~~Infertility ONE Thread March 2012~~ - Page 2

[Sourire]

Ok I think I've managed to do all the blurb updates that have been requested so far, let me know if I missed anyone!

Thanks everyone for the excellent advice on the skiing & hot tub issue. Monkey your advice was especially helpful! I can now go skiing with no worries, and I do plan to skip the hot tub.

chica - that sure does look like a textbook implantation dip you had on 7DPO there. Coincidentally, I'm 7DPO today and I had a big dip this morning. It looks like I'm copying you! I hope you get a BFP on Tuesday! I'd also like to copy you for that too!

shesaidboom - The way the body works without meds is that once 1 follicle takes the lead, the others realise they have no chance and they basically disintegrate. It sounds like that's what's happening in your case. Of course the meds are supposed to override that, but I suppose if you are on a really low dose your body is more likely to stick with the natural process.

If you end up having a rainy wedding day just remember that rain on your wedding day is a sign that you'll have a fertile marriage! Maybe my sunny wedding day is the reason why I'm having problems TTC haha.

gemmine - That sucks about your 2nd beta. This must be so scary for you. Was your 2nd beta at least a bit higher than the first? I've seen other ladies on this thread have betas that took more than 48 hours to double and have everything end up ok. I'm really hoping for some good news for you on Monday!

cbaa - have fun at the hockey game! As a Montrealer I am supposed to hate the Bruins (in particular Zdeno Chara) but honestly I don't really care about hockey all that much so I hope the Bruins win when you go! Let us know how your monitoring goes today!

Smiles - wow it just hit me that I'm halfway through the 2ww thanks to what you posted! Boy does time ever slow down! Thanks for the message for my uterus, I'll pass it on :) I guess you're in the 2ww too now right?

I can definitely tell you more about bowel pain and endometriosis. When I have AF sometimes I have intense stabbing pain in my bowels when I have a bowel movement (also right before). Not fun. Also it only happens when AF is heavy therefore it is likely linked to hormones, which is why I suspect endo.

I hate all those sad TTC anniversaries. I have so many of them... August which is when we started TTC, March is when we had our first appointment with the RE (just realised it's been a year since I had that first visit! gah!) and of course New Year's Day is just a crappy reminder that another year has passed and we're still not pregnant. Bleh. My therapist HIGHLY discourages leaving your feelings in a deep dark place, she says its much healthier to release them otherwise they just fester and fester and cause way more stress. I have a tendency to do that too... tell myself everything is fine and its stupid to be upset... but since meeting my therapist I try to just have a good cry whenever the urge strikes. For example a few weeks ago at work I started feeling like crying for no reason, so I went for a walk and cried my heart out and felt sooooo much better after. 

sila - I went back and checked my charts from when I was on Clomid, and I was ovulating around CD18-20. I think that's pretty normal for Clomid from what I've heard... people ovulate later on Clomid than they would on Femara or injectables. I usually ovulate around CD17 without meds, and Clomid actually pushed my ovulation back! I think that with a 13mm follicle on CD15 you have an excellent chance of ovulating between CD18-20, since follicles usually grow 1-2mm per day. I also think its very odd that the RE expects your follies to be 24-27mm around ovulation. Most of us doing IUIs get triggered when our follicle is at least 17-18mm, meaning it would be 19-24mm at ovulation 2 days later.

wissa - wow you took baby aspirin too for the first time when you got your BFP? I wish I had decided to try it sooner!!!! Of course I had heard of it but I tried so many different things in my first year of TTC and none of them worked so I kind of gave up trying stuff. I'm on day 2 of baby aspirin today. Hoping it helps!

[Smilesarefree]

Sourire - Thanks for the reply about the bowel pain.  It peaked my interest as I sometimes get a very sharp intense pain in my bowels and as soon as I feel it I know that I'll need to go in the next minute or so.  It doesn't happen all the time or really all that often.  It only lasts probably 10-20 secs and I find that if I am sitting down I can relieve the pain a bit by lifting my bum off the chair.  I never thought to notice when throughout my cycle it happens, I'll have to pay better attention.  And yes I guess I am in the 2ww but have no idea where at!   Enjoy skiing, and maybe I'll try and cry it out sometime over the weekend I'm sure it would make me feel better!

[Sourire]

Smiles - that sounds exactly like the pain I get. It took me a long time to notice that it only happened during AF (I'm talking years). It's only when I started looking into endo that I suspected it might be connected with AF, and then I paid attention to when I got it for a few months and confirmed that I only got it during AF.

[gozal]

Guys! I'm here! Please don't think I disappeared on you! I've been away from my computer because - and please know that I am so not complaining - I have been super nauseous/tired this week. I've been trying to read along when I can from my perma-perch on the couch, fist pumping, indignancy, and teary eyes all the way. I have so much I want to write to each of you. I'm going to do my best, okay? Because I love you guys. You know that, right?!

Just a quick AFM, my u/s on Mon. included the words "two perfect heartbeats"! Yes, of course I started crying. I think I'm going to be brave and say I'm ready to be moved to graduates. I'm going to go ahead and start posting updates on the graduates thread also. 

