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Mothering › Groups › November 2012 Due Date Club › Discussions › Good-bye and good luck...

Good-bye and good luck...

post #1 of 12
Thread Starter 

Just wanted to say it was lovely to have met you all and I wish you the best with your pregnancies, but sadly after three days of light spotting I decided to take a pregnancy test to reassure myself and it came up negative.  As did the second test :(  I've never had a miscarriage before and am taken aback by how attached I was even after a few short weeks of pregnancy.  If, God forbid, any of you find yourself in my boat please feel free to message me.  I'll be hoping that none of you have to.  And if, by chance you've been here before and have any insight on just exactly what it is I'm supposed to do now (do I need a d/c at this early stage?  any herbs I should take, etc?) please hook me up with some info. Take care of yourselves and your little beans!  blowkiss.gif  ~Amanda

post #2 of 12

((big HUGS)) I'm so very sorry.  I have been there, one at 5 weeks, another at 7.  It was heartbreaking, devastating.  I was taken aback too.  I still cry often about it. Please feel free to message me, or take part of the pregnancy loss threads.  There's so many things, feelings that are hard to say out loud, but there, there is safety. 

I'm so so sorry.  guilty.gif

post #3 of 12

I'm so sorry. Of course you were attached..I think any woman who finds out she's pregnant develops that connection with the "idea" of her baby, You make plans, you dream. No matter if the miscarriage is in the beginning or happens later, a loss is a loss, and the grief is real and valid. I wish you lots of support, love, and healing.

post #4 of 12

I am so sorry for your loss!  I have had 2 miscarriages, 1 pretty much as soon as I found out I was pregnant, and 1 at 8.5 weeks.  Both were very hard for me.  The "pregnancy and loss" boards here were very helpful to me. 


I'm not sure how many weeks you were, but I would imagine that you would be fine without any sort of doctor's care.  I can almost guarantee you will not need a d&c. 


I am really sorry you are going through this.  Sending you love!

post #5 of 12

I'm so sorry. :-(


I, too have had miscarriages. My first was just shy of 6 weeks, and it was my first pregnancy. I remember very clearly what the midwife said to me. She said it's okay to mourn the baby just like any other family member, and to not let anyone tell me that I shouldn't be grieving.


I don't think you'll need a D&C this early. My second miscarriage was at almost 8 weeks, and I didn't need one for that either. Just be very careful for the next few days and if you start to develop a fever or anything feels 'off', be sure to see a doctor. Even with my uncomplicated early miscarriages, my doctors wanted to see me for follow-up visits (one was for an ultrasound) to be sure everything was fine.


Take it easy, and again I'm so, so sorry. :-(

post #6 of 12

I am so so sorry for your loss.  I as well do not think you will need a D&C.  Just be mindful of any fever or dizziness and try to be gentle with yourself.  When you are up to it, you should visit the loss forums on here.  I found the ladies to be very supportive and understanding, and it helped me through a dark time.


Hugs to you and I hope you are able to heal quickly.

post #7 of 12

I'm very sorry for your loss. Take good care of yourself.

post #8 of 12

I am so sorry for your loss.  candle.gif



post #9 of 12
Thread Starter 

Thank you all.  I am very blessed to have really wonderful mama friends and child-free friends alike who have been very supportive and helpful to me today.  I just felt like it was important to say 'good-bye' to this forum and to let you know what happened to me.  I would feel strange just 'disappearing'.  This wasn't the journey or the lesson I was expecting to learn, but I will embrace it just the same.  I'm sure letting go will be a process.  Totally shocked at how many 'triggers' I've seen today, from Jessica Simpson's pregnant cover to articles trending about babies.  I was one of you yesterday and today it feels like it was all a dream.  I envy all of you, with your morning sickness and your odd cravings.  This glass of wine I'm suddenly allowed to have is a weak comfort.  However... I do have the luscious fat rolls of my son's baby brother (same dad, different mom) right across the street from me for the next month or so (she's housesitting), so I'll take solace in the grinning, dimpled face of someone else's baby until I'm ready to try and make my own again...  Thanks again, and good luck! 

post #10 of 12

grouphug.gif Hugs Mama. Take solace in a warm, loving embrace. I hope you are able to find peace soon and your womb is filled when you are ready. 

post #11 of 12

I'm so very sorry for your loss.

post #12 of 12

Take it one day and a time and trust that your body is wise.  This is our second and we lost our first at around 8 weeks.  A shock and so I am treading lightly now and being more conservative in my sharing news until we successfully reach the end of the first trimester.  I am sure your flicker will be back when it is ready;)  In the mean time, take moving breaths and know that you are loved!


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