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Spring IVF Thread: Bring on the BFPs! - Page 25

post #481 of 547

Aura - well, honestly, I have kinda gotten the same nervous feeling from Fisch. When we spoke on the phone during my first consult, I assumed he had my records, since I had sent them. He was talking as if he knew my history in detail. Then a week later I found out they never received them! So he was explaining my protocol without even knowing what happened with the premature O'ing, canceled cycles, zero fertilization, etc. Then later I read on another board that people thought that they took a cookie-cutter approach -everyone the same. It has had me worried, that he didn't even know my history before giving me a detailed protocol (explained on the phone), or even knowing my last protocol. But, I have stuck with it because they seem to have such great results.

post #482 of 547

RCR - Ducks!! I love them!! I am sorry to hear about that phone call. I would be a little skeptical as well. Maybe you can do some background research?


Deport - I totally understand about the financial aspect. I am currently in Kuwait and the price for a cycle of IVF is not as bad as what I have resarched for stateside. My husband and I both agreed to do one cycle and pray for the best. I had around 27 eggs during that cycle, 2 were transferred and only 2 were able to be froze. We were not even 100% sure that we would go for the FET. When we spoke with our doc she gave us an extremely great price!! Thank God!! So, we decided to try again. I was a bit sad when I found out that of all those eggs only 2 survived. But even those 2 are a blessing. Hang in there and stay positive!!


Hope - I am sooo mega excited for you!!! Fantastic news!!!


I had my FET on Sunday the 13th. I will have my test on the 27th. I am 5 days post transfer and I am having slight cramping and my breast have been tender for about 2 days now. This cycle is completetly different from the first round. I have only taken endometrin and folic acid. I started it a week before the transfer up until now. I will not stop taking it until I test. Hopefully I get some awesome results and continue to have to take the endometrin. =) My body is not under as much stress as it was the first time around, especially since I had overstimulation. That was no fun.

post #483 of 547

Kali- I have done research, and it does seem like that protocol is for me. Although I am annoyed that they were so quick to make that judgement. I only brought it up because Aura had a similar experience, though I am still going through with it. Those all sound like great signs to me. Congrats on doing the transfer!


Blue - excited for you. how are you feeling about this?


I have been following a thread for a few days about a woman who wants to have a baby and give it to her IF friend. The posters seem to think that having somebody else's sperm inside you (sperm donation) is "icky" and "weird"  and that egg donation is "unethical" I have been mildly amused because most of these women have like 5 kids, and obviously have not had trouble. I wonder if they would think it is "unethical" and "icky" if they had to make a choice to do it or not have kids at all. I bet most of them would do it. Some people were saying that they are grossed out by the idea of having another mans sperm in her body (other than DHs). The whole conversation is so uninformed and clueless it is making me laugh. If If has taught me anything, it is that you never really understand somebody's struggles until you have been there. I think I am a much more emphatic person than I was before.

post #484 of 547

kali- Yeah, the cost isn't scaring me as much as it was before. I am getting used to the idea of going straight to IVF instead of doing IUI first. I am jst trying to prepare myself as much as possible for that to come. It is a huge step but one that I have to take.

post #485 of 547

Deportivo: Glad you're getting used to the IVF idea. It is SO overwhelming at first! But I promise you, it isn't as bad as you think it's going to be, once you're in the middle of it. 


Kali: Sounds so promising!!! I hope you get your BFP next week!!


Blue: I am wishing you so much luck tomorrow! I am so rooting for you!!!



post #486 of 547

Blue - just one more day!!  Do you know what time it will be yet?


Silver -  I think it's great that you've decided to go!  I'll bet you being in that environment with a good group of women will actually help you to stay connected during it.  I'm so excited for you!


aura - Wow, I can't believe that he made that mistake in the protocol.  I can't blame you for being nervous, especially after he made you feel so comfortable and prepared at the consult.  You are dealing with enough, you shouldn't have to add in micromanaging.  Ugh.  I'm sorry about the sperm donor too.  I'll bet you find one that's even more charming, more intelligent, more handsome, and your DH's doppelganger!!  Allow yourself to pout!  BUT, things WILL be just fine.  You caught it, you're now on the right protocol, you'll be able to find another perfect donor, and this WILL happen!!


rcr - I'm sorry that you too got the same vibes.  I'm glad that you still feel OK in moving forward with them, because really, that's what matters!  I am laughing about the thread you were following.  I can't POSSIBLY imagine that EVERY ONE OF THEM were virgins until their first time with their husbands.  Soooo, yeah.  At least it gave you some good laughs!  It's true though, you can't judge someone until you've walked in their shoes, because you never know the situation.


kali - 5 days past FET, could be implantation!  I've heard that with FET's they implant a little later than with fresh cycles, so it sounds like good things are happening to me!!


