February '09 Mamas ~ Childhood Chat :) - Page 25

[Mal85]

Hi all, just got back from our vacation. Wow, that was a loooooong drive! We took 2 days to get there and 2 days to get back. Stopped in Memphis on the way down and stopped in St. Louis on the way back. We were able to stay with our St. Louis friends and spent most of the day with them before heading home today. We had a really great time. The beach was just a short walk from the house. Owyn had a blast playing in the sand all week and enjoying the pool we had at the house. We went out one day for mini-golf, go karts and kiddie rides. She is still talking about the go karts, she just loved that! She gave us a good scare on our second day when she made her way down to the pool by herself and fell in. I had just had her in the pool the day before practicing swimming under water on her own. Thank God that was fresh in her mind, she was able to get to the side and get out of the pool. My niece found her sitting beside the pool, crying. I had left her in the upstairs duplex with DH and he thought she had walked downstairs to find me... apparently the pool distracted her. Needless to say, the pool gate was locked the rest of the week. 

Now, I need a week of Mommy-only vacation to recover from all this travel! I do have to say, though, the girls were awesome in the car. Greta had a few moments, but usually when she was fighting sleep and not for too long. It took us 13.5 hours to get to St. Louis yesterday with only 2 stops and they did so great! It's really great to be home now though. Back to real life. Back-to-school meetings start in the morning. 

I'll come back later to do personals, girls are needy...

[Nillarilla]

Wow Mal that's crazy! So glad she's ok and the rest of your vacation was good. 

[AKislandgirl]

Oh Mal! I'm so glad that she was ok. That is so scary!

[starling&diesel]

Terrifying!  Oh, to think ... makes me shudder.  I'm so glad that she knew what to do!  One of my biggest fears is that one of us thinks that the other has E or H and doesn't.  

[Vegan Princess]

I agree - I think it's pretty amazing she knew what to do!!! That is nothing short of a miracle! So glad she was ok Mal.

[mckittre]

Wow Mal.  That's amazing. I'm so glad she's OK. I know K wouldn't have been able to do that.

Between multiple grandmas and other folks around, and letting the kids play outside, I swear it's nearly every other day I have a moment of "wait, I thought you had that kid?" "No, I thought you did?".  Luckily, our piece of land lacks open water, is bordered by difficult-for-small-child brush, and is far from the busy road. There are bears, but the dog will usually warn us, and they're exceedingly unlikely to cause trouble.  Always gets my heart pounding just a little, though.

Cindy - 11 kids visiting sounds crazy. I'm glad she had fun. I never model how to play with toys either, and K has no interest in other kids, so I'm sure he's lagging on some of those skills. I figure it's OK, they'll all figure it out when they're interested.

Sue - Sorry about your dog. Funny that M has 7 teeth already. L only has 8, and she's 19 months old!

Starling - No idea about how to become independently wealthy, but I've gotten pretty good at the cheapskate part of the game. Cities are harder for that, though.

It's been chilly here lately, and starting to get dark again (as in the sun sets at 10PM, and if you wake up in the middle of the night you actually need to turn a light on). Feels like summer is over already...  :(

[Thursday Girl]

Last night laying in bed I thought, "wow I haven't talked to June's ddc for awhile, I wonder how they are?" Lots of traveling happening among us all. I am currently in North Carolina with my twin sister who is due to have her baby (she's due in 1-5 weeks) soon, I am super excited, plus I have missed her like crazy, not overly fond of living far away from her.  I sat down over 2 hours ago to write this and got distracted, now I forget what I was going to say to everyone. Let me refresh myself. (scrolls up and rereads)

Mal, that is super scary, I am 100% that June would not have made it out of an encounter like that, truly a miracle.

Cindy, is your house a bit quieter? I warned my sister over and over before we came that my four kids would be shocking. To go from childless to four very rambunctious kids in your orderly house is a lot to deal with, they are actually doing (they my sister and BIL) way better than I thought. 

Sue- sorry about your dog, the loss of a beloved pet is so hard, how wonderful that your friend was able to hold her though.

Erin- I LOVE those photos, so beautiful!!

gah- I know there is more but I need to wrangle my kids into cleaning. I'll be back

[Nillarilla]

Hello ladies,

Again Mal nothing short of a miracle neither of my kids can swim. My 6 year old is on his way to learning but nowhere near there yet. Both would panic I'm sure. Thank you for sharing swim lessons will be the next thing I book.

Thursday sounds so great for you to be with your sister do you get to stay after the birth for a bit?

Starling I am loving following your story on fb and the blog. Your kids are just so beautifully squishy

Erin your photos are breath taking I envy your cheapskate lifestyle.

