February '09 Mamas ~ Childhood Chat :) - Page 4

[mckittre]

A busy place the last few days!

Kate and Courtney - Exciting how close it's getting for both of you!  I hope it's soon.

Sue - poor Maeve!  I've never seen croup, but it sounds awful.

Starling - thanks for the audiobook ideas.  I think K would love that.  And it's nice to hear that my kid isn't the only one obsessed with letters and words right now.  I was worried he's been watching too much of mom and dad typing on the computer.

Nilla - we've got a pretty solid bedtime routine here as well.  Toothbrushing, pjs, then listen to a story from dad while in bed.  His bed is in our room (since our whole house is our room), but he stays in it without problems.  I'm not sure if that's because we really started pushing it before L was born, or because something just finally clicked with him.

AFM - We've been out of town for the last several days to the "big city" across the bay (about 6,000 people), giving some interviews, a presentation, and going to a science conference.  And of course, doing about a million errands, shopping, doctors and dentist appointments along the way.  I must say, traveling with a 3 year old is way easier than with a 1 year old.  Katmai could understand our explanations of what was happening, didn't mind being watched by our friends when we had to do a presentation, mostly listened about what stuff he was allowed to use in other people's houses, and was interested in the new surroudings.  Lituya, on the other hand, wanted to cling to me for the entire 4 days, and was generally fussy and unsettled.

So I think 3 is a pretty good age.  That said, as soon as we got back home, we got back into the tantrums every time L touches anything K was playing with.  Which happens often.  Even more, since she's figured out she gets such a good reaction from it.  That one I have no idea how to solve...

[Vegan Princess]

Erin: Welcome back!

I just had to share this link. My friend showed me this website where people alter ikea products. I love this idea. They use an ikea storage unit as steps upto a loft bed. The bed is much lower than your typical bunk bed, so good for younger kids. DH is getting annoyed about overflowing toys so we started thinking about how to organize her room. Her room is fairly small and she will have to share it with kid #2 (who will sleep in our room for a long time but will need a dresser). But I think this is great! M sooo wants the bed and the tent. Even though she understands mommy and daddy can't fit in the tent to lay with her. I found the bed used for $85 and the tent used for $15. The organizer sells used for $30. You can put a toddler bed underneath, like in the pic, make the underneath into a reading nook with a curtain and cushions and lights inside, or put another twin mattress on the floor.

http://www.ikeahackers.net/2011/11/ladder-into-steps.html

Hope all are well! It's pouring rain here and will for 5 days. Today it's a nice change. We're doing lots of art projects. Tomorrow we're going to go to ikea and check this stuff out in person. They have lots of toys to play with at ikea and a cafe - so that fills up time on a rainy day. LOL. 

Cindy

[Mal85]

Oh how I wish I had an Ikea near me! I have a feeling I would spend way too much time (and money!) there, though. The closest one to me is about 8 hours away. That bed does look awesome though! 

We are having beautiful weather here right now! Yesterday it was mid-70s and sunny, today it's over 80 and sunny and should be this way the rest of the week. I think we might get some rain on Thursday but still warm temps. I'm really hoping this weather sticks around and spring really kicks in. We've actually had a really mild winter, so I can't complain too much. It is nice to see colder weather come to an end though. It also means the end of the school year is that much closer. I can't wait to spend the summer with my girls! I have been waiting for that all year! 

We've been praying for my dad. He works in production (a printing plant) and his company is selling. He just found out last week. The same thing happened to him 10 years ago and he's had a rough go ever since. He took a big pay cut to stay in this area and a couple of years ago, they downsized and he got another pay cut plus some of his paid vacation was taken away. Now, they're selling to a company over two hours away. He's feeling pretty defeated. He only needs a job for 3 more years before he can retire and now he's feeling like he should retire early, which would be a huge hit to them financially. I just hate to see him going through this at his age, when he's so close to retirement. It was bad enough 10 years ago when he was in his 50s, it'd be damn near impossible for him to find a decent job in his 60s... Anyway, keep him in your prayers. DH and I are talking about selling the house a little earlier to move in with them sooner and help them with their bills. We're just waiting to see what he finds out from the new company...