AFM - I'm taking the leap and officially moving to grads.  I'm going to hang around as there are a lot of you in the beginning stages of a new cycle, and I want to help cheer you on!  Had our u/s today, saw one little perfect bean with a heart beating away.  THANK YOU ladies for all of your support!  Now I'm hoping that I can continue to support you from the other side, and remind you that it CAN happen!  grouphug.gif

post #487 of 547

Hey all!!!  Sorry I have been out of touch lately b/c things have been crazy busy and I don't have much time to post right now b/c I'm waiting for DH to get home so we can pack up the car and hit the road and we hope to get to our Aunts house by 9-10pm tonight.  So my quick update is that our FET is scheduled for tomorrow at 11am and we have to be there at 10:30am. We are hoping to take Abby to the local Dog park in that area before the transfer to wear her out a bit so she will be tired while we go to our appt.  She will stay at home w/ our Aunt.  My blood work that they did for the bruising came back fine i guess, so nothing to worry about there.  I guess they think it must just be the prednisone, but i think maybe it is something to do w/ the Lupron maybe b/c i think i remember  I've had it before just not this bad, so maybe it is the mix.  So that is the scoop.  I'll do more personals later b/c i know i'll be forced to stay on bedrest for Friday and Sat, so I'll have time to catch up then.  Thanks everyone for all of your kind words and thoughts.  It is kinda bitter sweet that this will be our last trip to my RE's in that area (if we get a bfp we go to a different office that is like 3 hrs away instead of 4.5-5hrs away).  It is a little unreal that this is it so I'm just hoping and praying that this last one works!!!!  More soon!!  Sorry to be all about me.


Hope - congrats on the good u/s!!!!!!!joy.gif

post #488 of 547

Blue: loads and loads of luck for tommow!


Aura and rcr: hope things work out for your cycles.  being right on top of docs is not something I'm good at but you do have to be your own advocate here.


Kali: good luck with your tww!


rcr: I totally get what you mean about being more epmathetic.  I'm ashamed to admit I used to be a bit concenred about single mothers and now I'm planning to be one!


AFM: I'm just a bit down in the dumps about having another pregant friend! How can everyone else find it so easy? I was suppost to be staying the weekend with them but cancelled, so I hope I haven't offened them.  I was having a bit of a moan on facebook (just a genral moan not about my frined) and one of dh's best friends who has completly ignored me since dh died, didn't invieit me to his leaving party but now takes it on himself to suggest I shouldn't moan on facebook! Can we say unfriend! thanks for letting me have a little moan here!

post #489 of 547

Any you all share your experience with Califrnia Cryobank or Fairfax to get sperm (cost, process, etc.) we are thinking of using donor sperm for some of the eggs.

post #490 of 547

RCR - Jumping in to say you may find some more info about the banks in the Queer Parenting area.  There are lots of discussions about banks there.  Some people are very happy with Fairfax, but I have also heard a lot of complaints about service and quality (i.e. vials with low counts).  Their prices are fairly low though.  I don't know too much about California Cryobank.  We are using The Sperm Bank of California and we are very happy with them.  I have also heard good things about Northwest Cryobank.  They are on the less expensive side.  Good luck!

post #491 of 547
Thread Starter 

rcr- for our first round we used xytex and i LOVED it.  great service, very responsive, not too expensive, and they had adult photos.  which was the best.  our dr now prefers california or fairfax, so made the switch to california.  i don't like fairfax because their site is hard to navigate, and they are expensive!  each little thing you want to learn about the donor is a la carte, and photos are like $80 PER DONOR.  what a ripoff!  california is okay so far.  the only thing that bugs me is that they don't have adult photos at all, so we're trying to base it off of baby/childhood photos.  it's not the same, but i'm learning to be okay with it.  i can't even imagine how someone could select a donor without photos at all.  i basically go first to photos, then medical history, then read up on their personality.  if the total package feels right, i save them to my preferred list, and once i've got a few together my dh and i sort through them.  i think it's too daunting a task for him to go through hundreds of donors, but i kind of love it.  it at least makes me feel like i have control over something!  


