I sure do. I say I gave birth. I don't see why not. I also have not had as many struggles over this or any other emotional aspects of my c-sections as other women, so that is probably why.
on yahoo and one lady was throwing a *bleep* fit at how some women who have had c sections will say that they "gave birth". She was really irate because she doesn't think that c section mamas have the right to say that they "gave birth" because they didn't physically push the baby out of their vaginas.
OMG. Seriously? I went into labor at 24 weeks, with twins, when I was 23 years old. On a weekend, at night. Not a soul I knew was around. Dad was out of state because we thought there was no chance I'd have the babies then, so it was fine for him to be gone. In fact, it was so early in the pregnancy that for several hours I thought I was just having some back pain and didn't make the connection that contractions can feel like that. I hadn't even read all the sections of my natural pregnancy books, on the actual birth part, yet. I thought I still had plenty of time. Later, I was fascinated to realize that many of the odd positions I instinctively tried, to relieve my "back pain" are commonly recommended by midwives, during labor. But I was completely alone and had never discussed these with anyone.
Eventually, some hospital resident decided I needed a C-section to expel 2-pound fetuses, even though I was almost fully dilated and uncomfortable, but not in terrible pain. Was that an idiotic decision on her part? Perhaps. Was I in a state to argue with her about it? What do you think? I thought my babies were going to die. I wanted to do anything a professional said might keep that from happening. I was crying and wishing my Mom were there. I remember asking one of the seemingly dozens of strangers suddenly standing over me - a doctor, I think - if he'd just hold my hand for a minute. He did and, by then, I was strapped down, injected with something, I felt something cold moving up a vein in my arm and everything went black. I woke up in convulsions, shouting for no one to talk to me about the babies yet, because I was sure they'd tell me they were dead and I just wasn't ready to believe that.
They weren't. For four months, I sat beside them every day in the NICU, pumped milk until only blood would come out because they were never able to nurse and listened to some awful neonatologist with no compassion tell me there was almost no chance they'd make it and if they did, they'd be vegetables. I watched people stick tubes in their lungs. I sat through the entire 4-hour window when a doctor assured me one twin would die from kidney failure, then witnessed him pee into the air, which a veteran nurse told me was nothing short of a miracle.
I brought them home, 4 months old, weighing only 6 pounds, on oxygen, apnea monitors and round-the-clock regimens of breathing treatments and medications that left me so sleep-deprived I would get them both to sleep, then walk into the next room to pick up the "third" twin I thought I heard crying. I was told not to live more than a few miles from the hospital, since they'd almost certainly be re-hospitalized at least once, the first year they were home. If they lived. I was told they might never walk, or talk and would surely have severe asthma.
Tonight, I watched them run in their first high-school-level track meet. And they didn't come in last, that's for sure!
To your Yahoo woman: Birth stories are women's war stories, but better. We didn't endure and persevere and kill something. We endured and persevered and gave something life. I won't belittle your comparatively benign war story - pushing something out of your vagina - if you won't presume to belittle my war story, by saying I didn't "give birth" to anyone.
This is the best thing I will read all day. I LOVE this!
Jeannine, you are my hero.
I wouldnt throw a fit about it, if a c-section mama chooses to say she gave birth,then power to her
I dont say i gave birth, i say he was born, i dont feel i gave birth, I laboured, but i didnt birth him, the doctor with the scalpel did
This is how I feel about my first son's birth. I'm not upset or bitter or whatever about it. The section was necessary and it is what it is. I am very thankful to have had the chance to birth my second son.
I pushed for five hours with my first ("natural"), and ended up with a forceps and a post partum hemorrhage.
I pushed for 5 hours with my second and ended up with a C. Section (10'9")
Did I give birth---YOU BETCHA!!!
VBAC for #3
This women who is so angry at women who have a C. Secton needs to get a grip!!!
C. Section is usually the sad end to a miserable labor---you paid your dues and have every right to say you gave birth!!!
A repeat C. Section also has that right!
yes, of course i say i gave birth. my first caesarean birth was because, after 2+ days of induction for preeclampsia and 3 hours of pushing, i hemorrhaged and both of us were in immediate danger. most people who are pro-natural-birth nod and agree that i did my best, and i did what was necessary, and i gave birth. my second was a c/s for pre-e, as well. i assure you, despite needing an alternate exit, i very much participated in the birth as much as i could given the circumstances i was presented with.
i had my doulas nearby, who helped me prepare for the births. i used mental imagery to help bring forth a positive experience for us. i sent my babies my love with every fibre of my being. i felt everything i could feel. i listened to the sounds, talked to my babies and knew they could hear me and know they were loved. i encouraged them to breathe, thanked them for their first cries, touched them as soon as i could, brought them to my breasts as soon as i could, smelled them, kissed them, and loved them.
sounds like a birth to me.
Birth stories are women's war stories, but better. We didn't endure and persevere and kill something. We endured and persevered and gave something life.
Speak for yourself. Not every birth story ends with life.
No. I didn't give birth - not even once. I wasn't involved in my c-sections in any way, except for getting on the table. My chldren's births (of course they were born...although I don't feel that I was, either, so...I'm not always consistent, I guess) were the most appallingly passive experiences of my life.
However, I have absolutely no desire to define the birth experience of anyone else. Not everyone has the same vaginal birth story, and not everyone has the same c-section story, either.
"Birth stories are women's war stories, but better. We didn't endure and persevere and kill something. We endured and persevered and gave something life. I won't belittle your comparatively benign war story - pushing something out of your vagina - if you won't presume to belittle my war story, by saying I didn't "give birth" to anyone."
WORD. After I had my child I spent months staring at peoples heads surreptitiously in amazement thinking of how they get squeezed out. Well okay adult heads are bigger but still, haha. But not even just birth, the whole nine months or so of pregnancy, all the aches and pains and throwing up. Every person brought into the world has a mother who had to go through nearly a year of bearing them and at least some degree of pain and trouble getting them out into it. I can't stand that this gets dismissed.
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