoyed that we have to pay so much money for *possibly* getting a baby and that it forces me to completely overhaul my career plans so that i have to make every decision around what will make us the most money. it's so the antithesis of my personality. i've never been one to chase dollar signs, just fulfilling work... but now i feel like i have to make money my number one goal and that's just a hard adjustment to make. again, i KNOW there is so much i have to be thankful for and things could be so much worse... but right now i'm just feeling blah. thank you all for entertaining my blah. :)
Lucille, thanks for asking -- baby doing well today. :)
SKJ, yes it was such a relief and I swear wouldn't have happened without you, so thanks a million! Even though I didn't end up going with the one your friend recommended, it made me realize that these kind of OBs are out there and with a little searching I found the new one. It's a relief. Now I am trying to do just that and relax! That's right girl, it's not over until mean AF shows up! Keep the faith. I'm sorry that the m/c made things so wonky. I'm hoping that when you go for baselines (a bit confused by the timing too, but let's believe there's a master plan there) everything looks super-duper perfecto!
Indie, thanks :) You are always so supportive. I'm sorry you're feeling blah. It's to be expected though and I say just allow yourself to feel blah! Hopefully the info session tonight is positive and motivating and you feel less blah after. :) Can't wait to hear the update!!
I've sort of decided to just "trust the process" as my DH would say. I am so tired of all the work I put into TTC. I want to just trust the doc and whatnot, but the system is so impersonal, I feel like I have to me on top of everything to make sure I'm getting the best treatment for me.
At least she had the decency to apologize.
thanks for commiserating with me, ladies. i probably made it sound worse than it is... the next session is in december and it's two days before my appt with the new RE, so it won't delay anything. now, if we had still been planning to do a cycle in december like the original plan... THEN i'd be having a breakdown. the whole situation was just so unbelievable and yet totally par for the course. just... wow. anyway, the upside is we were able to go to a regina spektor concert at HOB instead (we had purchased tickets several months ago but then thought we were going to have to miss it due to the meeting). so that was a nice consolation.
skj - once again, i so get where you are coming from. at some point we just have to give in and trust the process and turn off our brains. it is so very counterintuitive but i don't know how else to make it through all this nonsense. for me, i have decided that i am just going to believe that this new doctor will be wonderful in every way and everything she tells me she wants to do, even if it is different than what i think we should do, it will be the best plan for me. i figure if i work on believing that then maybe, just maybe, it will come true.
you know, christmas miracles and all.
chrissy - yes, at least she had the decency to apologize. and i can't tell how much that meant to me... i really did have to thank her for it. i would be so much more forgiving of everything... even that huge mistake of them failing to tell me that i had diminished ovarian reserve until six months after the fact... had i gotten a sincere apology. but instead i'm paranoid and bitter. how are you? is your cycle back on track?
toothfairy - what's new, lady???
bebe, shell, sherry, everyone... post!!
Indie, That post made me so mad! I was worried you would have to delay. I had to do some e-learnings that were much more convenient.
The hardest part is that they DO drop the ball on so many things, so if we are crossing their T's and dotting there I's, who's gonna make sure this works? For example, I have no idea when I'm to start injections. If it's tonight, where do I get the meds from at this point. Will my insurance cover them, etc. I'm a planner by nature, so this whole fly by the seat of my pants style is not easy for me. If I could really trust that they had their sh*t together, that would make this so much easier.
skj - did they do an ultrasound or just blood work? i would imagine that an ultrasound could give them a good idea of if you are ready for stims or not... they could tell by follicle size where you are at in your cycle... and i guess blood work could give that info as well... if your numbers are elevated (lh, fsh, e2) then they will probably wait for you to have a period and redo them? just guessing. as far as not knowing things like where to get the meds if they want you to start tonight... yeah... that would be making anxious, too.
i think the key (maybe?) is for us to trust the process while at the same time keeping our eyes open. i think there is room for both faith and doubt. and there is room for questioning things and double checking and crossing t's and dotting i's. and then there is a time to say ok, i'm choosing to trust now. let's do this.
They did a follicle scan and didn't mention anything, so who knows what they saw in there. I hate all the unanswered questions!
Hi ya'll .... Just a quick little hi 
before I go to bed... WORK HAS BEEN SO BUSY!!
Indie: UGH I was so upset when i read about your class being rescheduled ... But was happy to read that you got itall resolved :-)
SKJ: maybe ou will get that Christmas time BFP
Gtree and Indie.... I didnt have any manditory IVF class.... only a nurse teaching on my meds ...
Bebe: I had a dream about you!! you posted that you were having a girl!! lol
AFM: sorry so short, like I said work has been crazy busy I am there by 645 am and i don't get home till almost 8 pm ... so I am now taking dexemethosone, proveria, estrace, baby asprin, and pre natal vitamins ... I get heartburn like a ball of fire HORRIBLE so I have been drinking baking soda water everyday :-/ and then I got a call today from my pharmacy telling me how much my other drugs are going to be OMG Its more than they told me.... 6653.21 (just for all the injectables) Do you guy's know how devestated I am going to be if this doesn't happen?? It just has to work!! I am just so scared!! I pray everyday for a little miracle 
I have to go pass out we have 8 surgeries to do tomorrow before noon... UGH I can't wait to sleep in Saturday !!
gtree! i didn't see your post yesterday... e-learnings sounds SO much more, i don't know, 2012. that would be so much better. also, I LOVE your new profile pic!!! i'm guessing that is a cleverly disguised preggo pic of you??? makes me squeal like a goofy little girl!
skj - this all sounds super promising for a natural bfp! increased fertility after a m/c and all 
and you seem to be ovulating at a very good time. i would be tempted to call back and ask what they saw on my ultrasound but that's just me always wanting too much information... i can't believe she told you it meant a short cycle 
that really doesn't help with the whole 'trusting the process' goal. you could have potentially missed an opportunity to make a baby if you didn't know better yourself.
shell - ugh to the unexpected costs. dh and i were just talking about that the other day. we are really wanting to upgrade to a king size bed (since we now have a giant sheep dog who insists on sleeping with us) but i am petrified of spending money until after we get past IVF for that same reason... unexpected costs. this is going to work!! in all of my searching for ways to increase success of IVF, one of the things i loved was a study about making sure you do a lot of laughing after ET. it helps with relaxing, endorphins, etc etc. so i think you and dh should start putting together a marathon of tv shows and movies that make you laugh good and hard! good luck with your crazy busy work schedule! that sounds exhausting!
toothfairy - where are you??? you've been quiet! miss you.
sherry - you've been quiet, too. though i'm guessing that has more to do with helping out with the little one!
bebe - mornin'!
afm - have my dr. appt today to go over thyroid blood work. curious what i'm going to find out. the RE office called me yesterday to move my IVF consult with the new doctor! thankfully it was just moved by a couple of days. praying there are no more delays. have a lovely friday, everyone!
So, just going to enjoy the weekend with DH while DD is asleep. Feeling way less obsessed about everything this month and just rolling with the punches. Glad that our natural try will work out timing-wise and I think the timing should be good for next month too in terms of our travel schedules.
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