Swim party question

[HappyHappyMommy]

Hi Mamas,

If your child (elementary school aged) was invited to an indoor pool birthday party where swim caps were required by the facility would you expect to bring a cap for your child or would you expect the host of the party/birthday family to provide caps?

Thanks!

[ollyoxenfree]

Well, I wouldn't expect the host to provide swimsuits for the kids, so I wouldn't expect them to provide caps either. 

If you are the host, I'd probably make sure to put the requirement for a cap on the invitation, somewhere so it's prominent. I'd also follow up with parents and emphasize it. Then, if you can afford it, I'd buy or borrow a few extra caps for anyone who can't provide their own or just simply forgets. Chances are there will be at least one or two.  

[Super~Single~Mama]

I lived in a city where caps were required at our local pool, so I would already have one for my kid. Put it on the invitation though so parents know.

[Peony]

I'd just put it on the invitation. I wouldn't expect the host to provide one.

[Linda on the move]

My kids are competitive swimmers, so caps are no big deal here.

Are you the one giving the party?  Are you wanting to do caps for all the kids? Because there are places you can order than do printing on them and could do something fun and have it be the give away item for the party -- but let the parents know ahead of time so no body goes out and buys a new cap if they don't need it.

OR just put a note on the card that the pool requires caps.

If you are a guest and the cap thing is a big deal to you, you might just ask the host if have an extra. We have a little stack of them. Those thing reproduce on their own once you two.

[Everrgreen]

You should definitely mention it on the invite.  I wouldn't know to send one with my son but would have no problem getting him one if needed.

[crunchy_mommy]

I voted no & I would turn down the invite because I wouldn't want to buy one... but that's really because nowhere here requires a cap and I don't even know where you'd get one or how much it cost. If it's only a dollar or two I'd just mention on the invite that caps are required and you can purchase them at XYZ for $Y if you don't already have one. If they are more costly then I guess it depends on the financial situation of your guests' families... I do think providing them would be a nice gesture if the kids aren't likely to have them, but I wouldn't expect it.

[One_Girl]

I voted other. If my dd was good friends with the person inviting us I would probably buy a cap. Otherwise I would decline the invitation. A cap has no purpose for us at this point so it would be an incredibly wasteful purchase.

[lguse]

So sorry, I accidentally voted wrong. I selected that I would expect the host to provide caps, but I should have selected the first option.

 

[Youngfrankenstein]

Originally Posted by crunchy_mommy 

I voted no & I would turn down the invite because I wouldn't want to buy one... but that's really because nowhere here requires a cap and I don't even know where you'd get one or how much it cost. If it's only a dollar or two I'd just mention on the invite that caps are required and you can purchase them at XYZ for $Y if you don't already have one. If they are more costly then I guess it depends on the financial situation of your guests' families... I do think providing them would be a nice gesture if the kids aren't likely to have them, but I wouldn't expect it.

Yeah.  I know I could order it online but I really don't know where to go to just pick one up.  I suppose it's weird that I'd be expected to buy something to be able to attend a party.
 

[ollyoxenfree]

Originally Posted by Youngfrankenstein 

Yeah.  I know I could order it online but I really don't know where to go to just pick one up.  I suppose it's weird that I'd be expected to buy something to be able to attend a party.
 

Sporting goods stores. 

Department stores with sporting goods sections.

Walmart (I'm guessing here, I've never looked for swimming caps at Walmart, but they carry everything, don't they?).

As for weird, I dunno. We've been invited to pool parties and beach parties, where we needed to bring a swimsuit and towel, and skating parties where we needed to bring our own skates. If we didn't swim or skate, I suppose we'd have to buy gear to attend.  

[crunchy_mommy]

Originally Posted by ollyoxenfree 

Sporting goods stores. 

Department stores with sporting goods sections.

Walmart (I'm guessing here, I've never looked for swimming caps at Walmart, but they carry everything, don't they?).

As for weird, I dunno. We've been invited to pool parties and beach parties, where we needed to bring a swimsuit and towel, and skating parties where we needed to bring our own skates. If we didn't swim or skate, I suppose we'd have to buy gear to attend.  

But don't most skating rinks have rental skates too? And I think most people have bathing suits & towels. I don't think most people have swim caps (unless you live in an area where this is more common, maybe?)

[ameliabedelia]

I would expect the host to provide any equipment needed that is not something that most people commonly own.   I guess what *most people commonly own* depends on the area.

I don't consider swimming caps for children to be something that most people commonly own, as I think of it as something that only competitive swimmers use.  I

Swimsuits are obviously different, I consider that to be something that is pretty universally owned by just about everyone (at least kids, anyway).

I think something like skates would depend a lot on the area, but if the party is at an arena where skates can be rented, I would expect the host to rent skates for any child that didn't own them.  

[pianojazzgirl]

I said that I'd definitely bring one.

I think the thing here is that I live in a city where most pools require a swimming cap.  It would not be weird for me to learn that a cap would be required at a swimming party.  It's also easy to find one (any drugstore), and most people probably already own one.

Where I grew up we never had to wear caps, so it would be much more of an inconvenience to find and purchase one just for my kid to go to one party.  In that case I might a) phone the host and ask where I could buy one (if i thought i could afford it), b) phone the host and ask if they had an extra we could borrow, or c) decline the invitation.

I assume that it's most likely that if you are getting an invitation to a swimming party where swimming caps are mandatory you probably live somewhere where caps are common, in which case you very likely might already have one, or at least be able to buy one readily (and might want one for future use anyway).  ETA - therefore if I was hosting a party in such a city I'd simply add a little note on the invite not to forget a swimming cap and leave it at that (no need to provide caps for all the kids, though certainly having a couple of extras might come in handy).