As for Owyn, she really cracks me up lately. She personifies everything! Different size blocks become a family with a dad and a mom and a baby. Even her fingers become little people. It's so funny to watch her!

We're off to bbq with friends tonight and take advantage of the awesome weather and longer days!

[AKislandgirl]

Hi guys- sickness ending up getting us all but I think we are all on the mend now.

Courtney: Love the B's! :) Can't believe how soon until Coraline is here!!!!

Kate: You too- baby will be here so soon. I have to smile picturing your pregnant self trying to crawl into Aub's toddler bed! :)

Nilla: At what age were your kids able to be put to bed on their own? And how did you manage without lots of tears? Maybe its a personality thing- Fiona still won't go for that but maybe M will? Did you just inch out of their room over time?

Cindy: Love the ikea hacks site. I've seen some pretty cool ones with that same bunk bed. Fiona was just looking at the pictures with me. She wants me to sleep on top with one of the dogs. Her, Papa, and Maeve and the other dog will sleep on the bottom! Ha! Makes me laugh in many ways- first that she pictures us all together forever in any bed, and second that she would sleep with her Papa and not me! In my dreams! The girl wakes up crying a lot lately and seriously freaks out if he tries to comfort her instead of me- like if I'm up with Maeve or something. Sigh. Someday she'll be big and not want anything to do with me so I should just except it now!

We were just talking about moving and I said maybe we should sell a lot of our stuff rather then pay to move it, "because we can always go to Ikea." DH laughed at me- "they aren't everywhere, they aren't like Starbucks!" I know but man, that store sure is fun! I had a fun little daydream about shopping there for our new house (which is also only a daydream right now! Ha!).

Mal and Erin: I'm also jealous that your DH's can put our kids to bed. Have they always been fine about that or was it something you had to work on?

Sorry to hear about your dad Mal. Totally sucks. I hope you guys moving in helps all of you out.

I bought a used food dehydrator yesterday. So excited! Going to dry some pears today.

[Nillarilla]

Sue - I'm going to dehydrate some apples today. I bought a dehydrator a few months back and I've done Kale chips and apples but that's it. 

As far as bed goes I think the thing that makes it easier is that they are together. Ds was good until about 3 years of age on his own and then he started freaking out at night. So we eventually bought a twin and put it in our room and him and Dee slept in that bed in our room until she was about 18 months or so. Then we moved the twin and a mattress into their room and they went in there together. It was easy enough if I remember correctly. But if they weren't together I think we would have more issues. I worked on it when they were babies though easing myself out of the room. I started by touching but not picking up. Then sitting but not touching. Then sitting by the door. Then just leaving. It took a while and some backwards and forwards. But it might just be a personality thing I don't know. 

Cindy- If I had an ikea near me I would totally get that bed. I've looked at it many times but it costs too much to ship. 

[justKate]

Reading along but can't properly respond b/c DH took the "good" computer to CA and i can't get internet on the one that's here. Thinking of you all though.

[Vegan Princess]

Nilla: I'm so jealous you got to move your kids without much fuss! M swears she will fall asleep without us if she is in her tent - but I seriously doubt that!!!

So I went to Ikea today. I found all the stuff on craigslist and then they all got sold. So we just decided to get it new. I bought the bed tent and a cute flower light to go in the space underneath. I'll make that into a play area for now w/her bean bag and book shelves and a little armchair she has. I may attempt to sew curtains that have a door and windows. But I am so not crafty! Anyway, the bed turned out to be way longer and heavier than I thought it was going to be. Too much for me to deal with. I would have had to tie the car shut and it is pouring rain and I wouldn't have been able to get it in the house. So DH will stop by on his way home one day and get it. DH really wants to do the steps - he doesn't think she will be able to manage the ladder at night. I think we need to let her try and see. They wouldn't let you try out the ladder in the store. Anyway, I'm excited to get it all set up! 

Makenna was begging to be left at the free babysitting play area at Ikea. She cried when we left and she hadn't gone. I didn't leave her bc we were there w/her best friend - why bother. I've never left her before. But heck - she wants to be left so bad. I'm going to go back and browse around more and let her play. Sounds like a nice break!! I didn't really look around much today bc my friend's kids had had enough.