with xytex i was able to find someone that resembled dh a teensy bit.  his adult photos at least looked like my father in law when he was a young man, so that worked out great.  at california i'm not really seeing anyone that jumps out at me as a physical resemblance, so i'm going more for certain features, like, my dh has blonde hair, or someone who is at least his height.  my dh is also a writer, so we're interested in people that are creative, etc.  it's just a gut feeling i guess.  i still mourn the loss of ability to use my first donor, he was the best.   california actually has a "celebrity look alike" matching service, so as a joke i kept looking up actors i thought were hot and telling my dh we would have a baby that looked like batman (christian bale), or chris hemsworth, or ryan kwanten.  hey, they're kind of blondes! i figure if i have a choice, i'd at least like my kid to have a potential to be intelligent, kind, creative, and attractive.  why not? 


the sperm ranges from 5-700 a vial, my dr always requested at least 2 vials in case something terrible went wrong with the first.  once i ordered it, xytex fedex'd it to my re where they kept it frozen until the day of the procedure.  pretty easy.  xytex's samples were always good quality too, good numbers, etc.  i believe we paid an extra $35 for them to select the best samples from my donor.  

post #492 of 547
Thread Starter 

silver, moan away!  we are all entitled.  if someone doesn't like it, they have the option not to read it!

blue, i am thinking the most wonderful embryo growing thoughts for you!  i am really hoping this is your bfp, you deserve it.  keep us updated when you can, we're here thinking about you!!


hope, amazing that you saw the heartbeat!!  congrats on your graduation, please feel free to check in on us, we love the suport!


kali, sounds really positive!  when is your test date? i'll add it to the front page. 


rcr- in regards to protocol, now that i'm doing LA_E2P i think we're probably on almost identical cycles.  however even though we suffer from different issues, both of our issues come down to egg quality, so it's actually good to see consistency in protocol.  i'd be more worried if we had opposing issues and were treated the same.   i think i have come to realize that even though i am expecting the very best and full attention from my re, in reality he is trying to squeeze in time with so many other women just like me, and if it means i have to just pay closer attention, then that is what i'm going to have to do.  i know he's a great re.  i know he has been successful on so many others.  my last protocol was crap and go me nowhere.  this protocol is SO different, at least i will know what happens on the other side of the spectrum.  we're in good hands! 


afm, today is my cycle day 9 and i started the opk.  i've never used one before and i'm terrified for some reason it won't show the surge properly and i'll mess up the whole month.  panic much? i think i'm going to go saturday to the lab and get the rest of my bloodwork done.  i also need to call around and find a place to do my ultrasounds.  there is another RE clinic about 20 minutes away, so i am going to see if they would do monitoring for me.  i think i'd be more comfortable with an re doing the monitoring, or my obgyn (although i don't know how much experience she has measuring follicles? how often do they do that?) than i would just going to a radiology group and having a random tech do it.  i have a lot to do before mid june, and i think i need to just compile the info and make a list so i can cross things off.  

post #493 of 547

I have a little more time to write more.


Blue - Thinking of you, friend. I hope this is it. I am staying positive for you.


Silver - that is so insensitive (the guy). I get it about the pregnant people.


Aura - thanks. Fisch recommends the same two places.


So, the thing about donor sperm. We have had two cycles with zero fertilization. If I was the kind of person to get like 15 or 20 eggs, the normal thing to do at this point would be to do half with donor sperm and half with DHs. But, the problem is that I am not that person, and I get more like 6 eggs if I am lucky. So, the down side of using donor sperm is that if we fertilize half with donor, it really limits our chances of using DHs because that means that we only have three (if we are lucky to get 6) eggs with DH.  Even though DH has tested for decent sperm (and with ICSI it really doesn't matter anyway), there is really no true way to tell if it is sperm or egg unless we do donor. Although both REs suspect egg more than sperm, I am still a little skeptical that sperm is not just a little at fault. So, what to do? If we just get zero fertilization again, this will be another try wasted, if we use donor sperm, and those fertilize but others don't, then we will know it is a sperm issue (as well as egg, probably). What would you all do?

