View from the cvs parking lot i am sitting in waiting for them to open so i can blow $$$$ on a frer!!! Ugh...while i hypothesize that the calcium oxylate that causes kidney stones is messing up my tests.
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Taking the Scenic Route...to a BFP - Page 96post #1901 of 221912/6/12 at 5:03amThread Starterpost #1902 of 221912/6/12 at 6:35ampost #1903 of 221912/6/12 at 6:37ampost #1904 of 221912/6/12 at 7:02amThread Starterpost #1905 of 221912/6/12 at 7:44am
holy moses it's easy to fall behind!
sherry - love your christmas baby profile pic! he looks so warm and cuddly. i also loved your post... sitting on a mountain... watching snow... being thankful... that just put me in such a nice place reading that. you sound so grounded. i know it's selfish of me, but i can't wait for your renovations to be done so you can spend more time with us! yeah... totally selfish. :) i'm sorry you had another roller coaster hpt experience. grrrr. i hate hpts.
skj - ughhhh. i'm sorry you are still in limbo. jpack really put things in perspective, though... even textbook scenarios aren't a guarantee. i hate this so much for you. this is a lot to go through back to back. i'm glad you have an RE in mind who you feel excited about should this not work. and even if this one doesn't work out, i'm so encouraged that you had better progesterone this time... your body is getting ever closer to carrying your next child. whether it's the one you have inside you now or one that will come in the new year. still holding out hope that this is your stubborn little boy just being a boy... and being stubborn :)
sila - oh, i do hope O is imminent! hooray for ewcm! wouldn't that be wonderful if metformin was your answer? are you going to pursue it?
bebe - TOTALLY predator baby! hahaha. that's cool that you got to live in HK. i've never lived abroad and wish that i had. my dh came out with me on my last trip. i love being completely out of my element and being able to explore... him, not so much. it was a stressful trip. but now he says he wants to go back! go figure. did you go to the giant Buddha? that's my favorite spot. otherwise, it does seem a lot like nyc. right down to their times square.
shell - you stitched up your own thumb? you are hard core! man, it must be a struggle not have sex right now when you are all "primed' for it! i read about a lady who had fraternal twins with ivf even though they only put one egg back... she had sex when she wasn't "supposed" to and the RE had missed an egg during retrieval and... twins.
jpack - that is a really cool way of looking at things... i am t minus 2 months pregnant :) based on my cycles i don't think i will be getting a valentine's day bfp, more like a late feb/early march one... but i'm good with that, too! i'm really glad you found us. you are a perfect fit with our group!
toothfairy - you've got to love men. they are always quick with an "it's all in your head" lol. when one of my cousins was pregnant, she had zero morning sickness but was absolutely exhausted the first trimester. her husband liked to tell her it was all in her head and just an excuse to be lazy... and he's not even a jerk! just... a man. :) i've been in serious denial about all the shots that go along with ivf. like, i've totally blocked that part out of my mind. i'm sure i'll be freaked when the time comes.
afm - i got good news yesterday that i will be getting a significant salary increase. totally eases my mind and makes the fact that i will start overseas trips again in 2013 a whole lot easier to swallow. the traveling part is the exhausting part. it's such a wicked long flight and now it's looking possible that there will be a malaysia trip tacked on as well. that's a long time to be away from home and on airplanes... makes me nervous thinking about doing all that while newly pregnant with very expensive babies. but i know i won't have been the only person to travel like that while newly pregnant... so i will just have to work on finding ways to not worry/stress about it when the time comes. last night i had one bad dream after another. most of it brought on by some family stress going on both sides of our family (christmas always seems to bring on the stress, anyone else experience that?) but one of my dreams was that i woke up to having started my period. it was very worrisome in my dream. ugh. on the bright side, i also had a dream that my brother surprised his wife by learning this very complicated and silly ballet-style dance. it was rather hilarious.post #1906 of 221912/6/12 at 8:03am
Shelly - Ugh, sorry for the confusion. I really do see light positives on the first 2 tests. Wait a few more days and try again? Hang in there. Why if you were blocked again they wouldn't be able to do anything but an HSG? Or you mean you would have to at least do the HSG to discover if you were blocked?
