Chubby toddlers growing into normal weight children?

[transylvania_mom]

I need reassurance. Dd is 2.5 y/o and 37 lbs. I know I feed her well, I cook from scratch, she doesn't eat junk food, and we have dessert once or twice a week (mostly 2 chocolate squares). We don't buy soda. She has milk with her meals, and 100% juice not from concentrate every other day on average. She loves meat and likes carbs. She eats fruit and vegetables (only cooked, soup etc). Her portions seem to me large, compared to my ds's, who is slim, but if I give her smaller portions she asks for more.  She eats 3 meals and 2 snacks a day.

I don't know what to do. I serve balanced meals and I don't want to restrict her diet because her 7 y/o brother is very slim and needs to put on some weight.

I need your reassurance, advice, stories of chubby toddlers who grew into their weight... We went swimming yesterday and I was surprised to see that dd was almost double than the other toddlers her age.

She is also BF and in 90 percentile for height.

[NiteNicole]

My daughter has always been a "good eater" and a chunk.  Not fat, but on the rounder side.  She is, at six, starting to thin out.  She has been roughly the same weight (she's actually down a few pounds - if not for frequent doctor trips I wouldn't know this) for about three years.  She has a dress from three years ago that still zips just fine (used it for something else).  She's still one of the rounder kids in her class, but she's also one of the taller kids.

I have had issues with food/weight my whole life and I do NOT want to foist these on her.  I don't keep junk in the house.  I pack her lunch. She's as active as she can be considering her movement disorder (uses a walker, can't run).  I just keep our food options health, keep us active, and I'm waiting for time to do it's thing.

IMO, just like some kids don't eat at all, some kids have big appetites.  And just like some kids can eat everything in sight and never gain an ounce, some kids really hang on to their calories.  My daughter gets healthy food in reasonable amounts and she's as active as she can be, her cousin eats nothing but EZ Mac, cookies, and hot dogs, drinks COKE all day long and does nothing but watch tv and she's falling off the bottom of the charts.  My SIL's family is just built like beanpoles.  My family is not. 

Every book I've read on the subject says the same thing for kids who are over and underweight - parents decide what and when, kids decide if and how much.  Trying to get one kid to eat while trying to get another to eat less is just going to set one up for control issues and the other up for an eating disorder.  As the goal for BOTH kids is the same, we should treat them the same.

Good luck.  Everything in the world is all about how fat kids are getting and what parents are doing to cause it.  Some kids are just bigger.  If you're providing health food and plenty of activity, you just have to trust that time will take care of things.

[Youngfrankenstein]

I think with this day and age being obsessed with obesity, it's hard for parents who have a normally chubby child.  You have to know in your heart that if you're feeding her right, she is fine.  I have several moms from my DDC who's kids are younger than your DD, age 2 and a few months, that are at that weight.

I don't see anything wrong with being 90%.  Someone has to be or it wouldn't exist.  

[Emmeline II]

Is she "proportionate"? My ds looked at least 2yrs older than he was until he was 6yo (he was at the 97th percentile for height and 95th for weight); not overweight, he was just the size of an older child. There is a difference between an overweight child and one who is an appropriate weight for their height; also, children often grow "unevenly," gaining weight before height or height before weight. Now, my ds weighs a little less than would be proportionate for his height (which is taller than average), but children in our family tend to be tall and slim. If she hasn't had a check-up for awhile perhaps you could take her in for a height and weight check; she's probably perfectly normal, just not "average."

We also have to monitor our ds' weight; he takes a medication that can suppress appetite. You could try keeping fuller fat versions of some items for your ds; that way they are eating the "same" items but your ds could eat Greek yogurt (more fat) and your dd "regular yogurt."

You could drop the milk at meals and make the new policy water with meals; this is what we do and we have a fridge that dispenses water and ice so they can serve themselves. You could also drop the juice altogether; health-wise it's closer to soda than a piece of fruit.

I would return to giving her an appropriate first serving (several studies of adults have shown that we will eat what is in front of us, hungry or not--though young children generally don't operate this way), and give her a second serving only when she asks; even if she asks a lot she will still learn what a serving is, and what is "more."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Just wanted to add that ds stopped his rapid growth by Kindergarten, though he did gain an inch and a half of height this school year.

Edited by Emmeline II - 4/1/12 at 6:26am

[pbjmama]

My ds was 32 lbs at 18 months. At that time it was the upper limit to rear face and I remember being so stressed about turning him around.  He is now almost 6, 60 lbs and 50 inches tall. He is a big, solid guy, usually about the size of a child 1 year older. He isn't what I would consider chubby. He eats like and adult and is very active. I will say that I have cut back on milk with him but not much else.

