SLEEP - Page 4 « Back to Group Discussions

[TalkToMeNow]

I'm sorry you are having sleeping issues, J! Sounds like you've gotten some good advice. I don't have much to offer. I know Jasper is picky about his sleeping surface. He likes my mattress because it is a bit soft. He does not like his crib mattress because it is so firm and plastic-y. So he wakes up easily when I scoot him into the crib. He sleeps better with a heavier blanket on him. I think it's the weight. Hmmm... That's really all I've got! Sorry!

Jasper sleeps okay. He does prefer to be touching me. And he nurses a lot. But usually he isn't too squirmy. The nights he squirms are awful, so I understand your pain! Do the boys nap at the same time? Can you nap with them?

[birdhappy85]

Sora is super picky about sleeping surfaces too. She loves our bed, but what baby wouldn't love a giant pillow-top mattress? She wakes up a ton if she's in her pack 'n play. She is not a fan of that thing. I've tried making it more cushion-y with folded blankets for her to sleep on, but she still wakes up a lot in it. She does well on her firm crib mattress but she sleeps on a textured blanket in there too. She doesn't like sleeping on a bare cold sheet. Not comfy enough. I don't blame her. I'm super picky about my sleeping arrangements too...

I wish I had some advice! 

[EonJourney]

I have to commiserate with you...my 2 little boys wake up every 90 min to 2 hrs all night so I am up about every hour. DS1 was that way too and thank goodness I know that it will get easier. He is 3 and sleeps thru the night.

[CDsMom1031]

I'm sorry you ladies are still having sleep issues! I couldn't imagine. O_o Here you guys are, wishing for more sleep, and all I want is Conner to stay awake more. LOL Seriously.

The last few weeks he'll go to bed around 8-9p, wake up at 8a to eat, then he'll go back to bed until about noon.

[Mal85]

Greta has such a hard time getting into a deep sleep until everyone in the house goes to bed. She is a really light sleeper and I swear she can just sense that we are still awake. I lay her down sometime between 8-9 every night and she will wake every 20-30 minutes until we go to bed. But then we have nights like last night. She took a later nap and we went to visit friends, so we were out later. She got to bed for the night around 10:00, we went to bed about 15 minutes later and she didn't do the whole waking every 20 min. 

I do wonder if this would be different if she shared a room with her sister. Like she knows she sleeps in the same room as DH and I, knows that we are not in bed yet and doesn't like it. Maybe if she was in a room with her sleeping sister, would she stay asleep? I don't know if I'm up for trying that out. DD1 does sleep like the dead, so I'm not too worried about Greta waking her up. It would require a lot of rearranging of furniture though, and we may be moving the next few months so I really don't want to move furniture around and then just move it out again anyway.

Oh well, I guess I'm just here to whine a little. J, I hope the EC things works for you! Greta sometimes wakes at abnormal times and I always think maybe she has to pee when she does that. She doesn't want to nurse, just super squirmy like she can't get comfortable. It's not every night though, so I haven't put much thought into it...

[birdhappy85]

I thought bedtime was rough before? Wow was I mistaken... Putting to bed an entirely resistant spirited mobile baby is absolutely ridiculous. RIDICULOUS. DH has such an easier time getting her to bed now than I do... Boy how the tables have turned! He is becoming a super baby-wearing daddy and getting her down in the Boba on my work nights. Makes it seem so easy. This is the first night I've had to get her down by myself since she can both sit and stand up on her own now, and of course she resisted the Boba and everything else I tried. I just spent 1-1/2 hours working with her and she finally tuckered herself out after the 50th time getting up and crawling around. Wow. Just wow.

I think I've just gotten a glimpse into our future with a toddler...

[seraf]

Joanie, I think it is close to peak now. That drive to move, we're feeling it over here, too.  S tries to nurse to sleep standing up. Have you tried rocking her to sleep again? Like, really vigerously? On nights when S is especially fighting sleep, I nurse him while bouncing on the exercise ball. Once his body is totally under his control (walking?) I think he will change gears again and no longer be a perpetual motion machine.

[Jaimee]

Ah, sleep... just when ya think you've got it all figured out, they mix it up on you!  It's one darn thing after another... teeth, illness, milestones, travel, more teeth, more illness, more milestones, fears, on and on until they mature enough to figure it out.  But the good news is, they all do eventually!  We're in a complete crap sleep phase with both boys right now since we've been dealing with teeth, illness, daddy traveling, and 4th of July fears.  More travel coming up and most likely more teeth and eventual mobility... I figure I'll get some sleep again next spring after the winter illnesses.

[jbk21]

a

Edited by jbk21 - 10/6/12 at 10:19pm

[seraf]

J, good points about late naps.  I resort to bouncing when he is obviously tired, rubbing his eyes and falling all over himself. If he's happy, I don't care how late he stays up.  The big kids go to bed at 9 and I lay him down right after. Once they're in bed, he is usually ready.  Sometimes he falls asleep during their story time, but I think the distraction helps him calm down enough to go to sleep more easily.

[birdhappy85]

Leave the room to wind myself down while Sora is in her crib winding herself down?  I wish! She flips out if I leave her in any room alone in the evening, for even a minute, and then goes into meltdown mode very quickly (which I want to deal with even less after a long day). I try to avoid that and do whatever I can to get her down with minimal angst on her part. That's the reason it's stressful to get her down. We're 100% tied to her for 1-2 hours at bedtime. We also do make sure she is actually tired when we put her to bed. She is very predictable in that regard at least. Like Jaimee said, just when we figured things out, she switched it up on us! This crawling/sitting/standing thing really threw me for a loop. So we're trying a few new things now that are working fine, just time-consuming for me at least.

