The hubs and I are struggling to agree on a girl's name. He loves Kaya- I think it's very pretty & like the meaning but feel it's way too trendy right now. He doesn't care if it's trendy and says it's an ancient name and likes that it means "island" in Taino (part of his native heritage).
I'm Italian-American and always wanted to name my child an Italian name since that tradition is being lost in my family ...since my husband is Hispanic I thought we might find some common ground with the overlap of Italian/Spanish sounding names, but he says he identifies more with his African/Taino roots.
I really like Angelina...but I'm open to many other names however he just shoots everything down. He agrees Angelina is a beautiful name but thinks it's too common & too soft. He likes "cool" names & I like "classic & feminine".
I keep reminding him that the baby is going to have his last name which is Hispanic but he says he doesn't identify with his last name and it doesn't mean much to him. I find this VERY upsetting because I would have much preferred to keep my own Italian last name or at least hyphenate when we got married but he was very insistent that I change my name to his and because it was so important to him I ended up moving my last name to a second middle name and taking his last name to please him. If I had known back then that he cared so little for his last name I wouldn't have bothered because I actually like the name I grew up with!
I'm just wondering where the room is for my heritage to be represented in our child's name. I feel like part of my identity is getting lost all of a sudden. I am so worried we aren't going to settle on anything. We are both pretty headstrong and stubborn. To make matters worse we made the mistake of telling our parents about our name choices & his mom likes Kaya, and of course my parents like Angelina. It's stupid but I feel like if I agree to go with Kaya my mom will think I'm weak for not standing up for myself.
I'm ready to throw out both these names and start from scratch to find something completely new. I'm just so unexcited about the process now because it's been so difficult and not fun at all. I'm already feeling like a bad momma to the babe stressing over what should be a joyful decision...just wishing this could be a fun and easygoing process...
Sorry for the long post...would love some advice!