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Evenings with 12-month-old not working

post #1 of 3
Thread Starter 
I'm looking for some advice from moms and pops who cosleep yet still experience Really Bad Sleep for everyone involved. DD will be one in a couple of weeks. I'm without DH three nights of the week, and we have a 4 yr DS, so we've always started the night with DD: BF, rock, set in her crib. She had been sleeping for a few hours there at the start of the night, which was great. I could get DS tucked in without leaving DD alone in our bed (from where she has fallen twice now). She'd wake three hours later or so, and I'd bring her into our bed for the rest of the night. For the past few months, that window of evening sleep has narrowed to 20 minutes. Then 30 minutes to resettle her. Then waking every hour. For the past few weeks, I cannot even set her down without her waking. Then poor DS is losing out on tuck in time. I realize we could be in the midst of sleep regression/teething/cold season/separation anxiety/sleep pattern shift/some other cause that we will never uncover, so I'm simply hoping to ride this out. The choices we seem to have deal with the logistics. Do we: A. sleep together in a safe place like her floor? B. Push for crib sleep at the start of the night (a la Pantley or something moderately gentle) C. Keep doing what we're doing until she possibly goes back to a sane routine. Thanks in advance for your consideration/commiseration!
post #2 of 3

I don't really have advice, I just wanted to say that we are going through similar sleep problems here. DS will also be one in a few weeks. He usually wakes up every 1.5-3 hours to breastfeed, but every few weeks we go through a nasty phase where he wakes every 30 minutes or so the whole night long. So far these bouts have always passed within a week or so, so I assume it has to do with teething or growing. I hope that your DD is just going through a phase and things will level out again soon! Good luck!

post #3 of 3

It does sound like a normal developmental phase to me, but then there are so many when they're that little! 


I can share what we do and maybe there'll be something in it that could help you. 


When I'm solo parenting, I take the 4yo to his room to read books (with a flashlight, which makes it exciting and special) while I nurse down the baby (now 22mo, but we've been doing it this way for a goodly while) in the big family bed.  When the baby is asleep, I turn on the video monitor and take it with me to tuck in the big kid.  I stay in the room with the big kid until he falls asleep (we sing a few songs, etc.), which usually takes anywhere from 20m to an hour.  Then I go do my thing for a while, going up to nurse the baby back to sleep as need be.  When I finally go to bed for the night, I carry the 4yo to the big (king-sized) bed and we all sleep together there through the night with me between them.


I know it doesn't help much to hear it, but no matter what things will change.  It never stays the same long when they're so little!  Hang  in there, mama.

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Mothering › Mothering Forums › Baby › Co-sleeping and the Family Bed › Evenings with 12-month-old not working