~~Infertility ONE thread, April 2012~~ - Page 9

[SilaMarila]

Thanks Gozal! I just talked with the nurse and she recommended abstaining until the IUIs as well. Especially since we did BD last night.

[toothfairy2be]

Sourire- I know there is a lot of information going on around here and I understand wanting to know every possible scenario as I too am the ultimate control freak. Somehow I felt different before my LAP, I didn't want to jump to any conclusions so I tried to know as little as possible before hand. I hope all your questions have been answered so you are comfortable going in. I do have faith that everything will go as planned and you will feel relief coming out. It was as strange thing, the only emotion I felt after was relief. There was some amount of confused hope but basically what they found was nearly exactly what I expected and it gave so many answers for everything I have felt for years. I hope you come out feeling that way, that the next day (although groggier) is brighter and your future horizons are like a rising sun. I'll be thinking of you tomorrow, can't wait for the update!

Sila- Sounds like everything is coming together, seriously good move on your doctor not making you wait to start the clomid cycle. This is it my friend, see you on the grauates side

shesaidboom, teresa, brichole, krunchyk- There are probably more MIA's out there I missed but wanted to send a shout out that I'm thinking of you guys.

hope- It really seems like you just started here and you are already halfway through your 2ww. Time is flying by! I am sure for you it doesn't feel that way but for me (in my boring past 6 weeks of nothingland) it seems like it went so fast.

smiles- I hope your doctor has an answer... as for DH insurance, people are so ignorant.

mexi- Was your next beta today?! It had to have been late implantation, so exciting!

monkey-  It was a weird thing that led me to her site but I am so glad I found it. It felt like a weight lifting to have it so easily worded and make sense in my head why some days are good in some ways and bad in others. As for the blogroll scandal- there was one original blogroll- all inclusive for infertility, loss, adoption- called Stirrup Queen. So then this other girl decided to start a blogroll (basically a blog that lists/sorts related blogs, so you can connect with other similar things) exclusively for Parenting after IF, loss, adoption. The original one got terribly offended (as there was a section for PAIL on her ALI blogroll) and she made a huge thing over it. I had to do some research to get the whole story. But it all seemed a little 'you can't be friends with me and someone like me too'. Not very nice. Complicated anyway-- why can't we all just get along?! I don't blog, nor do I follow a huge number of blogs but it was interesting anyway and I am so glad to have found that one.  Also, thanks for cheering me on, I'd love an immediate BFP but am trying to be prepared that it is more likely not in the cards and enjoy every minute of my life right now.

gozal- Like I just said, I'd love it to happen sooner than later, but I am trying to take advantage of the here and now. Instead of revolving my every action and reaction arond TTC I am back to 'real' life and just hoping on DH being home so we can 'try'.

AFM- One more work day until vacation- I am still days off from O but AF is finally gone. I did do the Femara but I took it as prescribed in NaPro, not as I would with my RE. They prescribe (since I ovulate monthly and on time) 3 pills (so 7.5mg?) on CD3. Enough to boost your bodys follicle maturing abilities but not so long that it affects your natural estrogen production. So now I wait for signs of fertility and get on my hubby. It is only supposed to be 30 degrees F in Quebec, Brrrrrrr. Lucky we know some ways to keep warm. Also, I'm 2/3 done Fifty Shades of Grey... yup, getting my 'mommyporn' on- to hopefully achieve the 'mommy' part ASAP.

[mexilady]

Beta today 145!!! Almost trippled in less than 48hrs. Dr. said this is a game changer, keep on taking Crinone, and see what happens. He is satisfied with the trend, so no need for more betas. He thinks I probly implanted late, so time will tell. I have a thankful heart today. Hope all is going well with everyone. Will be thinking of you Sourire tomorrow, hoping surgery goes well girl!

[SilaMarila]

Cait - I love that you are taking advantage of the here and now! That is hard to do. Interesting about the NaPro protocol being so different! Are you charting your temps since you won't be monitored? Have a wonderful vacation!!!

Mexilady - 

Sourire - Waiting for your update tomorrow! Good luck and speedy recovery!

Hope, when you get a chance do you want to update my blurb?

Sila (26) DH (29) TTC#2 since 12/10 rarely ovulating with PCO and motility/morphology issues. 1/12 DH starts intensive acupuncture. 2/12 First Clomid cycle no response. 3/12 Motility up to 50%, penetration 100% all with acupuncture! 4/12 2nd Clomid cycle with IUI!

