Cosleeping -- What works for you?? « Back to Group Discussions

[MIrandaM]

We're going to try cosleeping with this little one, our first :) but I could use some advice from you sage cosleeping mamas (and papas if you're out there)!

Does the arm's reach cosleeper or sidecar crib work for anyone?  I like the concept, but think that putting the baby back into the sleeper might be difficult to do without waking fully or waking the baby. 

Anyone have success with a baby hammock?

Anyone just push the bed against the wall and sleep with the baby between nursing mom and the wall?  I've read some things to say that's great, and safe, others say it's completely dangerous because baby could slide between the bed and the wall. 

Same for a guard rail.

Same for the foam wedge that goes under the fitted sheet.

Same for the snuggle nest or whatever other devices create a tiny bed within the bed for the baby. 

Does anyone just sleep with the baby on the edge of the bed, but within the crook of your arm?  In between both parents (with parents having separate blankets, baby having none)? 

What actually works for you? What didn't? What was a total waste of time? What was a lifesaver?

Help! (and thanks!)

[mole]

Miranda, there was some discussion of this in this thread: http://www.mothering.com/community/t/1346487/sleeping-with-baby

[MIrandaM]

Hi Mole, thank you! I have no idea how I missed that entire thread!    lots of good info there.

[ilovejeff]

I'll answer here anyway.

We sidecared out crib for a while, but dd never slept in it. Well may for an hour or so, but then she'd come into the bed to nurse and just end up sleeping in the crook of my arm for the rest of the night. The crib was a PITA to crawl around to get out of bed, so after a while we put the other side of the crib on and moved it across the room...she would hang out in there while we showered and for her naps.

For us, I always felt safest just putting my arm around her while we slept, with her either on the side or between dh and I. Dh takes a sleeping pill, so I always felt like I needed my arm as a barrier between dd and the edge or dd and dh.seperate blankets for dh and I, no blankets for dd until she got older...and then she would just kick them off anyway.

[Worldshakerz]

Definitely check out that thread, but just wanted to chime in here. I also just hold my babies in the crook of my arm, nurse to sleep and that's it. DH and I also had separate blankets; baby no blanket.

[MadiMamacita]

Originally Posted by Worldshakerz 

I also just hold my babies in the crook of my arm, nurse to sleep and that's it. DH and I also had separate blankets; baby no blanket.

same here. I had a bassinet attachment for my pack n play but I mostly used it to change/store diapers. Our bed is pushed up against the wall and normally I slept against the wall, baby in the middle, DH on the edge, and during the night I would put baby on the wall side to switch sides nursing.

[dmpkmom]

my first born slept best on me or in the crook of my arm as the others said. When we just had one, having baby b/w us was okay but as time when on and w/ my second (who acutally slept okay in the bassinet but I was ususally too lazy to move him there) I put him on the outside with the bed very very snuggly against the wall. We were in a king so my hubby was pretty far away from us and my oldest would sneak up in between.

I think you have to somewhat feel it out..some babies don't need to be so close to mom and some do.Some nurse every hour, some every 3-4. For sure if you are in fear of baby rolling off or in your partner's direction, be creative w/ what is gonna make you feel safe.The last thing you want is to be not falling asleep b/c you are fearful. If you have a extra twin you can squeeze on the floor, you can lay baby and you on there and then you can sneak back up to the big bed when you see fit.

[Lauren82]

I push the bed up against the wall (in the corner) and make sure the mattress is right up against it. I only keep one pillow in the bed for myself. I have my own blanket and the baby gets it's own light weight blanket.

DH does not sleep in the bed with me and a baby because I take up all of the space.

I have tried an Arm's reach co-sleeper. My babies did not like it because they wanted to be right up against me. I tried a snuggle nest and that was fail for the same reason as the co-sleeper. I tried the foam under the sheet bumpers and those were awful. My fitted sheet kept coming off.

It can be tough at first co-sleeping with a newborn because they are so tiny and they are good at pulling blankets over their faces. What I usually do the first month or so is sleep on my back with the baby on my chest. When it's time to breastfeed, I put both of us on our sides with a rolled up blanket behind the baby for support.

You'll probably have to experiment to find out what works best for you. I do know a lot of people LOVE the Arm's Reach co-sleepers. The downside to those though is that you can't use them when the baby gets old enough to climb out (which is usually around 6 months old).

[JuicyPakwan]

I have co-slept with 5 babies and like others they tend to stay under the crook of my arm and we like having bed pushed up against the wall it works well.    I have woken up more than a few times just in time to catch the baby from falling off the bed when they were older while that makes me amazed at the mother insticts I like to have something there to keep them from falling off the bed as they get bigger.  It has been a wonderful experience for everyone and we'll be doing it again.  It has become such a habit that there is a transition period for me when the move on to their own bed like I don't know what to do with my arm now it seems to be awkward.

