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Mothering › Groups › November 2012 Due Date Club › Discussions › When will you tell?

When will you tell?

post #1 of 39
Thread Starter 

So far only my DH and my BFFs know about the pregnancy. Crazily enough, one of the two BFFs I told ALSO tested positive yesterday morning! I'm pumped.

 

I prefer to tell family in person so I think we're going to tell them around Easter since we'll all be together.

 

If we can tell our friends in person, we will, and then announce on Facebook at the end of first trimester.

 

How about you guys?

post #2 of 39

I haven't even told my DH yet, LOL...

 

 

We waited last time until 17 or 18 weeks?  It was hard to hide since I was pretty big.

Probably will wait that long again this time.  Definitely will wait until the 2nd trimester and as long as I can without being too pregnant.

I'm sure my family will be horrified since we just had a baby last Feb so I'm in no rush.

 

post #3 of 39

I told my partner right away. He was working from home when I took the test. Other than that I am pretty much just telling my closest friends (once I have eighteen high temps per TCOYF--not that I'm not sure I'm pregnant, but just a convenient milestone). I figure even if something goes wrong I will want my closest friends to know and support me.

 

Not sure when we will tell family. My family lives nearby, but my in-laws live 6 hours away and it'd be nice to tell them in person. They'll be here during Passover so we're thinking of getting everyone together and telling them then.

 

Also not sure when we'll tell my stepDD. My partner is non-custodial so she generally only has one weekend a month with us during the school year. She'll also be here during Passover so that may be the best time all around. She'll also be here later this month, so we could potentially tell her ahead of everyone else, but I don't like the idea of having her keep a secret (even a good one).

 

As for the Facebook announce, I'm not in a hurry to do that. That'll happen when it happens...maybe 2nd trimester. 

 

CityMama2Q, that's great about your friend! I don't think I'll have any close friends who'll be pregnant at the same time (although one never knows, I guess). Lucky you!

post #4 of 39

So far I've told my dh, my sis, my parents, his parents and 4 close friends. I feel like we can use a lot of prayer esp in the beginning months so I plan to tell another 2 close friends. I had wanted initially to tell most people after I hear the heartbeat but that still a few weeks away and I wanted some support should anything bad happen. 

 

 

post #5 of 39

I can't stand keeping happy secrets, so we went will telling everyone right away. Hopefully everything goes well, but if something happens, I will have lots of support is what I figure.

post #6 of 39

Right now only DH and I know. I POAS and we both watched the results come up. love.gif (with DS running and screeching in the background eyesroll.gif) Us not telling anyone yet (or really ME not telling anyone yet!) is not typical. I'ma huge blabbermouth! But this time around, I kinda feel like having a fun little secret. And honestly, it's about 90% as exciting as getting the BFP with DS. We are so very happy to be having a baby but now we've BTDT. It's easier to stay calm and happy this time than it was last time, if that makes any sense to anyone. It's very nice to rest in the delightful secret for a while. love.gif

 

We're telling our family on Saturday though! We're having a movie party and making pizzas as our excuse to get as many family members over as possible. Then when everyone is here we'll change DS's shirt to his new "I'm the big brother" shirt and wait until someone notices! I'm so excited about this, a little bit too much I think!

post #7 of 39

I told my husband right away.  I also told one of my close friends who has a little girl a couple months older than my son...and it turns out she's pregnant too!!  Just a couple weeks ahead of me.  We told my parents yesterday, but we'll wait a while before we tell the rest of my family or DH's family.  

 

I don't feel that comfortable telling a lot of people until I'm through the first trimester.  So right now I'm just telling the people whose support I'll need if there are any problems.  

 

It's getting really hard to keep it to myself though.  My sister in law, plus five of my cousins are pregnant or just gave birth.  It's hard to be surrounded by all the baby talk and not say anything. 

post #8 of 39

DH and I always do pregnancy tests together so we both knew at the same time. He has told his older daughter but we haven't told anyone else yet. We have held off because my brother got married on the weekend and we didn't want to distract any attention from them. We might tell my parents soon or we might wait until my brother and SIL are home from their honeymoon and tell everyone together. Probably depends a bit on morning sickness - last time it was pretty obvious.

 

After we tell the immediate family we'll start telling close friends and extended family and then put it on Facebook for everyone else. I doubt we'll last until 12 weeks before everyone knows though. I find it more fun to tell people than keep a secret.

post #9 of 39

I told my DH the night I found out. We told our 2 kids yesterday morning--my youngest (4.5) was really excited, and my daughter (7) went into a big cardboard box they had been playing in and shut the lid! Two totally different reactions! I can't keep a secret like this for long, so I called my parents this evening, which made my DH then call his parents. I'm sure they all will spread the news for me, although I asked them to hold off for a bit. I likely won't tell my coworkers for a few weeks, unless I'm having obvious symptoms and need to explain... I'm sure they don't want to fear getting a "stomach bug" from me :)

post #10 of 39

Oh, boy.  I don't know.  My husband and a couple of girl friends know, but I really don't know when to share with others as I learned of a missed miscarriage at around 8 weeks last time.  I would love to tell my grandmother on her birthday, March 22, and my dad and his b-day, April 4th, and others on Easter, but I will only be 11 weeks.  Also, I am an herbal medicine student.  We have a tight knit class of 12 women and are going on retreat at the end of March, so I can't imagine not bonding and spilling the beans to them then...We will see....Part of me thinks that I will miscarry again anytime and another is super confident that this heart beat is here to stay....

post #11 of 39

I'm not sure either! Of course I showed my husband the positive test right away, and then told my mom later that night. If I don't start feeling sick, I think I might wait until I'm 12 weeks to tell the kids and everyone else. I've had several miscarriages and so each pregnancy I feel different about when I want to tell. Sometimes I want to wait, and sometimes I want everyone to know right way, so that if I do miscarry, I have lots of support.

post #12 of 39

Not sure yet. DH knows and a couple of close friends but as far as everyone else we haven't shared yet. I would like to do something fun since this is our last but don't know what to do? I will have to tell soon since the icky-ness is creeping in...