[Milk8shake]

Mexilady - Congrats!  That's a great number.  

AFM: I didn't mean to be all dramatic and run out the door with no explanation.  I am just lost for words, really.  I don't know how to put heartbreak into words.  

My results, (AMH and NKC) were, of course, normal.  This I was expecting.

However, the doctor has changed his tune re: our situation  He really thinks that we need to go straight to either IVF or surrogacy.  He doesn't really feel that he can keep me pregnant.  

I've had a second opinion, which was equally doom and gloomy.  Even through all of these losses, I keep thinking that one day it will happen for me, but now I have to accept that there are some people that it just doesn't happen for, and it looks like I am one of them.  

I'm not being pressured either way, but I feel with my known uterine screwiness, that I would really be mad to spend a fortune on IVF and put a baby in my useless uterus.  It seems to me that surrogacy is probably our best chance.  But, it is nightmareishly expensive, and we simply cannot afford to do it.  

So, we won't be TTC.  We won't be anything.  My life as I thought it would be is kinda over.  I know that sounds like melodrama, but that's how I feel.    

Although there are people here that I care about, being in a place like this doesn't help <me>.  If it weren't for the weight loss challenge thread, I would likely leave MDC altogether - but something useful might as well come out of all this crap.  Anyhow, that's it - where I stand.  I am sorry.  

[deportivo4]

Sila- Hey, I didn't know that you were doing IUI. That is a good questiong. I havn't thought that one through yet.

goza- Did you get pregnant with your twins doing IUI? Do you mind me asking because I am doing IUI in May and just wanted to know more about the success rates for that.

[deportivo4]

Milk- uh. I am so so sorry. I can't say that I know how you feel cause i don't. But I can imagine how difficult that is because of my own heartache. I have been thinking of you so much. I wondered about you and worried about you. I can't imagine what you have been through. I have had my own thoughts that are scaring me that I may have to use a surrogate too. Also I can't afford to do that. I am pretty sure that I have had 5 losses, but two of those were in my twenties when I wasn't actively trying. So, it is more than beyond heartbreaking. I can't imagine what pain you must be feeling right now. If you ever just need someone to vent to or listen to your feeling. I really just want you to know that I would listen. And you can PM me whenever you want.

\

There are no words I know for me to say to take away the pain. I do want you to know that if you need someone to just listen to you poor your heart out. I would be there. It hurts, I know. It hurts beyond.

[lilacvioletiris]

Sila, glad that it looks like you are going to O!  Hope the acupuncture works.

mexilady, yeah for high betas!

milk, sorry to hear of the prognosis for you. The financial side of getting pregnant is so annoying and disheartening for me as well and then age of my DH and me plays into it too.

AFM, this EWCM madness continues.  Last night my breasts felt tender, so I figured this morning my temp would jump.  Nope, lower yet.  After DH appointment this Friday, I think I am going to call up the NaPro doctor who is 2 hours away and see if we can get in (if the urologist gives us any hope that sperm may be manufactured by my husband to get me pregnant).

[Sourire]

Lol I accidentally posted in the IVF thread earlier, my brain just doesn't work this early in the morning. Here is my post:

Originally Posted by Sourire 

mexilady - I'm so excited for you!

milk - it's totally understandable that a TTC forum would make you feel awful right now. Its hard to imagine anything more difficult than what you are going through. Something that might interest you: I heard a show on the radio the other day about going to India for surrogacy, apparently it's pretty popular due to the price. I will definitely look into that if ever I reach the point where it looks like I have no chance of giving birth to my own child (I also found out on the same show that surrogacy is illegal in Canada ).

AFM - it's 6am and I'm on my way to the hospital. I thought it was ridiculous that they wanted me to be there at 6:30am, but I totally see their plan now! I'm so tired that getting "put to sleep" pretty much sounds like the best idea in the world! Talk to you all on the other side!

[hope4light]

Chica - YEAH!!  I'm so excited to move you to Grads!!  I'll do it tonight from home!!   

