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Which transition method into own bed should I try?(Almost 3 yr old)

post #1 of 6
Thread Starter 

Hi there! We have been cosleeping with our nearly 3 year old son since birth. We would like to try to transition him into his own bed but aren't sure which method to try out. Maybe someone can offer advice on what worked or didn't work for them? We have consider the following options:

1) simply starting the bedtime routine in his bed, rather then our bed, and hope he can start falling asleep in there.

2) getting him to sleep in our bed, like we do now, but moving him into his bed once asleep.

3) moving him to a space on the floor in our room for now, to get him used to not being in direct contact with us.


I know a big part of the whole transition is what happens when he wakes up at night and calls for me. Do I try to get him back to sleep in his bed or just bring him back to our bed for the remainder of the night?


He has had his own bed in his room for about a year now and does nap it in every day. His room is also right across the hall from ours.


Thanks for any suggestions!

post #2 of 6

I'm not exactly sure if my advice is helpful.  We're kind of in the same situation.  Our 2 year old DD still co-sleeps and we are in the process of transitioning her to her own bed since Baby #2 is on its way and we don't have a bed big enough for four!


We got a twin size bed for her and it is right up next to ours, almost like one big bed.  She still nurses to sleep so (when we go to bed at a good time) I nurse her to sleep in her bed or, if we are off schedule... I will nurse her to sleep in our bed and then move her when she's sleeping.  She almost always wakes and needs me.  I get her up, take her potty and nurse her back to sleep in her own bed.  Sometimes it gets exhausting, or she has a bad night, and we will just keep her in bed with us.  But this seems to be a nice gentle transition.  It's going kinda slow though... I'm a little worried she won't be in her own bed by time baby is here.  But I don't want to force it either.


Don't know if that helps, but thought I'd chime in!

post #3 of 6
Thread Starter 


Thank you for chimming in! I like to see what others are trying. We don't have a deadline for the transition and are happy to take it slow. I am just trying not to tramatize him. :) I know that he is going to wake a lot in the beginning because he HAS to be touching us with his feet while sleeping. Sounds like a good plan for you and is gentle and I hope that things are how you would like before baby #2! Congrats, by the way!


I will post any progress we have.

post #4 of 6

I was having the same debate a couple months ago, when my DD (who'll be 3 in June) suddenly decided to sleep in her own bed and room one night. We just went with it, and have kept her in there since then. There have been a few nights when she's asked to "sleep in the big bed" with us but I've just told her that she sleeps in her little bed now but she can come to the big bed if she wakes up. Usually if she does wake up she's not even interested in coming in with us except if it's getting close to morning anyways.


The first couple nights I actually lay down in her bed with her until she fell asleep (not super fun in a toddler bed.) Now I usually sit on the floor beside her, but I'm trying to get her used to me leaving for a few minutes at a time (I tell her I'm feeding the cats or whatever and I'll be back when I'm done) and she's even fallen asleep by herself a few times. Bedtimes can still take hours and involve some major tantrums but that was the case when she was sleeping with us too and I don't think it's any worse.


She does still wake up from 0 to approximately 8 million times a night, but she usually goes right back to sleep and isn't overly upset about it.


I wouldn't have thought that going cold turkey would work but it's actually gone amazingly well. This seems to be the case for a lot of things with my daughter though. If I try to do anything gradually she just gets mad that the rules keep changing. I'm  not sure if that's typical of toddlers or just her personality.


If it was in the budget, I would have bought her a twin size bed first, but with a new baby on the way it wasn't feasible. I think it would have been easier to be able to occasionally crawl into bed with her but it hasn't been as big a deal as I thought.


I don't know if any of this helps at all. Good luck with the transition! I really thought this would be a hard one for us but it's been way smoother than I expected. I have to admit, I kind of miss having her close by, but I'm loving being able to roll over in bed whenever I feel like it!

post #5 of 6

I would put a bed in your room for him and get him to go to sleep in his bed at night and then either just let him come in to your bed if he wakes up or lie down with him in his bed then when he's used to that move his bed into his own room and make a big deal of  decorating his room and buying a new duvet cover and stuff.

post #6 of 6

Just saw the bit about him napping in his own bed / room. If that's the case I would just get him to go to sleep in his room and let him come in to your bed if he wakes up. My boys have solar powered torches which I turn on at bedtime and last all night, works well as a nightlight and they can find them and use them to come in to my room at night.

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