Sourire, hope you are having a great time skiing! Absolutely, I would go. But no hot tub. Which would probably make me not want to go skiing. ;) But I am a major wimp about the cold. Um, seriously, the nurse had never heard of OHSS? That is insane. Good thing you are feeling better. I hope those stimulated ovaries gave you some super eggs!

Gemmine, I'm so sorry you're in this horrible waiting game. From my own personal vortex of googling hcg numbers and doubling times, I really believe it could be okay, esecially with your strong 17dpo level, but I know that it can hurt to think that way, too. So just know that I am madly thinking good thoughts in your direction. 

cbaa, I know it probably doesn't seem like it to you, but your positivity just knocks my socks off! I am full of admiration. You make everything sound like fun, including paleo muffins! I am so glad to hear the shots are treating you well. I know that defeated what-for feeling that comes with those horrific doctor bills. Especially when you don't know definitively what is wrong. Sometimes I wonder, had I been more patient would my babies have just come to me? But there is no way to know that, and so easy to say with two babies growing inside me. I do not regret any of it. I thank G-d we have the medical stuff we have today. Have fun at hockey! Know that you are in my prayers!

Chica - implantation dip, crazy emotions - very promising!!

shesaidboom, how maddening! I bet with all the annoying staff at your doctor's office you can't even get a straight answer as to why you might be responding the way you are? 

hope4light, I hope your HSG is as uneventful and un-painful as mine was!

Sila, it's always like that, isn't it? One day you can see the light, the next day all stormy skies. It sounds like you are definitely responding to the Clomid, which is a good thing! My RE never told me that about Clomid in terms of optimal follicle size, she just wanted them over 18mm for trigger. But we also knew from all my natural monitored cycles that I tend to make big follicles anyway. My trick was to get Clomid to get me to NOT ovulate early. It's still bizarre to me because I'd never been an early ovulator until after my m/c. Bodies are weird, man! Anyway from that experience I do gather that there is some interaction between Clomid and the natural tendency of your cycles. Which is to say, it sounds to me like this cycle is building up to be a promising one for you. By the way, I did want to mention, I have a dear friend who like you is very fit and has always been very thin naturally. Professionally she works as a personal trainer and fitness instructor. She had soem ovulation problems both times ttc - she was one of the rare ones who has low enough body fat (without being an Olympic athelete) in the West to interfere with fertility. I'm sure you are well aware of that possibility and are of course super well-informed on diet and all that stuff. But I wonder if some experimentation with dietary fat would help? For my friend, she had to cut back on her work, eat a bulk-up diet, and she was also folic acid resistant. She didn't take the special form of folate, she just stopped taking OTC prenatals with folic acid in them. And she has two gorgeous boys!

Marmo - I missed all the fun of cheering you along but I am so happy I get to say CONGRATULATIONS!! Interesting that your first hint was a very slightly darker line 10dp-trigger. That was mine too, but I convinced myself it was all in my head. How awesome that it was in neither of our heads?!

Smiles, you may remember, but the first time I was really able to feel all of it and not pack anything away was the weekend before I got my bfp. My mom always tells me that it's precisely at that point when you can't take another moment that things finally change. So here is hoping the same thing happens for you!

teresa, ugh about work. I had the same issue with not knowing what the plan was until my baseline u/s. On the one hand, it drove me crazy. On the other, it made me feel like my RE was sure every cycle would work and no plan was needed, which made me feel good. It's a wash I guess! Fingers crossed that this is an amazing cycle for you.

I know I've left out things I wanted to say - but I am thinking of each and every one of you. I am going to be peeking in and cheering you on! Can't get rid of me so easily! ;)

[SilaMarila]

Sourire, Gozal - Thanks again for the encouragement about my follies! We aren't for sure IUI this cycle so maybe that is why he only told me how big they needed to be to ovulate? We'll se where they are monday.

Gozal - Thanks for the input.It makes sense that since I ovulate extremely late on my own, that I will probably still ovulate later with Clomid. I also used to be a personal trainer and fitness manager. I "retired" to be a stay at home mom and just train myself now. Anyways, I haven't even tested my body fat percentage in ages. I was at my lowest when we conceived DS. I'm not at all under weight, rather I'm pretty muscular. I've done a lot of experimenting with my diet and exercise for ttc and nothing seems to change. I can't figure it out. I've cut way back on high intensity stuff and running. I even completely stopped running for 2 months in the summer and no change. I'm eating A LOT of fat right now. Good fats of course. I keep telling myself fat doesn't make you fat, calories make you fat. I've somehow gained 2-3lbs in the last month or so though. Maybe it will help. I do take a high quality food based prenatal and I also eat a lot of greens, so I'm not about hte folic acid thing.

Smiles - I'm sorry you have been at this so long. Hugs.

AFM - We had a miracle chemical pregnancy (around 5wk loss) in June. Today would have been my due date. I'm so sad that it's been 9 plus and nothing has changed. My womb is still empty. I'm even more sad that we're approaching a yr and half and my arms are still empty. No baby to hold.

[Sourire]

Gozal - Glad to hear from you! I missed you! I'm so happy your pregnancy is healthy. I actually got a tears in my eyes when I moved you to graduates, it's just so darn exciting! I'll definitely be stalking you on the grads thread.