 

Sila - Thanks!  Wow, that sounds like a nice big fat egg preparing to be fertilized to me!!  I will update your blurb from home tonight!

gozal - Hi!

tf2b - I'm laughing because just the other day I was thinking this too.  It feels like just yesterday that I joined the IF threads again, and I'm so close that I can taste it now!  On the other hand, the 2ww itself is dragging so freaking slow.  Beta is next Friday, had to change it because I'm going out of town for work on Thursday and I don't want to get the news while I'm driving, just in case...  Yeah for vacation!!!  Where are you going?  I'm sure you've mentioned, but I can't seem to remember....

mexi - That's Amazing!!  Congratulations!!!!!   here's to a h&h 9 months!!!

Milk - I'm so sorry honey.  Big hugs to you, I hope that you are able to come to peace with your decision, and you never know when the game may change.  Good Luck, we will miss you around here, but understand why being here would be so painful.  I can't imagine what you are feeling right now.  Big big hugs. 

lilac - ah to craziness!   

[wissa19]

Milk - I don't think you sound melodramatic at all and there's no need to apologize for your feelings.  I'm so sorry you didn't get better news and I think you have every right to feel devastated.  I honestly don't know what I would feel, think or do in your situation.  For sure your heart is broken and I hope that you are able to heal and find happiness.  However, you must first grieve for what you thought would be.  

Mexilady - Whoohoo!  Another graduate.  That beta sounds very nice and more that doubling sounds even better.  Congrats!

Sourire - Hoping your surgery goes well!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Toothfairy - 3 pills femara got me my BFP!!!!! I did some reading up on femara and it there hasn't really been any research to determine the proper starting dose and most doctors just use it the way they would clomid.   - check out this link http://www.isrn.com/journals/obgyn/2011/242864/   -The Use of High Dose Letrozole...

Sila - Good Luck with trigger and IUIs.

lilac - That Insurance person sounds likes an idiot.  You need to find out if your insurance covers the diagnose of infertility.  My insurance didn't cover "infertility", but it did cover any tests to diagnose it such as SA.  You may want to get a copy of your policy that will outline exactly what it does and doesn't cover.  Also, call the office that submitted the claim and see if it could be filed under a different code.  

[rcr]

Milk - Sorry. I don't know what to say. It just really sucks. I hope that time will heal things for you, and you can move forward with happiness. I will miss having you around here, but I understand that it is not helpful. I have felt that way several times, and left, and felt good about my decision.

Sourire - your post on the IVF thread made my laugh, even before you posted again when you realized that you were posting on the wrong thread, because I knew you were posting on the wrong thread. Anyway, you are always welcome over there.

[SilaMarila]

Deportivo - Yes planning 2 IUI's this cycle! Mostly just to give us the best chance, but also because DH has had some motility and morphology issues. I'd be happy to answer any questions (haven't actually done the IUI yet though). And Gozal is a busy pregnant lady so I'll answer because I also love success stories! Yes, she got pregnant with her twins with a Clomid/IUI cycle!

Milk - I'm glad you at least stopped by so I could put an end to all of my wondering. You're still in my thoughts though.

Lilac - NaPro sounds like a great addition to help you out with your decision. THe financial side of this really is all so hard. If this cycle fails we're going to be running out of money sooner than later and it so scares me out of my mind.

Sourire - LOL on your posting in the wrong thread! I've said a couple prayers for you today. I hope you are well into the recovery stage at this point.

Hope - Thanks. My follicle/egg got even bigger/fatter!

AFM - Triggered. Everything still looks really really good. The RE was happy we waited bc my follicle was 25mm today.Lining was 9.something mm. First IUI is tomorrow morning and she thinks I'll ovulate sometime around tomorrow night and we'll do a second IUI Sat morning. DH just left for acupuncture to get his swimmers ready. We're going out tonight and I'm planning to have what I hope is my last margarita in a long time.

ETA - I'm so uncomfortable. My follicle feels HUGE. I'm positive I have never ovulated this strong before on my own.

[deportivo4]

Sila- Thanks, oh that is good. So, how do you do two IUI's in one cycle? I just wanted to talk to you. I havn't done my IUI yet either and we are still deciding on how to go about it the best way in May. Are you doing acupuncture as well? I want to try that with my IUI cycles. In general acupuncture has helped me a lot before.

I have been trying to find someone else that is doing IUI or has had success with IUI. So, thanks for answering my questions.