[coldandsleepy]

My older son started out as a VERY fast gainer.  He was 9 lbs at birth and 15 lbs at 6 weeks.  He wore 2T clothing at 9 months old and was 31.5 lbs at 15 months old.  So let me say:  I understand entirely being concerned about what a chunk your little one is/was!

But here comes the reassuring part:  he did stop growing so quickly.  For him, he slowed down right around 18 months, when he hit 32 lbs.  He's now a touch over 2.5 and weighs about 33 lbs.  He's still big, no doubt about that, but he's no longer *outlandish*.  We actually meet kids who are larger than him sometimes now.  I wouldn't have believed this would ever happen a year ago.

[meemee]

what were you and her dad like at her age?

dd's dad was a chunk till he lost it at 14.

dd at 9 is still a chunk. absolutely obese and off the BMI charts. yet on a hike no one can keep up with her. she easily out walks other serious hikers on a difficult hike. 

she is active, eats well - i am not worried.

today i feel 'obesity' is the next new word. and in the name of obesity - a lot of wrong is being done. 

dd is tall too - the 3rd tallest kid in her class and youngest. 

[motherhendoula]

Well we just returned from a well visit yesterday and my DS is 19 months old - 36" tall and weighs 45.6 lbs.

i would NOT be worried about 37 lbs!    My LO is outgrowing disposable diapers and im worried this winter will be a very tight fit into his car seat! 

keep her moving around - at 3 she can probably get involved with some 'organized sports'  - i second the no juice, no dairy milk.  Some have suggested to me that if i would stop nursing this baby he would drop the weight - which will be great - in another year or two or three

We dont eat flour, sugar or dairy ...although its nearly impossible to get my in-laws to follow those rules!  I too, make everything from scratch and he really seems to like veggies and fruits and ground turkey!   

We take several walks a day and im just hoping he can maintain this weight until he grows another 6 inches - which, at the rate he seems to be growing will be September of this year.....

i wouldnt worry - you have all the time in the world to make changes!

[mamazee]

My older one was top of both the height and weight charts when a toddler and now (at 10) is slim to normal weight. She got thin by 4 and has stayed that way. The second one is on the high end of toddler age and is starting to slim down, but she was chunky too. She is also very tall.

[pigpokey]

I would consider giving your son and daughter both appropriate serving sizes and not giving seconds.  I am not aware of the evidence that we should let kids determine how much to eat.  MANY CAN, but there's nothing wrong with modeling "we eat appropriate servings to satisfy real hunger and then we stop."  Also, obviously your son should gain weight, because he is going to be growing up.  But it's rare that a child will undereat.  Perhaps you are confusing your son eating just right, with your son not eating enough.

[Super~Single~Mama]

Don't worry about it. My older brother was the fattest baby around, and he was chubby until he was about 5. Now? He's 27, 5'10" and might weigh 160 sipping wet. His life revolves around food - although he has no sweet tooth and lives in Korea where they eat Kim Chee for breakfast (which suits him fine).

[nextcommercial]

Most do, but not all.  I can tell when my daycare toddlers are little if they are going to outgrow it by age two.  I've have one that is now 8 yrs old and weighs 120 lbs.  Another girl her same age is also very heavy.  At age two, you could tell they weren't going to grow out of it.  

The first girl will probably always be heavy.  She won't eat any food that has even ever touched a fruit or a vegetable.  She'll eat ONLY highly processed foods.  The healthiest food she eats is packaged fruit snacks.  She eats massive amounts of snack foods.  (hostess, Little Debbies)  She doesn't enjoy physical activities.. she's a quiet kid who prefers to play with toys in her room, or read...she's very bright and loves to learn facts..so, she could spend hours alone reading "Useless facts" and "Believe it or not".  I love that part of her....She knows a new useless fact every day.  But, she'll probably always be heavy unless she decides to change it, and that won't be until she's an adult.  Her baby sister is also going to be heavy.  

The second girl will eat healthy.  She just likes mcdonalds and canned raviolis too....but, if only given healthy meals, she eats very balanced.   She's super active, she loves sports and playing outside.  They moved recently, and she now lives on a street where all the kids play out in the street on bikes and scooters...so, I feel like she will burn most of this off if they just cut down on the amount of food she eats.  (she loves to eat)

Childhood obesity is on the rise.  It's not a secret.  Most kids were thin in the 70s, you saw the occasional chubby child, but now you see more chubby kids than thin kids.  I took my daughter back to Tennessee when she was little, and we were literally stopped by complete strangers to ask me why my kid was so skinny.   We were there a week, and I heard at least ten times a day "Wow.. she's a skinny one.. don't you feed that one...that girl needs a sandwich".  