Cindy

[mckittre]

Cindy - that bed looks cute!  We have vague plans to build a loft in the yurt some day and put our bed up on it, then put a bunk bed for the kids underneath.  Beds take up a lot of floor real estate in a 450 sq foot house, and we don't have anywhere to put Lituya when we eventually move her out of our bed.  Who knows when it'll happen though - neither of us is good at construction or has a lot of extra time.

Mal - that sucks about your dad!  I hope he's kept on by the new company.

Bedtime - It was a long process for us getting K happily into his own bed.  First, I nightweaned him at around 15 months or so (when I was pregnant with L).  Then we did bedtime with me nursing him in bed for a minute or two, then turning my back to him, and having him cuddle between me and daddy.  Then we'd do the same thing, but I'd leave after a few minutes.  Then I'd nurse him in a chair and only daddy would cuddle him in bed, moving him into his own bed after he was asleep.  Then no one would cuddle him, but daddy would hold his hand as he fell asleep.  Then finally to now, where daddy tucks him in, reads a story, and walks away.  He probably got to that last step reliably at about 2.5 years old.

I don't know if I'll push it as early again - we're not having any more kids, so I don't need to make room in our bed, and don't have to deal with pregnancy nursing.  But it is really really nice to be where we are now.

AFM - It's so odd hearing about everyone's warm weather.  Alaska has had such a dramatic snow year this year. I woke up to another few inches this morning, and it's still hovering at around 5 feet on the ground (which I doubt we'll see until June this year).  But it's not been very cold, and the light is definitely back.

[mckittre]

Just because I need to vent somewhere...  What on earth do you do about a potty regression?  K was doing really great, perfect at school, pretty good at home.  Then he's been getting worse and worse over the last week or two.  He pooped in his pants 3 times today!  Earlier, in exasperation, I told him that if he peed or pooped in his pants, then he had to wear diapers again, and he would get to type on the computer if his pants were clean and dry (typing on the computer is his favorite activity in the universe).  The first time, he seemed upset and fought the diaper.  Then he pooped in his pants two more times anyway, and didn't seem to care when I stuffed him in a diaper.  I try not to be angry and disappointed, but even when I try TO be angry and disappointed, he doesn't care at all.  Just laughs.  Arrgh!  I'm pulling my hair out here (and I don't really actually want to put him back in diapers permanently).

[Everrgreen]

Erin - That is frustrating!  I'm really not sure I have advice for you..  The only time R has poo accidents are when he's sick.  And he's had a few phases of having pee accidents but I think those might be a bladder infection or just stress.  Is there any changes that could be causing him to stress or try and take control in this way?  I guess one way would be to really involve him in the clean up, get him to do as much of it as he can.  Maybe having to take all that time to clean himself up will be an incentive to just use the potty?  And definitely cleaning up should be done immediately, so you don't get to continue playing with wet pants.  

Cindy - Very cute bed!  And I do like the idea of the steps just because it's cute and gives extra storage.  I do not like the railing though, I would skip that.  I think it's safer to just leave the steps as is imo.  I need to make my own trip to ikea, I want to buy a cheap coffee table to nail R's train tracks into.

Kate and Courtney - I'm getting so excited for your new babies!!  I can't wait to see pics :)

Mal - I'm sorry to hear about your dad's troubles.  That really really is not fair.  I hope something works out for him.  

RE bedtime - I have had such a busy week and there is just no way to have a routine and a decent bedtime.  I don't think it's an option until my classes are over.  That's ok.  I don't have any intention of moving him into his own room.  He doesn't want to and there is only the two of us so it seems kind of silly to sleep in separate rooms for no real reason.  AND as for dropping naps, I asked R if there were kids in his class who didn't nap and he said there was and they went to the gym instead, I asked him if he would like to go to the gym instead but he said "No, I think I just like to nap" lol.  So much for that idea!

We are also having gorgeous weather!  We are breaking records, we've been having highs of 18oC and over the next week there are expected highs of 21oC!!  Crazy warm for this time of year!  I want to get the bike out this weekend!!

