So tired of hearing how "securely attached" toddlers will not go through terrible twos. - Page 2

[lvingmommy]

I know how frustrated you feel Mrs. T,

After reading everybody's posts, I have now come to realize that my daughter is attached to me and that I am not alone. I did not have terrible twos. I had the horrible 3s and 4s happen to seem to be better. I am home more often now and am learning how to manage my temper and how to redirect my daughter's temper. Now I am coming to a point of establishing chores like picking up after herself and making her bed (with some assistance) before being able to go outside or to our sunroom play area. The problem has to do with getting her to do these things. Some days are easy and some days are extremely difficult. To the point of not allowing her to play with her toys for a period of time because she would not pick them up.

Any advice?

[cgmama]

I have five children ranging from 9 down to almost 2.  They have ALL gone through a tough toddler period at some point.  My almost four year old is just edging out of it and I can see the almost two year old gearing up.  Fortunatly, the bigger kids have all out grown it, so I know that it ends!  AND I am happy to say that the bigger kids have become secure and independent.  Actually, they are more secure than their non-AP'ed peers.  Which I find reaffirming!

[LynnS6]

Yeah, it's as annoying as the people who told me that if my child was securely attached, he wouldn't go through separation anxiety. Ds started at four months and it lasted pretty much until 4 1/2. He's still a pretty cautious kid. It's his temperament. Dd didn't show much separation anxiety at all, but boy did she tantrum. (Actually she still does, and she's 7. It's getting better, but she's got some powerful emotions.)

Attachment has nothing to do with typical developmental stages. Or with temperament. It really doesn't.