Sila - This may sound strange to say, but I'm jealous of you gaining a few lbs! I am underweight (BMI 18.0) and no matter how hard I try, nothing I do seems to change that. In fact I randomly weighed myself earlier this week and I had lost 2lbs which is so discouraging (though it could have been due to my recent haircut haha... I have very thick, heavy hair)! I'm sure a lot of people wish they had my problem, but I was reading in Making Babies the other day that being underweight is twice as detrimental to fertility as being overweight.  The book also mentioned that thin women who excercise even moderately can benefit from cutting back a bit, but the only excercise I do is very gentle yoga 3x per week so I doubt that cutting back would be beneficial to me. I've also read that the vegan & vegetarian diets can increase the likelihood of having issues with ovulation, especially for thin people. I'm so torn because I'm trying to eat healthier for fertility but a lot of the fertility/endometriosis diets involve reducing meat & dairy which kind of worries me because that's where I get most of my fat! I guess I'll just have to focus on organic meat, because the main reason given for cutting out meat is usually hormone & antibiotic content. The only problem is that DH hates buying organic due to the price and we always argue about it (we can afford it, DH is just cheap).

So sorry to hear about that due date today... what a sad day.

[SilaMarila]

Sourire - I'll gladly give you that couple of pounds! In my opinion non organic dairy and meat are just not worth it. The risks of the hormones and antibiotics in non organic meat and dairy far outweigh the benefits. My suggestion is saving up your $ to buy high quality meat and dairy and cut the amount you eat back to just a few times a week and eat a vegetarian/vegan diet the rest of the time (have we talked about this before? Or maybe that was someone else? sorry if I'm repeating myself!) Some ideas for healthy plant based fats and things that I do: use high quality olive oil on salads and to cook vegetables with and use it in place of butter ( you can even whip it in the blender and refridgerate it like butter!), or use coconut oil, I also eat a lot of young thai coconuts, a lot of avocados, and lot of good quality raw olives, also nuts and seeds (soaked first). I agree, that I don't think cutting back on your exercise would do anything. There is a fine line where some exercise boosts fertility, but too much decreases fertility ugh. Thanks, I've had a few tears since last night, but I'll be ok.

Monkey - I meant to say about the hot tub thing. This is why my RE wasn't happy to hear that I do yoga in a heated environment huh? She told me kind of what you said. There are pregnant woman that do it at my studio and they were doing it before they became pregnant too. But they probably weren't dealing with IF. It's hard because I feel like it REALLY REALLY helps with the stress and anxiety that are often a result of IF, but at the same time I don't want to do anything that will decrease my chances. But I'm so stubborn and I see these pregnant ladies doing it and I just haven't been able to quit yet...

[shesaidboom]

smilesarefree - monitoring every day definitely is a pain in the ass, but thankfully it was every second day for a while and now I'm surging so no more except for the IUIs.
I'm sorry you're coming up on 2 years TTC. Our TTC "anniversary" is coming up as well. It's such a hard thing to have to go through. Get those feelings out if you can. Keeping them in that dark place is never a good thing, even though a lot of us tend to do that. Sending lots of hugs.

sourire - that actually makes a lot of sense. You're so knowledgeable and I appreciate you sharing answers when you can!
Okay, now I'm hoping for rain! I've heard rain being good luck, but not about the fertile thing.

gozal - I'm sorry you're feeling so icky, but it is nice to hear from you. Happy official graduation move!
I'm thinking what Sourire explained is probably what happened..in a natural cycle most extra follicles will realize they're not going to win so they shrink up. Meds are supposed to overried that, but because I'm on such a crazy low dose it probably didn't happen. That makes sense to me anyway. I wonder what my RE would say. I'm trying to make another appointment to discuss next steps if this cycle doesn't work.

SilaMarila - I'm so sorry. I'm thinking of you.

AFM, well I'm surging today so we're going in for IUIs tomorrow and Sunday. My lh is higher than it has been on surging days before though, so I'm worried that my cervix will be high again and it'll hurt like last time. Here were my results for today (CD 10)...

estrogen 417 (down from 450 yesterday)

lh 38

progesterone 6

My one lead follicle is 2cm

Talking about TTC anniversaries..that's always something that makes me sad. In December, it had been 10 years since my first miscarriage. I would have had an almost 10 year old now! I was thinking about how different life would be. I think what everyone is saying is true. It is incredibly hard to go through all this time (and have these reminders of how long it has been) and still have empty arms. I'm hoping that this month, we can get some more BFPs to work towards changing that. Sending good thoughts for you all.

[teresaresa]

Sourire: Would you mind changing my blurb (sorry it’s long) to read – (32) DH (46) TTC#1 since 04/09…. Married 06/09. 2.5 years of trying naturally with acupuncture, herbs, yoga, etc. "Unexplained infertility" 1 failed Clomid cycle w/IUI and 2 failed Femara cycles w/IUI. Starting 4^th medicated cycle with Femara and IUI, Restoring Fertility DVD, new acupuncturist, a shamanic healing, and daily affirmations J

So, the winter storm they were predicting turned out to be some slushy, icy rain – boring. Sounds like cbaa got the actual storm. Started the DVD yesterday, and I like it so far. I haven’t done yoga in a while (and I’m not at my ideal weight), so some of the poses are difficult though I have blocks so that helps. I definitely saw a difference in my flexibility just from yesterday to today.