Indie - I'm not sure. I haven't really asked my Dr. about it because I know my blood sugar levels are in the normal range and so I assumed I could never be given metformin. But my friend's were normal and her Dr have it to her and it worked and she started ovulating and got pregnant. I never really thought how we are all having "expensive babies" whether you've done IUIs or IVF or not all the acupuncture, supplements, yoga, ect really get the $'s up there. Congrats on the raise! The AF dream sounds terrible. I dreamed about disneyland and snakes last night...
AFM - Now that I could be ovulating I'm suddenly worried about what if I do ovulate and we do manage to conceive? If I do ovulate should I call my RE and get him to let me do progesterone just in case? I just really really don't want another early loss. I had a hysteroscopy last month so once again my tubes have been cleared out with dye and should be wide wide open so I feel hopeful. However nothing happened in those months after my HSG and we even did IUIs then. Acupuncture today.post #1907 of 221912/6/12 at 9:46amSila - I think I'd call the RE just to see what he says. I have been doing crinone on my off meds cycles b/c I know I have a progesterone issue. It usually depends on the doc and how they feel about the usefulness of progesterone. I'm so hopeful for you!
Indie - Yuck on the dream! I think the fact that you have so much going on right around when you'd be pregnant is a good thing. If you put your life on hold, this process will go on forever. If you just live your life, it will happen for you. I really believe that.
Sherry - Sorry about the BFN on the FRER. Those other two test seem to have lines on them. Are you gonna test again in a few days? I also loved what you wrote. It was so nice to read. Thanks for sharing that with us.
AFM - FML. So, I just heard back from the new RE's office and as of Jan 1, they will no longer be in my insurance network. I have no out of network coverage, so the initial consult alone will be $350. I scheduled it, but I'm sure I'll cancel it. I was so hopeful, but now this is just another sign. I feel like the universe is telling me that it's never going to happen. If I lose this one too, I will official have recurrent pregnancy loss. I don't know if there is really much to do for me in that case. I'm just so heartbroken. I feel like my body is so cruel and worthless. I'm in a dark place. I know I'm supposed to be thinking positive thoughts and all of that, but it's just so hard. And, I'm feeling crampy today.post #1908 of 221912/6/12 at 10:02am
Hi ya'll ... I am going to try and get this all in quick cause I am at work ( as usual) ....
SKJ: keep the faith lady!! Positive positive glass half full!!
Sila: I would start my progesterone 3 days after I ovulated... just to be safe if I was you :-)
Indie: YAYAAYYAA more money!! awesome!! I think your IVF timing is going to be perfect for you!!
Sherry: UGH those Ugly little BFN's :-( I am so sorry ... your DGS is so freaking adorable
BEBE: Awwwwww I love the sono pic!!!!
Quick AFM: So My ER is going to be Sunday now... so 2 more days of injections.... I have 6 follicles 4 on the right 15,14,13.5,12 and 2 on the left 16, 17 .... So they are growing :-) they want them to be at least a 18 by ER day.... Praying that they all get there!!! So now I am in visulizing Tomatoe plants growing in my ovaries LOL .... come on babies GROWWWW .... and Yep I stiched my own thumb lol Luckily I cut my left thumb so I could easily do 2 little stiches ... I was just too tired to drive up to work , so they culd do it! ... and i think i am a good sticher lol
I will be back for better personels later ... UGH WORKpost #1909 of 221912/6/12 at 12:10pmShelly - Yay for big follies! I'm sure they are going to be very plump by Sunday. This is sooooo exciting!
AFM - The warm and fuzzy RE nurse called to interpret the results that my PCP had sent over. She said, "the increase is appropriate." Anyways, after my crappy insurance situation with the new RE, I started to search through my options and found an RE who specializes in recurrent pregnancy loss. I'm going to make an appointment just to see what she has to say. I'm not sure if I fall in that category, though I did read that you "qualify" if you've had 3 back to back miscarriages, so if I end up losing this one, I will be in the RPL group. But, I feel like there is a lot of stuff going on with me, so I'm hoping she will have some general ideas.post #1910 of 221912/6/12 at 12:28pm
jpack, haha, good idea with the slideshow!
