completely overwhelmed and burned out

[mamatoady]

I am struggling so much right now.  I am going to school and have a 9,6, and 2.5 year old.  I am behind in everything school to the point I really don't think I can catch up.  I can't let go of a semester because of loans/grants.  If I let these classes slide I will get reduced funding next term and that's how I live--I don't have a job, can't find a job.  I've been on interviews, but don't get hired and this is a very rural town--not much anyway.  I am giving up $30 yet again for a day of child care, even though I can't afford it, and I still can't get my I&% together.  DHS won't pay childcare for me (whole 'nother story), no child support, and our family is issuing with our neighbor (single mom with kids) so I keep having to hear her crap on top of my own.  I cannot bring myself together.  I need a break now! Not 3,5,6 weeks from now.  I have no idea what to do.  

sarah

[chloema]

Can you talk to your professors and explain what you're going through? Maybe they will give you some time to catch up and get yourself together. Hang in there!

[zebra15]

  I totally understand.  I was taking classes for a teaching certificate and I was totally overwhelmed with those a couple years ago.  I was going to go back to class last fall (2011) to finish/ redo my MBA but I just could not fathom how to handle that.  I'm in the same boat as you, I can not find a job and I would rely on the financial aid and DES

What happens if you take an incomplete and finish over the summer?  Can you change to pass/fail status of the classes or audit them?  Do you have a full course load or part time, are some of the professors more understanding than others, if so I would approach the understanding ones first.

Do you need to keep a certain GPA or can you survive with C's in the classes?  I was killing myself trying to keep a 4.0, I finally gave up with student teaching and let things slide and settled for C's.  I felt so much when I lowered my own personal bar, I knew I could do A work but mentally I needed to be at the C level to survive and I learned to be ok with that.

Distance yourself from the neighbor. You just can not process more drama.  

[Mommel]

I can totally relate to this. I'm sorry I have no real advice, but for me sometimes it's good to know you're not alone. I only have one 7 month old kiddo, but I have full time school, part-time work from home and a part-time unpaid internship also from home. It's A LOT! I'm only two weeks into the term and I already feel like I'm going to lose it by the end of every day. I barely keep it together by breathing deeply when I remember to, taking ibuprofen every so often for the physical aches of weariness (I used to be adamant about not taking a single thing while nursing even though my NP said IB was okay), and making sure I eat well, sleep enough, and talk to another adult about what I'm going through every day. I have a few cheerleaders who keep me plugging ahead. It's also really helpful to daydream and focus on the light at the end of the tunnel. It won't be like this forever. 

[silverbellpress]

Is there 'respite care' in your town or nearby? It's for scenarios like yours. It sounds like you are being very hard on yourself. It also sounds like you are doing all you can and more. I would reach out for help in any and every direction, knowing that you are the (strong, capable) linchpin to your whole family and you need to take care of yourself to take care of them. You are telling us you need a break. Can you tell yourself that too?

Also, I take supplements to help with emotional/physiological states. There's one called Adrenal Health by Gaia that might make you feel lots better. And also: this will pass.

[GoMamaMel]

"this will pass" i totally agree. I'm living on the same as you, grants and loans for school and I'm feeling the heat right now as well. Its crunch time in the semester and not only am i behind but even when I have the time to do homework (like right now) i feel so burned out that i dont even want to look at it, which of course makes the problem worse and its a vicious cycle. 

to basically reiterate what others have said before me: consider lowering your standards. it sounds awful but i have come to that point recently where I know its unhealthy for me to stress myself out over a 4.0 with everything on my plate. And i would recommend talking with your professors as well. i've had to do that and while one of them was not very understanding, most of them were and allowed me to make-up work or turn in extra credit in order to make up the points. I agree with what others have said that you should distance yourself from your neighbor. You don't need that right now. you need to put your needs first right now mama. 

this season will pass. and you will look back and be amazed at how strong you were to make it though. provision will come, and you won't even know how it happened, but thats what will make it so beautiful. You can do it mama. Good luck.