I read your story from the old thread about your son. I feel so positive and hopeful for you. It’s such a beautiful story. One suggestion – perhaps you could try standing in front of the mirror each morning and speaking aloud your readiness to receive your son. I know it sounds a little hokey, but I think even if your child spirit isn’t currently communicating with you, he’s still there and he can feel your intentions. Am I being totally weird?

Also, I am so with you on unshaved legs. I haven’t shaved mine since late August, and I only did it then because I was in a friend’s wedding in September. On the flip side, I could never DTD with socks on! I actually have a no socks during lovemaking rule J I will refuse get down with DH if he’s wearing socks!

And, I got married on the only day it didn’t rain in June 2009 – it all makes sense now ;-)

chicajones: I’m bummed that they don’t do dual citizenship anymore. That would have been fun! Glad your dental appointment went well and you didn’t have to deal with x-rays! I was never much good at following charts, but all of our “chart stalkers” on here sound super positive about yours. I’m keeping my fingers crossed for you – we need to kick March off with a nice BFP. Sending you a little of my luck o’ the Irish for Tuesday!

shesaidboom: I know how much it must suck right now, but don’t give up hope! You still have time for your follies to kick into high gear like they have before. I totally think it stinks that they put you on such a low dosage of the injectibles – I mean, what’s the point of spending all that money? I would have an emotionally charged sit-down with your RE! I’m sending you hugs and a love note to your follies to get going!

Gemmine: I am so, so sorry. I will keep you in my thoughts this weekend – I know it will be a tough one. If you can, try to do something nice for yourself. I know we’ll all be keeping the hope alive for you. I wish I could hug you for real right now.

SilaMarila: I know my follicle growth was slower on Clomid than it was on Femara, so 11 and 13 don’t sound bad to me for CD15 - especially since you’re also in the process of regulating your cycle at the same time. When do you go in for your next monitoring? Maybe you’ll get a nice birthday present next week and you’ll have gigundo follies ready to pop J That is my birthday wish for you!!!

Just read your latest post. I’m sorry, love.

wissa19: How was the ultrasound?? Jealous of your steadily rising temperatures (weather, not body!) – it’s actually supposed to be sunny and 60 next Thursday which is totally ridiculous, but I’m looking forward to it, nonetheless!

cbaa2010: You are so strong – I have a hard time resisting sugar these days even though I know it’s the root of most evil!! What is paleo? A hockey game will definitely get those endorphins up and make for some good BDing! Enjoy J

smilesarefree: Whoa! Real sexy time? Not have to make a baby sexy time? That is such a recipe for a BFP, my friend. You are in like Flynn this month (do they even have that expression in Canada? Frankly, I’m not really even sure what it means – hope it’s not something dirty!). I am going to keep every digit crossed for you. I definitely vote for a cathartic bawl fest in the meantime. And, I’m right there with you… well, except that I’m coming up on three years. It hit me like a ton of bricks at my new acupuncturist’s office when she asked how long we’d been trying and I said 2.5 years. I caught myself, and was like oh wow – I’ll be starting year 3 in April. BLEEP! I just keep trying to tell myself that I’m going to be a super awesome mom because the IF journey has made me learn a lot about myself and my relationship with DH. Everyone’s journey is different, but I’m sure you’ve learned a lot over the last 2 years too.

gozal: YAYAYAYAYAY!!! So happy to hear from you and your womb with 2 PERFECT heartbeats J

AFM: I had to split up my RE appointment today because I didn’t have a 2hr block of time to dedicate. So, I went in the AM for my b/w, u/s and pelvic and then came back to talk with my doctor this afternoon. I’m really excited about this cycle even though the change he made was only minor. So, I’m doing Femara again at 5mg on CD3-7. This time, though, he’s bringing me in for monitoring on CD15 (4 days later) and plans to do the IUI on CD16 and 17. He’s trying to mimic my body’s natural ovulation time which makes me happy because I’ve been worried about/annoyed by these long LPs. I guess this means my follicle will be bigger though, so I’m not sure if that’s good or not. I believe it was 17 or 19 on CD11 last time. I trust my doc though, so it’s OK by me. He also answered some questions for me that I’ve picked up from you all… he said that AMH is sort of a fad right now for predicting egg quality. He said he only uses it when FSH and Estradiol levels aren’t telling him what he needs to know. He said my eggs are fine so that’s not a concern for him. I asked about endometriosis because I too have pretty painful periods and a lot of pain around my bowels during AF (this month has been particularly bad – I slept with a heating pad all night last night!). He said the crazy thing about endo is that it doesn’t behave in the same way for every person. So, not everyone with endo experiences IF. Also, he said a lot of times women with IF and endo have so much endo that it can be seen on an u/s (there’s nothing on mine). But, he said that’s not always the case. He’s not ready to make me go for a lap yet, but he said he’d put it in his notes to keep in mind for the future. I also asked about baby aspirin and he agrees that it can help, but said it wasn’t right for me at this time. He said he likes to wait until CD3 to tell me the plan for the next cycle because he has the most information at that time. He seemed to indicate that this might be my last Femara cycle, so I asked if that means injectibles are up next. He said he wasn’t sure – he’d have to wait to see how things go with this cycle. All in all, I’m feeling really hopeful and so is he which is nice! In other news, DH backed out of the healing session on Sunday because of the two-week follow up (which includes no caffeine and no alcohol – he has a boys weekend away next weekend, so that wasn’t going to work for him). So, I’ll be on my own which is fine. I think I expressed my disappointment in a really healthy way which is progress (usually there’s some pouting involved!!!). Ok, I’ve written a book on myself. How rude!!! Hoping everyone has a wonderful, hope-filled weekend!