On a positive note, I think I'm noticing Sora self-soothing to sleep a little bit more at least! Even if I'm having to be present in the room, it's still a huge breakthrough to see her drifting off to sleep without crying AND without being held. That probably sounds like daily life for many people, but it's been a long difficult road to get there for us! DH is liking the babywearing-to-sleep so I'm glad that's working for him while I'm at work. He and Sora are so bonded and in tune now, it's the best progress ever. 

[Jaimee]

Originally Posted by birdhappy85 
 Even if I'm having to be present in the room, it's still a huge breakthrough to see her drifting off to sleep without crying AND without being held. That probably sounds like daily life for many people, but it's been a long difficult road to get there for us!

No, that sounds equally a miracle here, too.  We're having to rework this with ds1 ever since the 4th of July.  Avery, no way.  I wait until he's clearly tired and then we nurse and he falls asleep.  Usually this is around 9:30.  Once he cuts out his late afternoon/early evening nap then he'll go to bed earlier, but for now, I just wait it out, no use pushing it, like J and Sarah said.  It's when he's wide awake at 11pm that I would resort to more active putting to bed techniques.

[jbk21]

Originally Posted by birdhappy85 

Leave the room to wind myself down while Sora is in her crib winding herself down?  I wish! She flips out if I leave her in any room alone in the evening, for even a minute, and then goes into meltdown mode very quickly (which I want to deal with even less after a long day). I try to avoid that and do whatever I can to get her down with minimal angst on her part. That's the reason it's stressful to get her down. We're 100% tied to her for 1-2 hours at bedtime. We also do make sure she is actually tired when we put her to bed. She is very predictable in that regard at least. Like Jaimee said, just when we figured things out, she switched it up on us! This crawling/sitting/standing thing really threw me for a loop. So we're trying a few new things now that are working fine, just time-consuming for me at least.

On a positive note, I think I'm noticing Sora self-soothing to sleep a little bit more at least! Even if I'm having to be present in the room, it's still a huge breakthrough to see her drifting off to sleep without crying AND without being held. That probably sounds like daily life for many people, but it's been a long difficult road to get there for us! DH is liking the babywearing-to-sleep so I'm glad that's working for him while I'm at work. He and Sora are so bonded and in tune now, it's the best progress ever. 

Nope, definitely not daily life here!  

 

Edited by jbk21 - 10/6/12 at 10:19pm

[birdhappy85]

Oh yeah, J - I totally haven't gotten around to reading a book on development yet. Grrr. I SO want to but rarely find the time right now (I have concentration/reading comp issues so I won't soak in much if I'm reading while tired - which is me pretty much all the time lately, bleh). BUT I want to add more books to my list of those I intend to read. What are your fave suggestions regarding development?  (Anyone else chime in too. I know several others on my list came from Jaimee's suggestions!)

[jbk21]

http://www.amazon.com/Whole-Brain-Child-Revolutionary-Strategies-Developing/dp/0553807919  :-)

[CDsMom1031]

When I lay Conner down and he goes into crawl mode, I leave him alone. I've got a baby monitor I can watch him through, so as long as he isn't fussing or crying, I leave him to wind himself down. He'll crawl around his crib for a solid 20 minutes before he finally lays down and goes to sleep. I actually enjoy watching him, because he talks more when he's alone than he does when he's around me and DH.

He isn't quite pulling himself up yet, but he's super close and he has done it a few times, so we did lower his mattress so I don't have to worry about him going overboard, too.

[jill the pill]

Audrey is all of a sudden napping and staying asleep for more than 15 minutes at a time.  I feel so free!  I usually have to carry her around in the beco to fall asleep.  I've been just putting her down and leaving the room. It takes her 10 or 15 minutes to settle down but she does it by herself. 

[Jaimee]

Joanie, I also really like the Your ___ Year Old books by Louise Bates Ames.  I don't think they made one for under one year old, but you could get the one year old one since that's just around the corner anyway.   They are a quick read and contain some very dated pictures, but jewels of information that I haven't found in any other books I've read. 

http://www.amazon.com/Your-One-Year-Old-Fun-Loving-12--24-Month-Old/dp/0440506727/ref=sr_1_4?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1342635690&sr=1-4

 

[LunaLady]

Joanie, have you read Our Babies, Ourselves? I just got done reading it (finally) and I found the chapter on sleep incredible eye-opening. I feel like it changed how I feel about bedtime completely. 

[MrsKatie]

Joanie, .  I think this is a crazy time for a lot of us with regards to sleeping.  I get worried about it too; KJ has decided her bedtime is pretty consistently 10pm, and even when she's 95% asleep, she can't help pushing herself up into a sitting position over. and over. and over again.  She never soothes herself to sleep, either.  There have been maybe 3 times when she's nursed, turned away (still slightly awake), and settled to sleep herself.  But even then she's pretty much nursed to sleep first.

I say this with great compassion and empathy: try to see the humor in this.  Oh I wish I had a better way to say that; I know when my DH tells me to see the humor in something that is pissing me off, I want to set his face on fire.  So please, don't set my face on fire when I say that lightening up and laughing a little will do you a world of good, I promise.  Last night when KJ was compulsively sitting herself up at 10pm (after acting sleepy for more than an hour), and DH and I just started laughing... oh what a weight was lifted.  Cause what am I gonna do?  She's doing what her body and mind COMMAND her to do.  She's not being contrary or bratty, you know?  So is the case with Sora.  Plus, you will blink and she will be a preteen who doesn't need your help ever and you might even be wistful for these days (maybe).

I do relate, I really do.  But I think approaching this with a light heart and a sense of humor will help you feel better all-around.  Again, .