[hazelmama]

I voted other.  My DD has never worn a swim cap before so besides having to find one and the issue of price for something we would probably never use again, I'm not sure she would be willing to actually wear it when we got to the party.  We might end up declining for that reason.

[ollyoxenfree]

Originally Posted by crunchy_mommy 


But don't most skating rinks have rental skates too? And I think most people have bathing suits & towels. I don't think most people have swim caps (unless you live in an area where this is more common, maybe?)

Actually, no, the city-run rinks and arenas around here don't offer skate rentals. There are also a fair number of outdoor skating venues and lots of people will skate on frozen ponds. We've gone to many skating parties, but never expected the hosts to provide skates. 

Swim caps cost about $5. I suppose that some people feel it would be an imposition to have to get one for a party. Also, maybe even that small cost is tough for some families. Saying it's weird to be asked to bring one seems a little strong to me. I think a swim cap is getting close to the kind of personal gear that I wouldn't expect someone else to provide for me or my kids - like a jock strap. If the choice is between buying our own or borrowing someone else's, I would rather buy. 

[pianojazzgirl]

OP - I'm curious.  What's the story behind your poll?  Is it you that's hosting the swim party?

[crunchy_mommy]

Originally Posted by ollyoxenfree 

Actually, no, the city-run rinks and arenas around here don't offer skate rentals. There are also a fair number of outdoor skating venues and lots of people will skate on frozen ponds. We've gone to many skating parties, but never expected the hosts to provide skates.

Swim caps cost about $5. I suppose that some people feel it would be an imposition to have to get one for a party. Also, maybe even that small cost is tough for some families. Saying it's weird to be asked to bring one seems a little strong to me. I think a swim cap is getting close to the kind of personal gear that I wouldn't expect someone else to provide for me or my kids - like a jock strap. If the choice is between buying our own or borrowing someone else's, I would rather buy.

Ah, I was thinking of roller skating. I've never heard of an ice skating party.

This whole thing must really be regional. To me, a party where you bring your own swim cap would be like bringing your own single-person bouncy house to a party. It's just not something most people would have, though obviously a bouncy house would be a bit more expensive! To have to pay $5 for a swim cap that we'd never use again, plus buy a gift for the child, would not be in my budget & I'd decline the invite unless it was a super close friend.

Originally Posted by pianojazzgirl 

OP - I'm curious. What's the story behind your poll? Is it you that's hosting the swim party?

Me too!

[Parker'smommy]

If I was the host, I'd put it on the invite. If someone mentioned that it was a big deal, I'd buy one for them, I guess. As a guest, I'd probably just go out and buy a cheapy one for the party. No biggie. 

My son had a skateboard party at a really cool local skateboard park ( Sean White goes there on his time off from snowboarding!) this past month. The park doesn't rent any boards or gear and they require all riders to wear helmets and elbow and knee pads. The invite was made by the skate park and said that all of this was required and not provided by the park. All of the boys had a skateboard, except one, and I spoke to his mom and we borrowed one for him from a friend. He had a bike helmet, and his parents went out and bought him pads. A few boys had to go out and buy pads. Yes, it was an expense for some kids, but, they can ( and should ) use the pads again. There was no way I could afford to buy that all for his guests, I just couldn't. Heck, the party was expensive enough with a skate instructor for the 10 kids in our party for 3 hours. We wouldn't have been offended if someone didn't come to the party because they couldn't or wouldn't buy the gear, but, no one had a problem with it. 

[HappyHappyMommy]

Originally Posted by crunchy_mommy 

Originally Posted by pianojazzgirl 

OP - I'm curious. What's the story behind your poll? Is it you that's hosting the swim party?

Me too!

Hello! OP here. Thanks to all for your input and thoughts. My dear friend (who is almost like a sister to me) is hosting the swim party for her daughter and I offered to help her plan and organize it. One of the things I did to help was call several places with indoor pools; some required caps, while others did not.

The place that looked best (had a very nice pool, included in the party package swim leaders who would lead pool games for the kids as well as free swim time for kids, and was the most cost effective in terms of total cost/total number of kids) required caps. I didn't think much of it as I have swam as both an adult and a child at places that required caps (and others that didn't). When I mentioned the cap requirement to my friend, she was very concerned about how guests might respond, so I thought hearing from others would be helpful.

And it so has been! Thank you!

As for the decision...she decided to go with the place that required caps and we made up invitations that asked people to "bring a bathing suit, towel, and swimming cap" explaining that caps were required. I offered to get her a few extras to have on hand in case anyone forgot or told her they couldn't come because they didn't have a cap.(I want to help her out with the party, but can't help out with the logistics on the day of the party, so I thought getting a few caps in advance would be a little something I could do.)

...and then...

...it turned out that the facility might not have availability on the date my friend as planning for the party. And her daughter told her that she was feeling embarrassed and uncomfortable about the cap and asking her friends to bring/wear caps. (Her daughter hasn't ever worn a cap before.)

...so...

I checked back with our 2nd choice place (awesome pool, included in the party package swim leaders who would lead pool games for the kids as well as free swim time for kids, but more slightly more expensive overall and not as cost effective in terms of total cost/total number of kids) and they have an opening on the right day and do not require caps. So my friend decided to go with that place! 

As for me, I'm glad I could my friend find someplace that worked for both her and her daughter feel comfortable with and will enjoy. And as my friend and I discussed, it's nice to be able to get what you want (at least in some ways) for your birthday/party, so we are glad we could do that for her daughter in this way.