[starling&diesel]

Erin ... That must be very frustrating!  I'm not sure how I'd handle it were it me.  What about no pants or underwear at all?  Tell him that there aren't any diapers that fit and he'll have to stay home and be nakey until he can figure out the potty?  Unless there's something underlying it all, of course.  Stress, infection, illness, etc.  But then, you or someone else would have to stay home with him.  Gah.  Dunno.  I hope it's just a short phase and he gets past it soon!

Mal ... Thinking about your dad.  How stressful.  I hope everything turns out for the best!

Ever ... Cute that he still wants to nap!  It'll all work out.

How are our pregnant mamas doing?

[Vegan Princess]

New bed, nice bed tent. And M wants to sleep in my bed bc the "blankets are more comfy". LOL. Haven't pushed it yet. 

I had another u/s this morning. 11 weeks 1 day. Baby was moving all over! So neat to see! I haven't seen it doing that yet. I'm doing well. A wee bit of nausea here and there but nothing awful. 

Erin: No advice here. But my good friend is having the same issue with her little one. She doesn't know what to do at this point either. Her daughter will use the potty for the babysitter 2x/week but not for her mom. 

Everr: So cute that he still wants to nap! :-) 

Cindy

[Nillarilla]

Erin I had the issue with peeing when my ds went to kindergarten. He would pee his pants on a daily basis at school because he didn't want to go inside when playing or because he was too scared to use the bathroom with the door closed or because the lineup was too long after eating and before playing he would just go out instead of waiting in the lineup. I made a reward system that if he came home with dry and clean smelling pants then he got a rock (he fills a jar to earn rewards like movies, video game time, skating outings, lego, apps for the computer etc). If he was wet or smelled like pee I took a rock out. If he got to the end of the week with clean and dry pants every day that week he got 5 bonus rocks. It took a couple weeks but it worked. We also talked about why he was doing it, how it smelled bad to other people, what he could do to prevent it. I was getting so frustrated so this way I didn't have to get upset with him about it I just took the rock and he visually saw the jar getting emptier and when he succeeded he saw the jar getting fuller. I don't know if this will help but K seems to really get concepts so maybe this would give him a visual sense of his progress. I never went back to diapers with my kids when they had regressions because I thought this would make the regression worse because sitting in wet pants is more uncomfortable than a wet diaper that holds all the moisture away. Plus when my kids were having regressions they usually needed more of my attention and I didn't want them to get it by diaper changing and want to keep this activity. I probably did a heck of lot more laundry because of this stance though lol.

Cindy - Yay for the wiggly baby!

Mal - forgot to say it earlier. So sorry to hear about your Dad's situation. My FIL has gone through this a few years ago. Each time he changed jobs he took a pay cut. I know they are struggling to save for retirement. He's also having some health issues now so if it happened again I don't know if he could find another job. I hope the company keeps him on! 

[AKislandgirl]

Cindy: yeah for a wiggle baby! This makes me smile!

Erin: Girlfriend... I'm with you on this one. It is so beyond frustrating to me. F will have whole days of no accidents and then a day with 3-4 accidents in a row. I don't get it and don't know what to do either. I just say things like, "oh no, it looks like you haven't been listening to your body. It was trying to tell you to go pee in the potty." And often when I notice she has to go we have a race to the potty to see who can go first. She always wins, LOL! We did go back to diapers for a while just before M was born because she just gave up for a while but she is in undies night and day now. Our only problem is day time. I do try to have her clean herself up as much as possible.

M is perfecting the art of motor boating and wants to do it all the time! Through the story at the library story time, while nursing (what, you didn't think that was possible, she doesn't believe me), and my favorite for an hour at 3am. It's lovely. Good thing she's cute.

[Vegan Princess]

Well a miracle happened last night! Makenna slept in her own bed. And she said that she wanted to go to sleep like a big girl. She knows we can't lay with her in it. But we each offered to stay by her bed while she fell asleep. She kicked us both out! And went to bed all on her own! Of course she woke up at 2am and came to our bed. But holy moly. I absolutely do not expect this feat to be repeated anytime soon. LOL. But DH said that it's like no amount of coercing her would ever work to get her to do it - she had to decide on her own. DH was all sad actually. Especially since when he brought her up to get her ready for bed she said "thank you for building my bed daddy". "I love you daddy". Just really sounding like such a big girl too. 

