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How much responsibility over the home do you have? - Page 3

post #41 of 44

I am in the same boat as tiqa ! I bf at 6 am , then get up , let the dogs out , make breakfast , get my handicapped son ready for school , make sure the other 3 are awake and get dressed as well , eat breakfast , have their school bags ready , get out of the door on time , then get my 2-year-old out of bed , change her diaper , feed her , feed myself , do the first load of laundry , empty and fill the dishwasher , play with her , then get my baby , who usually wakes up by about 10 am , change her , dress her , feed her porridge , go shopping , if we need to . If not , we play , or I let them play by themselves , put laundry in the dryer , put more laundry in the washing machine , sort dry clothes and bring them in the older kids´rooms , so they can put them away , when they come home , make lunch for the babies , eat , put them down for their nap , feed the dog , pick up dog poop from the yard , clean up , receive the first kids coming home from school , feed them , supervise homework , get the little ones up , change more diapers , start cooking dinner , feed little ones , feed my oldest son , wash and change him , play with the kids , empty the dishwasher , fill the dishwasher , put more clothes away , 3 times a week give my oldest son a bath , give babies a bath , get the 2-year-old ready for bed and tuck her in , get my oldest son ready for bed , give baby her night bottle and put her in her crib , spend some quality time with the older kids , make sure they have their shower and brush their teeth , make sure they have all their school stuff ready for the morning , clean the last messes of the day , get on the computer to pay the bills , check e-mails , and so on , make sure everybody is asleep and all the doors are locked , go to bed ( hopefully ) before midnight , feed the baby about 1 - 2 times per night ..

Oh , yes I have a bf , he doesn´t get up until about 10 - 11 am , complains , that I am making noise , when he is trying to sleep , makes his coffee , sits on the computer and complains , that he can´t even enjoy his coffee in peace , when I ask him , if he can at least bring the occasional laundry basket upstairs ,  takes a little nap in the afternoon , while the little kids are sleeping , complains , if I make too much noise , when doing something while they are asleep , sits down for dinner , that he didn´t help with , to a set table , that he didn´t help with , watches movies or goes back on the computer , while I clean up and chase after the little ones some more , then when we go to bed , by which time I am sometimes so exhausted , I want to cry , he complains , that we don´t have sex , since it´s not like I have done anything to make me tired all day , the least I could do , is give him a blow job ,( I am quoting him here ) to make him feel better with all the stress the kids give him     

post #42 of 44
I do 99% of everything here too. Dh will pick up something needed on the way home from work and take out the garbage although I still do that sometimes. He's responsible for any repairs ... home, vehicle, or toys or whatever. He also does all vehicle maintenance but everything else is mine. He does grill on occasion. I'm sure he might help with other random things if I ask but I don't since he works seven days a week. It's only when he has a work schedule change and I have to work too that it really bothers me.
post #43 of 44

I do all the cooking, cleaning, and laundry. I pay most of the bills and keep track of the budget. I do 99% of the grocery shopping. In return, DH works hard at his job, takes overtime, and on Saturday, lets me sleep in and takes over toddler duty. :) That is a huge pay off for me. That one day to sleep in makes me feel normal. :)

I felt overwhelmed until I found a system. It's not crazy, but it helps. Change bed sheets on Tuesdays, wash all sheets and towels on Wed. Doing "quick pickups" of the living room and kitchen during naps and after I put my son down to bed. Cleaning the bathroom while my son is in the bath playing. Little things that help keep my mind (and house) in order. :)
 

post #44 of 44

DH and I have very clear cut strengths and weaknesses. The running joke (that's often held as a sort of guideline) is that I'm the brains and he's the brawn. The kids are old enough and were in a single parent family for so long that they handle a lot of the responsibilities, too. So, our breakdown looks something like;

 

 

Cooking: 

50% Me - 10% DH - 40% Kids

 

Cleaning: 

20% Me - 30% DH - 50% Kids 

 

Laundry:

60% Me - 10% DH - 30% Kids

 

Pet Care:

10% Me - 20% DH - 70% Kids

 

Bills/Finances:

80% Me - 15% DH - 5% Kids (yes, they are involved in family budgeting decisions)

 

Meal Plans, Grocery Lists, Keeping Track of Everyone's Medical Food Needs:

80% Me - 15% DH - 5% Kids

 

Remembering Bdays/Holidays, Buying/Making/Sending Presents:

80% Me - 5% DH - 15% Kids

 

Making/Attending Appointments:

80% Me - 20% DH - 0% Kids

 

Homeschooling/Lesson Plans/Paperwork/Field Trips/ect:

80% Me - 10% DH - 10% Kids 

 

Income: 

50% Me - 50% DH (ds has a job, but mostly spends it on entertainment items or presents for friends/family. I have been investing every spare penny for years, and don't work now but continue to invest every spare penny dh brings home. My investments are bringing in as much as dh's very low summer income. When the weather cools down though, he will be making about double what he is now, so the break down will by different until next summer.)

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