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I need a parenting tool - help!

post #1 of 4
Thread Starter 

My DS is 3 and gets into this crazy hyper moods where he is out of control and I can't get him to listen/stop/anything.  He will usually be running around, screaming, laughing, will run up and hit me and continue laughing, will hurt the cat and continue laughing.  NOTHING I say stops him.  I end up getting frustrated and grabbing him and spanking him bag.gif.  I always feel bad about it and will apologize to him after a few minutes (when I've taken some deep breaths and calmed down).  But I just reach this point where I am so desperate and NOTHING is working.  And spanking actually does work.. It snaps him back to reality where he will actually listen to me and stop what he's doing.  Although at first he just starts to cry and will say something like "you hit me!  It's not nice to hit!"  And of course he's right and I know that but I just literally do not know what else to do to snap him out of these crazy moods. He will not stop laughing and continuing to be totally insane no matter what I do.

I should mention that sometimes bribery will work to snap him out of it - a treat or getting to watch a show.  But we don't always have time, often we're getting ready to leave for daycare or getting ready to go to bed.  


So to sum up, none of these work:  explaining/rationalizing, yelling, physically restraining him, time outs (he won't stay.. and physically holding him in one spot doesn't work)

These work:  spanking, bribery


There's got to be another way!!  Help!!

post #2 of 4

Well, our ds's are the same age. All I can really offer is sympathy. Although, we get dressed right after waking up (before he's awake enough to protest, right after some wake up hugs and kisses), so that getting out the door can be as simple as just walking outside (I sometimes save shoes for once we leave the apartment - makes it a tad easier occasionally).


I also don't wake him up until 30minutes before we leave in the morning. I shower and get dressed first, and then wake him up and do potty, clothes, a small breakfast (he gets a real breakfast at school), and then shoes and out we go.


Like I said, mostly sympathy.

post #3 of 4
Thread Starter 

Thanks SSM, sympathy is good too :)  I have had a crazy busy week so I feel like I haven't even seen him!  And therefore haven't screwed up with the parenting..  We've actually had a few good mornings.  I'm trying to be more sensitive to how hard it is for him to get up (he is NOT a morning person).  He sits on my lap while we both eat breakfast, which seems to help him be more agreeable with the next steps of getting ready.  Bedtime is a work in progress..  And I've just been too busy to work on it.  And he's been hanging out with another 3 year old most evenings so that is tiring him out more!  

post #4 of 4

Sometimes I just put some music on to dance when my kids are out of control.

To go with their energy. We then dance. Then they level with me and laugh and I can turn off the music and they changed their focus. It can also help to do something slowly on your own to reflect another pace then him. I just walk "away" and fx. walk out to the bathroom and brush mu teeth but myself, then they come out slowly and I can talk to them.

Other times I freak out like you. What about some kind of instrument to get throug, a drum or triangel instead of spanking .

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