[toothfairy2be]

smiles- I think for me the bowel pain is more upset stomach during AF, I get like pressure/pain like I have to poop all day CD1. Like cramps, all the way from my bowels to my hips and down my legs... I hope that your egg made its little way out and you are on your way to a surprise BFP by having the pressure off! Sometimes it just feels good to really feel and acknowledge your emotions. I think IF makes us so reserved and accountable for our own misgivings that we forget that our emotions are valid and we deserve to give ourselves a good cry sometimes. DH asked if I was about to have an 'ugly cry' when I told him about my lab results... I didn't, but I'm thinking an ugly cry might be just what the doctor ordered...

chica- sounds like good signs!! I love the parenthood, if you are a few episodes behind, be prepared to cry!

sourire- it was sunny on my wedding day too... darnit! We actually went to a Boston University/Northeastern University game, DH is in grad school at BU, they won YAY!! I also <3 the Bruins, I am an all around Boston sports fan... I don't watch and follow along religiously, but I love cheering us on! Sounds like you are having good signs too, please November baby, come join sourire's world! I had to LOL about DH and organic meats- my DH is constantly complaining about or grocery bill doubling since TTC- just because he is a saver (cheap-o) and I'm a spender! We balance each other out. My BMI is 18.7, I lost 7 lbs getting off gluten/dairy after 4 weeks... I just don't know what to eat to gain it back...

Thanks gozal! I can imagine the most relieving words to hear are 'two perfect heartbeats' - Are you going to find out the sexes? I think we will always wonder 'what-if' after going through IF, but what matters is reality. We will all get there, I have faith in each and every one of us. God's time... thats what I keep believing.

Sila-  what a hard day. I hope that the clomid does a turn around and your have a full belly soon and full arms at this time next year.  Your health and commitment to your diet amaze me... I'm struggling just to reduce my sugar/oils intake... Somehow sugar is harder than gluten or dairy... I did trigger with Clomid, but I used to O at Cd 17 then it moved to CD 15, I believe with Clomid it was 15, 14, 15- so pretty much the same. But I agree with Gozal, if you weren't Oing at all before it makes sense it would still take your body a little longer to figure out what to do. What dose were you on again? Any EWCM yet?

shesaidboom- well it sounds like at least that one follicle bumped up to a good size for your surge. Looking back on dates and what-ifs are always hard, to think of how our lives would be different. I hope this cycle brings the change your body needed and you have a take home baby in your arms soon.

AFM- Results are in- I am following suit to everyone else having sub-bar response this cycle. 1 lead follicle on the left at 16.7mm, all others under 12mm... I go back tomorrow for new b/w u/s and my nurse says likely trigger tomorrow, IUI Monday. I might ask if we can do IUI Sunday... I don't know what they would say as that is not routine... but Monday is so hard for me to get out of work. My office manager is out so I would have to go directly to my boss, who I thought knew I'd been leaving once a month since Sept but my OM told me last month she has never told him, he just never notices I'm gone... We will see. No LH surge for me yet. I'm annoyed that I'm ready for O at CD8... what is with that?! My estrogen was 373, they didn't post my LH or Progesterone, who knows why. To add my 'anniversary' - I just logged on to fertilityfriend to get my O dates on clomid for sila, and it says my VIP membership expired--- today--- what are the chances, I have barely been on in a few months, but seriously... today?! It just makes me sad, when I signed up I remember thinking I'm wasting money with  my year and a half subscription or whatever it was... so much hope back then. Still hopeful, just in a different way now.

[toothfairy2be]

teresa- I was apparently writing my post for long enough that I 'cross-posted' with you! I remember that June in 2009, it was our first year in our house and we have pictures of how flooded the yard was! Our Murphy dog was just a puppy and the water was nearly up to his belly! I don't know how you guys don't shave DH would not come near me.... not a chance. The storm here was more like snow for a few hours, rain for most of the day, then more snow in afternoon. The accumulation is more just on the grass, our driveway is nearly clear. I hope you enjoy the DVDs, I haven't done any this cycle- so I may resist foods but I can't commit to yoga! I did have a cookie and some potato chips today . Sooo paleo is a diet, it basically says you can eat anything with a face (meats) a mother (eggs) or grows in the earth (fruits/veggies), also you can have nuts. No flours, no legumes (not sure why, I still eat them), no sugar, oil, dairy. I don't really follow paleo, but I know all their recipes are safe for me and I was craving sweets. Sorry DH backed out of your healing, but it will be good for you anyway. I like your RE. As a planner/worrier, I wouldn't deal well with that at all, but he does sound very thoughtful and well spoken. Very good qualities.

[mexilady]

Thanks for the warm welcome! Sorry I have been out of the loop, busy few days here!