[Carlin]

With my last baby we started with a hammock and used that part time and co-slept part time until about 5 months. After that we exclusively co-slept. With this one we will have a babybay co-sleeper (same basic idea as the arm's reach.) I really don't expect the baby to sleep in it much but I figure it'll make a good barrier so I don't have to worry about him/her falling off and provide some protection if and when our toddler decides to hop into bed with us too. I think if we had a bigger bed I wouldn't really bother but our smallish queen just doesn't have much extra space.

I'm wondering what everyone does for naps? DD had no interest in napping on her own until 7 months or so, but if by some chance we'll be lucky enough to have a good sleeper with this one, I'd like to have a safe place to put him/her down.

[MIrandaM]

Sounds like lots of babies are loving sleeping in the crook of mama's arm :)  Reading this thread has made me so eager for our baby to get here!  You guys sound like such great moms. 

Like Carlin, I'm also curious to see what people are doing for naps.

 

[JuicyPakwan]

To be honest naps for us are usually on me or my husband for the first several months.  I would rather have the baby have a solid nap 45min-1hour on me than a 15 min nap laying down and then cranky baby.  I actually get more done that way by taking a break with the baby.

[Lauren82]

During the newborn phase i nap with the baby. I'm lucky that DH can take time off work to care for the other kids so I can rest. When the baby is a little older I usually nurse it to sleep in the bed then sneak away. If all else fails, baby naps on me and I watch TV.

[hyde]

Newbie question: If the baby sleeps on your or your partner's chest/belly, does the no-sleeping-on-tummy rule still apply? It seems like tummy to tummy would make most sense, but I realized today that I really don't know.

[mamalovex3]

We coslept for the first 14 months with our girls (and probably would have continued if we weren't expecting another set!) and the best option for us was mattress on the floor, against the wall.  Since I have two, it's a little different.  I slept between the babies on a king sized mattress pushed against the wall, and DH slept on a queen size mattress pushed right against the king.  It's wall to wall mattress in our room!  Napping was pretty haphazard for the first year, in loving arms, sling, swing, carseat, stroller, bed, whatever works.  I definitely recommend the mattress on the floor - totally saves all that stress of worrying about baby going anywhere and if you nap your baby there too, no worries about if baby crawls off when you get to the mobile stage.

[Lauren82]

Originally Posted by hyde 

Newbie question: If the baby sleeps on your or your partner's chest/belly, does the no-sleeping-on-tummy rule still apply? It seems like tummy to tummy would make most sense, but I realized today that I really don't know.

The baby sleeps on it's tummy on me and others. My kiddos tend to be tummy sleepers as soon as they can roll over.

[MamanFrancaise]

My baby slept in between DH and I. We all shared a blanket but baby slept higher than us so the blanket basically covered her legs. She *always* slept with her hand in my hair and would wake up if she couldn't feel my hair so moving her to a co-sleeper was out of the question.

For naps, I'd nurse her in bed, laying down and if I was lucky, I could escape after nursing her to sleep.

 

[kay4]

I found an arm's reach cosleeper at Salvation Army for my granddaughter, but my daughter doesn't use it as a cosleep;er, just a regular 'bassinet' Baby sleeps in bed with her. I am going to use it for my baby but not sure if I'll use it as a cosleeper....I do have a 7 yo who sleeps with me also so most likely will use it when I get up or go to bed later for safety.  I love cosleeping

[help007]

My first son slept mostly in an arm's reach cosleeper, a little bit in bed next to me. By 4 months old, he had an easy transition to his own crib- by then, he was just rolling around too much in his sleep and it kept me up.

My second son slept mostly right up next to me. I kept the co-sleeper attached to the bed to 'catch' him if he fell, but he never tried to roll away from me. At 4 months, though, he was too wiggly in his sleep for me to sleep, so we had a horrible few weeks trying to get him to sleep on his own. It was worth it, though- I couldn't sleep with him next to me moving around a lot, so once he was settled in a crib, I was much more rested.

[Ava's Mama]

With DD we mostly co-slept but we were so nervous about it that is was stressful.  So we would try the bassinet for a few hours and then out of survival we would put her in bed with us.  I was so nervous as a first time mom.  When she was 5-6 months we put her in her own room in her crib, but she was an awful sleeper!  after struggling for a year or so (and doing more co-sleeping and not getting much sleep) we finally moved her crib into our room and she is now three and still in our room in her toddler bed.  She still wakes sometimes, but it makes life so much easier because I can just say "Ava, go night nights, mama and dada are right here, you are safe".  I am not sure what we will do with the new baby.  Probably be less nervous about cosleeping.  I am more trying to figure out what we will do with DD!  We plan on moving before the birth, so hopefully at that time we can get her a big girl bed and transition her into her own room so she isn't disturbed by the baby.