ithappened, it sounds to me like you're doing exactly the right thing. Keep an eye on things and then evaluate when it gets closer. I think it's important to have an idea of the kind of birth you want, but I also think it's crazy to be so tied to that one particular experience that you can't adapt when things go differently. With twins especially it seems like the best course is to play it by ear, hope for the best, but be prepared for a c-section. Your first birth sounds crazy, so that would be another important variable for me, at least.
Homebirthing Mamas - Page 2
Lilytiger I agree. My first birth went pretty fast- I think from first contraction to delivery was under 5 or 6 hours. He was also almost 10lbs. His head circumference was off the charts- its sort of a miracle I didnt have any tearing but everything else was horrible for me. I also had bad PPD after birth which I am sure only complicated matters.
I am going to play it by ear and hope for the best.
Do you do a lot of Kegels? You could try an intense "regimen" of Kegels daily for the rest of the pregnancy to boost pelvic floor strength. Also, are you familiar with Bradley Birth? They have a lot of exercises you can do to strengthen the pelvic floor. They're pretty basic, but they can help, too. I really hope things turn out just right for your birth... What would they do if you were there and in labor and just flat-out refused a c-sec? Can they turn you out if you're actively in labor and about to give birth?
What does "UC" mean?
I'm going to give birth at a birth center nearby. I really wanted to do a homebirth (my mom gave birth to me at home, so I feel very connected to it), but my husband was really nervous. So we found a birth center that is the perfect compromise! The birthing room is set up just like a bedroom, plus they have a huge tub (I really want to labor in water, if not do the whole thing in there). They also have stools, swings, etc - all sorts of contraptions to help out with labor. So we get all the benefits of a home birth in terms of surroundings, midwives, etc, but it's outside of our actual apartment so my husband feels more secure.
It's way out of our budget, and we have Kaiser coverage which won't pay for ANYthing. So we traded our wedding reception for the birth center! We just got married in December, and our plan was to do a small family-only ceremony with a small dinner reception, and then have a big reception/party on our 6-month anniversary this June. My parents were going to pay for it. So we asked them if they would mind paying for the birth center instead of us throwing a big party this summer. Now we just have to alert our extended family and friends that there isn't going to be a summer reception...because there's going to be a summer baby instead!
I actually wouldn't refuse if there was good reason for one. If Im actively in labor I would do everything I could to delivery normally but I also am not in a 'do or die' sort of mindset with this birth about being 100% natural..
It's way out of our budget, and we have Kaiser coverage which won't pay for ANYthing. So we traded our wedding reception for the birth center! We just got married in December, and our plan was to do a small family-only ceremony with a small dinner reception, and then have a big reception/party on our 6-month anniversary this June.
Thats such a good idea! I wish we could do something like that. The birth center I used before I LOVED but we can't afford it.. its like 12,000 for the birth regardless length of stay after (but you can stay up to a week).
You can stay a week?! That sounds amazing!
That makes sense. I don't think I said that clearly at all. I guess around here, they have a very old-school mentality. Like several hospitals still don't allow VBACs (smaller, country hospitals). So, if they strong-arm, can you refuse? I guess I'm super skeptical because I've heard so many stories of OBs agreeing to something and then changing in the delivery room and having "their way or the highway." Obviously if there's a strong medical reason, I wouldn't object either, that's just not the right approach.
We're planning to stay home again. My first birth was a hospital nightmare because I didn't know any better- my second was a planned UC but I ended up transferring. Turns out everything was fine, it was just taking a long time and I didn't know what to do. So we're going to try to have a midwife there this time if we can afford it. Our share would be about $1000. I'll do pretty much anything to avoid being in the hospital again. I am still haunted by things that happened there.
Intime0- is that book about healing after a traumatic birth?
Something, yes, it is. It's a really beautiful book. Not Henci though, but is Birthing from Within.
Henci writes a Thinking Woman's Guide. Another good book.
Penny, amazing that your parents are paying for that. How silly that insurance wont. ARGH. When are they going to get on teh same page?
We go UC meaning, we take full responsibility for our care and pregnancy and birth. We've had a transfer. But other than that, they've gone really smoothly. We read and read and read. I've probably read 60 books on birth. I have to honestly say, I know as much as some OB's...probably more. I dont mean that in a I'm so smart kind of way. I mean that in a I care more about my health than the OB does kind of way. I read the latest studies, etc etc. OB's seem to get stuck in the dont want to get a lawsuit so I better do this by the book mentality. And the csection rate is sky high. I say all this to further explain that UC is not a head in the sand mentality. I've found in the UC community that most people are very educated about birth. you would have to be, really.
anyway, you can see I'm passionate about my choices. LOL. BUT I don't mind yours being different and I support you 100%. My way isnt the only right way.
We are planning a homebirth as well! This is my first pregnancy, so I'm a wee bit nervous, but feel that I'll do my best at laboring if I'm in a comfortable environment rather than a hospital (for me, hospitals freak me out and are a source of stress. I also don't have a doctor that I trust or feel comfortable with, but I loooove my midwife!). We live 2 blocks from the hospital, too. I am trying not to get too attached to the idea of homebirth, though, because I know that, especially for first time moms, a transfer is a possibility. In FL, where I live, you only have 24 hrs to give birth after your water breaks before the midwife has to transfer you, and I've had that happen to several of my friends.
We're planning a homebirth as well! I've always imagined myself birthing at home so it wasn't a hard decision at all. We love our midwife here in Chicago and have really valued the personal care we have received thus far in the pregnancy. The only hiccup we may have is that we are attempting to move back to Oregon after I finish my Masters program in June (if DH can find a job) and we will have to find a midwife willing to take us at 35+ weeks. Eek. I'm sure it will work out in the end...
I am thrilled to experience my first homebirth!!! My first birth (26 hours) was in the hospital- natural, vaginal, and thank the universe my mother made it there in time! My second (32 hours) was induced at 42 weeks. At 30 hours I took the epidural as I was completely exhausted after being awake for like 45+ hours. I rested for 2 hours and birthed vaginally. After experiencing two completely different births, I'm more than ready for this homebirth!
I have a TON of midwife friends in Oregon as well as friends who have homebirthed there.. Id be happy to put you in touch with them.. some of them are on their 3 or 4th homebirths!
Planning a homebirth (again!) but there's a decent possibility we'll be moving in a few months, and I'm not sure where yet :) so I'm not sure if I should book the midwives and pay them or go to the local hospital midwife group (covered by insurance) until I know what's going on more. I hated the hospital group last time, so I'm not sure I should put myself through it. I seem to be very bad about early prenatal care, honestly.