Sourire- Interesting information about the endo. I don't really have any pelvic pain or heavy bleeding, but I know that one can have it and not have any symptoms at all.  I am very open to having the lap surgery if we don't get any answers in the next few months. Keeping my fingers crossed for IUI #2 I would gladly give you a few extra pounds if that was possible:), got at least 20 extra I can spare:) I was actually wondering if the RE was going to mention something to me about being 20lbs overweight, but did not bring it up.

GEM- So sorry to hear that the beta did not double, I can't even imagine how far away Monday must feel. Please keep us updated.

Cbaa- Is this your first cycle on injectibles? Hopefully you can get the IUI done on Sunday and not have to miss work. I have been wondering how everyone fits visits into their daily lives. My RE office has limited hours, but Dr. said he may come in on the weekend to to IUI if that is when it needs to get done. Really interested in the endo stuff, let me know how your lap goes, I may be following suit in a few months. This unexplained thing really sucks huh? It would be better to find a reason.... at least that is how I feel about it right now.

Teresa- Glad you are feeling hopeful. It seems like that is one area that has fluctuated so much for me. CD1 I always feel totally devastated, usually right after af, a little light comes through, and I get excited to try something new. Sometimes you gotta take the hope when it comes, get it while the getting is good!

Smiles, Sila and Shesaidbooom, anniversaries are so freaking hard. It find myself dreading milestones, new years, birthdays, holidays. It is really hard to not look into the future and imagine how much longer we have to wait. A part of it for me is a challenge to bend my thinking, be flexible to change, and not be so dang hard on myself. You guys are really strong women with lots of love to give, can't wait to hear some really good news on this thread!

AFM- First RE appointment went pretty well. Dr. confirmed what I had been thinking, DH is off the hook, sample is great. Dr. is concerned about my short cycle, spotting and short LP. He wants to take the next few months to do some diagnostics.  I was too late in my cycle to start Femara, which is what he recommends to get me to ovulate sooner and stronger and wants me to supplement with HCG in the luteal phase. I have only heard of HCG to trigger ovulation, and not as LP support, but heck I will try anything new at this point. Next cycle will be HSG, femara and HCG for LP. He wants me to try something for 3months before we go further. He did not even discuss IUI or IVF with us. He also told us that at this point if we did not do any interventions, meds, ect. our chance of conception every month is only 2%. Yikes. It feels good to have a plan, and to move forward. Now I can look forward to awesome side affects and even more nerve wracking 2ww. I really am a positive person, this is just a lot of new info to take in. You all have been so welcoming, I hope I have not forgotten anyone!

[shesaidboom]

teresaresa - thank you! I spoke to my RE about it today at our IUI and it seems she's just being overly cautious, which I understand, but do not think is fair at all. This is a lot of money and a lot of emotion we're messing with. I know you understand that though.
I'm glad you're excited about this cycle. I'm praying this is the one for you. It's great that you have that trust with your RE. I've definitely lost mine in my RE. It's also definitely not rude to write an update on yourself that's more than a few lines! I love reading about your life and progress. It's helpful to see what others are doing to make a difference.

cbaa - Thank you, I really hope so too.
I had a very early O too. CD10. Isn't that weird that we both O'd so early? Maybe it's the injectibles. Last cycle I didn't O until CD17. I'm sorry about having the membership expire to add another hurt to this journey. I'm hoping that this month will be it for you. I really do. Good thoughts for the IUI!

mexilady - I'm right with you with looking into the future. A hard milestone is coming up for me in 3 months. When we started fertility treatments back in September, our RE was so positive and somehow I got this idea into my head that I'd be pregnant by my wedding day. Well it's just over 3 months away and while there's still time, I'm not feeling as positive about it. I'm just worried that if I'm not pregnant that will overshadow much of the joy.
I'm glad your first RE appointment went well! It really is a lot of info to take in though. I'm glad you have a plan, and hopefully you won't need to go any further than this cycle. Thankfully Femara tends to not have very many side effects, so hopefully you won't have to deal with too many.

AFM, we had our IUI today. I swiped our numbers off the charts..

estrogen 238.4 (down from 417)

lh 17 (down from 38

progesterone 6.4

my lead follicle (which was at 2cm yesterday) had burst already and shrunk down completely

Dp's counts after the sperm wash were 71 million with 98% motility (pretty much the same as every other IUI we've done)

Since I had ovulated so quickly my RE decided it was probably pointless to do the second IUI tomorrow, so she said we should just stay home and have sex in the morning. Works for me! I had been having horrible cramping since yesterday morning (ovulation pain, I imagine) so the IUI was quite painful, but not nearly as bad as last cycle. I'm starting the progesterone supps on Monday morning and we are now in the 2ww!

