Its a long story. At 28 weeks I was measuring 8 weeks too big. I went for an ultrasound and my son had a duodenal atresia, a blockage in his instestine. leaving him unable to swallow and process amniotic fluid. I had severe polyhydramnios (high amniotic fluid levels), and found out I was in preterm labor at 28 weeks, and dilated to 2 cm. I was on an off bedrest, in and out of hospitals for the next two weeks, until they had to amnio reduction. At that time they found out he had down syndrome. The plan then was to keep me heavily medicated to stop contractions and did 2 more amnio fluid reduction to try and keep me pregnant as long as possible. This meant almost daily hospital admissions, perinatologist appts, and now additional screening for problems because of the down syndrome diagnosis. By some miracle we made it to 38 weeks. He was double footling breech because of all the excess fluid that was still building up on a daily basis, and still always in labor. I was a walking time bomb. Because of all the fluid, I was at a high risk for expelling the umbillical cord when my water broke, and pinching it once all the fluid drained. The speciality hospital that was equipped with the high risk NICU for his medical needs because of his intestinal problems was over an hour cross town, and in 2 months, he never flipped head down. It would have been a very high risk of death for me to stay at home, and hope by some miracle he flipped and didnt pinch the cord when my water broke. I was really not happy with a c-section, especially because I never got to see my son for hours afterward... he was rushed out of the room, but also because it was so cold nad impersonal. My regular perinatologist was out of town, so I had the doctor on call and was treated basically like a cadaver. My questions were not answered, no one would tell me what is going on, no one told me when they were going to start or what to expect, no one told me what happened to my son. I told my husband to stay with the baby, so I was all alone... for quite a while. It was really emotionally hard. My son was in the NICU for 19 days total, and had surgery 5 days after he was born to correct his intestinal blockage. This was, as you can imagine, just about the roughest birth you can imagine. Sitting in the recovery room, alone, husband had to go back home to take care of house, pets, and my parents in town, listening to other people love on their babies, for 2 days, until I told them they either discharge me or Im leaving AMA. I couldnt go to the NICU whenever I wanted because they were so busy with medical test and such, and had to coordinate hospital transport to take me down there, which often did not show up, or had to call many many times,and by the time i got there, they often sent me back to my room because they were sending my son to xray or something and I missed my window of opportunity.
I know its much riskier for baby and me to go through another c-section. I dont know if I can deal with my second and last child (my husband is getting snipped, we just want 2 kids), going to the NICU because of a surgery I didnt need, and being alone again. I will have no choice but to lift my 1 year old son because he will most likely not be walking or crawling at that point as he is 7 months now and neither sitting or rolling (we are working on it.... and so is his therapy team). I will have to care for a newborn and a baby the moment I get home, no sleep, no recovery time. My mom lives an hour away, but doesnt drive and my dad works full time. My motehr in law lives in town but works 3 jobs I will have no help. I know my husband will try to help, but he has a lot of work he has to deal with with our self employment that cant be put off o put on maternity leave. Im stuck!
My husband of course is listening to my mental debate on this matter, but I know he would feel better if I was in a hospital, even if that meant another c-section, with the big medical scare with my son, it kind of opened our eyes to the idea that big problems can happen. There is no medical or genetic reason why this pregnancy would be another high risk pregnancy. All the high risks associated with my first pregnancy were due to my sons down syndrome and intestinal blockage (a common problem with kids with DS). There was nothing "wrong" with how my body reacted to suspect that I would have problems on later pregnancies. I never had problems with high BP, sugar, no swelling of feet hanfs, healthy weight gain, etc etc. All ultrasounds on this pregnancy look like a "typical" pregnancy.