 

post #13 of 39

Well, we caved and told the family last night lol.gif So we'll probably start telling close friends soon I guess. I'll also have to let work know soonish because I'll be having the baby there and I want to tell them before my blood results start turning up at the antenatal clinic.

post #14 of 39
We've told everyone already. My husbands way of accepting the pregnancy was to put it on Facebook. I protested at first but I needed him to feel better so I let him. There are distant friends that don't know but most of our family does. And we've told our kids as well. They don't seem to get it yet. My five year old wants the baby to be here now. We've talked about pregnancy a lot so she knows it will be a long time. Ten minutes is forever for them. smile.gif
post #15 of 39

When we talked about this before we started TTC we planned on waiting.  Yeah, that didn't happen.  Hubby knew right away, as I felt it would be a nice way to wake him up on our anniversary (yes, I got my BFP on my 8th anniversary).  Most of my coworkers knew that we were trying, so when I went in to work last Thursday with a permagrin on my face, they knew.  I didn't have to say it, lol.  My online horse community knows, too.  

 

But so far, no family.  We're telling my mom first and I want it to be in person.  She works a normal M-F, 9-5 job, I work random 12-hr night shifts, and hubby's in school full time, so finding a time when all three of us are available isn't easy.  Luckily, she's able to take a 1/2 day at work this Friday and is coming up to our place under the premise of using some gift certificates we both got to a local meat market before we forget about them and to enjoy our new TV.  Every time I talk to her on the phone, I swear my tongue is bleeding by the time we hang up from biting it so much, lol.  After she knows, we'll call my dad (cross-country truck driver), and then the rest of the family can be told.

 

I have to share how we're going to tell my mom.  I've controlled my horrible baby fever over the past few years by buying stuff... hitting up consignment shops for clothes, stocking up on cloth diapers, etc.  Whenever I have a good haul, I show it off to her.  Well, I recently had a good haul at Goodwill up in Madison that I haven't shown her, yet.  I'm going to sneak in a onesie that I made that says "My First Christmas" with the comment of I just couldn't refuse it.  She'll make a comment like "How do you know you'll even be able to use this?", and that's when I'll spring it on her.  Hubby will be poised just outside the room with the camera ready to go to try and capture the moment on camera.

 

I just have to make it to Friday...

post #16 of 39
Quote:
Originally Posted by nemrac917 View Post

 

I have to share how we're going to tell my mom.  I've controlled my horrible baby fever over the past few years by buying stuff... hitting up consignment shops for clothes, stocking up on cloth diapers, etc.  Whenever I have a good haul, I show it off to her.  Well, I recently had a good haul at Goodwill up in Madison that I haven't shown her, yet.  I'm going to sneak in a onesie that I made that says "My First Christmas" with the comment of I just couldn't refuse it.  She'll make a comment like "How do you know you'll even be able to use this?", and that's when I'll spring it on her.  Hubby will be poised just outside the room with the camera ready to go to try and capture the moment on camera.

 

I just have to make it to Friday...



Awww, how sweet! Isn't it fun thinking up ways to tell peopleI love it!!!

post #17 of 39

I told my DH and my sister but that's it. I am not telling anyone else until I am at least 12 weeks. I told my sister only because I needed to tell someone how shocked I was, hopefully she won't tell anyone else but she has been known to have a big mouth. I doubt this pregnancy will be met with a warm reception since I already have 5 kids and the youngest is only 10 months. Actually my family has never been approving of any of my pregnancies so I am not looking forward to the annoucement. 

post #18 of 39

We told our close family members pretty much right away (after a couple of days). I had a surgery scheduled that we had to cancel if I was pregnant but didn't know it yet, so everyone who knew I would have the surgery knew that it was contingent on my pregnancy test result. We're also really excited and find it impossible to keep such a fun secret to ourselves!

post #19 of 39

Oh it's so hard NOT to tell! :P

 

My husband knew right after I did last night!  I'm not telling my mom until... I don't know. 8 or 12 weeks. I'm really nervous about that (she does NOT want grandkids. I think she'll come around a little, but I still am scared to tell her.)  I told my friend who is 17 weeks pregnant, because as this is my first (and she's on her second) I needed SOMEONE to ask advice from, and she knew I was buying a test so she wanted to know the results. Told one other close friend. (both bridesmaids of mine.)

 

My husband wants to tell his mom and probably will soon. (I hope she can keep it from spreading through his whole family for a month at least :P)

 

We have a few other friends who know we were trying, and who the first time we hang out with them, will most likely guess when I refuse a drink or smoke! It will be hard to keep from them.

 

I want to tell my other close friend, but otherwise will try to wait as long as possible to make it public. It's such a huge thing for us that I totally want to shout it from the rooftops, but I'm going to just have to wait :P

 

 

post #20 of 39

I told my husband and my sister right away. DH and I will probably tell our parents soon, after I get another BFP. Everyone else is going to have to wait a while, because I have a history of miscarriage and there's nothing worse than having to go back to dozens of people and explain to them that you're not pregnant anymore. But we want our family to know, either way.

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