Sila, do you have PCOS? I think you may have mentioned that before . . . and yay for good EWCM! I was taking progesterone as a "just in case" from the time I O'd on . . . I'm still taking it in fact! I think of it as a nice insurance policy with no downside.
Aww Sherry, hi! You've had a very busy year, and I can understand how one might just get to a point when they say enough already! I'm sorry for the FRER BFN. Ahhhhh! It's so unbelievably frustrating. I hope some time with DH will do you well - of course it will. It was so nice to see a post from you and I'm thinking of you and sending you a virtual hug!!
Indie, yes we did make it to the Buddha and just about every other thing. It was fun for my short time there. I lived in London for a year, which was great fun. DH and I want to live in Europe, so we are trying to make that happen. My DH is quite adventurous, and I love Europe, so hopefully we can make this happen! Maybe that's the only way I'm going to get out of my contract for awhile and away from this crappy job!! Um, huge yay for your salary increase, girl! AWESOME! What a way to start the new year! That's too funny about the dream of your brother. You just must tell him that!
SKJ, I'm so sorry about the insurance mess! NOT what you needed right now. :( I'm sending you big huge hugs . . . and also lots of positive vibes for this to be one sticky little bean! I'm glad you had a nice nurse and some reassurance. You just hang in there! When is the next beta?
Shell, this is amazing! Sunday is the big day -- can't wait to hear from you on how it goes. No doubt all those follies will be bigger than 18!!!post #1911 of 221912/6/12 at 1:03pmsherry I so loved the early am pic of the CVS! When I first found out I was pregnant with DD, I had a bit of a meltdown (you know a "bit" a.k.a. a complete existential meltdown) I was 25, almost 26, and though we had tried to get pregnant, it was the first try and I was not emotionally ready (but all's well that ends well- very well). Anyway, DH (then DP) and I lived in Albuquerque. My mom and step dad had come to visit (nice timing- they got to see the FRER!) and we had planned a trip up to Taos. So I just remember finding out about the pregnancy, and then that night or the next night we headed up. In our hotel room, I had this meltdown late at night. After DH fell asleep, I was still beside myself and couldn't sleep. At like 4am, I went to a 24h Walmart for more HPTs. (as if maybe the other tests in albuquerque were wrong or something). I just remember feeling like the only person on the planet. I bought something eat (of course..) and HPTs. Even though I felt so alone, the world was just so beautiful at dawn in the mountains. I think when I saw the following BFP, I let go of all that anxiety. There that morning, in the mountains. I know that story isn't helpful AT ALL to your dumb ambiguous hpt results (for which I am so sorry and wish were conclusive, if not positive), it just reminded me of that morning, and I at the very least wish you the peace that I found then. It sounds like you are on your way, and so cool about all your hard work on the mountain home! So cool!
SKJ- so sorry you're feeling crampypost #1912 of 221912/6/12 at 1:25pmWhoops! See that's why I should not use my phone! I was saying...
SKJ- also, sounds good about the RE specializing in repeated loss. I lost two back to back and that was enough for my OB to send me to an RE with a diag of recurrent loss. I think two is enough (one is too many, but you know what I mean), and I think it's fabulous to see someone who is specializing in loss. (though I have everything crossed that you're not gonna need any of it regardless!)
Ok, more later, this phone thing is enticing but not very effective!post #1913 of 221912/6/12 at 1:54pm
Shell! Fabulous! Are you a nurse by the way, or work at a hospital? Sorry I may have missed that...
SKJ - I want so badly for this to be your fighter baby. I am glad you found an RE that specializes in RPL. I agree with jpack one is too many for anyone and 2 back to back is 2 too many. After my 2 babck to back losses I requested the RPL blood work and was surprised that my RE agreed and considered me RPL after "just 2". Prayers that you won't even have to make it to this new RE.
bebe - No I have never been diagnosed with PCOS and the only real symptom I have of PCOS is the lack of ovulation/very very very late and rare ovulation. I agree about progesterone. I guess I better call then as soon as my temp confirms O.