The mama from the clinic who got told off yesterday was at the downtown clinic today, without her son. Thank goodness! I was annoyed during monitoring anyway though because we waited for over an hour and a half, the entire room had filtered out, and they still hadn't called my name for ultrasound. Dp finally convinced me to go ask them and it turns out they had crossed my name off and had already taken the 10 or so people after me. They knew it too because when I came up to the desk, before I even said anything, they said "oh, are you Nicole? Yeah, we crossed you off by accident". Um, could they not have called me when they realized that? I also got a little sad because of something the lady who works the front desk said. She's awesome and I really like her. She jokes around with us in a fun way and makes the experience much better. When I show up on an IUI day she'll lean over and look around, and in a funny voice (like in movies) say "you got the stuff?", referring to the sperm sample. Well today when I went over the check on the ultrasound list she said "do you work here now? You've been here as long as I have!" I know she was just joking around, but um, ow? A similar thing happened with the receptionist at the uptown clinic. She was going through our info and was saying how we needed to re-do our blood work because they require it every six months. It hasn't been six months yet, and when I mentioned that she said "really? It feels like you've been here forever!" Again, she is so wonderful and sweet and really helps to make the experience much better, it just hurt to hear that. We really don't want to be there this long. Get us pregnant and out of your hair!

I'm really trying to be positive for this cycle, but it's hard. It feels like we hold out so much hope and then just get disappointed that it's easier to not hope so much. Dp feels the same way. I just feel like positivity counts for something and being so negative will not do us any favours.

I hope everyone is having a good weekend and is staying safe! I know the weather is quite bad in some areas.

[monkeyscience]

I just want to say to all of you going through emotional tough, or disappointing, or under-responsive cycles. I am reading along, just not getting a lot of time to respond. It seems like there are a lot of you ladies that are just having a rough time, and that sucks. I remember those emotional black holes, and I hope you come out of them soon!

I'm hoping wissa andbrichole are okay with all the storms - and anyone else who lives in those areas. (Can't think of anyone else who does, but I'm not sure.)

Just a couple of quick notes:

chica - Your chart is looking so beautiful! I so hope this is it!

shesaidboom - Totally love your wedding blog! Thank you for sharing. That does seem like such an awesome place for a wedding, especially with all the eco-friendly options. We just finally got our wedding album today (long story), and it is HUGE! But it brought back such wonderful memories looking through it. I hope IF does not cloud your wedding day. On the bright side, you know your fiance is rock-solid in staying with you, IF or no, through treatments and all - you are lucky to be getting such a great man. And I am sure he is lucky to be getting you, because from all you've said here and on the blog, you are pretty dang awesome yourself!

Also, I am laughing at the husbands/socks/hairy legs discussion. dh prefers me with thigh-high socks because he thinks it's sexy, but it's not a hair vs no-hair issue. I haven't found a bodily condition that will keep dh from coming after me if he's in the mood. But he does like it when I shave my legs. I, on the other hand, do not get turned on by dh's white ankle socks, so he usually takes them off.

And for those asking about wissa - hopefully she will update here soon, but she did put an update on the grads thread.

AFM, my mw appointment went well, tummy is growing and baby's heartbeat is good. Will be scheduling an ultrasound in 2-3 weeks for the anatomy scan and maybe we will see if baby is a boy or a girl.

[chicajones]

So about twenty minutes ago, I gave in. :-P Did two internet cheapies, but I really shouldn't have done it. Definitely not a BFP. I do feel like I can see a faint ghost line, but it could very easily just be an evap. Holding out till Tuesday for sure now, and praying my temp doesn't drop tomorrow (13 or 14DPO is when it usually drops). 

[SilaMarila]

Holding out hope for you Chica! Hoping it turns into a real line on Tuesday!

[toothfairy2be]

mexilady- I'm glad you had a good first visit with your RE. I've never heard of HCG for LP support, but if he thinks it works then that is great! I have had HCG trigger 4 times but I've always been on progesterone so I don't know which is supporting my LP. Typically I have about 11-12 days but start spotting around 7-8 DPO, frustrating. Did he talk to you at all about endometriosis? I didn't mind Femara symptom wise, but the 2 times I was on it I surged on my own and couldn't trigger. Will you be having any monitoring done if you aren't doing IUI? This is my first and only cycle on Gonal-F. I am switching to a NaPro doctor after this cycle and don't expect to return to the medicated way of life in the future. Not that the injections were bad for me, just my response was no better than on clomid or femara and those cost 10 dollars, the shots were nearly 700. Keep us posted with everything, you picked a great group of experienced (although we wish we werent!) women to join!

shesaidboom- Losing faith in my RE is where I am at right now... I'm ready to be going our seperate ways, honestly, I'm not sure they have much more to offer me. Your numbers sounded good for this IUI, so you never know, just takes one egg and one sperm. Although it would've been nice to get one of those good eggs from Femara instead of the injectables! At least now you are on the other side of the mountain, descent into the 2ww. I am going to test on St. Paddy's day!

monkey- I can't even believe you are a few short weeks away from your gender scan, amazing! When are you going to post your belly picture on the grad thread so we can see? I have to say, DH doesn't discriminate for hairy legs if he really wants it... I just feel sexier when everything is smooth... and ohh thigh highs! I just took out my lingerie from college and found some. I'm proud to say everything in the bag still fits- but I hope not for long!

chica- come on baby, stick and give chica a nice solid BFP on Tuesday!

AFM- IUI is scheduled for tomorrow at 9 am, I didn't even ask about doing it today so I'll have to tell my boss I have to go. I really want the best shot at a baby and if that means making me uncomfortable by having to be honest, then I guess it is a good lesson in sucking it up so I can go at the best time. Follicles yesterday were 17.8, 11.6, 13.7 on the left, and 10.8 on the right- so not quite measuring follicles for those smaller ones but at least some of them grew, which means they could be measuring by tomorrow, right? I wish they did another scan at IUI, but they do not. I did my trigger last night- had to sneak it into my friends bathroom during game night! DH and I had some of the best BDing we've had in years when we got home last night, so even if I'm not the most hopeful, I do feel like we gave it a good try and then onto a new chapter.

