Thought I'd get this started again a little early for next week since I feel like chit chatting!
Hope everyone is doing well, feeling at least ok, if not great.
DS is 10 months old today. The fastest, slowest 10 months of my life, somehow.
So I'll just dive right in with what's on my mind. I've been struggling at work, feeling torn between my pediatric clients and my family since going back last September. I was happy to go back and get out of the house a couple of days during the week, but then ds's sleep issues slapped me in the face. He started waking every 2 hours around 4 months and nothing has really improved since. In fact lately he's been waking up around 3 or 4 am and taking about an hour and a half to get back to sleep. He's also an early riser--somehow he's managed to wake up at 5:30 even after the time change, how did he know?--and a poor napper. I'm so exhausted, and I don't feel like I'm doing well at my job or for my family. Lately my boss has been on my back about getting documentation in on time despite her knowledge of my situation--i.e. pregnant, nursing, not sleeping, on the verge of crazy--and it was kind of the last straw for me. Last night I sent them my resignation letter, and I'm feeling conflicted. It's still early in this pregnancy, and I've mc'ed before. That said, even if I wasn't pregnant, I would still not be happy at my job. I'm lucky that it is even possible for me to stop working. Really I was not making much after we paid the nanny. Then there's also the part of me that is wondering if I will really be happier staying at home every day with ds and then both of them come November. I need to find a community, sign up for swim lessons, music class, etc. I guess I can do that now that I can put all of my energy into my home and family. I'm hoping that I'm not being rash because of these pregnancy hormones. I'm hoping that without sharing my energy and efforts with work, I can find some peace in this pregnancy if finding rest is impossible. Anyway, I know I'm not the only one struggling with home life and work and feeling anxious about the future with two little ones. I need some inspiration, some perspective, something to help me find some balance and some joy in my current situations.