AFM - Definitely good EW going on! I swear I am having O pains but please laugh at me when it ends up being all in my head. I'm scared I'm being way too hopeful if you know what I mean. I finally got a chance to practice yoga this morning after a week of not being able to. Yoga has impacted my life in so many ways. I feel like I can't live without it.post #1914 of 221912/6/12 at 6:21pm
SKJ: well that is GREAT news!! I am glad you are looking into a new RE (but honestly I doubt you will need them) I think you should go lay in bed with just a candle glowing and listen to some meditation and visulize... :-) I am still just beaming that you are PREGNANT!! yaaay
Bebe: My DH lived all over Europe for 3 years (Army Ranger) And we both would love to live in Europe one day too :-) ... My DD (12) wants to live in Paris , I want to live in Germany or Italy :-)
Sila: I am a registered Dental Hygentist and a registered surgical dental assistant .... I can stich a mouth up good lol .... YAY for ewcm , My RE told me that when i feel O pains that is usually will happen within 3 or 4 days :-)
Indie: that is so cool about that Lady.. i would LOVE to BD right now (hahhaa tmi) But I have spent way to much money to screw anything up!! So i am following diresctions... even though it's tough.Sorry you have been having bad dreams :-( Awesome one about your brother though. The shots really are not that bad... i could post a horror picture of my Tummy (but I won't do that to ya'll) it looks worse than it feels ... I am MORE scared of the progesterone shot in my Hiney :-O
Jpack: I think you fit in GREAT :-) haha Yes i really want to BD ... so pathetic i feel like a Nympho hahahahahahahhahahaa
TF: Isn't that crazy?? all this ewcm... I have NEVER had this much!! makes me think I would be able to get PG without ivf... haha ... Sorry for the dry spell... I was told no sex (of any kind) which basically means no orgasm (giggles) for at leat 28 day's ... when i become Pregnant it would be safe to wait the 12 weeks with no intercourse as well.... so It's going to be a Looooonnnnggg time before me and DH can get super cuddly (poor guy) lol .... I mean I guess he can do his thing right? hahah
Sherry: I love the picture , I like to visulize things like where people live, and what they see everyday... so it was nice to see through your eyes and have that feeling of waiting for that FRER results... sorry it turned out crappy :-(
Gtree: how are you feeling today?
afm: I am just super excited ... I am of course nervous ... But I keep putting the negative to the back of my mind. So i went to a website that tells you your due date when you put in egg retrival date for ivf and it said Congratulations you are 1 and 1/2 weeks pregnant... lol I was like COOL ... anyway My babies will be due in August they say for twins the beggining of August and for a singleton the end.... I lost my DD August 22 16 years ago ... wouldn't that just be crazy if I ended up having the babies on her BDay!? ... I found out I was pregnany on Aug 22 with DD # 2 ... maybe this is all a good sign... wow ok I am rambling on.... I am a little nervous ... Dr appointment tomorrow at 10:00 then I am shopping with MIL all day :-)post #1915 of 221912/6/12 at 7:11pmpost #1916 of 221912/6/12 at 7:17pmpost #1917 of 221912/7/12 at 3:56amThread Starterpost #1918 of 221912/7/12 at 4:58amUgh sherry. That sucks! I'm so sorry.
shell - ooh! I like the sounds of August 22nd. How cool would that be. I'm so very sorry about your dd.
I hope you have 8 plump eggies today!
sila - yay for good ewcm! I hope you have a temp shift in the next day or two. Are you still temping? I'm also intrigued by metformin for you.
afm - on my phone so it's hard to look back. I'm thinking of all you ladies. Thanks for all the reassurances. My beta is at 830 this morning. I had a dream it was up to 200. Hoping that's a good sign.post #1919 of 221912/7/12 at 8:13ampost #1920 of 221912/7/12 at 8:14amIndie - Super congrats on your raise! That's so awesome and totally makes the career path switch so worth it! Where are you in your cycle?
TF - Glad the shots haven't been bad so far. Sorry about the itchiness Can't wait to keep hearing more about the journey.
Bebe - I'm still so freakin' excited for you and your likely baby girl!!!
Jpack - did you get your temp shift? Hoping the BDing did the trick.
AFM - Got an appointment with the RPL specialist for next Friday. I was so surpirsed she could see me so soon. Glad to have that on the books, but hoping I won't need it.
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