Cindy I'm so glad that Makenna enjoyed her cousin time. My SIL was here for 5 days and ds informed her that he wants cousins by the time he is 9. My kids do not have any cousins yet other than 2nd and 3rd cousins. So they will be much older when they do. My brother might be the first to have kids and they are just getting married in Sept. both my dh and I are the oldest and we had our kids young in the scheme of things these days.

AFU: No vacation yet. One mini overnight camp which the kids loved and was way to short. We did that instead of me studying for my exam :p Turned out ok though I got 94% Thank heavens for multiple choice and a great memory. Dh and I are headed out on an overnight hike at Berg lake this weekend. I am terrified as I've never done anything like this. I am now in what I think is pretty good shape but we haven't practiced really other than some short hikes in which I hauled Cordelia in a pack. My classes are done and my coop is almost done. I am looking forward to a fuller bank account that's for sure. I am staying on in IT though so I can be a part of some of the cool projects. I have a report due to my boss this am that I am totally not ready to share but he wants to work on it together so I've got to get moving. I will check in later. I'm glad to see this group chatting again. I miss you ladies.
 

[mckittre]

Nilla - have fun on the hike!

Both my husband and I are oldests, and my kids have no cousins either, and no prospects for them any time soon (siblings all single, with one still in college). I had such a good relationship with my cousin who was 6 months older than me, so I kind of miss that for them. At least my 2 are close enough in age to play, I hope.

Starling - I saw that picture E did on your blog. And even with help - wow! K still holds his pens all wrong and rarely ever makes anything other than random scribbles and an occasional very misshapen letter. Which is fine of course, but makes me wonder about my parental failings for not doing either crafts or music with my kids much. (I love photography, and used to really enjoy oil painting, but it's hard for me to remember to bother with markers and kid paint).

Speaking of that... I've been wondering, at what age do you think kids start to develop their own interests - more separate from the stuff their family does? Within the stuff we regularly do, K certainly has favorite activities, and ones he doesn't care much about. But I feel like he couldn't possibly develop a sudden interest in basketball or dancing or horses or something, because he just doesn't have the opportunity to realize the full spectrum of things he might be interested in. (He also realizes very little of the full spectrum of things he might beg us to buy him or feed him, which I am eternally grateful for). When does that happen? Or am I wrong that it does? Does it require school/peer interactions?

[Thursday Girl]

nilla, enjoy the hike, it sounds like fun.

Erin- my kid started after she went to school, but i guess it wasn't until the second year maybe. she was 4.

[Everrgreen]

mckittre - I try and introduce R to different things and I figure at some point down the road he will want to focus on something specific (and hope he does because I think it's really important to find something you can excel at).  His dad was a pro golfer so he might have that in him and I have taken him to the driving range and will continue with that.  I'll probably have him try different sports, also music/dance.  I think too as he gets older I'll be able to tell what areas he might find more interesting.  This fall I would like to do something with music/dance but it's hard to find stuff.  I really want him to learn an instrument at some point too.  Sports (and he can focus on a specific one) will likely be his main interest.. But we'll see!

RE Family - R doesn't really have any first cousins.. Well there's 3 on my ex's side but they are older and we don't see them much (last time was Christmas).  My 2 cousins live nearby and have young kids so those are R's 'cousins' (2nd cousins technically, I think?)  I worry sometimes about R's lack of immediately family.  Most of the time it's just the 2 of us and it seems like such a boring childhood.  No dad, no siblings.  Just us.  I feel bad about that :/

Courtney - I've seen your NC pics and it looks like you're enjoying yourself!  I think you are right near where I lived when I was there (Davidson, on Lake Norman).  I loved that area :)

Mal - Oh wow, I'm so glad she knew what to do.  How scary!  R can't swim yet.  And actually he's somewhat afraid of the water (swimming lessons have been tough) so I doubt he would even go near enough to fall in.  You never know though.  Scary...

AFM - Life's been busy.  I have my final exam for my summer course on Monday.  And I've just been having a hard time with life in general.  I'm feeling a bit depressed.  Oh well :/

[Mal85]

Thanks ladies. I had to just make myself not think about the what-ifs after she fell in. I had a mini-panic attack that afternoon thinking about it, but had to just let it go, learn from it and move on. Just very thankful she was okay. It definitely made me re-think how great it would be to have a house with a pool though!

RE family: That is definitely an area where we are so lucky. Owyn has several cousins that were born the same year as her and is super close to all of them, as well as some of her older and younger cousins. Greta is the youngest of the grandkids, she has one cousin that is 6 months older than her. But he lives in a different town. However, our group of friends is like another family to us and there are two other baby girls that were born within 6 months of Greta, so she will always have them. 