post #494 of 547
Thread Starter 

it's a tough call, rcr. we did half and half on our second ivf, but i had more eggs to work with.  dh's didn't even make it to day 3, the donor's did, although the embryos were pretty bad and we are blaming that all on the egg.  how does your dh feel about this?  my dh is still pretty sensitive about it, but since he doesn't really want to have surgery on his testicles he's willing to move on.  if both dh's sperm and donor sperm fertilized eggs, i assume you'd use dh's?  i do think you'd have to talk about all the possibilities ahead of time.  like what if his fertilized but the other embryos were better, etc.  or what if there were only 3 eggs? who would get more? or just one? 


dr t asked us if we wanted to try again with dh's, but like you, i'm worried enough about egg issues, i don't want to factor any sperm issues into the equation as well.  but that's just me.  it can't hurt to have a backup plan.

post #495 of 547

Aura - can you explain what you know is wrong with your DHs sperm. I know what retrograde MF is, but can't they just use TESE to get some sperm. What is the quality issue? DH has a decent (poor) analysis (just fine for ICSI), and a good DNA analysis, but i am wondering if there is some other issue (not sure what that could be).


Does a good semen analysis and good dna analysis assure us that the sperm is fine to use? Or are there other factors that can not be tested for.


Dh actually feels just fine with donor. He doesn't out much emphasis on DNA.

post #496 of 547

Theresa - Thought of you today when I had my saline sonogram.  It was a horrific experience.  The nurse told me to empty my bladder prior to the procedure and the doctor immediately said because of that it would be very painful.  curvy cervix, 4 catheter and 2 balloon catheters later, we finally had success.  I had contractions and pain.  BAD.


Hope - So happy for you!

post #497 of 547

Blue, just thinking of you today!! I'm sending you baby dust vibes and really really hoping that this is it!!! BIG HUGS!

Aura and Rcr, how frustrating about your doctors!! Rcr, I'm hoping that he actually came up with your protocol because of his discussions with you and not just willy nilly. That's my hope anyway and i'm still optimistic that it's going to work! It seems like such a different and especially aggressive regimen that it has to work! 

Aura, ARGH to needing to remind the physician about stuff. I felt like I had to micromanage my nurse too...on some level, I remember feeling that they just didn't seem to care as much as me. And realistically, they didn't. So just keep your chin up and never worry about asking questions and in fact, questioning them about stuff. As for OPKs, I remember I used to do the OPKs 2x a day...one in the morning and one in the afternoon to reduce the chances that I would miss anything. I went on Amazon and just bought the cheap ones.


I'm so hopeful for you and Rcr!! 


Silver, DEFINITELY unfriend. What an ass. Some people really do grow up to be unfeeling jerks. Argh, I'm so annoyed for you! Complain away here! We're happy that you have an outlet.


Kali, hoping for the best!! My first pregnancy sign was sore breasts too so i'm hopeful for you!



Just wanted to check in ladies. I'm going back to stalking but just wanted to say that I'm hoping for a very happy next few months!! More BFPs!!

post #498 of 547

poking my head in to say good luck today, Blue!


rcr - I'm laughing about that thread and also shaking my head.


silver - moan away!  We all understand and welcome your venting!


hope - COngrats on a great u/s!  We're glad you can join us on the "other side"

post #499 of 547
Blue. Hoping for the best today!
post #500 of 547

RCR - Great!! As long as you feel comfortable that is what counts.  Cant wait to know how things progress.  About the ladies who feel it is "icky" obviously do not understand what it feels like to be in our situtions.  People will always have negative comments to make when they have no clue about what it is really like.  It is actually quit silly and immature.  I am so thankful to have all you great ladies to chat with about our journeys!.


Hope - Thank you!! I am praying for the best!! I am soo happy for you!! That had to be the best experience ever, too see your little ones heart beat!! Precious!!


Blue - Thinking of you!!


Silver - We are all here to listen and help where we can! Air hug!!


Aura - Thank you! I am hoping, hoping, hoping!! =) I test on the 27th of May.


Rena - I hope this is it!! They are still sore and I am still cramping in my lower abdomin area.  I am now 5 days post transfer.  Can these cramps be menstrual pains? and If I test at home, what day would be a good day?

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