Honestly though, I'm not sure I think 37 lbs is all that big though.  I can't really envision it, because I don't weigh my daycare kids, so I don't actually know what they weigh.  I'm sure they weigh under 30lbs though...which really doesn't seem like a huge difference if you factor in size and height.  I know my own daughter was big at that age, she grew much faster than other kids until about 1st grade.  She was always taller, sturdier, and just big.  Never chubby or puffy, just big.  

[pigpokey]

A quick look with a BMI calculator and she is probably in a  BMI range that they'd call overweight but not obese at 90th percentile for BMI (assuming 30 months, heigh 3'2" which is about 90%, weight 37).   If you see she's storing fat, I'd just stop giving seconds and start distracting at the end of meals until that habit is broken (Hey, guess what!  We're going to the park!  No we have to go right now!).  Certainly a child can be that weight and not be overfat, but you see fat and are concerned. 

[savithny]

My DD was born at 10 pounds, doubled her weight by 5 mos, and was approaching 30 pounds at 1 year.   She's always been >95% for height and weight.

At 2yo, she was all round cheeks and chubbby knees.    

We just kept feeding her good real food and encouraging outdoor play.  I have NEVER mentioned her weight or talked about weight loss in front of her, but we do talk about good food choices and picking good fuel and building blocks for your body to grow.  We do make cookies and eat treats sometimes, too.   I'm a "in moderation" type parent, and there are few foods that are totally forbidden.   

At 8.5, she's tall and lean and muscular.  She has long, skinny legs and arms.    She definitely grew into her own body.  She's the tallest girl in her class and one of the tallest in her grade, despite having a later birthday.  But she's completly proportional - her weight is just right for her height.

[NiteNicole]

Originally Posted by pigpokey 

I would consider giving your son and daughter both appropriate serving sizes and not giving seconds.  I am not aware of the evidence that we should let kids determine how much to eat.  MANY CAN, but there's nothing wrong with modeling "we eat appropriate servings to satisfy real hunger and then we stop."  Also, obviously your son should gain weight, because he is going to be growing up.  But it's rare that a child will undereat.  Perhaps you are confusing your son eating just right, with your son not eating enough.

Every single book I've read on the topic says the same thing - the parents decide when and what, the kids decide what and how much. So you provide healthy choices at regular times and let your kids decide which things they'll eat and how much.  If you're providing cake as part of your meals, this is probably a spectacularly bad method to use but I doubt the OP is doing that.

[sharon71]

My middle DD weighed the least of the 3 at 6lbs by 4 weeks she was 8lbs she was pretty chubby as a baby and toddler. as a teen she is 5ft 8 in and 108 lbs.

My oldest DD weighed 7lbs 8 oz at birth she is now 5ft 9 in and 125 lbs

the youngest was 7lbs 3 oz at birth and is 6.5 she is 4ft 1 in and weighs 54lbs.

[transylvania_mom]

Originally Posted by NiteNicole 

My daughter has always been a "good eater" and a chunk.  Not fat, but on the rounder side.  She is, at six, starting to thin out.  She has been roughly the same weight (she's actually down a few pounds - if not for frequent doctor trips I wouldn't know this) for about three years.  She has a dress from three years ago that still zips just fine (used it for something else).  She's still one of the rounder kids in her class, but she's also one of the taller kids.

I have had issues with food/weight my whole life and I do NOT want to foist these on her.  I don't keep junk in the house.  I pack her lunch. She's as active as she can be considering her movement disorder (uses a walker, can't run).  I just keep our food options health, keep us active, and I'm waiting for time to do it's thing.

IMO, just like some kids don't eat at all, some kids have big appetites.  And just like some kids can eat everything in sight and never gain an ounce, some kids really hang on to their calories.  My daughter gets healthy food in reasonable amounts and she's as active as she can be, her cousin eats nothing but EZ Mac, cookies, and hot dogs, drinks COKE all day long and does nothing but watch tv and she's falling off the bottom of the charts.  My SIL's family is just built like beanpoles.  My family is not. 

Every book I've read on the subject says the same thing for kids who are over and underweight - parents decide what and when, kids decide if and how much.  Trying to get one kid to eat while trying to get another to eat less is just going to set one up for control issues and the other up for an eating disorder.  As the goal for BOTH kids is the same, we should treat them the same.

