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My son is 18 months old and has always been a head banger, hitter, thrower and screamer. He has always been one of those split second mood swing babies and there is very little warning between happy and mad. Hugging, kissing, nursing and cuddling have all been my tools for calming and "resetting" his mood. For the last few days he has been amazing at listening to our words and so loving, he gives us kisses and hugs with no prompting and he has been sharing everything with us. The other side of that though, is that he has been hitting us randomly, really hard with no warning or reason that i can see. like at home one day when we are playing he will be super happy and laughing then all of the sudden he will take his big wooden train and bash us with it! or at the store he had a noise maker and just hit my mom really hard with it. So i need some ideas of what to do or say when he hurts people or when the hurt person is upset and doesn't know why i'm not yelling and hitting my child.
The other thing is he has been throwing things really, really hard and braking things. I try to tell him that if he throws it, it will break. He understands that, but he just does it without that much thought, then is always shocked when it breaks or it hits hard and makes a loud sound. His look is far away when he does it, so i really think he doesn't even realize hes doing it or maybe he is contemplating what will happen when he throws it?
He doesn't understand the word don't, so i tell him what i want him to do instead. If he hurts someone i tell him that that hurts and we should be gentle to people. I show him how to be gentle with my hands and he rubs the hurt person.
Yelling really hard has also been a new thing. He will yell his head off and get really red when he is done with what ever we are doing or we are not doing what he wants to do. we used to be able to talk to him about what is coming up and he would be happy again and talk to us about it. now he just screams at us.
I am not a fan of hitting or time outs and i always try to calm him down then talk to him about things. He is very smart and understands a lot for his age but the emotional things are still way above his head. I don't think he understands that other people get physically hurt. He knows that things hurt him but i don't know if he has put two and two together...
He is in underwear during the day and tells me when he needs to go and only has about two misses a day which are usually my fault so he is really doing great there for being 18 months old lol. I just don't have a lot of experience with emotional swings at *this age*...
He doesn't have a lot of boundaries right now, but some people tell me i need to start setting boundaries. I'm not sure what is appropriate for this age.
Edited by Kbugs mommy - 4/13/12 at 12:53pm