So this is something I've been thinking about for a while and the stranger danger thread reminded me.
We have been teaching our 21mo to hold up her hand and say "No! Stop!" if she doesn't want to be touched. No drilling or anything but, if we're playing and tickling her or something or go to kiss her and she says "no" then I say "that's right, if you don't want someone to touch you you say No! Stop!" and I hold up my hand.
The trouble is, there are some occasions that, as her parents we do need to touch her when she doesn't want us to. The main example is in the bath - she rubs soap all through her hair then doesn't want us to rinse it out. She can't go to bed with a head full of shampoo but it breaks my heart when she's in tears and saying "No! Stop!" when we try to rinse her hair. Of course we try to get her consent and do it gently and offer many different options for rinsing but she hates it all.
So, what do you do when you have a legitimate need to touch your child but it causes you to override the very lessons you're teaching her for her own protection?