[Sourire]

Sila - thanks for the nutrition advice! It makes a lot of sense to me! I just went out and bought a TON of organic meat (and a bit of organic dairy), DH will flip out if he sees the bill haha. I already snack on nuts a lot and I'm a huge fan of coconut oil and especially coconut milk (I often use this instead of cow milk), but I'm going to try to eat way more avocados.

shesaidboom - That 2cm follicle of yours sounds just perfect! My fertility clinic only makes you redo the bloodwork after a year... well guess what, my first visit was in March 2011 so I now have a bunch of bloodwork to redo. It's so hard to believe I'm still TTC a year later!

teresa - I've updated your blurb. How did your shamanic healing go? I'd love to hear more about that. I will definitely try the thing about talking to my son, I like that idea.

cbaa - sorry to hear your follies are not responding too well. So far I've not been very impressed with you and shesaidboom's experiences with injectables!

mexilady - I've heard of HCG for LP support. The studies I've seen show that it's just as effective as progesterone. When I take progesterone though I keep taking it until I get a BFN at 15 DPO. How will you know when to stop the HCG? It will give you false positives on pregnancy tests for about 1.5 weeks after you take it (at least that's what happens with my Ovidrel injection).

I have developed a theory about LPD in the 1.5 years I've spent TTC on these boards with other people who have LP issues. If your LPD is not related to endometriosis, you'll probably get a BFP within 2 cycles of starting the meds that correct the problem. If you do have LPD though, it will take you a lot longer. This comes from seeing a lot of women with LPD get pregnant super fast once they started meds, and the only ones left are me and cbaa and we both have symptoms of endo. I hope you're in the first group!

chica - you sure have some "cajones" for testing at 12DPO haha! Anyways I'm sending you *WARM* vibes so your temps stays up until you get a BFP on Tuesday!

AFM - ski trip was mixed. I had some fun skiing but later in the day the conditions got pretty bad... visibility was almost 0 at the top of the mountain so we were skiing blind and on top of that there was an intense wind that would actually push you backwards up the hill when you were trying to ski down! Conditions were pretty good once you got past the very top part though. I did fall once but didn't get hurt so I'm not worried (my ski just randomly fell off lol). However I had a HUGE panic attack at the beginning of the day when I was tired (my dad kept me awake with his snoring all night), hungry, and pissed at my dad for not following the plan of meeting for breakfast (he decided to go off skiing instead meanwhile I was standing out in the cold waiting for him for over 30 mins)! I frequently have panic attacks when I'm on Crinone, and they're much more likely to happen if I'm hungry. It was not fun... I was sobbing my heart out, shaking, and everything around me felt like it was spinning. When we finally did go for breakfast I almost couldn't eat because I was shaking so hard that my food kept falling off my fork!

Also near the end of the day my dad's friend who was there with us fell on his head and got a concussion which was kind of scary... after that his speech was all slurred and he was acting really weird. We took him to a doctor who told us to stay with him for 6 hours but by the end of that period he was normal again, thank god. I've heard some really awful stories about people dying after hitting their heads.

[sj7235]

We are an unfortunate couple (31f, 31m). I had two MC’s (Mar-11 and June-11) & my husband was detected with balanced chromosome translocation (2, 11). We have had 3 doses of Clomid & 2 doses of Femara, no success till date. Doc says about two options now – (1) IUI with FSH (2) IVF with PGD. We are going for option (1) before finally deciding on (2). So my qns are ---

a)   Side-effects of FSH injection?
b)   Any experinence or comments on IVF with PGD?
 

[toothfairy2be]

sila- I must have missed your food advice earlier! Such good suggestions. I'm trying to figure out how to fit them into my life... I'm not a very 'adventurous' eater. I also gave up Bikram yoga but I know there are many lucky women who were pregnant in class.

sourire- glad you had a mostly fun ski trip, sorry your dad got you so stressed! I hope you felt better after you got some food in you! We always joke that my family turns into monsters when we get hungry, so I can't blame it on the progesterone, I'm always a crazy person if I haven't eaten!

sj7235- Welcome! Are you going to be joining us on your journey? I don't have much advice about the IVF with PGD but my acupuncturist has talked about a few patients who found out about a genetic condition and were only successful after PGD. Did your doctor mention to you why they think that FSH/IUI would work when clomid/femara hasn't with the translocation? We are having our IUI after Gonal-F (FSH) tomorrow. I personally didn't have any side effects with the injections. I made it though 6 nights with no bruising, no pain on injection (maybe a tiny bit once or twice because the solution was too cold- but it didn't last more than 10 seconds), no mood swings, no emotional outbursts, no night sweats, no headaches... I can't think of anything else I didn't have. I am feeling more crampy now pre-ovulation than I felt on the other drugs but my follicles are actually smaller than on clomid/femara, I don't know why the stims didn't stim better/bigger/more follicles for me, but I guess we will see if they are better quality. Good Luck!