Anyone doing anything for St Patrick's day? It's my husband's favorite day of the yr. He loves going drinking with his friends. He even bought himself a new shirt. LOL. I, of course, never get to participate. I'm sort of missing corned beef and cabbage today. Ack. Don't tell anyone. LOL. I had a nice morning out by myself trolling the bookstore and shopping for some easter stuff for M. Michael's has all their easter stuff 40% off already! I may take M out to dinner just to feel like we are doing something fun too while DH is gone. 

I took M to the pediatric orthopedic surgeon about her toe walking. He was pushing either serial casting - a series of non-removable walking casts on both feet changed evert 2 weeks for up to 12 weeks. But he said it only has a 50% success rate. Or surgery to legnthen her achilles tendon. And she would be in casts for 6 weeks after. Both options sounds horrid and made me want to cry!! I think I am opting for neither. I'll watch it over the next couple yrs (he said they do surgery before school). I toe walked and I am just fine! I think I saw a quack doctor. He said he could prescribe physical therapy, if I want. But he doesn't think it'll make a difference. So I'm trying to remind her to walk on flat feet. But she doesn't like to.

Nilla: I love the jar/rock idea. 

Cindy

[Thursday Girl]

Mal, that sucks about your Dad.

potty regression- all of my kids have done this, I won't put them back in diapers although sometimes I have really wanted to. I just remind them that they use the potty now and change them and remind them that I know they were having a fun time, but if they had just stopped to go potty it woul dhave been really quick but having to change their clothes and clean them off takes a lot longer and they miss more of their fun stuff.

Cindy- so neat about the wiggly baby!! and awesome about the bed! I took all my kids topick out new sheets when they moved to their own bed and made it a big deal. That didn't work for Junes but it did work for the other 2. Not sure about toe walking, when I was a kid my sister had a friend that toe walked, she was13-14 years old. I do know that only wearing high heels can shorten your calf muscle, but everything I have is random bits of knowledge.

Sue- motorboating made me LOL, only b/c I have only heard it used when a guy is doing it to a girls boobs, I had to realign my brain.

Baby- she's coming along, I still haven't been able to picture what it will be like with a new baby, which has me a bit freaked out and scared something will happen to her.

St.Patrick's day.  Josie had a friend sleep over so in the morning we had green pancakes, and then we went to the river of green festival which was too hot and didn't really have that much to offer.  Then swimming at my sisters and home for corned beef and cabbage with horseradish sauce.

Something you have to try- nerds Jellybeans with a crunchy bumpy outer shell, so insanely good.

and here's a picture, you can see my belly but really I am posting it b/c it isn't often I see a picture of myself and think "wow, I look so pretty in that picture"

[AKislandgirl]

You do look gorgeous in that picture Mama! 

Funny about the motor boating! :0

Cindy: That sounds really extreme! My niece was a toe walker and they gave her stretches to do as well as said swimming is really good for her. She's on the swim team. She still has to be reminded sometimes but it has really helped. I'm with you and skipping either option!! I'd get another opinion on that for sure. Yikes!

We've decided to pull F out of dance class. They are on spring break this week so no class. The difference in our Saturdays is so striking that the decision is pretty clear. Hard to believe one 45 minute class can effect her so much but there you have it.

[mckittre]

Nilla - that rock-in-jar idea is a good one.  I think I'll try it with him.  Negative consequences don't seem to phase him, but maybe the positive reinforcement of seeing the jar fill up and being able to spend those for fun things will help.

Sue - Hope your weekends go more smoothly w/o the class.  There will be time for that sort of thing when she's older.  Funny how different the kids are, though.  I'm wishing it wasn't spring break this week, because I think K is better behaved when he goes to head start in the morning!  Though I feel kind of bad for thinking that (and for the fact he does better without me).

Cindy - wow, that does sound like an extreme remedy.  I would see if there's a gentler option!