When are you starting your IUI, and would you mind keeping me updated on how that is going for you. I have been scouring the internet trying to find successful IUI treatments. I havn't gotten the results back yet from DH's sperm, so in any case I am not going to even rely on getting pregnant on my own anymore because of the over three yrs it has taken us already. However IVF seems a touch out of our reach at the moment, and I am still sorting things out with my insurance to pay for the drugs! We may not need to do IVF, if there is success with IUI and depending on what the doctor finds! We shall see. I am just glad to find someone else doing IUI too!

Thanks for answering!

[SilaMarila]

Depo - As you know there is a short window of opportunity to become pregnant once the egg has been released (give or take 24 hrs). With IUI they try to time things as close as possible within that window. My Dr. thinks I will probably ovulate tomorrow night (35hrs or so after the trigger shot) so our first IUI is scheduled for the morning. The sperm can live longer than the egg so this will ensure that there are already sperm inside my uterus swimming up my tubes to meet the egg as soon as it is released. The second IUI will be most likely after my my follicle has already burst and the egg has been released but still within the window of egg viability. Does that make sense?

I am also doing acupuncture and have been doing it for a year come next month! I'll of course be updating here! Our doctor requested a Sperm Penetration Assay at the beginning of this cycle to see if we were even candidates for IUI or if we needed to go straight to IVF. Depending on what your SA reveals that is another option to help make the decision. 

The actual IUI is not expensive. Only $260 at my RE. But with all of the monitoring/depends on how many u/s you get how many IUI's you do I think generally costs between $600-$1000 for a IUI cycle.

Someone (Sourire?) shared a document on Clomid IUI that is very informative. Check it out! Ok I don't have permission to attach documents here is the link to the different IUI documents.

http://www.soft-infertility.com/cycles.php?scID=1

[deportivo4]

Sila- Thanks Sila that is really helpful. Yeah that makes sense. I guess that was kind of a stupid question, so they are adding 260 to the cost of that cycle than. I didn't really know that was an option. I havn't gone through all of my options yet with RE. The two fertility drugs that were offered with the program are Letrozole and Puregon. Clomid wasn't mentioned in the outline. Each cycle for me is 500.00. I am going to ask about doing IUI twice in one cycle if it increases the chances Why not!

Ok thanks for sharing that. I will see whether the doctor recommends doing IUI still or going straight to IVF.

Thanks.

[toothfairy2be]

Sila- Go trigger go, go trigger go! I am excited to hear how it went when I get home Sunday. Let the 2ww begin!

deportivo- I did IUI 4 times and I think Sourire has done at least 2, shesaidboom has done 4 or 5 (is that right, we started around the same time?) so if you ask questions we have answers . Mine were covered by insurance so my IUI cycles cost me $25 copay and the cost of meds, all of my bloodwork and monitoring was covered 100%. Clomd/Letrazole were about $10, but gonal-f (puregon) was around $700, so consider that when you talk to the RE. I know some people have better prescription coverage but worse RE coverage so it helps to know what you are getting into financially so you can make your plans. I found the procedure itself to be just mildly uncomfortable just trying to get the speculum positioned but the insertion of the catheter isn't bad since you are ready to ovulate on your cervix is very soft and open. Keep us updated and good luck!

lilac- I'm obviously a strong advocate for NaPro. Now you need good news from the urologist! The appt just cannot come fast enough!

milk- I don't even know what to say. I just feel so sad that they didn't have something enlightening to tell you. How is that even possible? Why do they think IVF should be an option if you can already get pregnant naturally... I understand the surrogacy/gestational carrier aspect, but why IVF if you want to try again on your own? I know you many not be around to answer these things  and it is probably all things you are trying to answer yourself, I just wish there was something we could say or do to help your healing. I understand your need to find some sort of closure and remove yourself from TTC, I will continue to pray for you on your journey and hope in the future you find a famly building option that works for you.

wissa- the thing with NaPro is it is just 3 pills on CD3, no more days, just that one day as a jumpstart to improve quality of ovulation. I want to follow in your footsteps though!

Sourire- You are certainly home and snuggled on your couch or bed resting by now. The hardest part is behind you, everything from here on out is about moving forward and your body healing. I will be watching for your update and still praying all is going well.

AFM- CD8, going away CD9-11 with DH for romantic rendevous to the Castle in Quebec, then DH will be in Illinois CD12-16 sooo.... the odds are not in my favor. Oh well. I need to stop procrastinating and start packing!