Different activities: I would imagine it would come with the start of school. Owyn's friend was taking dance class last year, just an 8 week intro thing for toddlers. She invited Owyn to take a friend night, which is what made Owyn fall in love with it. She starts in her class in a couple of weeks. Dance is the first and only thing she has taken an interest in herself. 

Art: I saw Starling's post too. I keep waiting for Owyn to start drawing things, she hasn't yet. She likes to trace. She has some stencils she uses and asks me to write people's names so she can trace them. With coloring books, she does a great job coloring in the lines. She hates when she gets out of the lines and has to start over with a new picture when she does. But if it's just blank paper and crayons/markers, she still just scribbles.

Courtney: Do you get to stay with your sister for the birth? What a special time! I'm sure she is glad to have your expertise on her side!

Been going to meetings all week and getting my classroom ready. We've already made two trips to the city... one to get Owyn new shoes for the school year, try on dance shoes, and find a new outfit for her first day of school. Another to get supplies for my classroom. Back-to-school shopping for the both of us is taking forever! We just got her school supply list in the mail and it made me a little teary to think I'm school supply shopping for my baby girl! The next couple of weeks are so busy between open house at my school, open house at her school, open house at the gym for her dance class, back-to-school picnics for everyone. I guess this is just the beginning!

[Everrgreen]

Starling - Wow!  Just saw the post with E's painting.  Very impressive!  R mostly just scribbles, he doesn't colour in the lines, he can draw some shapes..  Here is an example of the best thing R has drawn ('people' on our chalkboard wall - he was trying to copy something I had done where I'd traced his body on the wall and then added the face :P)

[starling&diesel]

Nilla ... Exciting about the hike!  And great news about your exam result.  Rock it, Mama!  And GOOD FOR YOU for being in shape.  That's a big goal of mine.  I miss my trail-running/kickboxing days.  I took H out of the carrier the other day and thought about how heavy he is at 25 lbs or so, and then it hit me that I need to lose that, at least.  I need to lose the same weight as he is.  That sure put it into perspective.

Mal ... Heck, I've had a panic attack about O's pool incident and I've never even properly met you!  Nice to hear that you're enjoying your back to school activities and that you're excited about the coming year.

Cindy ... I forgot about the LAs!  I'll send them today!  Sorry!  

Courtney ... You do look like you're having a wonderful time!  Remind us, how long are you staying?

Erin ... Failings as a parent?  Gah!  Ridiculous!  I look at your life and wonder why we don't live rurally and what my children are missing out because of it!

Ever ... Yay for your course nearly being finished!  How're things in the love life department?

As for cousins, our children have two that they have relationships with, but they are much older.  Like, 8 & 17yrs old.  So not close, really.  And they live in Ontario.  I do have a brother who has a couple of children, but I haven't spoken to him in nearly a decade, and those children are older too.  The girls from the same batch of embryos are cousin-like and live closer.  When we see them, I'm reminded of my relationships with my cousins.  Easy to pick up where you left off, and age doesn't matter too much if the gap isn't too big.  They play so well together.  I hope to nurture that relationship more.

As for the blog and all it's sparkly wonderfulness ... please do keep in mind that it is very contrived and doesn't depict my daily life beyond the snippet it represents.  I don't like that blogs make women question their parenting or lifestyle.  That's a big reason why I never wanted to do a blog in the first place.  But here we are, on a mission from my publisher, and so I'm doing it as well as I can, which means trying to make it as appealing and luscious as possible with the hopes of making some money from it.  I don't like thinking of my life as potential blog posts at all.  I resent it.  And I resent that I'm writing for FREE.  Not my thing.  

As for art, specifically, Esmé has never had colouring books, mostly because the couple of times she's tried them at friend's she gets very frustrated when she can't stay in the lines.  So we don't have them at home.  She is very artistic and makes art every day, usually on her own.  She's always had good fine motor skills and can hold her pen properly now.  But this is the child who could not climb a ladder or incline of any kind at the playground until this summer.  These kids are all over the map with skills and interests.

As for interests (almost forgot about that one) ... I think about this a lot.  I don't want to overschedule us AT ALL, so she won't be getting a lot of classes to try out things.  I'm hoping she'll see things at events or hear about them from friends and then express and interest that she can then pursue.  She loves the funky rebel neighbourhood marching band, for example and seeks them out at all local events.  So that's something I'd help her connect with when her bedtime moves a little later.  They've invited her to their rehearsals, but they start at 8 and she's asleep by then.  Until she starts asking, I guess her interests are extensions of mine.  Art?  Writing?  Reading? Hahahaha!