Courtney - Cute pic.  With 3 kids, I bet I'd be too busy to spend much time imagining what it'll be like with the new one. I'm sure it doesn't mean anything bad.

AFM:  What defines "screen time" for you guys?  K's absolutely favorite activity in the whole wide world these days is to type on the computer.  Not on a game, not on the internet, just typing into a blank word document.  My husband says it doesn't count as screen time because there's nothing passive, nothing bright or flashy, no addictive reward structure, etc...  I guess I kind of agree, but I'm not sure.  He doesn't do it all day long, but he does do it a lot (unless we're withholding it as a reward for clean pants).

Went to a saurkraut/kimchee making class my friend was doing this afternoon.  Fun. 

And would anyone who feels like they missed out on winter this year like to have some of my 6 feet of snow?  Free for the taking!  I would like spring before July!

[Thursday Girl]

my kids would sure like some snow Erin!

okay I feel a little better about the not being able to imagine the baby after she is born and my blog will explain why.  I tried to explain it to my husband, at first he started to listen but he was trying to watch a movie, but part way through he got exasperated and said it was horrible for me to say something like that and then I got mad and I yelled, "why, I should just think it in my head and not have anyone to talk to about it?"  and then I told him not to complain about me being on the computer and "talking to women I have never met before" b/c at least THEY listen. Anyway, here it is.

[Everrgreen]

Courtney - *hugs* I think worry just comes with the job.  When I was pregnant with R I was so sure he was a she.  I didn't really have a huge preference either way, I just thought we would have a girl first.  Even after the ultrasound showing it was a boy I still would often catch myself thinking 'she' in my mind.  And I'm not sure I really pictured what actually having the baby in my arms would be like (although I was a first time mom, so it was all a brand new experience).  And I also worried about all the what ifs..  It's scary when you love something so much but can't control what happens.  Actually I still have moments of panic when R isn't with me and I think, 'what if...'  I think the worry is completely normal and not at all a sign that you 'should' be worrying.  *hugs*

And you do look awesome in the pic!  

Cindy - Yikes, I would definitely be getting a second opinion!  I'm sure it's not that serious (at least at this point anyway! She's only 3!)  And that's awesome you're making progress on sleeping alone!

Sue - Sounds like the dance class just isn't F's thing.  Not every personality is up for something so social and busy :)

Erin - Well, R doesn't play on the computer ever.. So screen time is just watching shows/movies.  I wouldn't be as opposed to playing on the computer (especially what K is doing), but I still think I would limit it a bit.  I like him to be actively playing (which he also is doing all day at daycare, so I try not to be too strict)

Our St. Patty's day was pretty uneventful.  I had heard that my city has a big parade, BUT turns out it was last Sunday, not actually on St. Patty's day.  So we missed it.  But I took R and my cousin's 3 year old 'J' to the zoo and then J stayed for a sleepover.  The boys have been having a blast together.  One issue I have though, J is sort of delayed a bit.  He doesn't speak well and he's very very very easygoing (bedtime for him = tell him it's time for bed, he goes and gets in bed and goes to sleep without a peep, which is great, but also seems very unusual for a 3 year old).  He also doesn't put up a fight against R ever.. And R totally takes advantage to the point where he just a total bully.  I feel so awful about it.  Obviously I intervene and try and discipline R but he just does it again the next chance he gets.  It's also hard for me because I can't really understand much of what he says, so I'm left guessing until I get it right and he nods.  Everyone in the family is trying to get him to really say words clearly and put words into sentences but it's difficult.  He is supposed to start JK  in September (he turns 4 in October, so he's in the year before R) but I feel like he's really going to struggle.  I don't think R is an exceptionally mean kid, but kids tend to pick on those who are different, and that's what R does.  I have a nephew on my ex's side who had some speech delays (not as significant as J's) and even he had such a hard time in jk.  They ended up switching him to a private school with only 8 kids per class for a few years until his language caught up (now he's back in public school and doing fine).  Anyway, I guess I'm just venting a bit.. I feel bad for J and want to help him and also I feel awful that my sweet boy is being such a bully :(