pickle18 - (As the PP mentioned in your post...) You're absolutely correct, I am making an effort to sympathize with our OP. If, 15 years ago, someone had walked up to me on the street and told me that cutting out family members who were abusive, violent and unhealthy was an option I would have been horrified, and probably backed away slowly. I would not have believed it. I would not have taken any action. If our OP is coming from a similar cultural place then perhaps recognizing that viewpoint and calling it out will help them hear and consider the advice to cut Grandma out.
Linda on the move - I absolutely do not compare cutting out family to members to mass murder. I state that "... [cutting out family members] is seen as the moral equivalent of mass murder...", which is a fair bit different. I think I understand why you're so upset by my post. I'm fully supportive of our OP taking action to protect their child from the Grandma in this scenario, and I say so, in my original post. I'm not sure where else you and I can go with this conversation. I'm comfortable with what I posted. I'm sorry my post was upsetting to you. I don't think it will be productive to continue our personal back and forth, but you're welcome to reach me by personal message.