[Vegan Princess]

Starling: No rush! This kiddo better not be needing the LAs any time soon! 

Everr: Your ex is a pro golfer? Makes me think of Tiger Woods and all his discretions. I'm sorry you are down! Good luck on your final!

Art. Makenna LOVES art. We do TONS of projects (mostly ideas I steal off blogs) and have tons of art tools fully accessible. She does it daily too and I too rarely have given her coloring books. But she still mostly scribbles and does not draw people/faces, etc. I too was floored by E's painting. You definitely have a budding artist on your hands Starling! :-)

Makenna has been requesting gymnastics and dance classes lately. I've been reluctant to sign her up though bc she is so clingy around other kids. Timing is not good anyway with new sessions starting about when baby is due. So I think we will focus on getting her acclimated to preschool next month and then revisit the lesson idea in January. Perhaps being around other kids at school will change her opinion about being in a class with other kids.

Cousins. You all know Makenna has a ton - mostly thanks to my brother. She has 14 cousins between my brother and sister and 3 more on DH's side. Probably half are young enough for her to enjoy playing with. But none of them live anywhere near us. So she has a fantastic time when she sees them and then tells me daily how much she misses them. She has 2 distant cousins that live 1/2 hour away (their grandpa is my MIL's cousin). She has been begging to see them despite them being 8 and 11. So we are having them over for dinner this weekend. 

Ok gotta run. Mold remediation people will be arriving momentarily to rip open my master closet and a plumber is arriving too to fix a leak in the basement and then whatever we find in the closet (shares a wall w/bathroom). Yay!

Cindy

[AKislandgirl]

Hi Friends! Feels like fall here! Can't believe its getting dark when I go to bed now- 10ish. I baked pumpkin spice cake twice this week!

Nilla: your hike sounds awesome. I'm way out of shape. I told DH that when he gets back from his last trip to sea I'm going to excercise by myself 2 x a week. My back and hips are really bothering me. The only time I'm pain free is when I do yoga regularly so it has to happen.

Cousins: My girls have tons but we don't live near them. That is part of why I loved this last vacation. They have 14 cousins on my side ranging in age from 26 to 2. All but one was with us on vacation. It was really fun to see all the kids together. I really hope we can move closer soon.

Art: Fiona draws people as giant circles with lines coming out for arms and legs. Sometimes with added feet or hands. Circle for eyes, lines for a mouth. It's pretty cool to see her drawing progress. She drew one picture of "papa crying" with tears coming down because he had to go home first and missed us when we were playing with sidewalk chalk one day. We haven't pulled off a project like E's though yet. I loved how that turned out! She is beginning to write letters now too and is very interested in letter sounds. I don't really do many projects with an end in mind yet. Mostly free for all and it ends up with her painting her whole body or getting as messy as possible. I don't mind that- I think she needs that sensory stuff more then others sometimes. With that in mind, I think I'll set her up with some colored vinegar and baking soda and a dropper this afternoon!

Interests: I do think her interests are mostly based on ours for now. She loves to read the fish ID book for example! Very into specifics such as what type of rock fish- just calling it a rock fish will not do. But some things seem more her own. When we listen to music she notices when violins are playing for example. Neither of us play any kind of instrument although we do have shakers and a hand drum here for toys. She REALLY want to learn to play. I hope we can find someone to teach her since we learned the one lead was a loser. I'm also very cautious of over scheduling so we will see what activities we get involved in as the years go by.

[Vegan Princess]

Sue: I can't believe you're saying it feels like fall! The idea of fall is kinda freaking me out bc that means baby time!! Joanne's Fabric has had fall/thanksgiving stuff out for like a month now! I absolutely love autumn though. I love candles that are scented like spice and pumpkins. I love all the cutesy pumpkin decor, scare crows, sunflowers, etc. But right now it's still summer. :-) Mind sharing your pumpkin spice cake recipe? Sounds yummy!

So the plumbing and mold remediation went really well and was way less intensive than I feared! Turns out there was no leak behind the wall. There was a small amount of mold that they got rid of - don't know why it was there. But it turns out our plumbing is in great shape, other than the small leak we had in the basement. So that is a huge relief! Only crappy part is that they had to leave the huge air purifier and dehumidifier running for 3 days. It's way too loud to sleep in there! So Makenna and I are sleeping on the futon in the basement. I'm already miserable in my soft bed - not anticipating good sleep the next few nights!