[Sourire]

Hey ladies... Had my lap sometime around 11am by my calculation. They found a bunch of endo on the outside of my uterus (but nowhere else). I don't know what stage exactly but they said it's not mild or severe, it's somewhere in the middle.

Recovery went very smoothly until about 4pm (the time I was supposed to be leaving the hospital). I could not pee, started vomiting a lot, and developed an unusual side effect to one of the meds. I felt like there was an elephant sitting on my arms and legs! I had to wait hours to talk to a doc about this side effect. Doctor ended up clearing me, but the result of all this is that I got home at 9pm, I have yet to keep down anything (including water), and my arms and legs still feel totally weird!!!! Hopefully things get better tomorrow!

[deportivo4]

toothfairy- ok, thanks. Yeah, I am pretty much all ready to go. My insurance is covering the drugs, not the running of IUI. So, that I pay for. Still it is lightyears away from the cost of IVF for us. It may be all we need. I am going to see what else I can do to increase our chances.

I am getting excited to try though! I feel like I am trying for the very first time, except scared cause I know what can happen.

But, yeah I will keep everyone posted and let you know how those appointments are going. What medication I end up taking etc.

[shesaidboom]

Hi ladies! Firstly, thank you so much for all the good thoughts. This has been a bumpy ride.

hope4light - Yes, the RE is at the same office as the first. Her reasoning for doing 6 rounds of ovulation stimulation was that it often takes 6 months to a year for couples who ovulate normally to get pregnant, so it can be the same way with infertility patients. I disagree though because statistics show that 90% of IUIs will work within the first three. The thyroid thing - it's so very frustrating. I am having a really hard time trusting doctors after all of this.

I'm so excited about your IVF cycle and am hoping things went much better this time.

SilaMarila - thank you. My doctor has never mentioned anything about Prolactinoma, but I'll definitely ask about it.

The finding out someone is pregnant when not knowing is a huge trigger for me too. It sucks.

Hurray for ovulation!! That's very exciting. I hope that means a BFP is coming soon.

Sourire- it's really upsetting that you can't even get on the wait list until after 3 injectible cycles. Why can't they put you on and take you off if you get a BFP in the mean time?

I'm glad your procedure went well, but the side effect you had sounds awful. I'm sending good thoughts for a comfortable recovery.

chica - I know I'm late to the party, but CONGRATS!! I'm so happy for you.

mexilady - firstly, big hugs to you, what an emotionally charged situation. I am so glad it is ending with GOOD news. Congrats to you!

rcr - I really hope things turn around for you soon.

Charley - Thank you for sharing your experience with your sugery. What a nightmare that allergic reaction must have been though! I was thinking latex. Do you know what the balloon was made of?

gozal - thank you so much. I am going to send you a pm later on if you don't mind.

toothfairy - thank you for the thoughts. I've been thinking about everyone here and have been hoping things have been going well.

Yes, I've done 4 IUIs. All my ultrasounds/blood work was covered by insurance, but my meds (Femara and later on injections + ovidrel trigger + progresterone suppositories) were not. I did 2 IUIs each cycle except on the last. The first was $420 and the second was $200. They were always one day after another. I too found the procedure just mildly uncomfortable (except for one cycle where my cervix was very high and a not very nice doctor grabbed it and pulled it forward), mostly because they cannot lubricate the speculum.

depo - I hope IUI is all you need to get that BFP!

milk - I am so, so sorry. I can't imagine what you must be feeling right now. Having to leave is completely understandable. You have to do what is best for you. I have hope that one day you will be a mama, but until then, much love to you.

everyone else - I have been thinking about all of you and have been hoping things have been going well. Let's hope for lots of good news.

AFM - still playing the waiting game. AF hasn't shown up even though I am pretty late. The RE said to call if she hasn't shown up by 30 days post-appointment. The appointment was on the 11th so I think I may call in sooner. This is our second non-medicated cycle in a row so I was worried that AF would not show up on her own. I have been having a lot of pregnancy-like symptoms, but I've tested and BFN, BFN, BFN. It would have been nice to get a free baby though! I have been playing phone tag with the cardiologist, but still haven't got an appointment set up. We're also waiting for test results, especially the thyroid pannel. Thyroid problems run in my family, so it would not be a surprise. Dp and I have IVF class on Tuesday, which should be interesting! I really want to get back into the swing of things so this waiting thing sucks.