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Leaving 14 month old in tub by herself.....? - Page 2

post #21 of 31
Thread Starter 

Thanks for all the advice. I think I will try the "deal" thing with him.

post #22 of 31

Show him this YouTube video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LDzZvnFJAr8


Make him read this: http://www.cpsc.gov/cpscpub/prerel/prhtml11/11322.html



post #23 of 31
Thread Starter 

Thanks Lynn! I was kind of looking for something like that.

post #24 of 31


Originally Posted by NiteNicole View Post

I don't dislike conflict - I don't thrive on it but I don't mind being direct.  I do like having my husband listen to me and take my opinions and advice (and sheer panic, as if I discovered a 14 month old alone in a bath full of water, there would be some of that thrown in for SURE) seriously instead of getting defensive and not hearing WHAT I had to say because he was so put off by HOW I chose to say it.  If he did the same thing repeatedly and blew off my concerns, I would be mad AT him and we would talk about that, but if it was a one-off lapse in judgement then my priority would be giving him the information he needed to make sure it didn't happen again.


I do think a lot of people don't realize water doesn't have to be over-the-head deep to be a danger and children drown silently - and swiftly.  It's an easy mistake to make.  Once is a mistake, twice...then you flip out.


Either way, glad everyone is fine. 

Yeah, I get what you're saying but I think there was no way she couldn't have been scared to death.  I do think it needs to get worked out calmly now.


post #25 of 31


Originally Posted by Snapdragon View Post

totally wrong on his part. I think he needs to get over his defensivness- it is not his job to only help with his child as long as he can do it his way- it is his job to care for his child and keep them safe. Leaving a 14 month old alone in a tub and going to the basement? completely dangerous- and that is a fact. So he needs to understand basic safety- not think it is your opinion versus his. And rib high water is high- even supervised imo. My ds is 24 months and I never leave him alone in the tub- 14 months is unthinkable imo. If your dh can't understand that, then someone needs to teach him basic safety- or else he just needs to be designated less risky jobs.



post #26 of 31

If I were doing something that could risk my child's life I would want someone to tell me...even if they had to yell at me to make me get the point.  My child is more important than my pride. Like I said before, I'm sure OP's dh is a loving dad and probably got upset cause he didn't realize how serious what he was doing really was until OP got upset.  But now that they are calm he needs to not do it anymore...it's not about him "hurting her feelings."  I really hope the deal works cause this is scaring me. 

post #27 of 31
Thread Starter 

Well, I think he gets it now. It seems like it has been drilled into his head. He took DD to her ECFE class today and I guess they were talking about how to not be helicopter parents but not be neglectful too, so that was good.

post #28 of 31

That's great!  Good timing!

post #29 of 31
I would have completely freaked out. Reminds me of when hubby used to run into the bathroom to get water to rinse whipes leaving baby on the changing table. I was gritting my teeth the first few times telling him how wrong it was. It wasn't untill I pretty much screamed at him the last time then he stoped. He is an absolutely amazing father.....its just something with a lot of men and safety issues I think. Its as if Their brain just does not work the same as ours! Like they truely believe "aahh its fine nothings gonna happen" We have also had some pretty heated arguments about the car seat being installed correctly......since he refuses to read the manual. Men!
post #30 of 31

V. dangerous. Luckily for me dh is much more careful than me.

post #31 of 31

SHow him some stats.  Guys like numbers usually.  Here's a start :


"While parents might think they will only be out of the room for a minute while they fetch a towel or a change of clothes, this absence can be all the time required for a toddler to drown" said Rob Bradley CEO, Royal Life Saving. Baby bath aids are also no substitute for adult supervision they are only designed to assist an adult bathing a child."




Bathtubs – Next to swimming pools, bathtubs pose the greatest home drowning risk. In 2002, the CPSC reported 69 cases of bathtub drownings in children. 80% of them were under age 2. Being with an older sibling does not substitute for parental supervision: almost 40% of bathtub drownings occurred when another child was in the tub.

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