I'm excited...our area has an email list serve that goes out to 10s of thousands of parents. There is a marketplace email, advice email, reccomendations and announcements. The announcements email always has a section for playgroups and connections. I was lucky to find my mom's group on there when M was 2 months old. We met regularly until the little ones were about 2. But I still see 4 of the moms on a regular basis - they are my good friends and their daughters are M's best friends. I just posted an ad today trying to start a 2nd time moms group. I'd love to have something like that for the new baby - for her to have her own friends to grow with. It seems lots of 2nd kids don't end up with many of their own friends bc mom is so busy w/#1. I know it's going to be hard to coordinate all these women with varying preschool and nap schedules, etc. But I really hope I can make it work. I've received 10 emails already in the few hours since the email went out. 2 moms have 3.5 yr olds who will be doing afternoon preschool too (like M) and are due within 2 weeks of me. 

Cindy

[Mal85]

Sue-- I'm so ready for it to feel like fall. I'm in the middle of the country, so right in the thick of this massive heat wave we've had going all summer. It made it really hard to get out and do everything I wanted to do with the girls this summer. We didn't get to go swimming nearly as much as I'd like, not enough trips to the park, etc. I had intentions of walking every morning with the girls, which we did the first few weeks, but once the heat started it was just miserable to get out in it. I am SO ready for some cooler weather and some rain!

Cindy-- Your mom's group sounds like fun! It's a really great idea. Greta has always just gone with our plans for Owyn. Luckily she has those two babies her age around. 

Registration was last night at work and I'm currently sitting at 4 kids in my class. Not enough. The school board was waiting it out through registration, hoping we'd get more sign up, which hasn't  happened yet. So, I will probably be having a meeting with them soon to figure out what we're going to do. We chatted a little earlier this week about it and threw some ideas around, so we'll see what happens. There is a new learning center opening in town, so I wouldn't be surprised if a lot of families are trying them out this year. I did get a chance to chat with some of my new co-workers though, so that was nice. Last year, I was the baby of the bunch with most of the other teachers being near retirement age. This year our staff is mostly around the same age, so it's nice to have something in common with them. 

[Thursday Girl]

cindy- that's very cool about the email group. we often struggle with the four girls finding a balance with each ones friends. Sometimes one girls friend's dominate the scene, only later to have that same girls friends entirely absent. Having the 9 year to newborn spread means sometimes it's just big kids and sometimes just little kids and sometimes kids in between, I try to start get together's that include all their friends but it often doesn't work out.

cousins- my girls have 5 cousins they rarely see, they live in New York  and are from 16-5 I believe. My newest niece will be born soon, and this from my twin and they will live an 11 hour drive away, which means they won't see each other often. It's this cousin that isn't around that makes me sad.

Art- Juniper enjoys art and often tells me she needs to do art, mostly it is not led by me although  I will often introduce a new medium for her to work with. I also keep supplies available.  As for introducing them to the sport or activity they will love, I don't think you can at this age, you can offer a variety but you just can't know what they will like, and it's more about exposing them to a variety, even if it's them watching something, and then finding out what they have an interest in. I really want my girls to have something gthey are passionate about, something they can focus on as preteens and teens to help keep them from undesirable activities. I have not yet found something for my 9 year old despite her being in a variety of different activities when she was younger (3-6 years) and I am much more concerned about that than with Juniper not having something. 

North Carolina- I am not sure how much longer I will be here. A week after My Niece Quinn is born. She is in the window starting Tuesday I believe and I hope she has the baby sooner so I can get back home with my kids and husband. School starts the 20th and the big girls will all be going back with him (and Junie is included in the big girls) she is having a really hard time being away from home and adjusting to her new sister (who is 4 months and this is generally the age trouble beings with a new sibling.

[Everrgreen]

Count me in as ready for fall!  We're having a bit of cool weather here and I love it - high of 20oC, cloudy and rainy :)  I'm also looking forward to going back to school.  Although I still need to enjoy my 3 weeks between the end of the summer course and the new classes!

I wish I had more mom friends.  I've moved around too much :(  And it's so much harder to connect at this age (especially because I'm not home with him anymore and we're busy).  R gets enough socializing at daycare though and I have lots of babysitters around so I can take a weekend to go see my regular old friends (none of them live in the same city either though..)  

Cindy - That's good your problem was a quick fix.  That stuff can be pricey!  And yeah my ex and Tiger had a couple things in common :P  He quit right before I found out I was pregnant and we moved back to Canada.  It's a very tough sport to make it in so it didn't work out for him.

Starling - I love reading about your adventures on your blog :)  As for my love life it sucks.  Bus guy and I broke up again.  He's going through major work stress and it was ruining our time together.  He was a bit emotionally unavailable too..  Which was getting annoying.  I'm so tired of being alone.  It seems I rarely meet anyone worth dating.  Oh well.  Maybe when I'm back in school :/