Good luck.  Everything in the world is all about how fat kids are getting and what parents are doing to cause it.  Some kids are just bigger.  If you're providing health food and plenty of activity, you just have to trust that time will take care of things.

Thanks for replying. I've also had (still have) issues with food and I don't want to project them on my children.  I don't insist that my ds eats more, I didn't restrict my dd's diet in any way until now. I just serve everyone the same and as much as they ask, then worry about it and ask questions on MDC :) But seriously, I might suggest to ds to have some more food, but if he refuses, I just drop it.

Originally Posted by Youngfrankenstein 

I think with this day and age being obsessed with obesity, it's hard for parents who have a normally chubby child.  You have to know in your heart that if you're feeding her right, she is fine.  I have several moms from my DDC who's kids are younger than your DD, age 2 and a few months, that are at that weight.

I don't see anything wrong with being 90%.  Someone has to be or it wouldn't exist.  

I agree with you, society is obsessed with obesity nowadays.

Originally Posted by Emmeline II 

Is she "proportionate"? My ds looked at least 2yrs older than he was until he was 6yo (he was at the 97th percentile for height and 95th for weight); not overweight, he was just the size of an older child. There is a difference between an overweight child and one who is an appropriate weight for their height; also, children often grow "unevenly," gaining weight before height or height before weight. Now, my ds weighs a little less than would be proportionate for his height (which is taller than average), but children in our family tend to be tall and slim. If she hasn't had a check-up for awhile perhaps you could take her in for a height and weight check; she's probably perfectly normal, just not "average."

We also have to monitor our ds' weight; he takes a medication that can suppress appetite. You could try keeping fuller fat versions of some items for your ds; that way they are eating the "same" items but your ds could eat Greek yogurt (more fat) and your dd "regular yogurt."

You could drop the milk at meals and make the new policy water with meals; this is what we do and we have a fridge that dispenses water and ice so they can serve themselves. You could also drop the juice altogether; health-wise it's closer to soda than a piece of fruit.

I would return to giving her an appropriate first serving (several studies of adults have shown that we will eat what is in front of us, hungry or not--though young children generally don't operate this way), and give her a second serving only when she asks; even if she asks a lot she will still learn what a serving is, and what is "more."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Just wanted to add that ds stopped his rapid growth by Kindergarten, though he did gain an inch and a half of height this school year.

Yes she is proportionate. She has a belly though, and the pants don't fit her at the waist.

She doesn't have a lot of juice, maybe one cup every other day. I really don't want to make it the "forbidden fruit" by taking it out of the kids' diet completely.

[transylvania_mom]

Thank you pbjmama, coldandsleepy, motherhendoula, mamazee for sharing your experience. It's very reassuring.
 

[fruitfulmomma]

My chubbiest toddler is tall and slender at 7yo. 

The only thing that sticks out to me is that you said she has a belly. A distended belly *can* be a sign of wheat or gluten intolerance. 

[serenbat]

Originally Posted by pigpokey 

I would consider giving your son and daughter both appropriate serving sizes and not giving seconds.  I am not aware of the evidence that we should let kids determine how much to eat.  MANY CAN, but there's nothing wrong with modeling "we eat appropriate servings to satisfy real hunger and then we stop."  Also, obviously your son should gain weight, because he is going to be growing up.  But it's rare that a child will undereat.  Perhaps you are confusing your son eating just right, with your son not eating enough.

Every single book I've read on the topic says the same thing - the parents decide when and what, the kids decide what and how much. So you provide healthy choices at regular times and let your kids decide which things they'll eat and how much.  If you're providing cake as part of your meals, this is probably a spectacularly bad method to use but I doubt the OP is doing that.

I completely disagree with small children deciding on WHAT & HOW much- we do not allow three bananas or 2 whole avocados at a single meal as an example of what my young child would pick to eat

we limit and we do this with several things in our child's life - we limit toys, clothing and food is no different- we talk about why we don't need 6 of the SAME toy car or 4 of the same shirts the same way we talk from a young age about size and type of food- a small child WANTS many things and food (healthy one too in large amounts) as well as a material objects, and I feel it is good to start the conversation early and very often! This same conversation of portion size and type leads into alcohol consumption talks down the road. We talk about why we start with a small serving size and why we try lot of different things and when it is and isn't appropriate to have a second serving.

I raise one into her 20's so far without an eating issue (with great BMI and healthy attitude towards food and alcohol) doing it this way (and it was the way I was raised and others I know as well- all without eating issues) and I have seen many get eating issues and many of those same not learning self regulation in their early years and struggle later because of it.